Hello, Internet. Yesterday my friend submitted images from my blog to /r/funny, and it quickly became the top thing on the subreddit. It was quite the strange experience having my images seen by over half a million people.

When I posted in there, I got dozens of questions about what it's like being so tall (and so handsome [and so funny] ) as well as about 40 questions on the blog itself, so I figured why not try to inform the public. A lot of you... well a lot of you have some pretty weird questions.

I also decided I need to go to Japan for my blog, and you can help make that a reality. I made a dumb video for it last night. Check it out.

So ask me anything. If the questions I got on Tumblr are any indication of what the questions on here would be like, about half of you are going to ask about my dong.

Other things I can answer questions about - I'm an open-heart surgery patient suffering from Marfan Syndrome, record and produce a podcast with my friends, editor in chief of my campus magazine, used to intern for popular video game website Giant Bomb, and I lost 90 pounds through sheer will (and a hell of a lot of jogging)

Comments: 469 • Responses: 68  • Date: 

me_shell134 karma

This is not a question, but i just really love the picture of you in the bathtub because as a tall girl, my legs often look like that where your knees kind of turn in and your pants expose your ankles.

Also I might be in love with your personality and I want to be your best friend. We can watch space jam and chappelle's show together and I'll help you work on your fear of talking to women.

Bad boy baby, can't stop, won't stop. eh-eh, eh-eh.

Bananaman89167 karma

Marry me.

heti53112 karma

how big is your penis

Bananaman89263 karma

My penis was crafted in a forge in ancient times and has been passed down from generation to generation. If I was to tell you its secrets, it would lose all magic power.

Anusbutthole69 karma

So u have a micropenis?

Bananaman89195 karma

Well microphones are cool right?

dacookeymonsta79 karma

What is it like being the first one to know when it's raining?

Bananaman89186 karma

Pretty good. I act as a tsunami warning beacon as well.

a_silly_monkey76 karma

You should get a pet like a teacup chihuahua. That would be fun.

Bananaman89114 karma

Regular dogs look like that with me.

TheWingnutSquid38 karma

Then what do teacup Chihuahuas look like to you

Bananaman89110 karma

It's like what an amoeba looks like to you.

maybe-me68 karma

Congrats on your weight loss! You look great now :)

Bananaman89124 karma

Thanks, you look great too!

poliscinerd67 karma

Can I borrow you to reach tall things for me? (I'm 5'3" :( )

Edit: Aw man, someone asked a similar question ten minutes ago. Creativity fail. Anyway your tumblr cracks me up and I have nothing clever to say.

Bananaman8994 karma

I still like you.

Paladin_Solo60 karma

does your height make getting a girlfriend difficult?

Bananaman89534 karma

No, but my crippling fear of talking to women does.

seanacain56 karma

What's the thing you enjoy the most about being you?

Bananaman89131 karma

Probably the height.

thewingedwheel54 karma

If you slipped on a banana, how long would it take you to reach the earth when falling?

What about if you were in a vaccuum of space (gravity still being a factor)?

Bananaman89104 karma

Nice try Dr. Paulson, my physics teacher.

MagnusTheGreat48 karma

Can I call you Ben '10?

Bananaman8942 karma


honeybadga44 karma

Fuck, marry, kill: Patrick Swayze Gary Busey and Dog the bounty hunter

Bananaman89134 karma

GREAT question.

Marry Swayze. I mean, he's hands down the most romantic of the bunch. Fuck Busey, because if that man is as crazy in bed as he is in life, then that'd be one hell of a night. Kill Dog. Though I'm not sure it's possible, I would find a way. I would probably just commit a few crimes to lure him out of Hawaii so we can fight on my turf. Hear that Dog? I'm comin' for ya.

YourFaceIsThePlace42 karma

Dear Ben the Giant -- I just want you to know that I am living in Japan, and also dating a very tall Ben, who clocks in at 6 foot 4 inches. If you happen to come to the Kansai area instead of Tokyo (which you should, because Osaka and Kyoto are ballin'... I also love Nagoya, but nobody else does), there should be a meeting of the Bens. I figure two things will happen: a) the two of you standing together will cause 4 old ladies to keel over and die of shock, or b) you'll have to fight each other, Highlander-style, and I have to marry the victor or something. THINK ABOUT IT.

Bananaman894 karma

Hey! I wanted to respond to this. I will check it out for sure. I've saved this in a google doc with all of my Japan stuff so I might hit you guys up :)

I_peed_in_the_pool41 karma

Can you get the applejacks off the top shelf for me? I'm petite and hungry.

Bananaman8985 karma

Sure as long as we can share a bowl of them Applejacks are dope.

Anusbutthole41 karma

Dam you got 3 inches on me. What height would you consider short?

Bananaman89159 karma

2 feet tall would be pretty short.

puffmello40 karma

Do you have a really long bed?

