I am a convicted felon. 3 years ago I posted an AMA: I am a former drug mule. Here I am 3 years later now as a convict.

What happened to your possessions outside of prison like apartment/house, car, bills? What drugs did you carry? What do you do for a living nowadays?

Thanks for the ama

My parents took care of my few possessions.

The only drugs I transported were marijuana and cocaine.

I invested the money I got from the stimulus checks and am living off of that for now.

Dude you replied to... every fucking question. What the fuck? Best AMA of the decade so far just due to pure effort.

I'm trying my best!

You did your time and can live as a free man. What's the plan from here?

I'm going to write a book and write about all the fucked up things the people I was working for did.

What’s a positive thing you’ve learned from the experience, something that would surprise others looking at your situation?

It took me to hit rock bottom to finally understand my actions. Before prison I was getting drunk everyday and hurting those I loved. I vowed to myself, I will never be that guy again.

Were there any parts of prison that you preferred over life on the outside?

I liked the sense of humor everyone had.

Is the humor different in prison? Whats a banger joke in prison?

It's a lot of gay jokes, but I liked the ones where we could make fun of ourselves and our situations.

A lot of guys would call their girlfriends/wives on a Friday night and of course it would go straight to voicemail. I would always tell them, "nah man, your girls at church". When in reality they were probably at the club.

As a sort-of aside, how are gay people treated in prison? Not just flamboyant ones, just if you were to slip that you had a boyfriend on the outside, would you be avoided, get beat up, or treated no differently than a non-gay inmate?

As long as you keep your hands to yourself, you'll be fine.

I would assume prison jokes are a lot like construction jokes.

What is a good construction joke?

First day this crew came on my job site. Guy comes up and says, "Hey man, just wanted to let you know we got a gay iron worker on site. If you gimme a kiss I'll tell you who he is."

Lol

The conversation about prison humor reminded me of a podcast hosted by a (supervised) inmate at San Quentin about how prison culture is different from the outside, and your responses were just like the kind of things he and his interviewees say. I figured you or others in the thread may find it interesting.

Humor is the best way to cope with shitty situations.

How did the arrest go down? And how were the first 24 hours after getting put into cuffs feel?

DEA politely knocked on my door, identified me and cuffed me. No guns were drawn.

The first 24 hours sucked. I slept most of it.

From handcuffs at your door to in your cell what was the process at the federal level?

I was taken to the DEA office for interrogation and then to local PD to spend the night. The next day I went to court to get arraigned and then transferred to a federal detention center.

Was your AMA part of the reason you were arrested?

Not at all. Feds were already tracking me long before the ama.

Did they know it was you who did the AMA? Was it in evidence?

No and no.

Did they tell you so, send a letter?

I learned this at my discovery.

That's interesting. What surprised you about what they already knew?

What surprised me was how incredibly dumb they are. Half the things they had on me was completely wrong.

Could we get a brief example or two? Thanks!

They thought the big bad boss was some low level junkie.

What's the first thing you did when you got out?

Googled celebrity nudes.

Why this? Did you hear about something in particular that you wanted to see? Or is this just your preferred adult content?

I just wanted to see if there were more leaked nudes of celebrities.

What got you arrested? How long did you know it was coming ?

At least 6 months prior to my arrest. They arrested my co-defendant (drug boss) 2 months before me.

Ever consider going on the run?

No. Mexico was the last place I wanted to be.

How did you spend the months leading up to arrest, knowing it was coming?

I continued going to school, waiting for the inevitable.

What's the worst thing you saw in prison?

A buddy of mine got the living shit beat out of him. That was painful to watch. He was a friend, but I couldn't step in because he was a gang member. If I'd done that then both of us would've been sent to the hospital.

What triggers gang violence? Do they attack each other for no reason? Just avoiding as much contact as possible?

Usually it's the result of someone disrespecting someone else. Also, drug debts cause a lot of conflict.

Why though? It seems like a place where you can easily fade into non-existence. Hard to track down and find. I lived in CDMX and it's huge, the outskirts are huuuuuge. You can rent a small room somewhere, pay cash, live cheap and anonymously, work in a community kitchen or something, get a job in some shop earning money off the books...

That all sounds like more work than prison.

Exactly

If you knew it was coming, why didn't you either try to run or turn yourself in?

Wouldn't the waiting be stressful as hell?

I was trying to finish my college semester.

Did you?

I finished 2 out of 4.

What did you learn in prison?

