Howdy Reddit, I'm the one and only Real Cat Lawyer. As many of y'all may know, I struggled to remove a cat filter during a court hearing on Feb 9th. I'm here because while I'm glad to provide the world a bit of joy, I'm hopeful we can help raise money for my niece's nonprofit, Firefly Fund, which funds and supports the research and education necessary to accelerate a cure for rare neurodegenerative genetic diseases that affect children and currently have no cure. Read more here.. The Firefly Fund is currently selling cat lawyer t-shirts through which all proceeds flow to their fund. You can find the t-shirt on the Real Cat Lawyer website by clicking on the Firefly Fund T-Shirt link.

Throughout the coming week we hope to do some giveaways through social media challenges. You can find us on all the socials here:

I'm here live, I'm not a cat, and I'm prepared to go forward with this Reddit, fire away!


edit: Hey Reddit I've been having fun, I've got to go run some errands but I'll be jumping in and out to answer questions all day long!

edit 2: 4:18 update - I'm not having to busy of an evening and still will be around to answer more questions, would love to see more memes!

edit 3: 6:40 update - I've been enjoying all of your comments and it's amazing to see how you Redditors are such good researchers, I didn't think someone would recognize me from the Netflix Series, The Confession Killer,

edit 4: 8:15 update - WOW REDDIT! I didn't imagine I'd talk to so many people, so nice hearing all your stories and knowing so many people enjoyed the video and watched it over and over again. If you wanna share the Original Full Video it's right here!

edit 5: 10:15 I can't believe it, feels like the buzz just keeps picking up as the day ends!

edit 6: 11:42 Still going strong! Texas Strong!

edit 7: 12:15 Alrighty Reddit, I'm signing off for the night, I'm one cooked kitty. I'll see you early in the morning, I'm gonna get some good pictures of Tabby to share and be back to answer some more of your questions. Please remember to check out the and to go to our page to buy the Firefly Fund T-shirt in which all proceeds go directly to the non-profit organization!

edit 8: Good Morning Reddit! I'm back to answer more questions y'all!

Comments: 391 • Responses: 101  • Date: 

librarianjenn303 karma

This video was just gold, and your response was hilarious. But I have to know, why were the others not laughing? HOW were they not laughing I guess is the real question!

RealCatLawyer514 karma

The others were afraid to laugh, because we were in the virtual courtroom. But they told me it took all they had to keep from laughing. I'm not even kitten you!

tac0sandtequila76 karma

I'm a lawyer and I don't think I'd be able to hold in the laughter if I saw that during zoom court!

RealCatLawyer36 karma

Vesta_Re76 karma

I love the subtle reaction of the lawyer in the top left corner.

RealCatLawyer56 karma

Me too!

theleadingbrand227 karma

I just took the feb bar exam (TX-UBE) while I’m in results purgatory can I intern for you? Graduated from SouthTexas college of law- Houston December 2020 my skills are that I know how to turn off the cat filter. I can efile and work a coffee machine. I speak three languages, but none of them are Spanish :( Let me know. I’d love to have the famous cat lawyer as a reference and I’ll work for peanuts.

(Everything above is true and I’m being completely serious, like funny bc I don’t think you’d take me up on it, but also I would love to work with you and would be 100% in if you were)

RealCatLawyer222 karma

What a unique request, it's so exciting to see how Reddit can connect you with so many people! I'd love to talk with you, send me PM and we can set that up. I'll also send you a coupon code to our store soon at so you can get a free Real Cat Lawyer Sticker of your choice!

theleadingbrand102 karma

Sent! I can get you my resume and a writing sample by tomorrow if you tell me where to send it!

RealCatLawyer152 karma

Go ahead and send your resume to [email protected]! I'll be in touch. Would love if you could stick around the AMA and help answer any legal questions you see! Talk soon!

Hauwke89 karma

This is so wholesome.

RealCatLawyer117 karma

You're wholesome.

elissa70729 karma

This is wonderful

ButtercupColfax6 karma

Are you allergic to horsemeat?

theleadingbrand10 karma

I don’t know, I can’t read the label!

(Feb 2021 mbe inside we may NOT elaborate)

RealCatLawyer3 karma

It's kitten confidential!

