IAma former Knight at Medieval Times AMA!

[deleted]

Nice one.

How often did you say ni?

Never, sadly.

Would you rather joust against 1 duck sized hors....

shoots self

Seriously though, what's the most common injury suffered by jousters? What's the worst injury you've suffered?

haha REAL jousters I'm not sure... everything is choreographed. Even the lance tips were cut so they looked pretty when they hit the shields. But in those cases when they were not cut right, you could take some hard hits on the elbow(where the shield is resting against) or if you take a hard hit and you happen to be falling that turn, it could make your fall extremely difficult because your balance goes out the window.

You're saying that as if it was all staged...

I think you need to know something about santa clause...

Tread carefully, ser knight...

... for you tread on my dreams. (I'm just going to assume that was the reference you were making)

niceeeee

are we being watched? reddit is safe right?

How did you get a gig like that? Were they, like, recruiting from a renaissance fair, or did you have a theater background, or what?

I actually applied to be a food server. They make bank. But their manager was out sick the day of my interview and my interviewer was the head knight (manager). During the interview Him: hey you look in shape Me: Yeah i played football and ran track in high school. Him: You ever ride a horse? Me: not once Him: You wanna learn? And maybe be in the show? Me: Hell yes. Him: You start monday.... as long as you pass the piss test

I had zero experience in all aspects

Wow, then that first piss must have really been something!

stream of legends

They make bank.

How much are we talking?

depends on the night and attendance. Ive seen 300 in one night.

I am wasting my life at this Italian place I'm at =/

its not ALWAYS that high. but more than there im sure

haha thanks for your boost of confidence. Also you are doing a fantastic job of replying to people

no problem. good luck if you try and apply. Thanks, im trying to do well for my first and probably only AMA

If you were a real knight, what would your loadout be? Sword and shield? Big 2-handed sword? Flail?

Ohhhh I miss these conversations. We(the knights) used to talk about random crap like this from time to time. It depends on my opponent. But, I would normally side with the sword and shield. Both can be used quickly and as weapons. Shield bashes can kill. One handed swords are fast and deadly. Too each his own though.

Sword and board is respectable and time honored, I tip my visor.

nice wordage

We never spoke that way but its always fun. I raise my lance to you sir

he means his penis. :D

you catch on quick

"Let us gingerly touch our tips together! "

HUZZAH

It says balls on your face.

it says balls on YOUR face

I hope some of you got the reference I was making.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVAm5KIxhcs

oh wow! been a long time since ive seen that movie. Totally forgot about this. No we do not wear real suits of armor. He makes us look like more dopes than we are

What was your favorite color knight to play?

I loved being the Lord Marshall (black knight) from the show about 6 years ago. And the green knight is always fun. He gets to be (or used to at least) a douche bag and its great fucking with the audience.

Sounds like a fun job. Thanks for answering. c:

Thanks for the questions. It really was a blast.

Thats the knight we would say shit too hahaha, thats funny you say that. He had long hair and everytime he would ride by we would be like nice flow bro sick flow. He just seemed like a douche

Awesome role to play. Especially when he gets into it. You have to!

That's awesome. I've been to medieval times a couple of times, and I always hated the green night. That was, until he was my section's champion.

Plenty of booze later we would have laid down our lives for his lordship. The servers had to quiet our entire section down; it was getting out of control. No other knight was fit to rule the realm.

Those crowds are the best. Kudos to you and that crowd.

I went to the NJ one about five years ago with a group from my college. We were in the green knights section. It was heartbreaking when he got killed right at the end :(

I was probably there working. Probably either the green one or the guy killing him haha

When I was there green knight had like a goatee thing going on. Black hair. Think he got killed by the the knight?

You just described every knight lol

Oh man, always thought it was the green knight who was evil... I guess his "theme song" threw me off when I was younger.

He was the D bag of the knights, but not the "bad guy"

Always a fun knight to be... my fav.

Why did you stop?

Not a career. Girls wont take you seriously when they realize THATS your job EVERYDAY. Not high pay. No retirement plan. LOTS of injuries...even little injuries add up.

Related, did you ever use your job to pick up girls?

dude... that job was an aphrodisiac. women loved us. Many of the guys would pick up chicks all the time. It happens a lot, and frankly isnt fair to the general male population.

