By Request, I am Allie Brosh of Hyperbole and a Half. AMA.

Your comic pretty consistently makes my day. It's awesome!

Thank you! It makes me happy that I can make you happy!

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I apologize about your dignity, but that does make me feel very special.

However, I will have you know that I slaughter baby pandas and drink their blood, but not all of it. I throw the rest away just because I can. That's right. I'm extremely frivolous with the blood that baby pandas died to give me.

I don't have anything to ask, but I want to say that it takes a special type of talent to make something look so shitty, yet look so perfect. Like this. Thanks for the laughs.

You have no idea how happy it makes me that someone thought that about that particular drawing. I think that guy may be one of my favorites.

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I agree.

My six year old loved the INTERNET FOREVER!!! picture so much at that she replicated in Legos, and screams INTERNET FOREVER!!! at it. Alot.

She's kind of autistic. But who isn't any more. Someday I'll take a picture of it (you can't take her stuff apart, or else) and send it to Tubemonster.

Oh dear, this made me laugh pretty hard! Please, please, please take a picture. A video may be even better (it may capture some of the screaming!)

OMG CAN I HAVE A SIGNED COPY?!

But seriously, can I? Because you're awesome.

Here you go! I didn't really know what to sign, so I improvised.

I would buy signed posters. Just saying...

I'd feel kind of weird selling them though... like I'd be acknowledging that I think I'm important enough to sell signed posters.

• How did you come up with the idea for the site?

• How do you feel about your recent internet fame?

• What is your favorite part about what you do?

• What is your most popular story?

• What is your personal favorite story?

• How did you come up with your Reddit screen name?

• How did you come up with your Website name?

• What is your favorite book?

• I started my blog (I hate that word) because I was procrastinating on studying for a physics final last summer. I'd written some notes on Facebook earlier in the year that my friends seemed to like, so I guess I kind of just wanted to see whether other people would like the stuff I wrote too.

• While it's sometimes a bit overwhelming for me, I am beyond ecstatic that I can be successful doing something I love. It is very exciting.

• It's fun and I get to control my own schedule. It is definitely a lot of work, but it doesn't really seem like it since I enjoy doing it and if I start feeling burnt out, I can take a little break.

• This one

• This one or this one. I had the most fun writing them.

• I was thinking of "tubemonster" like an internet gremlin, but apparently it's also the name of a porn site. Oh well.

• It was just one of the first things that came to mind when I was thinking of what name to put down while I was creating the blog. I feel like it fits, though.

You missed "What is your favorite book?" :)

Either The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy or Fight Club. For completely different reasons.

Physics test, eh? What were you studying as a major? What was your career going to be before you figured out that you'll never be an adult?

I graduated with a BA in human biology. I wanted to go into medical research.

My only question is, am I doing it right?

Absolutely.

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Well, we are now mutual friends! Hooray for Reddit!

I don't know if this is terribly unusual, but one of my favorite hobbies is nighttime adventuring (and sometimes drunken nighttime adventuring. Even if the adventure has no point and me and whomever I'm with just end up wandering around aimlessly, it usually makes for good memories.

I sleep on my stomach with my head all contorted to the side, my arms straight downward and one leg bent. I almost can't sleep in any other position.

My favorite smell is probably juniper bushes or dry, wet grass and leaves (like after it rains in the fall).

Seriously, very few things on the internet make me laugh as hard as your posts. Thank you for providing awesome reprieve during my work day (and sometimes after work, when I just need a laugh). :)

What part of the country do you live in? Did you grow up there?

First of all, thank you!

As far as where I live, for now I live in Hamilton, Montana, which is a tiny little town (~3,000 people, I think). In a few weeks, though, I'm moving to Bend, Oregon.

I was born in Auburn, California, but moved to Sandpoint, Idaho when I was 7 years old. I lived in Sandpoint until I went away to college in Missoula, Montana.

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Do you live in Bend?

I don't downhill ski much anymore (can't afford it), but I cross country ski a lot!

This is so weird. I just discovered your blog tonight, and I spent my entire night reading it from the beginning. I was having a really shitty day and you made it so much better. You're hysterical and awesome and I don't remember the last time I actually sat cackling out loud at my computer. I also used your procrastination badge as my userpic on facebook, but gave you credit, I hope that's cool. Thank you for existing!

I guess I need a question..Do you enjoy animal crackers?