DangerBay2015208 karma

I noticed during the recorded footage, there was an instruction up that prohibited recording of the proceedings.

Was the release of the hearing footage done contrary to this directive, or at the consent of the parties present to bring a smile to the faces of people in a stressful time?

RealCatLawyer329 karma

The judge released the footage so it was OK to be released. I'm glad it brought a smile to millions of people after our stressful year. (If there's follow up, the basic premise is that the Judge makes the rules for his/her court proceedings. The non-recording directive only applied to 3rd parties.)

Here's the video on my youtube channel, we'll be putting up some of the best clips and other content soon as well!

dawaxtadpole183 karma

Thanks for doing the AMA. Your initial “uuuhuuh”, it just cracks me up. My family laughed so hard together. Now we imitate your “uuuhuuh” when being addressed on occasion. Thanks for that! What do your kids think about your new found fame?

RealCatLawyer109 karma

My kids all love it and think it's hilarious. I wanted to get a sticker made with the onomatopoeia for that but couldn't decide on how to spell it!

N_Inquisitive42 karma

For my SO and I we do "I'm not a cat" or "I'm prepared to go forward" randomly and just burst out laughing.

RealCatLawyer30 karma

I love it! I'd like to send you a coupon code for a free sticker from my online store send me a PM!

Vesta_Re141 karma

Can you tell more about the Firefly fund? Why are you interested in supporting it?

RealCatLawyer289 karma

My niece has two young daughters suffering from an exceedingly rare disease - NPC1 - only 100 children in the US have this disease - childhood Alzheimer's. We're raising money to conduct research to cure this rare disease.

We're selling Firefly Fund T-shirts right now for which all the proceeds go directly to their non-profit. The link is near the bottom of my website

ifmacdo66 karma

This fund hits home as my sister just gave birth to a daughter with Wieacker-wolff syndrome, and there are ~60 cases worldwide. The problem with these diseases is that they aren't "popular" enough (meaning not a lot of people have them) to get funding and research funding like something along the lines of cancer is able to get.

I hope that the Firefly Find is able to grow to a point of being able to find research for multiple diseases.

RealCatLawyer48 karma

It truly is the goal, and you have my sympathies, I wish your sister and her family the best. We hope to do more fundraising and promotion for the Firefly Fund in the coming week as well as future events. It would be great if you joined the mailing list or our socials via our website so you could help us spread the word, and for anyone with the means to donate, Firefly Fund T-shirts are available with all the proceeds going directly to their non-profit organization.

I wish you and your family the best.

artistry121100 karma

You're a lawyer in a small town - what's it like having to practice all kinds of law rather than specializing?

Have you had to take on any big city kitty firms?

RealCatLawyer127 karma

Sometimes frustrating, but it keeps my brain active to have to delve into and learn new areas of law. I'm not afraid to take on big city kitty firms. They take themselves for granted and I outwork them.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

praziquantel81 karma

How did your client feel about the now infamous zoom hearing?

RealCatLawyer134 karma

My county attorney's office was the client. We were both dismayed at first and then happy to spread cheer.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

GoldfishMotorcycle80 karma


RealCatLawyer194 karma


Burbujitas-67 karma

Overall would you say the whole thing helped or hurt your business? Have you had an uptick in new clients at all?

RealCatLawyer116 karma

It's been helpful for business as it's spread the word for business about my law firm. But more importantly I'm so happy that I've been able to make the world laugh, because we've all needed it. Great question!

Burbujitas-42 karma

I definitely laughed out loud and it made my day. And I watched it multiple times. As an attorney myself, I could definitely see this happening to one of my, shall we say, more practiced colleagues. We see some crazy stuff in these Zoom court proceedings! But yours was definitely the funniest I've seen.

RealCatLawyer40 karma

Glad to hear you LOL'd! I saw a lawyer bad mouthing the judge when the lawyer thought he was turned off on zoom. I'd recommend not bad mouthing others in the first place!

artistry1218 karma

Lol. I wonder if people are going to start doing it intentionally.

Andythecrazycatlady10 karma

And we thank you sir for that 😊. We needed the laughter.