I went to Medieval Times (Toronto) a couple years ago and we asked the knight we had if he used the line "I'm a knight in shining armour" to pick up girls at the bar. He only replied "they don't believe you!"

hahaha true, they dont until you show them proof.

So this whole AMA is just a clever ruse to provide proof of knighthood and therefore pick up chicks? That just jaded my whole view of the AMA section. :D

im engaged and faithful... dont be jaded

Has any kid ever run onto the arena, if not whats the craziest thing the audience has ever done?

Not kid, but a drunk dude did once. He jumped in and ran across the arena right by the "bad guy" and was just looked at funny. When he tried to jump out, he broke the plexi-glass and cut up his hand BAD. He was charged with drunk and disorderly, trespassing and endangering the animals. Other crazy stuff Ive seen range from flashing tits, to grabbing knights after the show to kiss them. Nothing TOO nuts... it IS a family show.

I almost ran out in the arena in Dallas last week ... according to my co-worker.

why?

I was pissed that the green knight laid down like a little bitch and got himself killed.

This is all heresay. The bartenders (females, especially) do a great job of selling booze.

Laid down? you mean he died....

Yeah, they have some great assets to do that

How do you decide who gets the roses? The hot women or do you try and confidence boost the rest?

Sometimes cuz they are hot, others cuz they are little girls, and the others are just random. Depends on the knight really. usually wild fans get noticed first

Oh..because, I'm not at all still butthurt I didn't get one....or anything.

many chicks get upset. keep in mind they may have not seen you. And they only have limited amounts. I felt bad sometimes when i didnt get enough to throw out to the crowd. I always asked the princess for more flowers

I went to one in Orlando when I was 5. I was super bummed I didn't get a rose, so my grandpa went and found one from who knows where and told me that the king had it specially delivered to me.

Awesome grandpa is awesome

Aww...that's the best.<3 I just chugged my giant beer in souvenir cup. It healed the pain.

glad i.. or the beer... could help! lol

I received one when I was 5 years old. My dad told me if I flirted with a knight I might get one. Flirting to my 5year old mind was waving, shyly smirking and batting my eyelashes. It worked! I kept that rose for way too long. It was the highlight of the summer and probably the beginning of my fascination with knights, magic, and that whole era. Haha. did making a little girls day ever brighten up your own day?

If I saw a 5 year old waving and doing that, she's getting a flower. When I saw those girls light up and get so excited, it really did make my day.

DAD!

SON!!!!!

How hast thee obtained access to our present day Internets, my good brave sir??

Also, dost thou joust?

A kind wizard has shown me the path to this with craft. Tell no one of this and you shall keep your life.

Nay, no longer do i joust.

I used to be a knight.. But then I took a lance to the knee? Do we still do that?

Do you like "The Cable Guy"? Did they portray your job accurately?

Awesome movie. Eh... no not really. The audience would never be allowed to go into the arean...ever. The wenches.... yeah pretty spot on. Some can get into character, but alot ive seen are like "dude... cmon"

"Would you like a refill on that Pepsi?"

They didnt have forks and knives but they had pepsi?

Dude, I got a lot of tables.

thank you fair wench

I've always wanted to go there, but I hate "participating." I want to eat and watch a fucking horse fight. Can you do that, or are audience members forced to participate?

Participating makes the experience better for everyone. Imagine everyone sitting quietly not cheering at all.... it would be lame. BUT NO, you dont have to. You can sit and just watch if you like. Many do and are not looked at funny for it. Its like going to a baseball game or football game. Your encouraged to yell and stuff. But its no big deal if you dont.

I'm ok with cheering. I just hate when they come stand over you and make you do stuff. Like... I went to a Disney restaurant and they were doing some kid's dance thing. They came over and took my kid, and I'm like, dammit, now I have to go follow him around because I don't want someone to steal him.

Noooo no, they dont do that there. Fuck that noise.

You said you had virtually no experience, how long did it take you to become a decent enough horseback rider to be in the show jousting?

surprisingly i picked up riding quickly. Few weeks and a i was a calm and confident. When I was training they didnt need any more knights in the show, so it took about 7 months for me to finally go into the show. It all depends on personal skill level and coordination

I've never been to any of these so sorry if this is a dumb question but is every day and show pretty much the same thing? How often are new shows written and changed up?

