zachinoz2872 karma

Ok, that's a solid 2 hours. Thank you guys so much for your support. Even those of you that hit downvote the second you saw my name; I shall continue to seek your approval in the most mentally unhealthy way possible. Love and snuggles, ZB

cheady042568 karma

Did you and Sarah Chalke ever actually have sex? Be honest, man.

zachinoz3420 karma

Not vaginally.

ImageModeCMYK930 karma

just anal then?

zachinoz2306 karma


fappingit2u2406 karma

Garden state is my favorite movie ever. How awesome was it to kiss Natalie Portman?

zachinoz3896 karma

If you ever get the chance, I highly recommend it.

iamtheraptor1463 karma

I would like to ask if you are going to make another film soon. Garden State is one of my favorite movies and would love to see you direct something again.

zachinoz2914 karma

YES! Working hard on this. It's been hard to pull something together that I could get financed. Even after the success of Garden State, people just want you to make the same thing over and over. (And keep in mind everyone in Hollywood- EVERYONE - passed on GS. Eventually I found an ex-mortgage broker who took a risk on me.) I'm trying to hard to only do movies I'd wanna see myself. Which means one has to be patient and work even harder to get stuff made you believe in. I have a new screenplay I've written with my brother, Adam, and the response has been amazing. We're praying (oops sorry Reddit) we're hoping, that it goes into production this summer. I'll star and direct.

barfstool456 karma

Awesome! Garden State is one of the most therapeutic films I've ever watched, the scene when it starts raining is just pure magic.

Any director/writer that you would consider to have inspired you the most in your career?

zachinoz665 karma

Hal Ashby.

DGOJG259 karma

Why not try Kickstarter or similar sources of crowd funding?

zachinoz869 karma

You can't really raise enough money on Kickstarter yet. There are some new sites starting that will eventually allow anyone and everyone to own a piece of a movie; invest in it like a stock. But you can imagine the amount of legal issues this raises. So look for it sometime around 3012.

Dr_Funke19216 karma

Damn, I love the integrity you have with your work. I know that anything I see with you starring/involved in is going to be top-notch. You're the best. Loved the High Cost of Living, by the way.

zachinoz418 karma

Thanks. That's the kind of movie I wanna make. The smaller personal movies are the ones I love most.

foddon42 karma

How did Garden State do financially?

zachinoz145 karma

It made a lot of money. Mostly for my investor; the sole person who was willing to gamble on me. So I am happy for him.

patleeman2254 karma

Garden State 2: Garden harder.

zachinoz2651 karma

This time, it's personal.

zachinoz1099 karma

Revenge of The Fast Food Knight (Jim Parsons)

TheGallagher2378 karma

Hey Zach, I was on /r/gonewild just after you posted about it on Facebook and got it it flooded with dozens of beautiful women dedicating their posts to you. I didn't know you had posted about it on Facebook and assumed you were some sort of international sex God.

Are you an international sex God?

zachinoz2883 karma

No. That gonewild day was insane though. I definitely think as I'm headed towards the white light on my deathbed I'll remember a full day of reddit boobies dedicated to me.

zachinoz2767 karma

This is exactly how I felt. Could not have said it better myself.

nicolauz1175 karma

The conversation you and Chris Hardwick had on Nerdist podcast was quite amazing. Also, stay cool homeslice !

zachinoz1670 karma

Thanks. I really like Chris. He's one of the good ones.

Oldnumber0071475 karma

Well, sex god or not, you got a lot of women to show the world their boobs.

And for that, we thank you.

Edit: OK, so yeah, as people keep pointing out, I accidentally used a Tosh.0 tagline. I am, in fact, not Daniel Tosh.

zachinoz2298 karma

Boobs are the best. They make everyone smile.

Zlurpo686 karma

So in Arrested Development, your character wasn't too much of a stretch!

zachinoz1038 karma

Ha! That was sposed to be Joe Francis. So...... no!

zachinoz2775 karma

That was the silliest, dumbest joke I ever thought of, and I think it's the single most viral thing I've ever done. Next to "Eeeeeaaaaaaaaglllleeee!!!!"

