IAmA man that has spent my entire life in obesity. I've lost 295 lbs, 180 of which was over the last year and change. AMA

What makes you want to shave your face but leave a massive forest on your neck?

I'm on a mission from God.

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My calorie intake in a day isn't something I pay close attention to. Instead, I just eat foods that I know will be healthy, and I limit portion size. Instead of three massive meals, I start the day with a protein drink and a bowl of fruit. From there, I just snack on nuts, veggies, and other simple, healthy foods throughout the day. Cutting dairy, and gluten dramatically, without wholly eliminating it has been a huge improvement as well. Finally, after breakfast, I no longer drink calories in the day. Water only. No booze, no juice, no calories in my liquids, and that makes the biggest difference.

My workout routine this year was rigorous. For 10 weeks, I was in the gym 6 days a week, 3 hours a day. This was broken up into 15 min cardio warm-up, 1 hr 45 min lifting weights, and then 1 hr cardio (usually the elliptical machine). In that 10 weeks, I dropped 90 lbs, and over 10% body fat.

I did not, nor would I suggest using pills. Protein powders and supplements can be useful, but weight loss pills are not something that you would need.

My motivation was from many things, but my mother passed away last August at the age of 51, and I knew that if I didn't alter my trajectory, I was going to die young.

Being that you're 16, this is the best time for you to make the changes. You will never regret the sacrifices you make when you begin to see the results. Healthy food is fantastic, once you can learn to appreciate it for what it is. Life sustaining energy. The more you work out, and keep from slipping in your diet, the less you want shitty foods. The physical and mental upswings that you will receive from the change will compel you to continue making positive progress. You can only do it for you, but you are worth it, and you need to remind yourself of that. The only thing stopping you from doing it, is the fear of the change. Don't let fear stop you, ever.

My workout routine this year was rigorous. For 10 weeks, I was in the gym 6 days a week, 3 hours a day. This was broken up into 15 min cardio warm-up, 1 hr 45 min lifting weights, and then 1 hr cardio (usually the elliptical machine).

You...are...the...man!

In that 10 weeks, I dropped 90 lbs, and over 10% body fat.

I don't doubt it, that's a lot of hard work, and it pays off. Do you have any type of medical supervision and/or advice related to that exercise regimen, given that you've had heart problems in the past?

Not particularly. I have been told that I needed to diet and exercise by every doctor I've ever visited, and so I finally just did.

That's some dedication! Very impressive. You should be proud of your accomplishment.

Thank you. I very much am.

I can't even last 30 minutes in the gym. My muscles fail after that long. What is your routine for the weights?

Weight training was always new. While running on the elliptical was the same damn thing over and over, the weight training alternated everyday. Bicep and tricep days, chest and back days, leg days, and ab days. Go for as long as you can, and when you feel like you just can't go anymore, do ten more minutes. Then the next time you go, add five minutes to that, and so on.

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My glorious Old Dutch? That will stay longer than I draw breath.

It's genuinely the worst beard I have ever seen. I'm almost offended by it

My neckbeard keeps all the girls from the yard

and their mustache is better than mine.

Damn girl! That's better than mine

I would shave it, but it's just so fine.

Screw 'em, OP. It's easy to criticize from the comfort of your keyboard, but difficult to do things your own way.

I ain't ever ditching my shit.

Hey, thanks for posting this. Congrats on your progress!

What was your biggest motivation to lose weight?

My biggest motivation, not to be too macabre, was that my mother passed last year at a young age. I want to at least live longer than she had the chance to.

I'm sorry you lost your mom :(

I am, too, and it will always be with me. But most of us will lose our mothers. Most of us will lose our fathers. Some of us will lose our children, siblings, and all of us will lose friends. What is important is to remember that we still have the living, and that those who are lost are never forgotten. They remain in the people they reached.

I just lost my mother on Tuesday and this beautiful statement made me feel a little better. Thanks.

I'm glad I can give you that, and I'm sorry for your very recent loss. For me, it's been over a year now, and the pain of it won't go. Know that you are currently going through one of the hardest things you'll ever experience, and the decisions you make now will set your future course. Mourn for the loss of your mother, but celebrate the life that she gave you. And lean on the friends and family you have left. The more support you surround yourself with, the easier it becomes to make positive decisions grounded in reason, rather than negative choices made from heavy emotion.

