My short bio: Hi Reddit I did this once before but why not have another bit of fun at it. So as you can see from my proof, I am a 32 yo gamer who was actually born in Russia, but live in the USA. Oh and I happen to be disabled. I am sure you can tell live has been hard to me and my living conditions are not very good, but I figure if you can't laugh at yourself, you're already done for. To that end I try to make people chuckle lightly, or at the very least, forcefully blow air out their noses, on my my YouTube channel

My Proof:

Edit a while ago because I was totally bullied on YouTube, though I still wanted to make commentaries, I made a sort of explanation video about my long and painful history. If you are interested, here it is, so I wouldn't write out a wall of text. I realize people will ask about my disabilities, and that's fine.

Edit 2 RIP my inbox.

Edit 3 Slow down I can't write that fast!

Important edit I am tired of typing for 6 hours nonstop. I'll stop for today. I'll answer stragglers tomorrow.

Edit 4 Everyone keeps asking where I live? In PA, near Philly. And no, I don't smoke weed. Yet. Also if anyone wants to chat or game, I am Crawlerz246 on steam - angry Russian smiley in an Ushanka hat avatar.

Edit 5 People keep adding me on steam and I maxed out my friend list and still have 60 invites pending. STOP ADDING ME ON STEAM!

P.S. In case anyone is staring in awkward silence, I'm not touchy. Ask away. I've been on Reddit 3 years so there isn't much I haven't read or seen no matter how dark or hilarious or disgusitng.

Comments: 1892 • Responses: 86  • Date: 

LuckyDane1456 karma

How come there is a convenient hole in your shorts right in between your legs?

crawlerz24681444 karma

OK before this gets out of hand that isn't a hole. Those shorts came without a fly, so one was haphazzardly sewn in. Because it wasn't a pro job the thing looks terrible and is constantly turning inside out.

ImAJollyLemonRancher445 karma

Ehhh already out of hand!

Reasonable_responses178 karma

Thats why a firm grip while pissing is key.

crawlerz2468581 karma

Nobody worry. I have a shitbucket. I am a certified colonel 100.

Signs8070 karma

Do you have that bipod knife?

crawlerz246831 karma

Haaaa.... no.

ArkeeTheGamerReddit1050 karma

Why aren't you squatting in your proof picture?

crawlerz24682983 karma

Knee damage. Believe me if I could squat in a Adidas running suit I would 10/10

modernatlas862 karma

What is the nature of your disability? Run of the mill dwarfism, or something more?

crawlerz24681305 karma

Besides dwarfism I was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis when I was only 3 (this was in '86 in Russia) and it got worse progressively over the years to the point where I stopped walking and my joints got damaged a lot. It kinda snowballed and got out of control. It's not killing me directly but it sure is making my life terribly hard.

modernatlas424 karma

How does the arthritis effect your ability to play games?(if at all)

crawlerz2468652 karma

It actually does somewhat. I mean I can type and hold a mouse well enough but more physical things like racing (in particular heel-toe that I can't manage on my G27 setup) are mostly impossible cuz I can't twist my leg.

banksz269 karma

I have JRA as well, suuuuuucks. Been dealing with it since I was 19.

crawlerz2468948 karma

Ugh! I know. Can't move for shit. Stiff all day (and not where it counts either).

TehMvnk150 karma

Have you ever tried smoking cannabis, and if so, did/does it help with some of the difficulties posed by JRA?

crawlerz2468427 karma

I have not but I've been told it helps. I have no friends or people I can trust enough to buy for me. Laws in this country are fucked.

MinimalistBruno176 karma

Where you at homes? I know people.

crawlerz2468100 karma

Um... What kind of people?

LTNBFU42 karma


crawlerz246881 karma


dominicanerd85101 karma

JRA sucks, I've had it as long as you have. I've had to have my knees and hips replaced or could not walk anymore. But damn dwarfism too? How do you deal cause let me tell you I have depression and I'm pretty sure my health adds to me feeling like shit like 80 percent of the time.

crawlerz2468320 karma

I have depression

Ditto on this front. I've already botched one suicide. Health issues I could maybe handle, but my parents, particularly my mother is an unbelievable peice of ever evolving shit who makes my life nearly unbearable.