Did you study or practice anything?

What helped pass the time with no internet?

What’s it like leaving daily access to the internet, then coming back years later?

I read over 300 books including the dictionary, thesaurus, bible, etc.

I spent my time getting into the best shape of my life. I watched a lot of football as well.

I jumped onto FB the first chance I got. Everyone I knew either had kids or were still doing the same thing they were doing before my incarceration.

If you Don't mind me asking what exercises did you do to get into the best shape of your life

Navy Seal burpees and a lot of running.

Did you eat okay? When I was in jail I felt like I was always starving, never understood how people could work out when they couldn't get enough to eat.

Federal prisoners eat good. Plus our commissary.

How are the prices on the commissary stuff?

30% markup. Not bad. I lived comfortably.

How do you earn and how much do you earn in prison? Were your parents able to send you money?

My parents sent me money occasionally and I had my hustle while in prison.

Helping people write to their lawyers/judges regarding their cases.

What book(s) did you enjoy/value the most?

Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth, World without End.

Michael Crichton's State of Fear was one of my favorites too.

Were you treated fairly in prison?

Did you ever see instances of favoritism, Racism, or illegal activity with the prison guards/employees?

What are the most important do's and don'ts of prison?

Thank you for the AMA

I was treated with respect because I treat others with respect.

Some guards favor inmates of their own race.

DO NOT EVER STEAL in prison. The absolute NO NO

Mind your own business and you'll be good.

I imagine you don't get a whole lot of computer time. What do you spend your time doing aside from probably reading a lot ? Anything else to stay occupied?

I exercise extensively and watch a lot of football. Who dey!

Asking for my mom, do you have an opinion on how to stop trafficking?

I don't have the answers to that my dude.

That's quite the life, you doin okay man?

Considering the circumstances, I'm doing okay.

You said it was a weight off your shoulders. Was it the pressure to continue mulling and serving time was your only out, or was it just the fear of being caught at any time as well as not knowing the level of force coming down on you?

The latter. I was afraid I'd get 20 years in prison.

What surprised you the most about prison in general?

How polite everyone is.

Did you have to join a prison gang?

I was offered, but I said no.

Were there any consequences to declining?

None whatsoever

Were they cordial about it?

Yeah

What were you charged with?

What level prison did you go to?

Did you have support from the outside while you were in?

Did you cooperate? If not, what was the deal offered if you did?

Public defender or did you get a paid attorney? How were they?

What drugs were you muling?

What are your plans now?

Conspiracy with intent to distribute.

Low

I received a safety valve so kinda.

I did at first, but ultimately my friends and family ended up abandoning me. Only my parents and best friend stuck around.

Marijuana and cocaine.

I intend to write a book.

What’s a “safety valve” in this context?

I told them my part in the conspiracy and accepted responsibility.

At one time I was a seller of things at a mid level and while I was there on top had girls every weekend a house full friends out the ass to many always wanting to hang out I was using at the time and I got hit with a bunch of charges from a snitch I quit after I got out and I have had two friends over in five or six years, everyone figured out they could not hang out get hi for free or sell them stuff I was no longer valued, I will say that 1k n honest money does what 10k biz money gets u I swear I made like 3500-6500 a week or sometimes n a day and had issues paying bills it seemed like

I know the feeling brother...

Get on TikTok. Huge topic on there. You’ll blow up

What is Tiktok? I know it's another social platform but have no idea how to navigate it.

I'm wondering, how did you perceive the beginning and evolution of Covid, and has it affected you?

What's the general point of view about it in prison?

I was in prison long before covid. When it became a pandemic it was a little disheartening to see the world ravaged by the virus. I had to go to the optometrist during covid and it was really weird seeing the free world during the pandemic. My city looked like a ghost town. Having your temperature checked and hands sanitized before you enter an establishment was so weird to me.

Can you give a brief description of how going to optometrist was like? Were you escorted by many guards? Thanks and all the best man

I was cuffed with 2 armed guards escorting me. We went to a free world doctor and everyone who was in the doctor's office kept staring at me. One mother placed herself between her little boy as they walked past me. That small gesture kinda stung.

How do haircuts work in prison? Can you only get them on a set schedule? Is there a prison barber?

There are always a couple of barbers. One would use the clippers and others would razors.

Is there like a really good one who takes appointments and gets paid in commissary? I would imagine you could run a decent little hustle if you were a great barber.

Yeah, there's always a barber who runs it like that. Now the prison currency is cashapp.