Surreal_Effect274 karma

So you came up with "EEEAAAAAGGGGLLLLLLEEEEE"? That wasn't written in?

How did Donald not burst out laughing when you did that??

zachinoz686 karma

I improvised it when Frasier picked me up and spun me. I thought it would be funny if even though JD hated it at first, he suddenly felt like a glorious Eagle. People lost their shit over it, so we started doing it as a recurring thing. My "whatchoo talking bout Willis?" if you will...

hooshbag2253 karma


zachinoz2738 karma

I love the one where Frasier dies, but my favorite was the third episode we ever did; the one where we each lose our first patient. Thought the writing was insanely good and really set the tone early for what the show could be; have you laughing one second and crying the next.

shwag9452190 karma

After all those years of JD pining over Elliot did you ever have romantic feelings for Sarah Chalke?

zachinoz3260 karma

Of course. But we've all moved on. She is engaged. And I have Donald.

DaisyFayBuchanan3374 karma

You two can ride off into the sunset together.

zachinoz3261 karma

This should be upvoted more. That had us on separate bikes and Donald and I decided "No... we should be on the same bike."

TheHappyFox2165 karma

A friend of mine is interviewing Donald Faison next week--any fun suggestions for how to screw with him?

zachinoz3108 karma

Ask him what he likes more, weed or animating Legos?

MrCompletely1512 karma

animating legos...on weed

zachinoz2609 karma

Donald is happiest in his man-cave animating Star Wars Legos with a fresh batch of God's Lettuce.

Xeon062138 karma

How was your off screen relationship with John C. McGinley while doing Scrubs?

zachinoz2609 karma

He is really that intense. I love him to death. He's pretty much that guy, but a giant teddy bear and the best Dad in the WORLD!

NickDerpkins610 karma

Wow this is exactly what I wanted to hear

GeneralWarts173 karma

I remember reading an article about how John built a home gym so that he could spend more time taking care of his daughter. If I remember correctly she has a disability or something similar. So yea, he's a pretty great dad.

Sorry I can't find the article with a quick google search.

garlicdeath217 karma

I believe she has down syndrome. If you notice in the show he's always wearing an awareness bracelet.

zachinoz95 karma

It's his son, Max. And John is very involved with Down Syndrome Awareness and all related issues.

AlyoChem1375 karma


zachinoz2737 karma

Neil is hilarious. He made up most of his lines. Sometimes a script would show up and when Neil enters it would just say (Neil makes up something and then exits.) A true genius improvisor.

zachinoz2458 karma

BTW, Neil wasn't even supposed to have such a big part in the show. He was so genius in the pilot that Bill added him permanently.

ThePeanutBuddha918 karma

More importantly... did The Janitor really want to kill you?

zachinoz1972 karma

After 8.5 years everyday together, we all wanted to kill each other sometimes. There's full episodes where Sarah and I or Donald and I were in a fight and not even talking to each other.

jaredstruick1034 karma

How can you act like you're OK with them then? (While on set)

zachinoz2306 karma

I'm sure you've had to go out with your signifigant other when you've just had a fight and you're both acting like everything's fine... When they called action Sarah and I would hug and make out or whatever and then when they called cut we'd ignore each other like boxers after a bell.

LoTGoD913 karma

I swear I would watch anything you two do together again!

zachinoz2452 karma

I dream that one day we'll do a "buddy-cop" movie together. Maybe Bill Lawrence would write it. Something about Donald and I as truly inept cops makes me giggle.

jarronzo1998 karma

Zach, I just wanted to thank you for, well, just everything. A few months ago I was eating brunch with my gf at Eveleigh on Sunset Blvd. in Los Angeles and you came in and sat at the table next to us. In the months leading up to that day, I had been going through some tough stuff, but had found solace in "Scrubs", which I watched religiously on Netflix every night. When you walked in, my stomach sank, and to my GF's chagrin, I knew I had to take this once in a lifetime opportunity to say something. As we left, I turned around to say thank you. You were so friendly, humble, and appreciative, and it meant the world to me that you would take a moment to shake my hand and let me say thanks. So here I am again, saying thank you, and hoping our paths cross again someday.