On the plus side I have 2 great siblings and an awesome dog.

DragonToothGarden41 karma

Can you leave your mom? Or are you financially stuck? I had a suicide attempt from chronic pain and obviously I backed off at the last minute.

Chronic pain is a fucking evil in itself. But toss in a parent who doesn't take it seriously or is not a good person, or only concerned with their own self? Recipe for torture unless you can gt out.

Now that you are in the US, is there any public/city-assistance for independent living available to you that would allow you to break away from your mom?

crawlerz246878 karma

Or are you financially stuck?

Not really financially as I believe I fit assisted housing criteria and my SSI should help. More mentally and physically. If I can find a accessible apt that I can live in. I don't want to go to a facility. I'm already in one as it were. I saw but they only take locals.

ThunderOrb844 karma

How does Russian culture treat dwarves? Do you think you get less respect than you would in somewhere like America or the UK?

Also, my wife says you look more like an elf than a dwarf. (It was a compliment.)

crawlerz24682188 karma

Is your wife single?

Seriously, when I was little (OK I walked into that one.) MORE so than now I got lots of questions from passerby babushkas. "Why isn't he walking himself? He's big enough!" "Fuck you old hag."

InukChinook806 karma

Where can I buy one of you to stick on my mantle? Fuck Elf on the Shelf, I want a Russian for Discussion.

crawlerz24681097 karma

I want a Russian for Discussion.

Let's not Russian to this.

JusticeRings668 karma

Ever thought about signing up for human/machine interface experiments? I have always been fascinated by this field but right now they only tend to accept people with extreme mobility issues like yours.

crawlerz2468659 karma

I haven't no. That'd be awesome.

prozacgod223 karma

Please do report back I would be super jealous I'd love to have something like that in my brain

crawlerz2468251 karma

Posted. Check my history.

buckobcfc570 karma

do you buy childrens clothes or have clothes tailor made not trying to be insulting just always wondered?

crawlerz24681173 karma

I try to find children's clothes but that look serious enough that they aren't for 3yos.

donaldpump69428 karma

how often do you slay puss?

crawlerz2468988 karma

Meet me behind the shed.......

Hatch-380 karma

As both a russian and a dwarf, could you rate your alcohol tolerance on a scale of 1-10 and then explain just how far over 9000 it really is?

crawlerz2468484 karma

I am actually working on upping my limit at the moment. If I start slurring this AMA I might've just reached the limit.

DeonCode328 karma

"I've been told on occasional, I'm funny. Mostly by myself."

Sold. Have my upvote & questions: what angers you the most (about gaming)? Any tips for improvements for developers who wanna make sure their game experience works out for you?

crawlerz2468272 karma

what angers you the most (about gaming)?

Nothing really. Community is terrible in some games though. COD and frankly BF too has its share of morons and bigots.

MaxMouseOCX189 karma

I play league of legends... Let me tell you about shitty communities.

crawlerz2468115 karma

Oy.... сука блять

whymauri155 karma

Community is terrible in some games though.

No kidding... I remember you from the Battlelog forums. You got bullied before people realized it was a disease, and even after that some people were relentless. You were, and still are after three years, one of the few outstandingly positive people on the Offtopic section.

Really glad to see you on Reddit.

crawlerz2468157 karma

I remember you from the Battlelog forums.

Oh sweet! Fucking small world.

SorteUsman292 karma

Hey man! So a few question: Why did you decide to travel to the US? What games do you play, and why?

crawlerz2468445 karma

I came here not of my own free will. My parents emigrated when I was 10.

