Comments: 320 • Responses: 57  • Date: 

Tastygroove61 karma

Husbands.. Don't let your wife get a tubal... Tubal ligation syndrome... Its bad. Vasectomy is quick, near painless, no life-destroying side effects your doctor will never bother to tell you about. (Because acknowledgement equals liability, I guess..)

narcissist_clyde48 karma

I agree with this 100%, my girlfriend mentioned getting sterilized but I disagreed because it's so much more dangerous for women.

COPYstamp46 karma

My husband had a vasectomy two years ago. Super easy, no issues.

However, I'm currently feeding our month-old baby as I type this. Be careful!

narcissist_clyde24 karma

That happened to my brother, he got a vasectomy but never went back for his check-up. That was 10 years and 7 kids ago. I'm definitely going in for both follow-ups.

elRinbo8 karma

Lol wut??? He didn't go in for his check up after the first kid?

narcissist_clyde40 karma

Yeah, he's what some people would call "mentally retarded", haha. He's not really retarded, just an asshole.

poonchinello32 karma

Speaking from experience.

  1. Check for holes in the frozen bag of veggies. My junk smelled like corn for a day.

  2. Wait at least a week to masturbate and maybe a couple of days more to have sex.

  3. I found that the twins were hanging lower than usual for several months after and that support was needed when exercising.

  4. Don't play with the clamps. Just leave them alone.

  5. And finally, you're going to want to wait at least a week before attempting to play the bagpipes.

narcissist_clyde14 karma

Very sound advice, thanks!

ScaredKitty25 karma

Woah you are getting downvoted to fuck. Someone really disapproves of you having control over your fertility.

narcissist_clyde33 karma

I know, right!? I'm pretty surprised that people view my sterilization as a bad thing, they'd upvote the shit out of this thread if they met me.

yumenohikari3 karma

I think it has more to do with post-vasectomy AMAs being pretty common. Honestly, as one of the snipped I'm all for seeing these posts pretty often, the better to get it through to some of the guys who haven't figured out yet that it still hurts a hell of a lot less than childbirth or major abdominal surgery, and costs a hell of a lot less than either as well.

ScaredKitty2 karma

That would make sense if it was just downvotes on the topic, but people were going through the comments and downvoting everything he said. It was more obvious at the time of me commenting, he's been pulled out of the negative numbers now.

narcissist_clyde2 karma

Yeah, I tend to have that effect on people, I'm not the easiest guy to agree with, haha.

corpse_rape18 karma

My husband had one when he was 28. We are also childless. People are always shocked when they find out, but I can't imagine bringing a child into the world. We are too damn selfish.

Tip from my guy: walk sideways today. ;P

narcissist_clyde9 karma

People have grown accustomed to my anti-natalist rambling, so most of my friends just asked why I didn't do it sooner.

And the pain has subsided considerably since yesterday, I was surprised to be able to walk almost normally this morning.

corpse_rape4 karma

It's awesome to meet a fellow non-breeder. Congrats, man. It's totally worth it.

narcissist_clyde10 karma

Thanks, I've never felt better about a decision in my life.

eqo31416 karma

How has no one posted the craigslist story about the vasectomy?


narcissist_clyde10 karma

That was brilliant!

funkadilious12 karma

Welcome brother! Enjoy freedom!

narcissist_clyde18 karma

Thank you, I'm so stoked to have the huge burden of accidental pregnancy lifted from me.

pikchertaker12 karma

No questions, just wanted to say that I'm jealous!

I'm a woman (almost 26) and have wanted to get my tubes tied for as long as I can remember, but when I have brought it up to my GP, she says that I'm still young and I'll change my mind. I hate it when people are always telling me that I'll change my mind.

narcissist_clyde15 karma

It really bums me out that doctors are so certain that women can't make their own decisions about procreation. I would suggest going straight to a specialist, if you find the right one, you may not need a referral.

michellesabrina11 karma


narcissist_clyde10 karma

Any bad side effects are fairly rare, and the procedures for vasectomies are vastly improved from even 10 years ago. I'd say that if his insurance covers it, it's a very practical option.