zachinoz2260 karma

Thank you. Nothing makes me happier in life than hearing I cheered someone up when they were down. May sound cheesy, but I'm 37 years in, and nothing makes me feel better than that.

efish20101936 karma

Is Hooch really crazy?

zachinoz2614 karma

Hooch is in-fucking-sane. This is not a joke. Hooch is out of his mind. If you ever see Hooch... run.

tomaso1109 karma

Have you seen that last episode? Hooch is crazy.

zachinoz2246 karma

That wasn't a costume. He was actually delivered to set in a straight jacket.

MoundofManure31681 karma

I went to Columbia high! I saw your freshman year video for Mr. Mullens Class, The sneaker thief, I SAW YOUR MULLET!

zachinoz1860 karma

Great TV production teacher. That was probably my first film assignment ever.

constipated_giraffe1582 karma

I have no idea how to phrase this question blob in my head, so here goes:

I’ve always wondered about the everyday lives of the actors behind very likeable relatable characters. When you meet someone for the first time, do they treat you like your on screen alter-egos? Is it hard for someone to get to know the real you? Or, do you put enough of yourself into your characters that the two overlap?

And, do you actively try to find a balance of people that are star-struck around you (because ego stroking is nice) and people you can be a, for lack of a better term, ‘normal person’ around? Do you think it takes longer for a person to be themselves around you?

zachinoz2148 karma

I'm super comfortable around anyone who's comfortable around me. I get geeked-out around people I'm a fan of as well though. Hung out with Howard Stern a few times and the entire time I just kept repeating "act normal, act normal."

basmith71545 karma

I am sorry that I edited your Wikipedia page once to say you were the Anti-Christ.

zachinoz1897 karma

You're not the first or the last to fuck with me on the web. Mazel tov.

Struwwl1498 karma

Do you actually like Appletinis?

zachinoz2500 karma

I'm so sorry, but no. Not at all. It's sugar. Sugar makes you hungover. Don't be mad at me...

KoalaYummies1487 karma

Words cannot describe how disappointed I am right now.

listentobillyzane1990 karma

Its Season 9 all over again

zachinoz3140 karma

Haha. Sorry about 9. We tried to keep it going...

gay4u691475 karma

Do you ever sit back and watch an episode of Scrubs?

zachinoz2215 karma

Not really. Sometimes on Twitter when someone sends me a funny quick clip that says like "my favorite Scrubs moment" I'll check it out and laugh out loud at the memories. But I don't click on it when I see it on the guide or anything.

hdog20121332 karma

What's your favorite Scrubs episode?

zachinoz2374 karma

I'm biased; I like the bigger scale ones I directed. "My Way Home" (the Wizard of Oz) one, the Fairy Tale one, the one where Donald and I go on a quest to find Molly to give her the note that says I can have sex with her from Sarah. - That's probably my uber fave, cause it was a HUGE episode and the first I directed. (And the macking with Heather, was a bonus...)

Jax3R1269 karma

Tell us more about the macking with Heather!

zachinoz2494 karma

Mmmm. Heathery...

DeathSupportSystem1325 karma

Aw yiss.


zachinoz2194 karma

Heather actually lives above me in NYC and just had a fire in her place. So my Heather-boner is somewhat curtailed by the fact that my apartment is semi-fucked. Not to worry though, a Heather boner never disappears for too long.

jaredstruick901 karma

What happened?

zachinoz2876 karma

Heather is so hot, she came fire.

DiamondAge1310 karma

Zach, the scene with you and Michael J. Fox is one of my favorites from scrubs. Which character played via celebrity cameo was your favorite?

zachinoz2261 karma

Love this one and of course the late John Ritter. He was/is a hero of mine. When I was a kid, "Threes Company" was my introduction into physical comedy. He was a master. True story: I sat down at the dinner table as a little boy and said, "Dad, why does my penis get hard when I look at Chrissy from Three's Company?"