Bananaman89174 karma

The greatest tragedy of our time is the fact that I sleep on a twin mattress.


Do you ever wish you were shorter?

Bananaman89231 karma

No, in fact I wish I was a little bit taller I wish I was a baller I...

zxrax72 karma

Why can't celebrities do AMAs this good?

Bananaman89364 karma

Because I'm not a publicist.

groovybanana7434 karma

How many people have you met in real life who are taller than you?

Bananaman89238 karma

Just one. He isn't taller than me anymore because he's dead.

Truedigs31 karma

Being a tall guy my self at 6'3 should I still consider myself a tall guy?

Bananaman89120 karma

Tall is a state of mind. Be tall in spirit and in pride, and you can do anything. Also yeah 6'3'' is pretty tall.

theramennoodle43 karma

If I dream hard enough can I be as tall as the stars?

Bananaman89139 karma

No that's silly.

HossSaad30 karma

Are you attracted to taller women or shorter women? I've always known really tall guys to dig really short girls and never understood why...it looks painful to bend that far to give them a hug!

Bananaman8993 karma

I like girls who.

Staravia49230 karma

What is your favourite type of bird?

Bananaman89200 karma

Big Bird

Twice_Knightley28 karma

I'm 6 foot 9. In canada we consider this 'average' height, with people that are taller being 'above average' and people that are shorter being 'pathetic' or 'sub-human'.

Is this not the international standard?

Bananaman8948 karma

I should move to Canada.

emmawentworth27 karma

Is it hard for you to fly, and do you have to fly first class? One of my brothers is 6'3" and he hitches about it every time.

Bananaman8983 karma

Have you ever seen that episode of the Twilight Zone where there's a little monster on the wing? That's me, irl. I sit out there because there's plenty of room.

Also some suggest flying in the emergency exit row, because there is more room, but I don't want to be responsible if shit hits the fan.

drewzybby26 karma

Can you dunk?

Bananaman8995 karma

I can, but I have to be careful not to chaos dunk. We don't want a repeat of what happened in New York.

TheChuckBartowski24 karma

Bat or knife?

Bananaman8942 karma


TheChuckBartowski18 karma

You with a bat would be terrifying.

If you were be a comic book villain what would your power be. Besides being tall/bat wielding that is

Bananaman8943 karma

The power to get unlimited powers. That's genie 101, man!

ministryofsound24 karma

is there anything you can say to me that will make me feel good about myself

Bananaman8991 karma

You're not dead!

drlemon23 karma

Why don't you have a travel show? Seriously, i'd watch that.

Bananaman8935 karma

Well a travel blog would be a neat place to start with that.

drlemon5 karma

Well, i'd subscribe. Travel the world! Struggle to fit on airplanes! Hit your head on things! It's a fun filled romp through exotic places!

Bananaman8912 karma

Thanks, Dr. Lemon. Where did you go to med school?

TheGr8Drambeeni20 karma

Hey two questions:

  1. Have you ever met anyone as tall as you?

  2. If you could have sex with any women that ever lived, who would it be?

Bananaman8950 karma

1) I went to a basketball game once, there were a couple there. 2) Amelia Earhart, for reasons that I will never divulge.

thewingedwheel12 karma

Is it because you enjoy necrophelia?

Bananaman8969 karma

Look man she still might be alive they never found her.

Flixxi19 karma

Can I call you Benji?

Bananaman89122 karma

Only if I can call you Benji as well. It would get real confusing real fast and we would just stop calling each other that.

ShogunAlex19 karma

Are you going to Japan permanently? or a holiday?

Bananaman8927 karma

The goal is to go there and shoot for a week, and produce 70 posts. More info can be found http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=BCxgNkBZ5E8 here

melissalee018 karma

Hi Ben. I hope you're having a nice Saturday so far. Would you tell me a little about your open-heart surgery? Are you being treated with losartan for Marfan?

Bananaman8936 karma

Sure. I had my aeortic valve replaced with a mechanical one, and my root was 3x the size it should have been so they cut that down. I take coumadin and metropolol to help with the synthetic valve.

LobsterTache17 karma

Could you beat Richard Osman in a fight?

Bananaman8949 karma

I don't know who that is, so yes.

LitAFartOnce17 karma

Do you ever fuck with strangers while wearing that patent-pending expression?

Bananaman89102 karma

I am already an intimidating guy, so I sometimes like to just follow people around, you know, into dark alleys for fun. And when I'm there, in a totally joking way, I'll tell them to give me all of their money and run away.

FlyingFortress1717 karma

Can you fit in most vehicles?

Bananaman8982 karma

I can squeeze my way into passenger seats, but I don't drive because steering wheels get in the way of my knees. I will address the manufactures of Toyota directly if I make my way to Japan. They will pay for their crimes.

Skateallday10116 karma

Do you like Chinese food? The American kind.

Bananaman8926 karma

Yes especially when it has pineapples in it.

