iAMa Waffle House Waitress AMA!

http://imgur.com/U0kWfIZ

Why aren't you working?

Ummm.... Why aren't you?.....

Man, I really hope I'm not in trouble for this.

Could I interested you in a Coke Cola? My treat.

Third shifter here who still hasn't gone to sleep. lol

Do you know that we're all stoned?

Do you know we're probably even more stoned?

I'm from the UK and Waffle House is one of my very favourite places in the US. A couple of years ago I wanted to get a souvenir and asked if the coffee mugs were for sale. Our waitress said "sure, 5 bucks" and I gladly bought one. I've always wondered if they really are for sale, or if she was just feeling particularly entrepreneurial that evening? - not that I'm complaining! We left $20 on a $15 check either way.

IS THIS ENOUGH QUESTION MARKS FOR YOU AUTOMODERATOR? ???? ?? ?????? ??????? ???????

Second edit: it seems my phrasing about the tip was off. The check was $15, we left $35 in cash on the table. I gave the waitress $5 in cash directly in exchange for the mug.

Probably entrepreneurial.

I had a lady ask if she could buy our shitty version of A1 steak sauce, I found an unopened one and told her 2 bucks, she gave me a fiver for it then left a 16 dollar tip.

To be fair she was drunk off her ass but still, god I wish she'd come in more often like that.

Used to work at a WH. They're literally 5 bucks. And you have to put it on a separate ticket and stuff it in the drop box.

I guess ours are different, we only sell mugs forreal where it goes to the company is around Christmas time when they have the limited edition ones.

Do you secretly judge people who order a double chocolate chip waffle?

Actually I'm more like "that's it?", even though I do know how filling they are.

My buddies once bet me that if I ate $25 worth of food, they'd pay for all of it. I did it but it was a painful experience. My question is, what is the most you've ever seen anyone eat at Waffle House? I like to think I'm pretty high on the list of food consumed

Probably a double hashbrown double covered with cheese and ham, 16, yes 16 scrambled eggs with cheese and ham and a piece of chicken. No toast though already had his carbs for the day.

What's the secret ingredient that makes everything so damn good?

Liquor probably

Is the blueberry waffle going to come back?

If Waffle House realizes the stupidest thing they've ever done is get rid of them; maybe.

Is everyone really supposed to dance if someone plays Grill Operator on the juke box? I tried it and nothing happened.

No we don't get paid enough lol.

How much would they have to pay you for you to dance whenever the song comes on?

Honestly I'd take a 20 to do the stupid penguin-waddle like dance I already do that my co-workers laugh at.

Are you concerned about the stability of the house, being made of waffles and all?

Nah I feel like we got the upper hand on pancake hut.

How often does someone throw up from being too drunk?

I'd say once or twice a week? Courteous customers make it into the toilets or in the grass. Otherwise it's all over the walls and shitter of the bathroom or in the parking lot for the cooks to clean up.

Do the cooks have to clean up vomit only or do they perform other janitorial duties?

The cooks sweep and clean the parking lot around shift change so when they puke on the pavement that's their job, if they puke in the resturant that's ours.

why can't i get pancakes made from waffle batter?

We have a regular we actually do make pancakes for, but honestly if we were caught doing it we'd be in deep shit.

Americans have a restaurant with nothing but waffles? How do I go about moving to this place?

Haha, we have other stuff too like hash browns and eggs. But to go about moving your best bet would be Atlanta I hear they got one on every corner.

How do you feel about people playing the Waffle House songs on the jukebox?

I'd rather hear "werk werk werk werk werk" on replay for an hour than two minutes of "raaasisins, raaaasins in my toast"

How often do people ask to talk to a manager?

Also, where do you guys get the crack that you put in your coffee?

We run a decent shift so it doesn't regularly happen, hell i'd probably say 3 times a month.

All in the bean baby.

Best thing to order at Waffle House?

Best waffle?

Probably the cheesesteak if I had to recommend anything, best deal though is the all-star since you get a waffle for just .75 ¢ more! What a steal.

It was the crunch berry waffle, blueberry and strawberry mixed together. Until those damn corporate bastards took them both away because of food cost. Which was probably the stupidest thing ever.

Or if you're a regular and know how to eat cheaply, get Originals with no cheese. $1 burger. And a water. Then tip your waitress 100%. $4 meal and once you become a regular the waitresses will give you soda and put a "W" on the ticket.

And after a while the cook has those originals going before you even get in the door when you pull up.

I get mine with toasted buns. Easier for the cook and not greasy and burnt buns.

Oh, and do NOT FUCKING COMPLAIN. If your original is a bit too done, your bun is stale, etc. STFU, you're eating a dollar burger. Get over it.

EDIT: Thanks anonymous Waffle House person. Now when I go to breakfast tomorrow and get my triple over medium sub grits for double toast dry light wheat I will open reddit on my phone and show my people there that I got gilded over a waffle house discussion!!!