I truly enjoyed the way you composed that last sentence. Just wonderful. :)

My father gave me the gift of words, and I will never find the right ones to thank him for it.

My sister has the same timeline as you, but she has no motivation to lose weight. Her health hasn't declined other than bad knees and general pain. It's tough on our family to see her sell herself short. She doesn't want help and doesn't see this will be a problem that will only get worse. Do you have any advice or insight? Therapy, just wait for her to hit rock bottom, force her?

For me, there was a ton of mental anguish that I buried deep within me under mounds of food. I was sexually abused when I was younger, and never talked about it. Food was easily accessible, and became the only way I knew how to cope. You can't force someone to make changes that they aren't willing to make. You can show them how to make changes, and let them see why they are worth the effort, and if they can see the benefit for themselves, that is when mindsets change. Love her. Be there for her. There are many reasons people let themselves become so defeated, and we live in a culture where self-reliance is celebrated. Asking for help is, for all intents and purposes, is a show of weakness. Accepting help is much easier, but you have to want it to begin with.

You are wise beyond your years. I'm happy it's working out for you.

As someone who is in the process of making that change (I lost 30 pounds this year, maybe not as impressive, but I also have a bit less to lose), it's always good to see others succeed.

I found that while at first I hated going to the gym, somewhere along the line, I started actually enjoying it, and looking forward to it. That change more than anything has helped me get it right.

That's the key to remember when either first starting, or getting back into the routine. There is a point (for me it was about two weeks in) where the good habits become daily requirements. Once you're there, you feel it from the moment you open your eyes in the morning. Keep up the good work!!

Do people treat you much different?

In so many different ways, yes. The most exciting difference for me is that now, women pay me attention, whereas before, it was all I could do just to borrow the time. However, it's little things. Mothers don't protect their children from me as often. I'm 6'5" tall, so I'm still very large, just proportionate, now. People immediately smile at me, instead of having to mask the face of feeling sorry with a sad upturning of lips. I can get a job in the front of house rather than being relegated to the kitchen. Also, I treat myself differently. I say nice, positive things about myself, rather than the outright hateful things that used to be part of my everyday inner monologue, and I'm far more open with people.

"I say nice, positive things about myself, rather than the outright hateful things that used to be part of my everyday inner monologue, and I'm far more open with people."
This is it. It's amazing how much things change when you lose weight. I haven't had remotely the same struggle, but I have been a bit overweight my whole life. Over the last year or two I've lost 30 pounds and it has completely changed my outlook. It's amazing what a difference it makes to feel healthier and more attractive, and I can't begin to imagine what it must feel like to lose more than that. Congrats on your determination and your achievement.

This is why I get to have nice things!

I feel like some of what you described may be you projecting your emotions, rather than the way things were. You've gained confidence and that is very hard to do.

Oh, so absolutely. We always fear that people are thinking our own worst thoughts towards us, when in reality, they are doing the same thing. We are a self-conscious breed.

What is/was the harder mental addiction to break? Your desire for sugar ( pepsi, candy, sweets ) or your desire for fast food?

The two really go hand in hand, but given the choice between a Baconator or a Mountain Dew to wash it down with, I'll take the Baconator a hundred times out of a hundred. God damn, I love greasy food, and still crave the ever loving fuck out of it.

Yes. I wrestled my whole life. Cutting weight and/or special diets really made me obsess about food. Only until I was older did I realize how powerful food and or sugar has been throughout my life. Dangerous stuff that Sugar/grease. And weed is still illegal. Smh

Sugar, salt, and fat, and as much for the public as possible. At least we just legalized here in Oregon. Now, my munchies are watery fruits. Life is good.

Watermelon munchies are the best munchies

Vassermelon, grapes, cantaloupe, melonmelon, etc. I'm glad I now know.

What the hell is a melonmelon?

Only the best type of fruitfruit.

Eat mango when toking makes the high last longer, plus it tastes awesome.

Edit: also congrats on you overcoming your past, because that is what you have done losing this weight. Told that person who fucked with you that they no longer control you and your thoughts, and you are worth much more than self harming with over eating.
Pat yourself on the back, from the sounds of it you are probably healthier than a lot if reddit/people. Healthy body = healthy mind, well it helps 254356632%

Keep up the progress and carry on being you.