UlyssesTheSloth14 karma

What's the biggest animal you could take, one on one?

Bananaman8945 karma

Dog the Bounty Hunter

ColonelCrabcake14 karma

Where do you find clothes? You've got a few inches on me, and I'm hard pressed to find anything that fits...

Bananaman8956 karma

I fashion my own clothes from the hide of large bests.

And I shop online. Old Navy has a really good selection.


What's the worst thing about being tall? I'm pretty average height, so make me feel good about myself.

Bananaman8962 karma

Well my hand hurts a lot from people constantly high-fiving me for being so tall.

zxrax21 karma

can anyone actually give you a high five?

Bananaman89137 karma

I once high-fived Shaq but we both broke our hands that's why he could never shoot free throws.

ds8k14 karma

You're the reason I wanted to intern at Giant Bomb. I'm sad I may never meet you, but stalking you on Twitter helps.

Is Kessler ever moving back to SF?

Bananaman8913 karma

We hope so!

Chafuter13 karma

What is Marfan?

Bananaman8969 karma

Marfan Syndrome is a disease of the connective tissue that effects mostly tall people. Other people who had it were Lincoln (cool) and Osama Bin Laden (not as cool).

Sharzona11 karma

Where are you going in Japan? And make sure to try Takoyaki (octopus dumplings) you won't regret it.

Bananaman8916 karma

I want to go all over. I would start in Tokyo and travel about. I will try that because octopus dumplings sound amazing.

ZorroArtico11 karma

What size show do you have? And do you struggle to find things that fit (like shoes/clothes)? And do you have to get some things custom made so that they're easier to use (for example, a bigger desk at school? I can imagine it was difficult to fit those legs underneath, because I barely can at school, and I'm only 5'9!)

Bananaman8917 karma

I got really good at writing on my knees due to small desks. I find my shoes at specialty stores or online.

haveeeyoumetted11 karma

I was about to suggest you do an AMA so I'd like to believe I'm magic.

What kind of car do you drive? The photo of you looking like you were in a clown car amuses me greatly.

EDIT: someone already asked. Damn. Either way you're fantastic and my modified question is when did you start getting so damn tall?

EDIT #2: the more I scroll the more every question I think of is asked. What are the biggest problems you have being tall?

Bananaman8948 karma

I walk. It's only a few steps to get to anywhere I need to in California.

John235711 karma

Have you always been way taller than everyone else your age, or did you have a sudden growth spurt at some point?

Bananaman8973 karma

I was always a little taller than everyone, then I grew to 6'10'' in the 7th grade. It was horrible for everyone involved.

John235722 karma

Wow, being 6"10 as an adult must be weird enough, at age 13 it must have been crazy...

Bananaman89111 karma

I actually grew more than that, and shrunk down to what I am now. They call me Benjamin Button, but that's mostly because I'm really boring.

something38750873509 karma

What's the greatest advantage of tallness?

And the greatest disadvantage?

Bananaman8928 karma

Same answer for both: standing out in crows.

ColonelCrabcake9 karma

Favorite Rapper, GO.

Bananaman8947 karma

Dylon. He spits hot fire.

shabazz1238 karma

I'm sorry for asking but, did you play basketball?

Bananaman8939 karma

No but I'll still take you 1 on 1 on the courts pass me the rock coach I'm ready to go

Jorbear8 karma

Jeff or Juice?

Bananaman8930 karma

Trick question. Gin and Juice.

IEatCocoPuffs8 karma

When did you stop growing? And were you this tall in highschool?

Bananaman8916 karma

I stopped my self from growing when I was at 6'10'' which was right after highschool.

Jeffsekai8 karma

How do you feel about Lil B?

Bananaman8916 karma

I love Lil B and his messages of positivity. I've always been a fan of staying positive, and so is Lil B. That's why I enjoy him.

CommenceJigglin7 karma

Hulk or Andre the Giant?

Bananaman8916 karma

Hogan is a real American hero but, come on.

chimpanzeethatt7 karma

...Whats the weather like up there?...

I'm sorry.

Bananaman8929 karma

Cold now, thanks.

heriman3 karma

if you had to choose to be a manga ka or a baka gaijin desu what would you be?

Bananaman897 karma

Neither. I want to be Kawaii Gaijin

fortune62 karma

I bet you're pretty sick at hoops. 1v1 me?

Bananaman899 karma

Sure, but I only race for pinks, if you know what I mean.

[deleted]1 karma


Bananaman8910 karma

Only if you're down with walking down the isle to the Space Jam theme.

beautifulbitterfruit4 karma

Every one of your responses makes me wish I could hang out with you 24/7.

Bananaman8910 karma

Thanks man let's hang out and drink some brews and catch up on this season of Top Chef

beautifulbitterfruit3 karma

That would be perfect. Also Top Chef Canada, if you're feeling kinky.

Bananaman899 karma

Down. Do they make fancy poutines?