Yeah, same show day in, day out. Roughly 2 years the shows change... used to be longer but their shows and scripts have gotten seriously bad. The first show i did was in for 5 years i think. It was awesome.

Previous knights have mentioned hook-ups. Any interesting stories there?

One story I think i can tell without being yelled at by the SO... A bachelorette party came one night(no idea why) and the bride to be wanted me to be her.... last fling? She was pretty aggressive and kissed me pretty wildly. Then gave me her number and demanded to see me later. I was involved at the time so I did not lol. In retrospect I should have later finding out that I was cheated on... thats another story lol

I went to Medieval Times in NJ last year! I can't blame the ladies for hitting on you, you're very good looking!

Thanks much! You saw some of my good friends there.

Good on you for not doing it. Girl had to have been a complete fucking cunt to try and get laid at her own fucking bachelor party. Feel sorry for the guy who married her.

I do too. I hope she only did that cuz she was drunk and feeling weird about the marriage... i HOPE shes faithful

Spoiler: she isn't.

Twist: neither is he

We're you the white knight? And who chooses the winners?

I was legit every color. Usually the supervisor, or whoever is left in charge that show. If no supervisor then the most senior knight will "write the show board" to determine the whole show.

Do the fans talk shit when you trot by? I remember me and my brother used to say random shit to them when we were younger

All the time! Personally I loved it. I always yelled back. It makes the job more fun than it is. I would subtly say kiss my ass by kissing my hand and smacking my horses ass while staring at the mocker. Always got a laugh.

you're going down red knight.

fuck you i never lose..... i lie, i lost all the time

Down down down, red knight's going down!

the red knight sucks the big one!

Has anything ever happened unexpectedly and you were forced to stay in character and improv the incident?

many times. most memorable, my weapon broke while fighting a new guy, and we both didnt notice... i went to block my head and he came crashing in with a sword and WHACK.... took a sword to the face. Blood went everywhere.... the other knight froze in terror... i, dazed, went to the wall with the weapons and grabbed the next one i saw and yelled KEEP GOING!..... I was pissed so it was like 125% faster than he was expecting.... good training for him though haha

I think I just found my new favorite ladyboner.

what, knights? lol

OP as a knight more specifically :)

Why thank you!

How you doin?

am i being hit on?

No. Yes. Maybe...

yes....

Roughly how much money did you make?

Any benefits? Health insurance seems necessary...

Health insurance was ok. Not many benefits unless you count being a bad ass for a while. When I left i was making 18 an hour

I dunno if 18/hr would be enough to have huge dudes swinging medieval weapons at me all night. Damn. You'd think those guys would at least make a good salary.

18 is HIGH.... Start at 8 being a squire.... if your good enough to train you go to 10... once your in the show 12... then up from there whatever you learn and crap

Green section is the best section. That is all.

Green was perhaps my fav knight to be. I loved being a dick to everyone

How heavy is your gear? How long did it take to learn to battle?

The armor was only about 7 lbs. Motor cross chest and back with metal shoulders. Lances were about 15-20 lbs. Shields about 10. Swords ranged from 5-15 lbs. It took me about 3 months to learn everything to be "show ready"

How much of a fight is choreographed, and how much improvised? Obviously you're not trying to hurt each other, but do you have a bunch of "set lists" or are you winging it?

Also, that seems like a God damn dream job.

dream job out of high school, thats about it.

100% choreographed unless something goes wrong, then as much to choreograph as posible. When its time to improvise, you can tell... usually they will just freeze up and stare with the "wtf do i do now". Training is drilled into us, so when something is different it throws us off.

So did any of you and your fellow knights ever have beef with each other? Like anyone purposely messing someone else up out of spite? Curious to know if the rivalries ever translated from script to real life. Thanks for doing this!

Oh god yeah. Tempers flew like we were movie stars. We would scream and curse (in shows) at each other and would fucking HATE each other that day. But, when the actual fight came time, it was respectful and hate free. No matter how badly we wanted to kill each other, we knew we could seriously fuck someone up with those weapons. Or worse. They are fake but made of real titanium.

Do you have life insurance? I specifically remember the green knight dying in the show.

Real deaths... never heard of it. ive seen a lot of close calls though... buddy got kicked in the head by a horse... he got LUCKY. Minor injury. He did black out though and the show was over (it was at the end) But yea i do have life insurance. Im in the USAF Reserves so... they said i should.