JanusOvidiusNasim60 karma

Why did you become a lawyer?

RealCatLawyer152 karma

When I was growing up, I hated bullies. I went to law school to try to help people. I hated watching all the big cats pick on all the little kittens!

RealCatLawyer102 karma

No, this was fake news created as part of a political mudslinging campaign. The allegations are fake, I don't have the connections, means, or motive to manipulate the federal government and DEA for my personal gain. I am proud of my career as a prosecutor and have just been re-elected to my third term as a county (cat) attorney.

Now it's time for you internet to share more of your hilarious memes!

_cactus_fucker_37 karma

Just curious, in Canada, the defence attorney and Crown attorney (prosecutor, sounds very elite, though) call each other "my friend" when they argue, its actually hilarious, gets passive aggressive and sarcastic quickly.

How do you address opposing counsel? Whats the stupidest thing a defence attorney has done and ruined it for his client? Or just himself. Charges of "intimidating the Crown" come up in the news frequently. Do you have that sort of protection?

RealCatLawyer24 karma

We address each other as 'counsel'.

When the client is lying about not knowing the location of the drugs, the defense lawyer shouldn't laugh about his client within earshot of the prosecutor. I used this against a defendant once.

Intimidating the prosecutor...not in Texas, they definitely don't want to intimidate the prosecution, I would say it's not good for their health.

Haggis_The_Barbarian44 karma

You seem to specialize in cat law. Do you have any experience in bird law?

RealCatLawyer28 karma

While I don't specialize in cat law, I am the one and only Real Cat Lawyer.

RealCatLawyer21 karma

While I'll go toe-to-toe with you in Bird Law, my knowledge of Bird Law isn't vast, though I do own 3 Peacocks and 5 Guinea Hens!

ohhim20 karma

What about tree law? Reddit's legal community seems to have an unhealthy preoccupation with that branch.

RealCatLawyer18 karma

I'm not a cat, but I'd speak for the trees

chevymonza39 karma

How did you end up with the cat filter to begin with? Did you hit the wrong button (that's all it takes I suppose)?

Also, you said in a virtual courtroom, in front of a judge, as a virtual cat, that you are "not a cat." Yet here you are as "the Real Cat Lawyer." Does this not create a credibility issue? :-p

RealCatLawyer59 karma

I was using my assistant's laptop for the zoom call, it was quite an old laptop, and since her daughter had been using her laptop prior we assume that it was her that had selected the filter when she was playing on the computer.

I'll have you know I have great credibility, I'm not a cat, and I'm the REAL CAT LAWYER!

chevymonza16 karma

Thank you! Felines deserve representation too!

RealCatLawyer46 karma

Wow that's so hilarious, it's been a while since anyone brought up my appearance in the Netflix Series, The Confession Killer. I, the Real Cat Lawyer, successfully defended Henry Lee Lucas, proving that he lied about confessing to 300 murders! This has been such a fun surprise, I'd love to send you a coupon code so you can get a free sticker from my shop at shoot me a PM!

DarkVenus0114 karma

That's really impressive! I must learn from you. I've been licensed for a long time, but just started small criminal and immigration litigation

RealCatLawyer15 karma

Are you a member of r/Lawyers as well? I was just told about this subreddit earlier and applied to join.

DarkVenus017 karma

I am not. Maybe I should apply, too!

RealCatLawyer3 karma

I applied tonight 😸

Khoshekh54137 karma

Will you stay on reddit post ama?

RealCatLawyer45 karma

Absolutely, I really have grown to enjoy seeing everybody's cat memes. I'm also hoping to run some free giveaways of some of my merchandise later this week on social media and have contests where meme makers, and art made by fans can bring everyone some smiles and laughs!

artistry12130 karma

Meow, how has it been transitioning to Zoom trials? Would you have ever imagined this when you were going into law school?

RealCatLawyer61 karma

When I went to law school there were no computers, internet, or Westlaw. We didn't imagine Zoom trials, but no one imagined our current connected world either. It is both better and worse, but at least we now we can share trials with cat memes.

Vesta_Re11 karma

What's Westlaw?