Games? Well I try to have fun mostly with FPS game, some racing sims too, because as you can imagine life hasn't been all that fun for be being disabled and all and the cliche answer is it keeps me (sort of) sane. Also contact with other people, even on ts, is important as I don't get out much.

silverwolfer136 karma

Do you rant to go back to russia?

crawlerz2468289 karma

At the moment I'm just trying to survive day to day. If I ever get stable in my health and living conditions, yes.

geshikhte172 karma

Considering how poorly people with disabilities are accommodated in Russia, do you not worry about your quality of life if you return there?

crawlerz2468238 karma

Yes accessibility (at least when I was there) was nonexistent. I was carted around in a shitty baby stroller. There was no ramps or whatever. I'm sure it's better now, especially in Moscow because it's after all Moscow. But where I lived? Probably not.

gazah265 karma

Would you say this is your daily life?

crawlerz2468270 karma

сука блять!

kdma81253 karma

Are you angry because you're Russian, or because you're a gamer?

crawlerz2468905 karma


whiskyart234 karma

Have you done anything to ease your daily life, perhaps with regards to difficulties you might face given your physique?

crawlerz2468427 karma

You know this is very hard, because I never left home due my disabilities but I want to very much. My own parents have really done nothing to improve or make easier my living conditions. They aren't caring people, so at the moment I am looking into accessible apartments.

whiskyart154 karma

Sorry to hear about your conditions mate. I'd reckon finding an apartment with ease of access is definitely a wise decision. It'd be great if you can reach out to others online who share the same plight as you do, I'm sure they'd be able to give you sound advices (from the perspective of someone who faces similar difficulties) to help improve your life! Stay positive!

crawlerz2468231 karma

Stay positive!

Ugh! Living with people who hate you is a downer. So far I haven't found anything, except some special apt in Ohio but regrettably they only accept locals.

jarjarbrooks160 karma

We need to start a new rich-folks trend. the House Dwarf as a status symbol.

Kardashians everywhere will be clamoring to hire the "best" ones, you'd be set for life.

crawlerz2468482 karma

I do have a nice ass. I'm halfway there.

Mcnichs180 karma

What is your all time favorite game and why is it Clue?

crawlerz2468475 karma

Is no secret Col Mustard was under glorious communist mind control when he was in the library. But is no with candlestick.

UnAmusedCynic169 karma

Would your life be better/worse had your family stayed in Russia? And have you ever been back to Russia?

crawlerz2468498 karma

I don't want to sound unpatriotic but due to my health issues and lack of good medicine in most parts of Russia I'd probably be dead by now if I stayed.

ele_ctric151 karma

What do you do for a living?

crawlerz2468277 karma

Nothing because there isn't a lot I can do. I do a little crowtasking through mturk when I'm up to it though.

Bergmiester183 karma

What kind of things do you task the crows with?

crawlerz2468610 karma

Bringing me back my self worth.

heiferly76 karma

Hey man, nice to see you out "in the wild" ... it's been too long!! :)

crawlerz2468120 karma

Oh hey! Shit this internet is a small world.

heiferly31 karma

Good to see you alive and kicking. :) I've been having a shit time of things lately. (I literally had shit back up into my stomach this week, so that's been "fun".) Hoping your week is going even marginally better than that. Hit me up sometime with an update on you!

crawlerz246841 karma

Hit me up sometime with an update on you!

A lot of nothing and shame. How about you? How have you been? We haven't messaged in months.

reddittarded128 karma

Do you have a girlfriend?

crawlerz24681128 karma

I have two. Because I'm ambidextrous.

amphitryo122 karma

Do you stream on twitch?

crawlerz2468209 karma

I should. People asked that before. But bandwidth and lagging it killing it. I tried yotube streaming once.

Hans_Trolljegeren59 karma

Well hopefully you'll be able to because I know I'd follow.

crawlerz2468151 karma

Follow my youtubes for now, comrade. More glorious content to arrive shortly.

UKnick88 karma

You say you've been bullied, what's the worst thing you have ever been called on the internet?

crawlerz2468360 karma

"You sound like a Taiwanese tranny." -- youtube comment.

MaxMouseOCX146 karma

... What the fuck does a Taiwanese transvestite sound like?!

crawlerz2468279 karma

Apparently this twat knows? Honestly it's like a XBOX chat man.

Grimpler83 karma

Do you have a small kettle, plates and cups? :)

crawlerz2468127 karma

Nope. Though come to think of it, that's a great idea.

Grimpler47 karma

crawlerz246856 karma

Oh ha. Yes yes. Go on.

hot_coffee74 karma

Hi, thanks for the AMA!