Do they serve alcohol? I could see it being a lot of fun to get loaded and cheer your team on.

You better believe it. Its pricy but have a few before you go. A FEW. Dont get tanked before hand, they'll throw you out. But during the show go nuts, yell and scream. They wont care.

Can you speak Klingon?

Negatory sir.. Star Trek the new movie is cool.... but thats my limit

Hi thanks for doing this AMA.

I went to the Medieval times in Toronto for my neice's birthday, and ended up buying a 2handed Scottish clay-more($650, you people ripped me off). Please settle this for me, my 9-year old neice and I (26) have been arguing for the last 6 weeks about this... If you were to battle another knight with it, do you think a 2 handed weapon would be viable in a fight?

Not me! I dont make those absurd prices! haha

It depends on the opponent. What do they have? I prefer a one handed sword and shield. BUT, a two handed sword(bigger and heavier) could potentially demolish a sword and shield with one blow. It relies heavily on the skill and weapon of the opponent. Give me more details and ill be happy to answer

What's the food there like?

Its ok now. Used to be amazing. Most people love it. Chicken, rib, garlic bread, soup, potato, and a pastry. I think thats all of it.

Do you have any stories about picking up girls after shows or by dropping lines like, "Hello, fair maiden, I am a knight." And if so, please share.

copying and pasting here: One story I think i can tell without being yelled at by the SO... A bachelorette party came one night(no idea why) and the bride to be wanted me to be her.... last fling? She was pretty aggressive and kissed me pretty wildly. Then gave me her number and demanded to see me later. I was involved at the time so I did not lol. In retrospect I should have later finding out that I was cheated on... thats another story lol

But a favorite line of us was: Want to see my lance?

Good Guy Knight: Copies and Pastes previous answers instead of ignoring question.

I try and please them all

With your lance.

zing

You worked in the New Jersey Castle? I've been there a couple times. Great stuff! Now for my question: If I recall correctly, the knights are split up into different colors, i.e. Red, Yellow, Green, Black & White, etc. How does that process work? Do you get to select your color, or does management force a color upon you?

Yes, NJ castle. Its all on who knows what fights and who wants to do what. If that makes sense. The senior guys get to pick normally. Management doesnt get involved, only our immediate supervisor.

Do you know that guy's dad

lol no, but thats where i got the idea

[deleted]

practice is done everyday usually. Even on off days where no shows happen. Go in, warm up the horses, do some horse exercises, joust a bit, train new horses, train new guys, show fights. Basically thats an off day. Show days: show fights before the show...warm up your horse a bit, and thats it.

That's funny, the post right above yours is about someones dad getting a job at medieval times :P

I made the front page??????????

What was your favorite experience while working?

Wayyyyy too many to count. Its easy to say the things i miss most... Mainly my horse, Friend. Love that fucker. The comradery between the guys. And the fans and excitement of shows.

Any specific ones that standout?

OH! duh.. meeting my fiance! I was the yellow knight and she was in the red/yellow section. She wasnt a slutty "omg your a knight" chick and we hit it off... obviously.

More details. Make me swoon dammit.

I asked her if she knew what a princess was... she said yes of course... then i gave her my number and said, call me when you want to be treated like one..

No i wish. that would be awesome. We exchanged numbers and did the whole dinner and a movie thing and got along great. We have been in a honeymoon stage for 4.5 years now.

Do you have any memorable events during your time there? I remember when I was there one of the falcons stole a patrons meal but you must have some pretty cool stories yourself! (side note-how accurate is the game chivalry(if you have heard of it)or skyrim? Are they boring compared to what you've done?)

Oh i have countless memorable events. Never heard the falcon taking food off a plate though. thats priceless. I HAVE heard the flacon grabbing a kids head though... bled like crazy. They are serious when they say DONT WAVE SHIT AT THE FALCON. Game of chivalry...???... during the show? The games portion? Thats all on skill of the knight and chance usually. And im not sure what you mean with Skyrim too.. played it.. love it. But yeah video games of that nature are boring WHEN compared to the job. But i played the crap out of skyrim

I didn't go to your Medieval Times but I went to one for a birthday and it was fucking awesome. Thank you for making the days, weeks, months, et cetera of little kids better!

if they're happy, we're happy

pshh... i'd do this job in a heartbeat. Even if the money is crap... I applied for the baltimore castle a few years ago but never heard back :-(

I should apply again.