And I agree that gender plays such a huge role in personal decisions regarding birth. It's very unfortunate, but women also face a much bigger risk of complications through tubal ligation.

michellesabrina2 karma


narcissist_clyde6 karma

I realize that being a guy made it a lot easier to make this happen, but seriously, all I did was call a urologist and schedule the procedure. I would suggest maybe just calling around to see if anyone would be willing to help you out. There's got to be a few doctors out there who realize that women have equal rights.

mortiphago11 karma

just wanted to tell ya, OP, that I'm sorry you're getting downvoted by the pro-lifers and sanctity-of-marriage dumbasses.

on a second note, i'm just one year your junior and yet you've already been married, been party to 2 abortions, divorced, and now got a life-mate and a vasectomy. Either my life is way duller than the norm, or yours is way more event-filled.

narcissist_clyde9 karma

Thank you for your support, but all the shit I went through to get to this point in my life never really made me think it was "event-filled". I've just made a lot of reckless choices, haha. I'm glad I finally pulled my head out of my ass.

precordial_thump9 karma

What's your relationship status?

Do you have children already?

How bad is the pain?

narcissist_clyde32 karma

I live with my life-mate, we've decided that boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't really convey the ferocious radassness we possess, haha.

I don't have any children, but have been party to 2 abortions. I'm really not into kids.

The pain yesterday was pretty intense. It felt like a really bad case of blue balls. I had an icepack on my groin for most of the day, but had plenty of weed and beer to dull the pain.

EDIT: dumb grammar

emvy9 karma


narcissist_clyde10 karma

Yeah, the pain wasn't quite that bad, haha.

dkom3117 karma

your body your choice. kudos for ending all possibility of having unwanted children. more people should have the ....balls (YEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH)

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Well played, sir!

Disorted7 karma

Did you have trouble finding a doctor to perform the procedure? Were you covered by insurance or did you pay out of pocket?

narcissist_clyde11 karma

I actually just googled for urologists in my area, and went with the guy who had the best reviews. I then called and set up my appointment, it was really easy. My insurance covered most of it, I don't know how much I'll have to pay out of pocket until they send me the bill though.

shiv4m6 karma

Can you explain it in detail on how the procedure is done? And do you have a hole under your man part?

narcissist_clyde29 karma

Yes, the doctor walked me through it as he went.

So I got set up on the bed, he told me to lay back and then he did a quick check on the bottom of my scrotum to gather the vasa deferentia. He gave me a shot of anesthetic at the incision site, and off we went!

A small incision was made, he then used (what was essentially) a small crochet hook to pull out my left vas, and used a shot of anesthetic to numb the tube. I didn't even feel him pulling the tubes out, which was a huge relief. He then cut it and applied clips (I believe they were clips, he didn't specify) to each end, and shoved it back into my scrotum.

He then repeated on my right vas. He was very sure to warn me about what each sensation would feel like, which helped my anxiety greatly. When he snipped the vas deferentia, it basically felt like someone had flicked my nuts, a very tense, but dull ache.

After he put the right vas back in, he instructed me to pinch a piece of gauze over the incision for 5 minutes. Afterwards, the nurse came in with my antibiotics prescription and 2 specimen cups for my samples in 6 weeks and 8 weeks. I got dressed, thanked the nurse and receptionist, and then went on my way.

The procedure itself took less than 10 minutes, and was relatively painless. And yes, I now have a very small incision, about 1/8th of an inch, on my scrotum, which he said should be healed up within a week.

iamcarlgauss52 karma

God, I have never cringed so much reading anything in my life.

narcissist_clyde9 karma

You're welcome, haha.

Avium9 karma

Much nicer description than when I had mine done. My doc described it as follows:

"First we shoot you in the testicles with a pellet gun." Needle-less anaesthetic gun works like the old fashions single pump pellet guns.

"Then I'm going to poke a hole with some needle-nose pliers. Pull the one tube out, clamp down with some vise-grips and burn it with a soldering iron." I'm sorry. What?

"Then we repeat on the other side."

narcissist_clyde11 karma

That's fucking brutal. I really lucked out with my doctor, because I had initially imagined a psychopath with scissors and a crochet hook attacking me.

Apex-Nebula2 karma

why are all your posts being downvoted so much?

narcissist_clyde11 karma

Not quite sure, don't really care though. I just figured this would be good information for anyone that's looking into getting sterilized.