What's your cold resistance, axe mastery level and str?
And why should I choose to play as a Siberian Dwarf instead of another race?

crawlerz246889 karma

Slightly under 9000. But only due to alcohol not being maxed out. Yet.

PerplexedGoblin64 karma

Your voice is great and listening to your commentary was enjoyable.

PS: Could you be more angry?

crawlerz2468277 karma

PS: Could you be more angry?

Only if I was Chandler Bing.

tonyswitchblade62 karma

You kind of resemble Liam McPoyle from Always Sunny. Has anyone ever told you that or have you noticed the resemblance?

crawlerz2468201 karma

I don't have any friends so no one ever said that, no. lonelinessintensifies

mellobeth49 karma

A friend's daughter has systemic JIA. Are you taking any meds for yours? If so, has anything been particularly effective?

crawlerz246892 karma

Shit um... Right now it's been going to shit the last couple of years, mainly due to depression interfering. But biologics helped me a ton when they appeared. Enbrel made a massive difference.

Shimo_44 karma

In respect to your disability and arthritis and such do you see yourself playing games for years to come or is it something you may have to give up?

crawlerz246869 karma

Hopefully I won't have to give it up no.

Loweded42 karma

Due to your disability, is your ability to play games affected? How do you counter any limitations you have?

crawlerz246884 karma

Yes, some physicality is a bitch. Like I love sim racing but even with my steering wheel it's hard to work the pedals quick enough. I can't heel toe at all. Just too much ankle damage.

Loweded22 karma

What about in FPS's?

crawlerz246864 karma

Gaming? The usualy I guess, BF4 and so on. R6 Siege, Titanfall.... I've even been known to play shudder COD.

SuperKevlar29 karma

Have you looked into street fighter? We have brolylegs in the community and has some huge disabilities and is still able to whoop 99% of the community's asses

crawlerz246838 karma

I have not. Explain.

SuperKevlar61 karma

He has a couple macros set up for the buttons he can't reach he basically plays with his face. Which are tournament legal

I think the reason he is so successful is because street fighter is more deliberate in button presses and not so much twitch reflexes like most shooters. He can't pull of the crazy combos but he makes up for it in space control and setting the tone of the matchup

Here is a short little bio on him kind of inspirational since I'm ass at street fighter

crawlerz246845 karma

Too fucking right!

BungusMcFungus39 karma

Have you ever been denied buying alcohol or tobacco even when showing ID?

crawlerz246875 karma

Don't buy tobaccy and honestly if someone wants to go there, I have a state ID.

bigboys132 karma

What's your opinion on the current trend of mean-spirited internet humor that's usually at the expense of people like disabled people? (i.e.: /r/imgoingtohellforthis)

crawlerz2468186 karma

I'm a subsriber to that subreddit. I'm all for a good jab now and then, even at my own expense. When it's all in good humor and no one gets hurt, why the fuck not? You know where I'd be if I didn't laugh at myself? Dead.

R33Gtst30 karma

Is it you who hacked my origin account and changed everything to Russian?

crawlerz246881 karma

Pfffft. Nice try, EA.

zDjArto26 karma

Do you think of yourself as an American or do you stick more with your roots? Who do you think is the best candidate to ease up tensions between US and Russia?

crawlerz2468163 karma

I'm more Americanized now, I lived here 21 years. Relations? Dude they're OK. Media is bullshitting everyone. On the phone Obama and Putin are chummy and probably joke about invading Germany every once in a while.

monoziga24 karma

What are your plans for the future?

crawlerz2468134 karma

Get the fuck out of this mental prison I call a home. Find an apt where I can live in peace like a semi-normal human being.

giverofnofucks21 karma

How much vodka can you drink?

crawlerz246857 karma

Less when on meds. Fucker apparently interferes.

Political_nonsense20 karma

What's your opinion on Putin's aggressive actions toward Ukraine in Crimea and the east? Should President Obama ask Putin to say he's sorry?

crawlerz2468100 karma

Should he ask him to say he's sorry? What is this the 3rd grade?