Thank you. I try to remember that, as far as I have come, there are just new hurdles to clear. Patting myself on the back is a regular activity, these days, but I try not to close my eyes while I do it.

Fuuuuuuuck... This is exactly how I am. I'm 23, 350+ though it's been a while since I've seen a scale. I don't drink soda, I don't eat desserts, anything sweet really. But I am a sucker for something greasy and nasty. Still working on the willpower to resist those late night Wendy's cravings. Congrats on what you've done, you're an inspiration.

Those were the hardest, because Baconator. The power is most definitely within you, though. A rule I made with myself was only fruit after dinner. If I want late night satisfaction for my belly, I have to eat an apple, berries, banana, etc. I save gas, and fruit can be digested in about half an hour. That fast food gut bomb is going to sit there while you sleep, digesting oh so slowly, making getting up in the morning that much harder.

Im 25 and wavering at 470, my lower back muscles tire almost instantly when i stand up and walking more than a hundred feet means i have to sit down for a minute or two to allow the muscle spasms to stop and catch my breath, and i was just wondering if you experienced anything similar and if you had an tips on how to keep up the motivation? because it's damned hard to purposefully put myself into that much pain just to do some cardio...

Edit: thanks for all the good advice y'all and kind words /u/SergeantTibbs.

When I first began to lose weight, it was almost entirely financially induced. I made enough money to pay rent and bills, and then the remainder was spent drinking. I had almost nothing left for food, and would live on hotdogs from 7-11. If I hadn't had that experience, I don't know if I would have ever cared to try and save myself. Whatever it is that you are burying within yourself that makes you not care to care about you...let go. You are worth caring for. Every one of us is beautiful, and every one of us is uglier than the sins we commit. It's to be human. Your beauty needs to be your priority. The more I focused on the ugly things I was, or allowed myself to feel I was, the worse my condition became. You're beautiful, and you owe it to yourself to see that.

You are an amazing human. I am a 27/f that has been overweight my entire life. My heaviest was 320. I lost 70 lbs in college, then life hit me like a fuck-ton of bricks. Developed anxiety over said life shit, gained all but about 10 lbs of it back. I have recently started my journey to lose weight. I'm down about 15 lbs in 2 months and I'm starting to feel better, (ie. not getting out of breath from going up a half flight of stairs and my jeans aren't uncomfortable anymore.)... Not sure why I'm telling you this, but I guess I needed to share! thank you for putting yourself out there as an inspiration. Peace and love. :-)

Keep rocking it. Try to find the enjoyable ways to burn calories. Life is an abusive partner, and is always going to try and beat you. Don't be defeated. It sucks, but exercise is truly one of the best ways to get through the toughest times. When life is kicking your ass the hardest, it's up to you to kick your own ass ten times harder.

Overweight lady here. First I want to say your transformation is amazing! I am sure you worked extremely hard to get to where you are today and I commend you. I started gaining weight over five years ago when I was forced to take an early retirement to take care of my mother. She has dementia and can't do anything for herself. I am probably 100 plus pounds overweight right now and am 60 years old. A few months ago I made the decision to get into shape so I joined a gym. Using the muscle strengthening machines wasn't bad and I didn't mind working out on those but doing the cardio was hell. I absolutely hate walking on the treadmill and any other machine like that but I was doing it anyway. Ugh.

I stopped going to the gym. It is very difficult for me to go consistently because my mother goes to adult daycare three times a week and on those days I have to run errands. There are no other times that I can go because there is no one to sit with my mom and no one to help me with her. I know that I can exercise at home so I am not making excuses for not working out. One of my biggest problems is trying to eat right. I don't like to cook and by the time I do things for my mom and her house that we live in, I am too exhausted to start preparing food for myself. (My mom can't eat the same things as I do.) I am also a creature of habit and will eat the same things all the time until I can't stand them any longer so it makes finding tasty foods hard to find.

I know you probably mentioned on here somewhere what you eat. Do you cook for yourself? What sort of meals do you eat?

I read that you lost your mom and I am sorry to know that. Even though my mom is still alive she is no longer here. She doesn't remember anything and all she does is exist. So sad. Keep up the good work and rock that new body!!! P.S., I just saw below that you talk about your calorie intake and your workout routine.

Because I'm still relatively young, and never built lasting relationships, I've limited the number of people I am responsible for, to one. That made my transition much easier to accomplish, simply because I can workout at the 24hr gym whenever my heart desires.