You get to have a cell phone in there?

Cell phones are contraband, but yes some inmates do have them.

Do you have a career interest you plan on pursuing now that you're out?

I know how to weld. I may go back to school to get certified.

What's your favourite potato based dish?

French fries.

What are the best job opportunities for an ex-felon?

I know there are a lot of limitations, which I find short sighted honestly.

Felons can not vote, cannot hold security clearance, cannot enlist in the military (seems like a good place for rehabilitation imho), I don’t know if they can get a business license, but a professional license is limited.

Truck driving, welding, HVAC were always the most commonly named jobs for ex-cons.

Best and worst part of being in prison?

Prison gave me a chance to be introspective.

Worst part? My dog died, my girl left me and all but one of my friends abandoned me.

Well, now you can write a hit country song and be set for life.

I'm the next Taylor Swift

Did you see a lot of fights inside? Has anyone tried picking a fight with you there?

I only saw a handful of fights. I was involved in 2 fights (self defense).

Did you face any punishment from the prison (or further retaliation from the person who attacked you or their friends) after the fights?

5 months in solitary confinement.

How does someone live five months in solitary and doesn't go insane. What do you do in solitary confinement?

We had radios. I listened to a lot of music, talked football with the guards, read the newspaper( yes, we got the newspaper). It was kinda fun.

Why did you have to self defend? Could the fights have been avoided?

The guys swung first I was going to swing back too.

If we decided to shift the focus from punishment to rehabilitation, what changes would you recommend to improve the success rate?

I think the first step would be to reduce the harsh mandatory minimum sentences. If someone gets 10 years for peddling drugs chances are he'll become institutionalized and continue to mess up.

What is the most effective way to transport drugs?

In my opinion, 18 wheelers.

Did your Reddit thread ever come up in evidence?

No

What's the plan now bud?

I'm gonna write a book

Having been through it, what are your thoughts on the criminal justice system? If that's too broad or complicated to get into, how many stars would you rate it?

The feds definitely like to fuck people over. I was convicted for a crime I did not commit. Yes I trafficked drugs, but not the drugs they claimed.

If they convicted you of the drugs you actually trafficked, do you think your sentence would've changed at all?

I would've been out is 1.5 years instead of 3.

Do you have money leftover or did the feds take it all?

I had used up all my money by the time they arrested me.

Have you found legal employment yet?

Not yet

I don’t mean to be insensitive, but does that mean you’re basically starting things/life from square 1?

I guess I’ve just always been curious how people get by when they’ve kind of lost it all.

Basically yeah, but with a little money for a headstart.

What's the #1 thing in prison/the prison system that needs reform in your opinion?

Reduce the harsh mandatory minimum on drug charges.

How long were you in prison for?

3 years

What was your initial reaction to Tiger King?

I saw it, thought it was fucked up. But who am I to judge?

Would you mind elaborating on what eventually brought you down?

My drug boss was arrested (I had already left the game 6 months at this point). He cooperated with the feds and gave me up.

That's fucked up. Did they have any other evidence beside your boss talking?

Nothing else! I spent hours in the law library fighting my own case. My attorney said we could take it to trial, but my co defendant would've testified against me. Feds have a 97% conviction rate. If I would have lost I would have received at least 20 years.

Ah shoot. Any hard feelings towards him?

Elsewhere in the thread he mentions that the guy thought he was snitching on them and was making plans to kidnap him. So I doubt they're good buddies, lol.

You are right sir!

Not anymore. He did what he had to do.

How did your mental health transition throughout the process, from paranoia, to prison, to release?

Looking back, is there anything you would do differently?

Prior to my incarceration I was quite paranoid. Always looking over my shoulder, always scanning the parking lots for undercovers. I think however, my paranoia was justified. It became known to me that there was a plot to kidnap me.

In prison, a lot of people thought I was criminally insane because of my sense of humor. I don't think I'm insane I just like to laugh at the situation if possible.

Can you expand please on the plot to kidnap you?

The drug network I was working for was under surveillance. A lot of the jobs they did were foiled by the feds and everyone seemed to think I was behind it.

I came across a recording between my boss and his boss scheming to kidnap me and take me to Mexico to question me.

Hey man, hope things have changed for the better for you and that the journey ahead may be tough, but I hope you won't go back to prison again.
Do you feel paranoid that your drug boss or someone else might be out to get you? Or do you ever feel that if you turned them down and don't intend to distribute again, that could rub them off the wrong way?