I fucking love animal crackers!

(And yes, that's totally fine about the Facebook picture).

Have you talked with agents/publishers/gremlins about writing a book?

If you think about it, and want to self-publish, I know an awful lot about that sort of thing, and would be delighted to help you in any way I can.

Hi Wil!

I'm not supposed to talk about it in detail quite yet because there's no deal in place or anything, but I'm working with an agent on writing a book proposal right now (one of the reasons updates have been so painfully slow). I've always wanted to write a book, so I'm really excited!

And you have already helped me in more ways than you know, Wil. I think you helped put me on the map for many of the people who have contacted me about writing for TV or representing me in some form. I've gotten many emails that begin like "I saw that Wil Wheaton tweeted about you, and..." So thank you :)

Not gunna lie, kinda jealous of the guy that got a personalised thing. Hook me up? :D

Here you go: http://i.imgur.com/yzUW0.png

When you wrote your post about how you don't really feel like an adult, were you reading my diary?

Because seriously, that is how my life works.

I think a lot of people are "pretend adults." The trouble is, they do a good job at pretending and so they look like real adults to everyone else :)

i would like your opinion of my only attempt at art. i think she has pizazz. your thoughts?

So that's how that picture is supposed to go! Thank you!

My favorite comic of yours is my favorite not because you made me laugh...

...but because you made me cry.

It was dog that did it. I used to have a dog, called her Sam. One of the best dogs ever, was my constant companion. She was the type of dog whose foibles made her feel so human that there was no way you couldn't love her. She'd come over and plop her head in your lap, in a "please pet me, come on, I'm so furry and lovable you just know you want to" way. Every night, she'd make the rounds of the family, checking in to make sure everyone was in bed, before sleeping at the foot of the bed of whoever was least senior (and therefore needed the most protecting) for the night. She'd check out all my girlfriends when I brought them over, either being immediately friendly and winning over even non-dog-loving girls, or shunning them entirely (and as it turns out, was an excellent judge of character). And she could put a mean chase on a laser pointer!

But like your dog, I too feared that Sam was retarded. I had read the list of dog tests to determine your dog's intelligence in a magazine (remember those?), and one night decided to try it out. They were slightly different but essentially the same. Like your dog, she tried ever so hard at passing each test, but never really 'got' any of them in a meaningful way. Reading your comic brought back the memories in almost frightening detail, as the testing method, the dog's bewildered but lovable reactions, and my reactions were nearly identical to my experience. And for this I both thank and curse you, because it made me remember.

You see, there was an accident. My parents would take Sam out for a walk every morning, while us kids were still getting ourselves sorted out for school. That morning was like every other typical morning; I was tired from staying up way too late the night before and was brushing my teeth. I can still remember the sound...

...you know the sickening sound of car tires screeching hard, then of a car crunching into something when it's in an accident? That sound.

Turns out my parents had been crossing the road right by our house, with Sam beside them. Some drunk asshole came through and either didn't notice or didn't care that he was going way too fast to make the left, and oh by the way you're about to mow down a dog and two people. He plowed through Sam, hit my mom, and clipped my dad.

It's amazing how fast you wake up when you hear that sound.

I ran out of the house to find the dog lying on the ground, my mom lying on the ground, my dad hovering over my mom, and the car smashed into a tree. (If my dad had been a half stride behind where he was, he would have been pinned between the car and the tree.) I remember three ambulances showing up (one for drunk asshole, one for my mom, and one for my dad), but the dog wasn't their concern. So while they loaded my parents and asshole into ambulances, my sister and I scooped up Sam into a blanket and raced her off to the vet. I remember having a freak out moment on the ride when we were trying to figure out whether all the blood in the back was coming from the dog, or had been from my mom.

I haven't thought about that day (or even Sam) for a long, long time. But sometimes it takes someone reliving their close-enough-to-yours-to-be-shared memory to unlock the gates, to get you back in touch with feelings you intentionally had forgotten, and to force you to make peace with what happened. And for that, I thank you.

Thank you for sharing that. I am so grateful (and humbled!) that you could find some peace through my post.

Have you ever met any of your readers in real life? Have you ever had anyone recognize you? Did they try to engage you in painfully awkward conversation while you try to escape into your house?

(Can...can you draw me a hedgehog? I like hedgehogs.)