DirtyReseller31 karma

Legal research site. That and LexisNexis are the big two. So he’s saying they had to go to the library to research.

RealCatLawyer43 karma

This guy knows his stuff! Researching tough topics in the old days in a law library, it could take all day to find the answer to one question. Worse than herding cats. Today a simple question on a legal research site could give you a good answer in a moment.

COGspartaN727 karma

Do you feel this experience will create any future rules for online court conduct or simply be a forgiveable happenstance that comes with online court?

RealCatLawyer56 karma

I don't think there will be any new rules, as long as lawyers lead with their best paw forward.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

tonoocala21 karma

Hi I hope all is well! Is it true that you were fined? I hope not

RealCatLawyer43 karma

Neither I, nor the Cat were fined. Everyone had a a good laugh though, and I haven't heard of any sort of Feline Fines being applied in Texas Courts.

tonoocala11 karma

Glad to hear that!

RealCatLawyer9 karma

Any other funny questions? :)

JessieBellz19 karma

Are there any other hijinks that have happened to you as a result of Covid?

RealCatLawyer54 karma

Some lawyers seem to have gotten COVID 2 or 3 times to get out of hearings, lol. But the Real Cat Lawyer perseveres.

dee_lio18 karma

As a Texas lawyer who regularly appears via zoom, I felt an indescribable panic on your part when you first looked down and to the right in your cat avatar. I think it's every attorney's nightmare to be "that guy who messes up zoom."

Were you semi panicking at any point?

Also, how much hazing did you encounter after the hearing? (from either o/c or the judge.)

RealCatLawyer18 karma

I was panicked. I did not want to be the lawyer who screwed up Zoom court. I encountered plenty of teasing and the judge was very nice about the whole affair and did his best to ensure people didn't criticize me for my cat filter.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

red-giant-7817 karma

What's the most messed up thing about the legal system?

What's the best thing about it?

RealCatLawyer42 karma

The most messed up thing about it is that unfortunately money talks. Rich corporations can grind down poor defendants. The best thing is it's a fair system and if you get a lawyer who will fight for you you can win. This is different than almost anywhere else in the world.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

EldrichHumanNature17 karma

Do you prefer fish, chicken, or turkey meat? Or, perhaps mouse or snake meat?

RealCatLawyer26 karma

I prefer fish, given its rarity in West Texas.

Zunky_Zunko12 karma

are you sure??

RealCatLawyer25 karma

What kind of question is that, are you kitten me? What did you come here fur?

Zunky_Zunko6 karma

no, cuz many people lie on the internet (obviously) and i just dont wanna be trolled or jebaited

RealCatLawyer11 karma

My name's Rod Ponton and I'm from Alpine, Tx. You can see a little bit more information about me on my website.

You have any questions for me? I'm here to see what sorts of fun questions and memes everyone has.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

artistry12112 karma

Do lawyer cats get along with party cats?

RealCatLawyer7 karma

Yes, because I am a happy social creature.

Superbrawlfan12 karma

Why do courts use zoom? I know this might be kinda of topic, but security wise zoom has been proven much worse than many other mainstream video conferencing platforms. Surely some court cases should be too important to just be running such software? Correct me if I'm wrong on any of this.

Burbujitas-17 karma

Court is supposed to be a public proceeding, so it shouldn't really matter if third parties have access.

I think the answer is, courts were scrambling to figure this out and Zoom was what everyone knew/was most popular at the time. And there you go, it just stuck.

RealCatLawyer6 karma

It is illegal to record the hearings though, this can be seen in the Original Full Video

RealCatLawyer14 karma

The state of Texas courts have their own Zoom app that they believe is secure, has been good for us over the last 5 months with no security issues.

Zoethor213 karma

Zoom has a separate, at-least-supposedly-more-secure product called ZoomGov. We use it at work.

RealCatLawyer9 karma

This ^

Call_me_Callisto11 karma

Did you see that in the congressional hearing with Keith Gill aka u/deepfuckingvalue and Robinhood CEO Vlad Asshat (I don't remember his last name) that Keith Gill quoted you saying "I am not a cat" ?

check it out here

waheifilmguy10 karma

Have you considered always appearing as a cat in your court cases?