CoastieThaMostie3 karma

When he snipped the vas deferentia, it basically felt like someone had flicked my nuts, a very tense, but dull ache.

When I got mine done, it felt like someone to a sledgehammer to my balls. He gave me a little more anesthetic, and I was fine, but BOY that first vas hurt like a mother.

I really wish I wouldn't have had it done honestly. I did it to (attempt) to make things better with my now ex-wife. I've met an amazing girl and she wants kids. I don't know if I'll ever be able to do that, obviously.

narcissist_clyde6 karma

That's a bummer, I'm very fortunate to have a comprehensive understanding of my view on the world, and I'm completely confident that this was a great decision. Hopefully you can at least show this new girl an amazing enough time that she'll be comfortable with your situation, best of luck.

gobbo2 karma

I got the titanium tube-clips too, but the doctor didn't even make an incision, just a hole that he then widened for the procedure. When he was done 15 minutes later, the holes just closed on their own, invisible and bloodless... Like magic!

The whole thing was bizarrely easy, and I got to milk the sympathy / hero trip for two weeks.

V for victory!

narcissist_clyde4 karma

I got to play cripple at band practice tonight, it was pretty awesome. Everytime I needed a beer or we needed to adjust levels, the drummer did it for me, haha.

tedesco4551 karma

So no prescription pain medicine for recovery?

narcissist_clyde14 karma

Nope, the aftercare paperwork just said to take what I usually take for pain, which I consider my doctor telling me to get high and drink some beer.

ImAwesomeThanks6 karma

Hi, thanks for doing this AMA.

My questions to actually pretty simple, there's three of them:

  • Why did you choose to have the procedure?
  • Do you have kids?
  • Is it reversable?

Looking forward to hearing from you.

narcissist_clyde21 karma

I chose to get a vasectomy because I have never felt like procreating was a decision I could be comfortable with. I've always been pretty misanthropic, and getting to have consequence free sex is way too awesome of an opportunity to pass up.

Yablan6 karma


narcissist_clyde6 karma

Unless you get it in their eye, I'm pretty sure that's painful whether or not you're shooting blanks, haha.

I actually only had 1 appointment. I called to schedule a consultation last month but the receptionist said it wasn't necessary and just scheduled the operation. I was happy to find a urologist that was as gung-ho about sterilization as me.

Yablan3 karma


narcissist_clyde6 karma

It is, but in 8 weeks I'll have my final results, and I'll never have to worry about it again.

PixelOrange2 karma

That's not entirely true. You need to get periodic checkups. You're not supposed to have to, but they can grow back...

I think I'm going to get a checkup once every 7 years or so. Just to be safe.

narcissist_clyde2 karma

I hadn't heard about that, I'll be sure to ask the doctor how often I need to go back. Thanks.

TheTogfather4 karma

Just want to say thanks for posting this. I go in for my snip next Friday, you helped answer some lingering questions.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Glad I could help, and congrats on your decision.

narcissist_clyde4 karma

To my surprise, there are people who want to start a philosophical debate over my decision to prevent, in what capacity I can, the propagation of unwanted and un-cared for children. My response is a song I wrote about my day to day life, and I think it sums up everything I don't want another person to have to experience against their own will.

man... I'm a fuckin' bummer...

50MillionChickens3 karma

I have no judgment about your call on this, your body, your choice; but you seem happy about so congrats. I'm curious that you mentioned wanting to do this since you were 16. What led you to be convinced so early that you were not going to experience kids? Was it totally political? What was your childhood like?

narcissist_clyde6 karma

I had a pretty confusing childhood, many siblings, but none of which were full blood relatives. My father is on his 6th wife, 4 kids from the first 3 wives, and unfortunately the step-mother that raised me was pretty unbalanced. I became very misanthropic at a very young age, and realized around 7 years old that I didn't really feel a connection to other people. I've done enough babysitting for my brother to know that I can't handle children, I don't understand them and I resent that they can't take care of themselves. It's become very apparent over the last decade that I don't have the selfless qualities required of a loving, attentive parent, and I have never had any good parental role models. So yeah, that should sum it up, haha.

jagarr2 karma

funny! I am the opposite, yet the same. =P I have a very awesome and loving immediate family that I'm fortunately very close with, but I DO NOT WANT KIDS. I am 28 and by 30, want to be snipped. Going to give myself two more years of pondering though and I am not getting laid a terrible amount at the moment so, no biggy. I think I can hold out another dos yearos without slippin' up.