(If you say no, I promise not to like you any less!)

I met one of my readers because she randomly happened to be friends with my neighbors (she sent them a link to one of my posts and they were like "yeah we've read that, she lives next to us.") She came out to visit them and we met then. I've never actually had anyone recognize me in public, though. It could be partially because I'm reclusive and I live in the middle of nowhere, though.

Oh, my local newspaper wrote an article about me, which led to an extremely awkward exchange with a woman who knocked on my door trying to get me to promote this herbal supplement she was selling. She was like "here... have this free sample. If you want to write about it or something, that would be cool." And I was like "I... I, uh.. don't really do that." She asked me why not, and I had to try to gently explain that I felt that writing random product reviews would compromise the already scant integrity of what I do. And then she was like "But my business is just starting and I could really use the help... come on..." It was like being spammed in real life, but with way, way, way more guilt and awkwardness.

Anyway, she works in K-Mart, and so every time I have to buy something from there (it's the only place in town that sells some things), I have to try to make small talk with her and avoid the subject of whether I've "tried that product" she gave me yet.

What do you like drawriting (See, because you both draw and write your stories out... nevermind... SHUT UP!) about the most? Childhood trauma or other random stuff, like your cool ads for products?

I love the term "drawriting"! I'm going to use that from now on to describe what I do.

Anyway, I think I like writing the more random stuff better, but when I look back at my posts after having written them, I think the childhood stories are funnier. They are just a little harder for me to write because there are more constraints.

Constraints as in you have to stick to the actual story? None of us would notice if you diverged jut a teensy bit... =P

That and writing transitions between parts of a story. If I don't remember something completely clearly, it's often hard to get from one point of the story to another while sticking close to the truth.

Spaghatta Nadle has too many friend requests to accept me.

Do you know how bad this makes me feel. And on how many levels?

Facebook won't let him have any more friends! I didn't know this when I set up the account, but Facebook has a friend limit (it's around 5,000 depending on how many groups someone is in).

do you uh...come here often?

I spend many, many hours on Reddit, so I suppose yes.

Hi Allie. You are so talented and I love your work. My favorite piece is the one about Texas. Please don't ever stop writing/drawing.

So here are my questions:

1) Do you ever get recognized when you're out? I mean, you never really write much about going out other than to Safeway...so do the local Hamilton, MT folks say, "Hey Allie, I read your blog and it's great! Mind reaching for that jar of peanut butter for me?"

2) How does Boyfriend feel about your fame and internet fortune?

3) Do you make enough money from H&AH and The Gloss to live comfortably? If not, what is the best thing that your readers can do to make sure you have health insurance, internet, and other necessities in life?

4) Would you consider writing a book? Or a daily comic? If you did, I would buy the book and/or subscribe to the newspaper that published your comic.

5) Do you still run competitively?

Thank you for being awesome!

1) I've never been spotted in the wild. I don't think the people of Hamilton really know who I am at all. But I kind of like it that way.

2) I think he likes it. I just asked him and he said "It's cool."

3) I live pretty simply and inexpensively and I make enough to comfortably support a simple and inexpensive lifestyle. As far as what my readers can do, you guys are already doing it! If it wasn't for my readers spreading my work far and sundry around the internet, I never would have made it this far!

4) I'm actually working on writing a book proposal right now. I'm not really allowed to say much about it since it's in the very beginning stages and there's no deal in place or anything, but I'm working on it.

5) I've been struggling with injuries and illnesses recently, but I do plan to keep running competitively once I'm able to train seriously again. For now, I'm just trying to enjoy running when I can and giving my body a break from strenuous training.

Dear Allie,

I'm a guy from Guam(yes, really) with a writing/drawing blog kind of like yours.(I feel embarrassed even comparing the two...lol.) When I started it, I didn't know that your blog existed...and when a friend directed me to your site, I was immediately shamed in the aura of your awesome...:(. My question is, when you were starting out, were your entries consistently bad-ass? Or were they kinda hit-and-miss? I'm just wondering because some days I feel like I'm cranking out awesome stuff and it gets a terrible reception, and sometimes I just throw stuff out on a whim and people like it. What was it like for you starting out?

Many thanks, Tom

I am pretty embarrassed by some of my older posts. I think most people who do stuff like this go through an awkward phase where they haven't quite found their style or voice. I may even feel that way about my current material sometime down the road.