How old are you? Its def a blast but def not a career.

24 years old... IT consultant... bored out of my mind with this job. I applied when i was discharged out of the navy about 2 years ago. I grew up taking care of horses.

I'd do it just to have fun at a job for a while.

Go for it man. Hopefully your in some kind of shape. Its seriously tiring. If your not already in shape, they wont want you. You dont have to be jacked or anything, i just mean not overweight or look lazy if you know what i mean. You are a military man too(Im usaf reserve currently) So i assume your still in some kind of shape apply again. Youll have to start as a squire and then you can train to be a knight.

Is the king still called Alfonso? Because that was my favorite part.

No, the names all change. That was my favorite too

What was the worst injury you received?

I got lucky. Almost died a few times and almost broke my legs getting trampled by a horse. Almost snapped my knee backwards by getting kicked by a horse. Lots of close calls and minor injuries. Worst one I got was in the very beginning of a show ( i was the prince, white knight) in the very beginning of an ambush scene. I did a minor flip stunt and my down guy never supported me and I landed on my shoulder tearing my a.c. joint in my shoulder. THAT was an interesting fight. Finished it though.... not the show.

I actually went to the castle you worked at several times as a kid. It was one of the most fun things I ever experienced. So I guess instead of a question, I just want to say thanks.

Your very welcome! Fans are happy= us happy

Have you ever met the Black Knight? Did he set you on the right path as a teen and spark a lifelong dream to become a jouster? Was that really a cheeseburger I ate 2 hours ago?

I have, and he did. He was my inspiration. He was kind of a dick though

I'm not sure what you ate.

Has being a knight in shining army help you get laid?

while employed there, plainly... yes

cakedaytest

you get my upvote because

Ever seen the Tournament of Kings in Las Vegas at the Excalibur casino? If so, how does it compare to Medieval Times?

Never have, always meant to. I applied once when I thought of moving out there for a change of scenery and they told me I didnt have to audition. More money too.... ugh. So I cant fairly say how it compares.... I have heard they sing there and are a little more over the top.

I went to it once a few years ago... no singing, but it was awesome. I was hoarse for a few days because of all the shit-talk my section yelled to the other knights. I think my section was the purple Russian knight.

Food was good too... especially the Dragon's Blood (spicy tomato soup).

yelling is a plus at every show. kudos for the lost voice

I went to the one in L.A. with my dad when I was eleven. I had a crush on our handsome blue knight. I couldn't talk for three days afterwards.

thats a common problem even with legal girls... and its hilarious

How historically accurate were your jousts, costumes, battles etc? Did you have to sacrifice accuracy for safety or audience enjoyment?

I know at one point the story line was very accurate to some history in spain. Now? Its all out the window and the only things accurate are the county names and knights names... supposedly.

When I went to Medieval Times about 10 years ago, almost all members of the cast were Asian. What's up with that?

I know "Asian" is vague, but I am not a racist or a race-ologist.

Where the hell did you go? I knew of 2 russians who were Asian in Florida... but thats it. But they were fregin sick at fighting

Is this AMA based on the front-post page of the Medieval Knight

no, that was a king, not sure where. Got the idea from that post.

Proof?

I have a shit ton of pics, Ill do a side by side. Not sure how else to prove it

proof posted

My buddy is one of the kings for the Orlando show - ever do any work with cast members from other locations? Also, is the show the same for all the locations or do they each have their own variations going on?

Ive been there before... and may be going actually next week or so. Yes the show is the same country wide, unless a new show is going in, then it will go castle to castle in a few months. Ive worked with guys at the NJ castle from almost every castle in the country. Injuries take a toll and people get flown in to help out.

What's your go to story if you're talking about your time there?

Wow. So many. It depends on my situation or where i am. Usually Im with a friend who still works there so its a "remember that time" kind of like that old chris farley skit... that was awesome.