Highowa1306 karma

Who has a nicer bong, you or Faison?

zachinoz2818 karma

I love smoking Donald's brown bong.

tannedbatman1084 karma

Did you feel that Scrubs Season 9 was definitely not needed?

zachinoz2247 karma

I thought it was worth it to try to keep it going. It works on some shows like ER or House. You never know. But it turns out... y'all hated it!

KoalaYummies925 karma

Only because of the drastic shift in characters/pov. The main reason I watched scrubs in the later seasons was the web of amazing characters. From the main players all the way down to Beardface and Snoop Dogg Intern/Resident/Attending, the characters were magnificent. I grew to love them after getting to know them for so many seasons. The side stories, the recurring jokes and occasional appearances of the 'other characters' were so well-done it was hard to not grow to like them.

Season nine felt...forced. I know it had troubles between Bill Lawrence and NBC, but it felt like the new batch of characters were being thrust into my face--there was no time to grow to love them and learn their stories gradually. It was just BAM! HERE ARE THE CHARACTERS YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO LOVE. I would've grown accustomed to it much better if it was titled as a spin-off or an independent show instead of an awkward transition to a new era of scrubs.

zachinoz1387 karma

There were all new writers. No Bill, no me, on a set instead of the real hospital and like 8 new characters. So it was bound to be... different.

deformedorange1041 karma

How emotional were you during the Scrubs Season 8 finale?

zachinoz2108 karma

Very sad. That scene where I walk down the hallway passed all of the supporting characters. I cried. And then watching that video projected on the sheet... I lost it. Most people don't know this, but the janitor who pulls the sheet down and says goodbye is Bill Lawrence. (the show's creator)

tushtush393 karma

Was there actually a projection there?

zachinoz835 karma

Yeah. My idea. I stole it from my film school movie. Projecting images onto faces.

pton16995 karma

whats the stupidest thing you have bought with your wealth?

zachinoz1738 karma

An airplane. Got my pilots license and I love flying. But unless you have the time to use it a lot. The bills get ludicrous for something that's sitting in a hangar.

Mackle990 karma

What is your favorite tv show that is on air at the minute?

zachinoz2022 karma

Love: Homeland, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, The Daily Show, Rachel Maddow, Extreme RV's, Bill Maher, (and the ultimate guilty pleasure, no judgements, but I'm a theater geek: Smash)

zwand19979 karma

What's it like being a never-nude?

08mms749 karma

There are literally dozens of them!

zachinoz1624 karma

I loved it! I wanted to be involved somehow with Tobias in this new season/movie, but my phone hasn't rung. How great would it be to see Tobias at a never-nude convention?

ryanpolly872 karma

Did you and Donald create the "guy love" song?

zachinoz1428 karma

No. Genius writers.

shzadh676 karma

When you were on Punk'd, were you really that pissed?

zachinoz1976 karma

Yes. Wouldn't you have been? First week with your dream car it gets tagged by teenagers? I punched that little fucker. (they edited that part out.)

Salacious-358 karma

1. I know your career started with you doing Shakespeare, so if you could star in one big production of any Shakespearian play, which of his works would you pick, and which character would you play? Why that character?

2. What one role do you regret turning down?

3. What one role did you apply for (and weren’t picked for) that you really wanted?

4. What is the most ridiculous, insane reaction you have ever gotten from someone who recognized you in public?

zachinoz83 karma

1) Love to do Midsummers or one of the comedies... As You Like It perhaps. 2) None. 3) I was up for the role that Joaquin Phoenix got as the kid in Parenthood when I was a kid. I wanted it so badly. But he crushed it better than I could have. Also up for the role of young Tom Hanks in Big, wanted that one too. 4) Dax?!?!? I love you in that prison movie!

angrath298 karma

Have you ever had any significant homosexual experiences?

zachinoz752 karma

Do prison gang bangs count?