Your line “I am not a cat,” was low key brilliant and hilarious. Thanks for the chuckles.

RealCatLawyer9 karma

Thank you.

I never intended to appear as a cat and I don't plan to again except for on reddit or the internet... maybe in a children's novel

Ahchoo0110 karma

Hi. I’m a lawyer in California and I understand that you run your own private practice but also serve as the City / County prosecutor. What’s that like doing both simultaneously? Are there ever any conflicts?

RealCatLawyer2 karma

There aren't any conflicts, but it's very busy and leaves no time left over for chasing mice or kitten around.

scottmaclellan9 karma

Have you learned how to turn filters off yet? I'd honestly be disappointed if you had, I'd love to be represented by a cat in court.

RealCatLawyer19 karma

Frankly, no. I'm still hoping that cats only appear when they're supposed to.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

NorCalAthlete4 karma

Wait so you figured out how to do a Reddit AMA but not turn off the cat filter?

RealCatLawyer13 karma

With enough catnip, you can get all the help you need. Small towns have a big community.

brewgeoff7 karma

What are your thoughts on using the police to intimidate an ex?

RealCatLawyer16 karma

This was fake news created as part of a political mudslinging campaign. The allegations are baseless, I don't have the means or motive to manipulate the federal government and DEA for personal gain. I am proud of my career as a prosecutor, I've also just been re-elected for my third term as a County (Cat) Attorney.

rhinokitty7 karma

Are you really a cat though?

RealCatLawyer20 karma

Meow meow. Cat/Lawyer privilege.

bluecollarclassicist5 karma

Can I get a shoutout for my graduating class of library science graduates? Any advice for keeping up on our tech competencies?

RealCatLawyer10 karma

Find somebody young to keep you up to date, preferably not a cat.\_OZYBxxt/?utm\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

sin-and-love4 karma

Is that what all these lawyer cat memes were about? That explains it. I had no idea what everyone was going on about.

RealCatLawyer2 karma

Now you know! Follow me on all socials for great memes and shared fan content!

doomdoggie4 karma

Do you have a cat?

RealCatLawyer12 karma

I have one real cat... and millions of internet cats\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

JanusOvidiusNasim7 karma

Send cat pics

RealCatLawyer9 karma

Anyone know how to get pictures from my phone to my computer?\_OZYBxxt/?utm\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

HerrDoktorLaser3 karma

I generally have to email them to myself. Depending on your phone and your computer, you may be able to download them directly over USB.

HerrDoktorLaser3 karma

Link goes nowhere, unfortunately.

I'd say "post a picture of your phone", but that would sort of require a second phone or a second camera that doesn't immediately turn your phone into a cat.

CuChulainnsballsack5 karma

Honestly you've really turned my day around, granted its half one in the morning where I am but still, after reading some of your replies you have definitely set me up to have a nice day when I wake up.

Thank you for being so refreshing and uplifting in these mad times.

RealCatLawyer3 karma

That's all I hoped for when I went viral. It's so nice to see something as simple as someone feeling a bit of relief or having a laugh. Check back tomorrow on the AMA, hopefully I've answered many more questions!

PM me if you'd like a coupon for a free sticker of your choice from my website :)

RealCatLawyer3 karma

That's all I could hope for, in these trying times we have to support each other all we can! Check back tomorrow to see all the other replies as I'm hopeful there's many more responses, memes, and thoughtful questions.

PM me if you'd like a coupon code so you can select a free sticker from my online store

artistry1214 karma

What's your cat's name?

RealCatLawyer9 karma

My cat's name is Tabby :)

redditorknot6 karma

Is Tabby jealous of your fame? Has he/she ever posed as a lawyer?

RealCatLawyer8 karma

Tabby has a feline practice and can be seen in the corner of my office on the kitty laptop using kitty zoom for all cat conference calls.

carbontomato4 karma

When did you first find out that it went viral? And what did you think of it? Also, did you ever find out how to turn off the cat filter?