Anyway, I think it's pretty normal to feel hit and miss at the start. What's important is to keep learning. Keep trying out new things and after a while, you'll find that some of them stick and feel right. Just keep accumulating the things that feel right :)

You are awesome. That's not really a question but it's relevant.

Uhhh. Questions. Do you collect anything? What's your favourite kind of shoes?

Thank you!

I used to collect Magic The Gathering cards (try not to judge...), but I don't really collect anything now. Well, I guess I have a thing about impulse-buying toys from 25-cent machines (like in grocery stores), but that's more of a vice than a purposeful attempt at collecting things. But we'll say I collect them. Because it makes me feel better about myself.

I've never really been that into shoes, but I go through them quickly because of running. I do have a pair of flip flops that are kind of neat.

I have to use up all the quarters in my purse if I see a gumball machine with stick-on moustaches. I know how you feel.

I like to buy the stick-on moustaches and then mail them to people without any explanation.

People you know, or just addresses picked at random, in the hopes that they exist?

People I know. But I don't put a return address on the envelope.

Do you... do you wanna play some Magic with me?

...pleeeaaaase? I'm not very good, I promise!

If you lived anywhere near me, I would play MTG with you in a heartbeat. But only old school. None of those bullshit new cards that look all robotic and fancy.

Is your dog still equally retarded as she was the day you got her? Doest thou have any cats? I'm assuming not. :P

Kay, two dumb questions. I'm not sure what else to ask.

Here, have a poorly drawn picture of the earth before it is devoured by our sun as it dies and becomes a red giant, destroying all life on earth. :D

http://imgur.com/IcgyV.png

Edit: Oh yeah, did someone actually gift you coupons? Because if someone gifts me coupons now I'm going to assume they did it because they read your post and they're being funny proceeded by me asking them where the fuck my real present is?

Thank you for the picture!

My dog is still retarded, but she is learning how to function better. Like, she can walk up and down the stairs now (even though she still doesn't do it normally) and she kind of learned how to sit. It also helps that we adopted another dog who has kind of fallen into a "translator" role. The helper dog is really smart, so the special dog learns things by watching the helper dog do them. I think that's the only reason she ever learned to sit, at least. The helper dog also herds the special dog away from danger or misbehavior. It's a nice little dynamic.

I don't have any cats, but I want cats. I make fun of animals a lot, but I really, really love them.

Why did you decide to start making these comics?

What's your dayjob? (Do you have a dayjob?)

I started writing as a means to procrastinate on studying for a physics test.

Draw-writing is my day job now :) Before that, I was unemployed and trying to make ends meet by running in races that offered prize money. Then I got hurt and couldn't race anymore, so I was just unemployed. I sold some of my furniture, but that's not really a job.

Running for prize money? What distances, and what are your PRs if you don't mind sharing?

I was injured all the time in college (especially toward the end), but my sophomore year PR in the 5k was 16:48. I think my 10k was 34:50.

I was usually better in cross country (fewer injuries), but times are hard to compare on such variable terrain.

I'm still curious about how fast I can run, so I haven't yet given up on trying to get faster.

Sometimes I secretly identify with your icon, and feel sad because I resonate so well with a small female character.

Is there any way you can make a slightly more masculine version of this?

...perhaps a BLUE shirt. Yeah. That's manly.

I'm commenting here to remind myself to come back and draw that for you!

Excuse me for a moment...

ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod she just acknowledged my existence and I am special now and maybe we can be internetsuperbestfriendsforever and maybe I can be funny too and now everything is super awesome

..And we're back.

..sup?

Here he is! http://i.imgur.com/VcEpP.png

How do you feel about the fact that someone at DragonCon last week was dressed in a square pink dress with a side blond ponytail? (I missed her, but a friend described her in detail). Does it scare you that everyone immediately exclaimed, "OMG she's dressed as Allie Brosh!" ?

Haha, did that really happen? If so, it is slightly scary but also kind of cool.

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Thank you! And I do read The Oatmeal!

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She drew a piece of his last comic, no?

Well, not exactly. Matt based one of his drawings (from his comic about working from home) off of the last panel from my post "This is Why I'll Never be an Adult." But he drew the picture.

I loved his take on it, though!