My grandmother (my mother's mother) is in an Alzheimer's care facility, so I know all too well what you're going through, as I see her slip further away every other visit, but because she's in that home, my involvement in her life is to show up and play cribbage from time to time. My mom and uncle had her placed in the facility, and I can only imagine what it must be like to take on that level of care, yourself. I don't have any children, pets, or even houseplants, and I still struggle to stay afloat. Even just a couple twenty minute power walks, and drinking only water, everyday, you will see really solid improvements. I wish you and your mother all the best.

Congratulations on accomplishing such impressive weight loss! I think it's amazing that you took responsibility for your health and your life, and I'm glad that you're reaping the benefits :)

Have you had a doctor examine your heart again now that you've lost the weight? Did you have any permanent damage, or are you back at 100% percent? Also, not to be a downer, but I couldn't help noticing the cigarette in the last picture. Are you a regular smoker, and if so, how do you reconcile that with your history of heart disease? I only ask because I smoked for nine years, and it was easy to pretend there wasn't any damage happening because I couldn't see it (whereas with obesity it's obvious). Not to sound like an obnoxious Puritan, but it would kinda suck to undermine all the progress you've made.

Smoking is a motherfucker. I've moved to spliffs, and because I live in Oregon, I will be able to smoke joints at the bars without fear soon enough. I'm a very social person, and I used to smoke two packs a day in my early twenties. There is no justification for continuing, but it's hard as hell to stop if you like the feeling you get out of it.

Try electronic cigarettes, I smoked two packs a day for ages and I quit instantly... plus you can still put weed in them.

A couple of my friends have gravitated towards those devices. I am already off of 100% tobacco cigarettes, so I know that, one way or t'other, I'm headed in the right direction. The moment I don't worry about the fuzz, it's over with me and that brown leafy mistress.

Also, I have not been back to my cardiologist. I would love to see him, again, though, and I'm sure he would be happy to see at least one of his patients took him seriously.

Wait, so you just stopped taking your medications without following up with your cardiologist? Did you go to your general physician or just one day decided you were going to try and see what happened when you stopped?

I discussed it with my general, and she just wanted me to keep regular check-ups, which I have. So far, zero complications.

Whats with the neck beard?

I still can't grow a mustache. I'm thirty-one, and it's now the reality. I like facial hair. What's a boy to do?

Im 30 and I cant grow hair on my cheeks. The only facial hair I can grow is the Jack Sparrow mustache and chin hair when all I want is a mountain man beard so I guess I can relate.

We work with what we're given.

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No, I have not had that surgery, but, yes, it is needed. The problem I face here is that the surgery is considered to be cosmetic, and is not covered by the health insurance I have. The expense of that type of surgery is not one I can afford.

Someone i knew had bypass surgery years ago and like you couldn't afford to get the excess skin removed. He negotiated with a local burn center to donate his skin and they paid for it's removal. This was years ago and i don't know if that sort of thing still goes on but it's at least worth investigating.

EDIT: I did a quick search and found a place that does such a procedure. Hopefully you can get some help OP.

https://www.mtf.org/

I am going to look into this. I immediately began to well up when I clicked the link. This would be the most amazing thing to happen to me in the entire process. Thank you a thousand times for pointing me in this direction.

Unless you have skin issues under the folds of skin...... Just saying.

They have to cover it if it is to prevent more skin issues. cough, cough

This rash has been bothersome.

First, amazing! Im proud of you.

My insurance will cover the surgery if the patient had bypass surgery. But if the patient did it via lifestyle change alone, nope. It's dumb.

That is actually one of the most enraging things I've ever heard. Oh well...such is life.

Also, thank you. I am glad to be here today.

Mad props man, that's great of you.

How do you feel about HAES?

I believed it until I realized there is no replacement for healthy at healthy. Even when I was at 240 lbs the first time around, I was unhealthy. Healthy reveals itself to you, and once you've lived it, you notice the difference.

Hey buddy, as a guy who has lost weight myself (nowhere near as impressive as you but about over a quarter of my total body weight) I am in awe of how far you made it. Did you ever have times where you reached a significant milestone and then relapsed a little and went back up somewhat? I feel like once I had reached a satisfying milestone I lost all motivation to work out and eat healthily and I can't seem to get back into the swing of it. I haven't put on much since but I wish I could be into it as much as I was before and I'd be interested to hear if you were dedicated the whole way or if you did it periodically. Best of luck!