My only regret is that my parents desperately want grand-children, but I've already told them no. I've seriously considered the kids route solely to make them happy, but that would be nuts. Hopefully my lil bro will knock his long-time girl up eventually and give my poor parents some tiny babies to spoil. They love that shit. My dad is great with kids.

but i'm low-debt with a house of my own and a brand new vehicle lease with only 2 seats in it. i like ganj (daily) and beers as well and i know that i am not going to be the incredible parent my dad was. it just isn't in me. no philo reason for not having kids here... i just want my freedom!!

great AMA btw, thanks and good luck with your recovery and your bodacious life-mate:)

narcissist_clyde4 karma

It's good to hear that you're doing well for yourself while still being conscientious about your reproduction. I do fairly well myself, all things considered, and seeing what my life mate has to go through with the kids really solidified my decision. If I ever had to turn down a beer or a bowl because I had to take care of children, I would be devastated, haha. Thanks for your support, best of luck when you get your operation!

Fallen_Milkman3 karma

Hopefully yours went as well as mine...

I had mine done 2 years ago. It was the "scalpel-less" procedure. The basically numb your sack, use scissors to make a tiny incision (< 1cm), snip off a piece of the vas on each side and cauterize the ends of the tubes, push everything back in and put a tiny circle band-aid over it.

Took all of 15 minutes. It took me longer to clean all the iodine off my balls than it did to have it done.

I wore boxer-briefs for a week after as recommended and didn't lift anything over 40lbs for a few weeks. Only used ice on the first day w/ Tylenol for any discomfort.

There really wasn't any pain. If you remember blue balls when you were 13, it's about the same though it lasts for a few days.

I rubbed one out 2 days later (had to make sure it worked, you know?) and my wife and I were back at it in 3.

Best $800 I ever spent.

narcissist_clyde4 karma

So far, so good. I'm feeling pretty solid, just a slight limp and a little pain.

liquidshadowman3 karma

What did the doctor tell you about the possibility of diminished testosterone and sexual desire or is this just a myth?

narcissist_clyde13 karma

The Vasa deferentia simply deliver the sperm into the semen. Blocking them doesn't affect hormone levels or sexual desire.

teh_spazz1 karma

It's deferens. Vas deferens.

narcissist_clyde2 karma

But individually they are deferentia, I should have used deferens in that context, but I'm not entirely wrong, haha

LuckJury3 karma

It's actually the other way around. Individually, vas deferens. Plural, vasa deferentia. See the first line of the wiki.

narcissist_clyde6 karma

I was mistaken then. Thank you for the correction.

ungabungayabbadabba2 karma


narcissist_clyde2 karma

Thanks a lot, man. It's good to know that quite a few of us still hold hope for personal rights and free will. As for the naysayers, I just don't understand why they would think less neglected children is a bad thing.

iamahipcat2 karma

Just thinking about having them snipped is making me cringe and reading some of the comments about what to do right after to stay healthy or whatever is just making me cry. My question for you is how much does it hurt?

narcissist_clyde2 karma

At this point it doesn't hurt that bad at all, just a slight dull ache.

kokain7112 karma

  1. How bloody was the op?
  2. How long before you can resume sex?
  3. Would you recommend it anyone else?

narcissist_clyde10 karma

It wasn't terribly bloody, but I got a really good anecdote out of it. So after my 5 minutes of pinching the incision with the gauze, the nurse came in to check on me. She said "looks like it headed south", which confused me until I looked down, and discovered that I had gotten my first period! There was a small stream of blood that had gone down my sack and pooled around my right leg, it was pretty gross.

I'll have to re-read the aftercare paperwork, but I'm pretty sure I should be able to have sex in 1 week.

I would certainly recommend this procedure, I've been trying to convince my best friend to get this since I scheduled mine.

BillCosbysForeskin4 karma

Why would you care if your best friend gets a vasectomy?

narcissist_clyde4 karma

Because he's the drummer in my band, and we're all about solidarity, haha. Also, he has a kid and he tries, but isn't the greatest father.

yumenohikari2 karma

Congratulations. That ache you feel right now, that's the incredibly low price of a truly amazing freedom. Enjoy it when it arrives.