This man gets it.

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You can absolutely take a coffee cup that means I have one less cup to wash. If you have a cool waitress/waiter and ask if you can buy one they may just tell you to stick it in your pocket, otherwise just steal it, we may just call you "it's that one guy that took the coffee cup." Lol

I can most certainly say it's probably because of the cooks, it gets hot as shit up on that grill line especially when it's busy and you got a lot of bodies behind the counter.

I even get super hot and sweaty running around, making coffee, setting people up while getting the high bar drinks then having to rush over to take my food out.

I work at a local Italian restaurant and eat there on my off days all the time. Do you ever go to waffle house on your off days just for a meal?

Absolutely because my co-workers are angels that don't charge me even though they're supposed to haha.

I always leave a fat tip though obviously

Edit; I see this is looked down upon, but honestly it's not as if I order out of my means and I always leave enough for the price and then some. If they don't choose to write me a ticket I'm not going to break their arm about it.

I got my first old fashioned in the parking lot of a waffle house. I remember reading an article that wafflehouses have a strange ordering system, based on putting butterpackets and shit on the plates in different areas or something like that. Any credibility to that statement?

Ha, nice man.

But yeah totally, we got a system for how we call out orders and how shit goes out.

Where the jelly is placed dictates how the eggs are cooked, jelly type determines toast, and a whole bunch of other complicated stuff lol

Ok, I'll ask. What's an old fashioned?

Not the right person but I just assumed it was a handy.

Any weird stories about sketchy people that you remember?

Plenty. Most sketchy and recent happened just a few days ago. Some dude stumbled in, went to the men's room, was in there an hour before a cook banged on the door telling him if he wasn't going to eat get the hell out of dodge. After yelling five more minutes the dude left, cook checked back in the restroom, dirty needles and blood everywhere, was not pretty from what I've heard.

Have you ever had to call the police to your Waffle House? What happened that you needed them?

Police have been called 3 times in the time I've worked there, only once were they useful so we don't bother most of the time.

But dude-- deets! Why did you have to call the police in the first place? What went down?

Two punk ass kids drove up next to this old man who collected cans on his bicycle and beat the shit out of him, cook and the other waitress ran out and chased them off while I dialed 911.

What should I never order from you?

I, personally hate making salads because we have no fucking shredded cheese. I mean what kind of fucking shit is that? we have to cut cheese slices, cheese slices for salads.

It actually tastes alright though lol.

Have you ever engaged in sex with a customer in the restaurant?

Strangely no, I've asked my favorite co-workers to join me though.

Aaaaannnd?!

They laugh me off like usual, hurts me to my very soul. :(

Are the steaks frozen or fresh?

Frozen sadly, they still taste good though to me. I'm no food connoisseur however. Bonus; probably everything tastes fresh when you're drunk.

What's your opinion on the hit Waffle house jukebox single "Raisins in my Toast?" And furthermore, what's your opinion of the person who plays it 5 times straight, throws in 1 of Marvin Gaye's "Let's get it on," and then plays "Raisins in my Toast" 5 more times.

I'd rather be cunt-pounded by a steel beam than listen to it.

Everyone there at night is just coming off a party, right? Are there folks who just legit want eggs and bacon while sober?

Actually yes, most people getting off work from warehouses or bartenders themselves. We get occasional sober strippers too.

I know in Texas you're not supposed to smoke in restaurants, but every time I've gone to a Waffle House outside of Dallas (late at night) when someone starts smoking they pull out an ashtray for them.

Does this happen everywhere or is it only in Texas?

I guess only in Texas.

Most people here have common courtesy not to smoke but if they ask if they can; after that whole ordeal with that waitress getting shot in the head over telling some guy not to smoke, we tell 'em "we didn't see nothin'."

Do you get a lot of pick up to go orders?

Ugh yes, I don't like to-go orders that often unless they come in and place it, mostly because answering the phone and THEN being put on hold because they actually didn't know what they wanted before they called backs me up majorly. (even a bigger fuck you to me if theres multiple people in the background wanting something)

Ain't nobody got time for that.

Do you like waffles?

My ten year old self's old password was iwuvvleswaffles.

My ten year old self can go fuck themselves.

Have you ever me Bert, creator of the most decadent chili on this great earth?

No, :(

I don't think anybody in my store has actually met him not even the managers, I'll have to ask the district if I ever get the chance to see him again.

I like your mugs. How much do you care if I just take one with me when I leave?

What mug.

Did they accept your offer?

No. :( I've gotten pretty much everyone I've asked though to see my tits since I got them pierced. That's rewarding.

Ever see a fight break out?

Absolutely.

I've found out bitches can't throw worth shit.

What is the secret to eggs scrambled with cheese?!? They seem so simple, but I try to make them at home and its just a symphony of disappointment.