I think my favorite part about your blog is that not only are you hilarious, you're also so nice. On the internet you see a lot of humor at the expense of someone else (see: 4chan), but your posts are never like that. The worst you get is taking shots at yourself, but even then most readers can relate to it. I'm always left with a feeling like... "Hey, I thought this was just me, but I guess it's everyone."

I guess what I'm asking is, will you be my new best friend?

Thank you very much! I don't know you, but if we lived nearby, I'd certainly give you a shot at being my best friend!

Thank you for showing that girls exist on the internet and they play Magic!

No problem!

So I'm locked outside of my apartment. Should I call someone or try to climb in a window or what?

Well, first you should assess what floor you live on and whether you have a phone handy.

How do you draw the artwork?

I use Paintbrush, which is the Mac version of MS Paint (I'd say I use MS Paint, but I'd feel like I was lying). I usually just use my TrackPad, but I bought a Wacom tablet last week because I was getting Carpal Tunnel from the TrackPad. I'm not quite comfortable using the tablet yet. Oh, and the Wacom came with Corel Painter, which I might use every now and then in the future. I haven't decided if I like it yet.

How do you deal with your fame?

Differently on different days. I mean, most of the time I just feel normal. Then sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed. Then sometimes I think it's the coolest thing ever.

You write and draw some fantastically hilarious stuff. This often entertains me at work, where your work breaks me out of code and spreadsheet land and leaves me struggling feebly not to blow my cover while I make those quiet muffled little choking whimpering sounds that people make when they're trying to keep the laughs inside and their eyes go all watery in sympathy of the unreleased laugh emissions. (Aside, want to draw this?)

So what's your personal life like?

First of all, I love so much that I can cause another person to laugh that hard. It is one of the most rewarding feelings in the world!

As for my personal life, I live in Hamilton, Montana, with my boyfriend of five years and our two dogs and seven rats. I don't really know many people here because I work from home and I'm somewhat reclusive by nature (even though I'm very friendly), so my life is pretty quiet most days. I go running a lot (I love being outside) and I work a lot (I probably spend over 60 hours a week working). That being said, I do like to go out with my friends who still live in Missoula (45 miles North of where I live), get ragingly drunk and go adventuring.

Good job. You make me laugh often. Nothing you have posted is not funny. That is all.

Wait, supposed to have a question...um...have you thought about making some more custom shirts rather than going through zazzle? Your art style's color choices would lend itself very well to screen printing.

I've thought about it, but Zazzle is free and there are very few details that I have to worry about when it comes to printing and shipping (which is good, because if I had to orchestrate shipping and printing, no one would ever get anything ever.)

Have you ever done more 'traditional' artwork? Like, paintings and such? It would be awesome to see some of your favorite drawings as larger scale paintings. Could probably sell them, too!

I've always been really into art. I used to do more serious artwork where I was actually trying to make something look realistic rather than just trying to make it look funny, but I gave most of that stuff away. I might be able to find something to show you, though.

I've been a fan of your comics for a while, they always make me laugh :)

Most of the questions I would have asked have already been asked/answered so here are some new ones ( I hope ):

• What are your favorite comedies?

• Did you try different styles before deciding on this one or have your drawings always been similar to what we see on your website?

• If you were stranded on a desert island, what 3 things would you wish to have with you?

• Have you traveled far from home? If so, where?

• Pretty much anything Monty Python did.

• My drawings have always been somewhat similar, but they've evolved over time. It's weird comparing my first comics to my comics now!

• A plane, a pilot and a rape whistle.

• Unfortunately, I've never really had the money to travel (neither did my family). But I did get to travel within the US quite a bit for track and cross country, and I'm speaking in New York in a few weeks!

Do you act a certain way more so after you publish a comic?

Could you clarify?

Not sure how to word it. Are you conscious of your behaviors after you finished your comic? Since, I assume your comic reflects your daily life and thought processes.

Oh, like do I notice more often that I'm doing a certain behavior after I write about it? I think I do sometimes. Like after I write about social awkwardness, I'll be more aware of the times I'm doing the specific things I wrote about. It's kind of like after you learn a new word and then start hearing it everywhere. It's always been there, you just notice it more.

Do you draw with your mouse, or a stylus thing?

I usually draw with my TrackPad, but I bought a Wacom tablet last week and I'm trying to get used to using it.

Are people 5000x more likely to use 'alot' instead of 'a lot' with you intentionally, or 50000x?

I would say five hundred thousand million.