RealCatLawyer11 karma

Within an hour of the hearing I started receiving calls from around the United States. When I started looking at social media I was aghast that in fact the hearing had gone viral, it was too late to do anything about it. So I decided I would just have to embrace it and be grateful the joy was only at my expense.

bbwabba3 karma

Hi RealCatLawyer, I wanted to say thank you SO much for bringing us all so much joy! I legitimately laughed for 10 minutes straight when watching and still snicker a little bit whenever I think of the video 😂

Any advice for a stressed out second-semester 1L?

RealCatLawyer2 karma

You're welcome, but I play such a small part of what brings all the joy, it's mostly all of you! I'm glad it hasn't gotten old yet.

I would say keep your liquor cabinets stocked with stuff stronger than milk, and more cat videos to destress and decompress LOL! Being a lawyer is tough stuff.

AmadeusMop3 karma

Do you have a cat, and if so, can we see your cat?

RealCatLawyer6 karma

I do have a cat, his name is Tabby. I'll get out my camera tomorrow morning and take a picture, I'll share it here and on some cat picture subreddits!

violetmoonriot3 karma

Where can I learn kitten language? I need to communicate with my cats, they keep talking to me in meows but I don't know what they say. Do I need to enroll myself in some secret class? Thank you for your help.

RealCatLawyer9 karma

Your cat probably communicates as well with you as some of my law school professors did. Good luck! If you're desperate, you can try to enroll your cat in cLaw school, but it's very competitive.

Brothernod3 karma

Have you considered doing Cameo?

RealCatLawyer9 karma

Like an interview? What's a Cameo?

Lovesick_Rose233 karma

Generally speaking, what is your opinion of cats as a whole?

RealCatLawyer4 karma


DarthWaffle1643 karma

Hey there, I dont know if you will answer this or even see it, but are you really a cat? You said you were not multiple times but I have my doubts....

RealCatLawyer2 karma

I see everything, I've got the eyes of a.....human.

Puzzleheaded-Ad4733 karma

Are you a cat?

youwerenevermyfriend3 karma

Do you have any real pet kitties?

RealCatLawyer2 karma

I have one cat named Tabby :)

GuyanaFlavorAid2 karma

How are you with bird law?

RealCatLawyer3 karma

I've said it twice, and I'll say it a third time...the bird time?

crisps_ahoy2 karma

In the video it says it's illegal to record/livestream the zoom call. How come it was recorded?

PS. Video is very funny

RealCatLawyer2 karma

It was recorded by the judge, and since he released it to the public it became public domain. Here's the full original video so you can watch and share with friends! 😸

doctorwhoobgyn2 karma

I want to say I applaud you for embracing this in a lighthearted way! I have to ask, when you said, "I'm not a cat," was that just something you said in a panic, or was it a joke to ease the situation? Either way, it was great, and I hope it brings awareness to your niece's fund.

RealCatLawyer3 karma

That's my biggest hope as well, and it definitely was said in a panic! I was happy the judge was so kind and understanding. :)

TheDoctore389272 karma

How well can you purr and lick your butt?

RealCatLawyer2 karma

I'm not admitting to having tried such a thing, but I can guarantee you not well!

ButtercupColfax2 karma

Got any advice for lawyers just starting out?

RealCatLawyer5 karma

Network widely in your community, work hard, and always remain friendly. Your reputation is always your best asset.

lawyerlylair2 karma

My mom says you used to practice in Pecos, too. Is there a market in west Texas for an attorney that does exclusively appellate work?

RealCatLawyer3 karma

I still work in Pecos (PAY-kəs, many people mispronounce it) & I would have to say there is!

NbAlIvEr1001 karma

Do you know anything about Bird Law?

RealCatLawyer1 karma

I've said it once below, and I'll say it again.

Hyper_Pickle0 karma

How did you end up with the cat filter on?

RealCatLawyer3 karma

I was using my assistant's laptop for the zoom call, it was quite an old laptop, and since her daughter had been using her laptop prior we assume that it was her that had selected the filter when she was playing on the computer.

- The Real Cat Lawyer, Rod Ponton

Stryle0 karma


RealCatLawyer2 karma

These false allegations were part of a political mudslinging campaign, I've provided more details in some of the responses below. Feel free to ask any questions if you feel those don't answer all the questions you may have.