If not with them the stories range from almost dying multiple times, to almost seeing people die, to crazy bachelorettes trying to bang

How old were you when you started? Is there a job I could get there? I'm 18 years old, Male, semi-athletic but with no horse riding experience. BUT, I do not want to be the guy riding horses anyway! lol

I was 20 when i started. With 0 experience in all aspects.
Absolutely yeah you could. Youll have to start as a squire but then they will train you to be a knight. Just ask all the time to ride and learn a fight. Also, its addicting. VERY addicting. DONT make it a career

Which is the most popular of the castles? My guess is Orlando.

Also are there any Knights that take it way too seriously?

California and NJ battle it out for busiest. And orlando i think is like 3rd.

Those guys never make it to the show. They take it way too seriously and love the medieval era, but are as coordinated as a 16 year old trying to fuck. Just bad. I Love the era, but didnt speak or act that way.

Down, down, down. Red knight's going down.

The red knight sucks the big one!

My seven year-old brother totally loves medieval times and wants to ask: what weapons did you guys mostly use while fighting?

all of them! we need to practice all the time with all the weapons to get better at them all. I love the sword and shield myself.

did the common folk ever sing we will rock you?

YES.... well... they tried. The arena music was too loud, but it was fun while it lasted.

That's a nice horse you got there.

I hated that scene... and i hate you.

Woohoo Lyndhurst!

haha yup! good ol Lyndhurst. From the area?

If there was a zombie outbreak, what would be your zombie plan?

Have a full mag loaded with plenty of ammo with tons of MREs and go on lock down for as long as possible.

Just saw a guy who just got a job at Medieval Times, wondering if you know him or if he even replaced you?

http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/19gssz/my_dad_got_a_new_job_at_medieval_times_will/

I left 4 years ago about. That guy is a king.... and im not sure what castle he works at... didnt read too many comments.

I heard that they don't treat the horses that well. Can you confirm or deny?

Depends on the trainer. But ive never seen anything that made me mad, and im an animal lover. One trainer was fired for being too harsh... but training horses isnt like training a dog... you need to be dominate and sometimes crack the whip(its a crop not a whip.. just a saying)

Those horses are treated very nicely, feed regularly and in normal quantities, groomed and washed daily, given expensive medicines when sick, and cared on immediately with any injuries

I went to one of the shows you were likely at about three years ago, and I remember wondering what sort of training you had to go through for the job?

I left about 4 years ago. You def saw some of my friends though. Lots of training daily. Horse training, jousting, fights. It never ends.

I really like getting drunk and going to the later shows so I can yell at the knights, can you here when someones yelling stuff like sweep the leg and play dead or does it all just washed out by everyone yelling? I always like to think the knights can hear me saying stupid things.

You guys are the best... my hats off to you and your buddies. You make the show better for us.

During the fights, no we cant hear you normally. Adrenaline is pumping and we kind of just see each other and what we need to do next. Unless you have a very quiet show and your real loud up on the glass... yeah we hear you... youll even see us break character and laugh... happened to me all the time.. "PUT IT IN HIS ASSSSSSS" anddddd im laughing. Totally unexpected things to throw us off make you a memorable person.

How often does the King have to break character and start chastising the audience? Related: why can't you bang the plates and bowls?

Depends on the king and his mood really. Some never do it, some are all about it.

THAT NOISE!!!!! That noise is 100x louder to the horses and scares the shit out of them. When we are trying to keep those very large animals calm, and do what we want, we dont want them heard an ear piercing noise and potentially rear up and throw us off.... I wish everyone that goes there knew this.. its hard to hear them when they explain it. So there you go. It scares the fuck out of our horses

How much sex goes on in the dressing rooms?

The knights and squire have their own locker rooms. The Wenches, gift shop and princesses have separate locker rooms... unless people are sneaking off... not much.

I'm not into that kinda stuff but if I had a picture on horse with a flag like you have I would proudly present it to EVERYBODY.

I used to show it to everyone... now its a "hey look what i used to do" " WHAT THATS AWESOME" "yeaaa i know"

I only break it out on a rare occasion now.

do the actors ever do movies or tv?

Yeah, when lucky enough. One of my buddies was on revolution... minor role... he got stabbed. Still awesome though.

Are there people who come in and get weirdly in to the show. Like in "The Cable Guy"?

Also would you mind giving me a job reference? I want to be a fucking knight

People ask all the time to go into the arena. No, they cant go in the arena... insurance purposes.

I would if i knew you... and you were a good guy. lol Go apply man, no harm in trying.