As for the rest of Reddit, well, you're the one who had the ... well, balls to go through with it. Too many of the rest still make up the chorus of NOPE NOPE NOPE every time one of these AMAs or the 10-year birth control thing gets posted.

narcissist_clyde2 karma

Thanks for the support.

Ih8Hondas1 karma

Are there places that will give you general anesthesia for a vasectomy? I'm only 21, but I'm considering it for sometime in the future. I hate needles, so the thought of a shot in the sack while conscious turns my stomach.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Just don't look and you'll be fine.

Ih8Hondas1 karma

I'm pretty sure I would scream like a little bitch and back the fuck up and the doc would end up having to do it a second time, which would suck even worse.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Haha, my doctor actually commented on how calm I was, so I just told him the ribcage tattoo I got last week was far worse.

SmurfUnunoctium1 karma

I know someone who had this done after having kids. Is it really only a 50% success rate for reversing it? Because you get 2 tries at reversing it and 50% success rate per try is 75% overall. If it is 50% overall that's more like 30% per try. (You can correct my math but this is a rough estimate.)


narcissist_clyde4 karma

The literature I read gave an average reversal success rate of 50%. When the sperm initially reabsorbs your immune system creates sperm anti-bodies, which make it difficult to reproduce even with a reversal.

vawksel1 karma

So does this mean there is always a perpetual load on your immune system since it's constantly fighting an "infection" for the rest of your life?

narcissist_clyde3 karma

I suppose so, I hadn't really thought about that.

tenderlumpling1 karma

Jealous. I'm a woman who can't find a good doctor to sterilize me (not that I have insurance or can afford it atm, but when the time comes....). But it pleases me to know that guys around my age might be up for sterilization. That's a relief.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Just hang out with punk bands, anti-natalists run rampant at house shows, and we're generally pretty nice people too.

toritxtornado1 karma

My boyfriend (29) had a vasectomy a couple years ago before he met me. We both want children together in the future, so he will have to get it reversed. Do you know of any stories about men that have had them reversed?

narcissist_clyde3 karma

No, I haven't talked to anyone that tried to have it reversed.

brandoshido1 karma

welcome to the club! If your doc told you to wait two weeks before playing sports again, wait longer. I started after two weeks and my junk swelled up like you wouldn't believe.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

That sucks, because it just started getting nice out and I wanted to skate next week. Guess I'll wait :(

sephstorm1 karma

do you still cum?

narcissist_clyde5 karma

I haven't ejaculated yet, but yes, I will still "cum".

GracefulNarwhal1 karma


ehsgeek1 karma

If it was yesterday morning, it's highly unlikely he's had an opportunity yet.

narcissist_clyde10 karma

Yeah, not going to try that until tonight or tomorrow at the soonest.

vawksel1 karma

I read that your ejaculate won't change color, but I always thought that the "white" stuff WAS the sperm, and if you got a vasectomy, then your ejaculate would be clear.

Did your doctor say anything about this?

narcissist_clyde2 karma

No, but I was asked about this earlier today. I'll be sure to issue a full report as soon as I get off.

gururyan1 karma


narcissist_clyde9 karma

I haven't tried it yet, but I'll be sure to update this when I do so you can all hear about my jizz.

Arryreddit1 karma

At the risk of sounding very dumb, where does all the sperm go? And does it feel different to ejaculate?

narcissist_clyde5 karma

I haven't ejaculated yet, but I'll update when I do. And the sperm is absorbed by the body.

Hmbsoc1 karma


narcissist_clyde5 karma

I'm sorry to hear about your friend, that's precisely why vasectomies are the safer and more logical sterilization method. It sucks that her surgeon was negligent enough to leave an instrument in her.

Thank you though, and I'm in a fiercely commited relationship, I don't have any kids, but she does.

UltimaGabe1 karma

Wow. It looks like you and I had vasectomies on the same day. I posted in r/casualiama, and got considerably less response than you did.

narcissist_clyde3 karma

Haha, congratulations, man! I think this makes us nut brothers.

tedesco4551 karma

So you didn't get any prescription pain killers for your recovery?

narcissist_clyde5 karma

No, they offered, but I don't really do pills.