ZoltanBattery0 karma

Hi there, thanks for doing this AMA; it has been extremely entertaining!

Do you know if there's any way to get the Firefly Fund T-Shirt without the text on it? I think it's brilliant on it's own, and could actually be something I'd wear long-term.

RealCatLawyer1 karma

Not at this time but I'll make a note of it in case we do another run of the shirt or add more things to our store with this design! I appreciate your support and feedback, shoot me a PM and I'll send you a coupon code in the next day or so for a free sticker of your choice from my store at

verascity-7 karma

Seriously, though: what was your problem with Ilana Lipsen? Why did you put so much effort into making sure she was arrested multiple times? Why dig up obscure laws to pin on her and her family? Why did you visit people who posted and wrote about the raid?

I find it ironic that you claim to have worked against police misconduct, but appear to have encouraged at least a few seriously dodgy arrests in the past. Are you a changed man? If so, how and why?

RealCatLawyer8 karma

This was fake news created as part of a political mudslinging campaign. You can find more information in some of my other responses.

verascity-3 karma

I see that you're saying you didn't sleep with Ms. Lipsen, which I actually didn't ask about. Was anything else about the story fake?

RealCatLawyer7 karma

Yes, the other allegations are also fake, as I responded earlier, to suggest that I could manipulate the federal government and the DEA for my personal interest is fundamentally flawed.\_source=ig\_web\_copy\_link

wolfoflone-11 karma

So did u have sex with that woman when she was 18?

RealCatLawyer10 karma

No. I never had sex with that woman when she was 18 or anytime. This was fake news created as part of a political mudslinging campaign.

Dontbethatguy9867-36 karma

In 2014, you began a long process of harassment and power abuse against a woman and her family. What led you to do that? Spurned lover or just a power trip?

RealCatLawyer88 karma

As district attorney, I prosecuted a drug case brought to my office by the US Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA). These false allegations were made during a political mudslinging campaign by my opponent at re-election. I am proud of my career as a prosecutor and have just been re-elected to my third term as a county (cat) attorney. To suggest that I could manipulate the federal government and the DEA in order to harass a person is quite an absurd claim.

HerrDoktorLaser38 karma

Missed opportunity.


Just sayin'....

RealCatLawyer40 karma

You're more clever than I am, I was lucky enough to snatch up a few trademarks. The Cat Lawyer, El Abogato, Lawyer Cat, The Advocat, and more which will be in some upcoming content and merchandise on my social media and website!

HerrDoktorLaser14 karma

If you're going to grab "cattorney", be sure to get "cattorney general" and any other variations. If I'm able, I grant you full permission to take and trademark that IP for the low, low cost of absolutely nothing. Not even a can of wet food!

RealCatLawyer14 karma

Let's make a deal, how does half a can of wet food sound? Or better yet, I can offer you a coupon code for a free sticker of your choice from my website

HerrDoktorLaser4 karma

Not needed, but thanks!

RealCatLawyer5 karma

Everyone on Reddit is so nice! I'll keep you updated if we end up with the trademark, and if we make a sticker I'll send you one!

verascity5 karma

Whoa. What? Shit is getting real in this meme AMA.

Edit: Found it! I'm guessing you won't get an answer to this question, though.

artistry12130 karma

He answered below. The cat lawyer delivers:

I was the district attorney in a remote town of 6,000 people, not the head prosecutor in NYC. To suggest that I could manipulate the federal government and the DEA is fundamentally flawed. I'm here today though to spread happiness and support an important charity.

Meow back to business. You got any memes, jokes, or other questions? I'm happy to share my side of the story but today I want to focus on the fun y'all!

RealCatLawyer17 karma

Thanks for copying it over, I guess the original question was removed!

OnlyCuntsSayCunt18 karma

That account was literally created to harass you. Don’t worry about, happens all the time. Thanks for embracing the humor of the whole situation.

RealCatLawyer18 karma

How nice of you to say! Send me a PM I'd love to send you a cute cat sticker off my website check out to see which ones I've got to offer :)

artistry1214 karma

I want a sticker!

RealCatLawyer2 karma

Check out my website and follow my socials for some upcoming surprises this week!