Probably the mini cast iron skittle we have, all it takes is your eggs, two slices of American cheese and put it in after its melted and stir.

I'm stealing one once I quit.

Favorite way to do hashbrowns? Any secret menu combos people should know about?

Personally I like them well, in the ring, smothered and with worcestershire.

As for secret menu we actually have this pricing chart with a lot of stuff that isn't actually on the menu. Like chicken omelettes, waffle sandwiches, etc

What is the most common order? Is there any secret menu items the public may not know?

All-star definitely because you get the most for your buck.

Like in a earlier comment we have a price chart with stuff that isn't even on the menu but it isn't that much.

Like chicken omelettes, waffle sandwiches, etc

Ate pepper spray for the fun of it, guy said it was a great show got 15 dollars.

Why does it seem like everyone that works at waffle house is missing teeth?

They got in a fight with meth and lost.

What is your average tip percentage? Average sales?

Honestly on a good night I can do 500 by myself in my tiny section, and make 25% back. This is all dependent on what's going on in town, seasons, and how many waitresses there are.

Does your location never have pie too? Chocolate creme pie seems so rare and I've heard employees save most pieces for themselves since it's not always available.

That is severely accurate, haha.

We have one customer we call the pie guy and try to hide a piece of chocolate pie for him.

Best/worst customer experience?

Well, this really drunk lady and her surprisingly sober husband came in one night.

Like she's wobbling in through the front door and we're all like, "Oh boy" she sit's in my section, yay.

Now I'm a pretty laid back person, not aggressive at all and I take things lightly, I get their drinks and she asks if she can hug me, I say, "Yeah of course." She leans over the booth and hugs be, it's alright here but then here's how the rest goes,

"Does this make you uncomfortable?"

"Eh, not really I've had worse." I respond loosening myself from the hug.

"Well I can make you really uncomfortable." Then proceeds to shove her whole tongue into my ear.

Then after is all said and done and I had sanitized my ear and taken their order she starts asking the other waitresses if they want to "Get assaulted" too.

What's the largest tip you have ever gotten? I say this because I got hammered out on town in Kansas City and made my way back to a city in Missouri called belton. I ordered about 30 dollars worth of food for myself and took two bites of food and then left 200 dollars and walked out. It hurt the next morning when I realized what I did but some sassy black lady got a nice tip.

Fifty smackaoonies on Christmas eve, boy was I proud of that sucker, still am. I can only hope I'll get a bigger one than that one day, haha.

Hold up scuse me ma'am, what come on a sausage biscuit?

Me if you're lucky.

Why do I stop getting refills after the check is dropped at the table?

Policy is if you haven't order anything to eat you only get two refills, but if you do get something it's unlimited.

Assuming you did, and it wasn't busy your server was lazy, or I hate to say it shitty. If it was busy, they should've still made rounds to see if you needed one.

Sorry man.

I went to a Waffle House for the first time a year ago and tried to order a beer. My friend and the waitress laughed at me. Is this common? Please comment

Yeah, every time somebody asks for a budlight or rum n' coke, anything I just tell 'em we're out. I still enjoy the joke but I bet I won't the longer I work here haha.

Have any famous celebrities dropped into your Waffle House? If so, how was your encounter with them?

We have one celebrity I guess you'd call him that comes in every once in awhile, his names Dusty he's a rapper I think?

DUSTY THE RAPPER? Holy shit. I have no idea who that is.

Me neither and I wait on him.

Why were you banned from IAma?

No idea but it was pretty much a one time thing so I don't mind, I'll just do back to lurking like usual.

Have you yourself, or any of your customers, actually made a house out of waffles?

No but I made a waffle dick, put it in the fridge and forgot about it and my boss found it. whoops.

What is the strangest thing you've witnessed at waffle house?

Apparently long ago there was a customer that was really good at drawing anime and he jerked himself off under the table to his drawings.

Sex in the work place, what (if anything) goes on?

(I'd like to know all the details........you know, for science!)

If anyone want's to hear the story you'll have to privately PM me for...security reasons, haha.

I heard Waffle House cooks make a very good salary especially in high volume areas +60k a year. Is there any truth to this that you know?

Man I wanna be a cook where they are!

That's not true in my area at all, it's more than minimum wage though so that's good I guess.

How do you feel about this?

http://abc11.com/1198474/

I'm surprised they let him stay in there.

How many teeth do you have? If the answer is > 20, you've got upper management written all over you.

I want my promotion by tomorrow then.

Do you enjoy the song Sturgill Simpson & Steven Colbert did about the awful waffle?

Haven't heard it actually, I know one of my bosses likes it though.

Are you the manager?

Nope, simple waitress lol

I went inside a Waffle House a few days ago and asked the cashier is there's Pokémon inside as a prank. Do you get more people like this?

Not really, me, other co workers and customers talk about the gyms nearby and what we've caught and where though.