I wasn't for his bullshittery in Crimea but I generally like Putin. He's like a communist version of a Bond villain.

unmodster19 karma

Have you seen "The Man From U.N.C.L.E."? Did you like it?

crawlerz246861 karma

It was pretty cool. Though i enjoyed Snatch quite a bit more.

manhands3016 karma

When you have the option to do so, do you choose to be the "Russian" faction in games? If so, does this extend to being the USSR for the board game 'Axis and Allies'?

Red grapes, or green grapes?

crawlerz246832 karma

I could never fly the German BF-109 in Il-2 Forgotten Battles.

Blue grapes FTW.

Netras15 karma

What's some of your favorite FPS games? And do you prefer console or PC as a platform?

crawlerz2468133 karma

I am PC master race. But I do have an N64.

Enragedocelot10 karma

favorite cereal?

crawlerz246855 karma

Blood ofmyenemies pudding

cgilbraid9 karma

Have you ever tried sailing? There's a lot of cool technologies that make it possible for people with (severe) physical disabilities to go out on the water. It's a good way to find a community as well!

crawlerz246828 karma

My granddaddy had a motorboat way back when in Russia I used to love to drive it. Now that I think back on it, there was no talk of any vests or water safety and none of us could swim. Ugh!

I'd love to shoot at targets though. Not sure how with my hands, but I'd love to fire a pistol.

SibylProxy3 karma

have you ever looked into stem cell injections for your joints?

crawlerz24687 karma

I have not looked into anything at this point. I've been isolated from society for most of my life, thank you mommy dearest, you piece of shit. I haven't even talked to friends online until a few years back.

ch4os13373 karma

I thought this was /r/roastme so here I was feeling awful trying to come up with ways to insult you and thought you had massive balls.

So that's my question, would you consider going on /r/roastme? :D (It's all in good spirits)

crawlerz24689 karma

So that's my question, would you consider going on /r/roastme? :D (It's all in good spirits)

Fuck yes!

VernacularRaptor2 karma

Privet! Ti iz kakovo goroda izhodna? Ya videl shto ti hotches obratno v Rassiyu... Pochemy? Naxera tebe tam delat, v amerike 1000x luchsya! Ладно, желаю успехи по YouTube!

crawlerz24684 karma

Я из Уфы. Нет в Россию не собираюсь, может только посмотреть и назад. Москву жалко совсем не видел пока был там.

Vorshe2 karma

What is your steam name?

crawlerz24684 karma

Tried linking my profile directly can NEVER remember my pw. It's Crawlerz246 with an angry Russian smiley avatar in an Ushanka hat.

RoseEsque2 karma

Which community sites do you visit besides reddit? 4chan? Are people welcoming to you on those other sites once they learn (assuming they do) of your disability?

crawlerz24683 karma

Besides reddit, some forums but they don't really know a lot about me. My youtube subscribers know though, I've shown myself plenty of times.

Reasonable_responses2 karma

Will you post your favorite pepe?

I can smell the boards on you.

crawlerz24681 karma

You'd be wrong. Not into pepes one single bit.

tripnfx2 karma

You play Spintires? That's the shiznit for Russian 4x4 truck action.

crawlerz24686 karma

Not yet. I'm looking into Escape from Tarkov though, even watching their dev dairies. Looks really well made.

GnomishProtozoa2 karma

Bulbasaur, Charmander, or Squirtle?

crawlerz246818 karma

In Soviet Russia, Putin catch all of you.

lapotronic2 karma

do you need a smaller toilet seat for when you take your poops?

crawlerz246816 karma

Yes. Unless is too large of poopings.

doctorMcbob1 karma

What is your favorite breakfast?

crawlerz24682 karma

Probably an eggo wallfle and some bacon. I could never be muslim. I fucking love bacon. (I'm a bad Jew).

dick-nipples-2 karma

Do you have a favorite thing to do/say when you catch people staring at you? I'd be like this

crawlerz24681 karma

No but I have a quick wit and usually answer how people say.

[deleted]-7 karma


crawlerz246815 karma

Everything's more anatomically correct than Trump's.

delayed_reign-8 karma

You are an AMA?

crawlerz246834 karma

No I am Communist bear.