When I was 23, I had gotten down to about 240 lbs. I was starting to feel confident, and that got me talking to girls. Which led to my first girlfriend. Which lasted for six years, and in that time, I climbed back up to 385 lbs. It's been nearly a year since I left my ex, and so far, my only slip up was summer activity. Once the nice weather arrived, I stopped the gym. My diet has remained firm, but now that winter is nipping at my heals, I am ready to get back into the gym. What you have to remind yourself when getting back into the habit, is how hard it was to get into the habit in the first place. You only need to stick solidly to it for about two weeks, before you no longer need to will yourself into doing it, and you can start to just enjoy doing it.

Yeah I understand, thanks a lot man I appreciate it. I think I'll try and force myself back into it this week and hopefully I'll find my groove again!

YOU CAN DO IT!

Congrats! This is super inspiring.

I'm six foot and hovering around 285, so I really need to lose weight. My question is: how did you fight the sudden, intense cravings? My vice is fried chicken and chicken strips from grocery store delis. If I suddenly develop a hunger for that stuff, what would you recommend I do to curb it?

Again, way to go man. That's amazing.

Man, fried chicken is my lover. What I noticed though, was that it isn't necessarily shit food that is the attraction, so much as it was that someone else was preparing it, which meant quick and easy. Instead of grocery deli fried bullshit, hit your local taqueria for a single chicken taco on corn tortilla. Don't eat two. If you're still hungry, stop at the grocery store on the way home. New rule: produce section, not the deli. You will love yourself for the switch.

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No. My mother had that procedure when I was younger. It worked for her physical course, but the things that she had buried with food were then drowned in alcohol. I'm not perfect, I fuck up plenty, but I could see where I needed to start with the internal struggle, before I could mount the external offensive.

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My heart goes out to you and your mother. It's a struggle I know intimately. Tell her you love her, and if and when she feels like sharing her pain, do your best to take it on. I can't keep wishing I'd have done things differently, but it's a powerful wish nonetheless.

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The problem is losing the fat around my penis. It's still there, and I haven't found an exercise that works that fat away. Sorry to disappoint, but I still have an average sized member.

Exercise doesn't work in that way. Sure you can build up muscles where you exercise, but you can't exercise a certain region to remove fat.

Yeah. I noticed. I still have fat around my genitals, and I've lost a fuck load of weight. When I make my millions, I'll have some lipo done, and call it good.

While there's still fat there, I'm pretty sure you lost it in proportion to the other fat you lost, otherwise, you'd have a big bulge in the pants that was just your pelvic mound fat.

I lost about 60 lbs maybe 2 years ago and only recently realized that my pelvic mound fat decreased after wearing yoga pants recently and realizing my camel toe wasn't as pronounced hahah

I guess I just have a tiny penis, then. Whatever. It still does penisy things.

I seem to recall reading that 35 pounds added half an inch.

I believe it is because of the loss of fat in the groinal area, that would otherwise hide some of it.

It may not even be true though.

I'll tell you one thing, it hasn't gotten any less fun to play with.

Well, how did you do it? Congrats

The most mundane and/or cliche answer that you'll ever hear. Diet and exercise.

How you lost weight? What are you easy tips, for regular guy to lose some weight? Thanks

More than anything, you have to want to make the change. There are no easy roads to weight loss. It takes sacrifice, hard work, and continued dedication. Giving up comfort foods, alcohol and other calorie filled beverages, and not lazing around all day were the only things I changed, but they are the hardest things to give up. Starting it is hard, but once you break through the wall you keep hitting in the first couple of weeks, your body and mind begin to crave the change.

Are you all about the bass or the treble?

The motherfucking bass.

Well done man, impressive! But is there any chance of your old school bowl cut curtains hairstyle returning?

I'm guessing that it was a phase. Never say never.

Hey man. First off congratulations! I've been losing weight and was wondering if you still feel fat after losing a lot of weight as well. I've lost 50 lbs and am now a BMI defined normal weight. But the feeling of being fat hasn't gone away. For example, I'm still scared to pick up a slice of pizza at events because I think everyone will instantly assume its my ninth and judges me. Do these thoughts go away?