My drug boss will most likely die in prison. Everyone he was working for is hiding. Either way, I will never return to my home town.

Prison in the media has a lot of downtime sitting in a cell doing absolutely nothing, how does that compare to what you were subjected to? I can imagine it wasn't fun per se but I also have a genuine question; would you say it was worth it? Given how much you've learned and changed throughout your spent time.

Those 5 months in solitary confinement was the best thing that ever happened to me. I learned more about myself in 5 months than I had in 20+ years of life.

What did you experience exactly? Any hallucinations?

The correctional officers posted there really took a liking to me. One even said, "you're a good kid. It kills me to see you in here. You don't act like the other idiots in here."

Solitary confinement gave me a lot of time to think. I realized just how fucked up I was before prison. I just learned to forgive myself.

Did you have access to as many books as you wanted in solitary?

Oh yeah. 5 books a week from a wide selection.

What do you think your chances were of surviving being kidnapped and brought to Mexico for questioning?

Close to zero. I think they were set on killing me.

I have been in a similar situation with the DEA, oh man that is such a horrid feeling seeing those vests. Where did you serve your time? How much weight did you get charged with? I kept my nose clean for a while until Covid hit but retired due to some other real life issues, but am still on the straight and narrow. I’m guessing there are zero thoughts going through your head of a return? I’m way too fearful of a prison sentence

I went to a low level security prison. One time is enough for me. Never will I return to a life of crime.

What advice would you give for someone going into prison the same amount of time as you?

Mind your own business, don't join a gang, work out.

Ever watch any prison shows or documentaries? Are any of them realistic?

I've watched locked up on National geographic. The thing about that is, it's only state prison. Federal prison is far better than state.

Do you have any shame?

I used to have a lot of guilt because of my actions. I even tried to kill myself because I felt so guilty. I learned to forgive myself and move on.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being the equivalent of smuggling drugs into Singapore) how desperate or stupid were you when you started muling?

7

Which cartel did you work for?

Cartel del golfo

Did being a criminal help you with the ladies? What kind of women were attracted to you?

What's your plan romance-wise?

I'm in relatively good shape and definitely carry myself differently after everything I been through. I'm currently talking to a girl way out of my league so I'd like to say yes.

I attract fat chicks for some reason.

Right now I just want to find a nice girl who doesn't care about my past crimes.

What if she did care, but still wants to know your and understand who you are now vs then? From no experience whatsoever, I bet you'd probably find better prospects with people who were thoughtful about it rather than those who just don't care. I understand that's completely unsolicited. I'm cool with fucking off.

I'd be more than willing to talk to her about my past with her. What I meant was more in the sense of my past does not define me.

Did you ever meet any murderers?

I met one 19 year old kid there for capital murder. He was a little off... He was ecstatic after only getting 29 years.

What was your first meal after getting out?

Whataburger

What was your prison hustle?

I helped people write letters to their lawyer/judge. I've always had a talent for profound writing.

Would you go back to your former life?

How much did you make? Weekly, monthly etc? Was it enough to make you feel secure enough for your future and to not not want to leave that lifestyle?

Never. I like women too much

How did you find the transition back into the real world from the pen?

Are there things that you forgot about like how to time cars to cross the street?

Having looked in the eyes of a stranger, or even a woman for example like an assistant when shopping, first few moments when you have been out. Did it trip you out a bit?

How hard is it to find work as a criminal?

I gave absolutely zero fucks of what people thought about me. After what I've been through I just don't care what people think or say about me.

Do you think there’s anything anyone could of told you before you started, that would of made a difference in you not going this route in life?

I learned long ago to stop asking myself "what if, I should've..." What's done is done and I'm okay with what happened. Some people just have to learn the hard way and I was one of those.

Was there prison hooch? I brew beer and wonder if brewers are in high demand and what the competition would be like.

I tried it twice and it was really weak. Then I realized it's kinda sad to be drinking in prison so I stopped.

What was your first sexual experience like when you got out?

I nutted in like 2 seconds.

What’s the first meal you had as a free man?

Whataburger.

Are you alright? Any plans for the future? Many wishes from California.

I'm going to write a book.

Did you see prison rape/sex?

Not where I was at, but perhaps at a USP.

What is USP?

United States penitentiary (Maximum security)

Any advice for a fugitive avoiding the law currently? Asking for a friend.

Mexico

[deleted]

Hoo-yah