So far, not entirely, but the good news is YES!!! The way you think others are judging you is actually just you judging you. Most people aren't going to notice if it's your third pie of the night, because they're lost inside their smart phones. I still see the fat kid in the mirror, and a lot of that does have to do with all of the excess skin, but just under the loose flesh, I see the definition of my muscles, and, "...when I look in the mirror I see sexy ass me." - Brother Ali

What do you like on a sandwich?

I actually don't usually eat sandwiches any longer. Bread is something I don't often have. A sandwich is often times just an unprepared salad, so I try to just prepare the thing.

Did your metabolism undergo any noticeable change? Like were you quick to start sweating when you were heavier but not so much after losing a significant amount?

The increase in stamina and what I could handle from a workout was incredible. I would hate life after the fifteen minute warm up when I first got started. By the end, I was pissy with people if I hadn't been to the gym.

Two part question: one, what advice would you give someone worried about someone else who is on a downward spiral? I am currently really concerned about someone important to me but I really need to be sensitive as I know weight issues for someone who is overweight is a major hot-button and can cause extreme emotional reactions. Two, totally unrelated, did your skin retain elasticity or will you need surgery eventually?

First question: There is no magic button to make someone see the benefit of lifting themselves out of that spiral. I am going through a difficult time with one of my closest friends right now (even as I am doing this, I'm texting back and forth with a girlfriend trying to see what we can do for this guy). He has severe problems with alcoholism. Everything I can think to do, be it something I wish someone had done for me, or things that were done for me that helped, each of these things only push him further into the bottle.

Second. No elasticity. Surgery is (hopefully) on a horizon.

How do you stay motivated when people around you say that you've lost so much weight?

I have lost 80+ pounds over the past year and I am 20 pounds away from my goal. However, I found that I have become complacent over the past month with all the pats in the back I am receiving. Sometimes I just wish that people around me won't say anything about the weight I have lost.

I know that feeling. Just keep pushing. With how good you feel twenty pounds shy of your goal, imagine how much better it will feel to reach it. You're doing great, and you're almost there! Keep up the good work!

Did you stop smoking as well?

I've cut back from over two packs a day, to about a quarter pack a day, and I don't smoke cigarettes, anymore. They are 50/50 blended with marijuana, so I've seriously cut back the amount of tobacco I smoke.

Congrats dude. Your story is somewhat eerie as I had Afib around the same age and am overweight. I'm not nearly as heavy as yourself but I need to lose a fair amount to get into a healthy range. Were you told your weight caused your Afib or were you just adding that to the story? AFAIK and was told the event for me and most younger people is considered to be idiopathic (unrelated to weight with an unknown cause).

I was never told any specific thing caused me to go into AFIB, but my cardiologist was adamant about diet and exercise being of utmost importance. I haven't had any symptoms of AFIB, and I haven't taken my medications since end of March. At the time it happened, I was downing a Costco case of Mountain Dew every few days, and a 12 cup pot of coffee daily. On top of that, no exercise, fast food two meals a day or more, and smoking over a pack a day, my heart was being put through every gauntlet it could possibly face. It's a much happier muscle these days.

Yes, obviously less weight will always be a deciding factor. Did your atria size come back within the normal range? If you had untreated sleep apnea that is also a considering factor in causing AFIB in younger patients. Binge drinking as well---hence Holiday Heart. Did they have you on a Beta Blocker to keep you in sinus rhythm? After my episode they just put me on Metroprolol and an Aspirin regimen. I wound up having to be shocked back into rhythm because it would not go back via the medication. Scary thing to go through at that age.

They warned me I may have to get shocked back into regular rhythm. I was put on Cardizem and Digoxin (heart rate and blood pressure), as well as an Aspirin regimen. For the first few months, I was also on Warfarin. My last ECG came back fine, and my heart has maintained normal sinus rhythm since I came off the meds.

The question I need to know is, did it stop the shaky hands? Also I would not have recognized you, congrats!

DAMMIT!!! No, it did not stop my shaking, but you know me personally, so you should message me privately about how that's the case. Thank you!

I'll be that guy... Is it true what they say about for every X amount of fat you lose you gain Y inches of penis back?

I can see my penis!!! No, the reality is that the size hasn't increased enough to write home to mom about.

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Hahaha!! That's been there for just over nine years, now. Besides my family, it's my life's longest relationship.