I'm the guy who put all his personal data on eBay, AMA

Is there anything that you need to know about sharks?

Veganism is becoming increasingly popular among humans. Has it reached the shark community yet?

Do you accept barter currency? I would like to buy your personal data, paying for it with my own personal data.

Option to extend: I will assume your identity and move into your house while you live in my small dark room.

Sound good?

Yes I accept personal data payments.

This can be done in monthly instalments, gradually filling me in on your life.

Provide me with more details of your life and I will consider.

Do you have a cat?

I have a cat and she is lovely but I will exchange for an equally lovely or more lovely cat.

I have two cats that are slightly more than half lovely. Does that work?

Yes because that would add up to more than one lovely cat.

Tell me more.

I’m not trying to get you to give me all of your personal data for free.

I promise.

I just want to know more before purchasing.

Come on now, you need to agree a way to measure loveliness.

Metric or imperial?

Fluffiness?

I have three cats. I will not trade them, but you may pet them.

I am interested in tummy rubs, chin rubs, and ear tickles.

Are your cats interested?

Would it not make more sense to rent out your data? Since with GDPR you can revoke the access to your data at any time.

I might move to a subscription model that regularly updates on you on my latest holidays and nights out.

Assuming that you do go through with the sale (privately), are you worried that someone will ACTUALLY steal your identity or act maliciously with it? Because I doubt that a buyer would use your data simply to advertise.

Why specifically only Facebook data? Why not sell more valuable information that is not on Facebook (for more money)? There have got to be photos on your phone that are not uploaded (and probably geotagged), LinkedIn profile with professional networks, emails, etc. Some people may think that even more data tracking is in our future, so why not get a jump on the competition and consolidate your entire online profile for ease-of-access?

I was hoping they’d be really nice guys and we’d go for beers.

We could get past the ‘getting to know each other’ stuff really quickly because of all the data.

Then we could get right down to the big questions in life. (When a shirt becomes a pyjama shirt can it ever go back?)

Depending on the offer I would definitely throw in my browsing history.

I have spent the last two weeks online researching an electronic air flosser so I have no worries about doing that.

How much to get your search history from Google? How much for an itemized list of your fears?

Same thing. There's no price on that.

What do you fear?

Was the listing actually removed for breaking Facebook's Terms and Conditions? Do you know what part it is breaking?

It was removed because it 'might' break them.

Clearly Facebook just gave eBay a little tap on the shoulder.

Total conspiracy.

Have you considered mass-producing your personal data?

That feels very impersonal to me.

Have you read about our updated policy?

Who is our?

a) I have lower standards - do you have any hotish pets or farm animals?

b) Any feedback from fleebay or facewank over you not owning your data enough to sell it?

c) Any plans in future to fight for our privicy?

d) Any thoughts on the UKs stupid GDPR crap, like the European Commission breaking it then claiming it doesnt apply to them?

e) Would you do this again? And perhaps invest the proceeds to a future farm?

Well done trying to donate the proceeds! And thanks to you and your sister for being good sports here!

a) I have a very attractive cat called Mugabe that I often post about on my instagram. She is really pretty.

b) Messaged Mark Z but he hasn't got back to me.

c) I'm selling my browser cookies door to door next week.

d) Fine with GDPR as long as they stop sending me emails about GDPR. I’m in the UK.

e) I'm taking private offers. What kind of farm are we talking about? Like data farm or apple farm or…?

Oli you're amazing! All of us here at work are looking at everything on your website now, the Sarcastic Samantha is a winner! GOD you're good - KEEP MAKING STUFF -

Also, to be able to post, here is a question?

Not a question. Comment reported :)

Was there a hint of irony or raising awareness here or was it a genuine social experiment?

Just trying to make a bit of money on the side you know how it is. For a charity.

If someone decided to buy your data, would that be exclusive? As in will you sell it to more than one ?

I am selling one copy only on a USB drive. It is blue and has a picture of my face on it.

Why do people even use Facebook? 99% of the population has a smart phone. Text whatever pictures/updates you want people to see directly to them.

It’s a worthless tool where people want to glamorize themselves to passerby’s rather than their actual friends. With that said why do you even use Facebook knowing exactly what it does with your information?

I use it because it is the only way I get invited to parties from distant friends / any friends.

Did anything unexpected come out of this whole thing? Good or bad?

I received an email from a man who loved Billy Talent his whole life but had never met another Billy Talent fan. We’re swapping stories at the moment.

Also a man whose uncle owns a Rent-A-Car company in São Tomé told me his uncle would employ me until I became a citizen there.

What's your next big move?

For this or in general?

At the moment I'm living with family in London and am looking to get out.

Is it still for sale? I'm very interested in buying it but can't find pricing info. Please pm me or something. Seriously.

Sliding into your DMs as we speak.

Why should we ask you anything? Surely we have it all the answers available to download somewhere...

But it costs serious money.

This is like the 30 day free trial.

Did someone buy them?

eBay removed the listing because it might go against Facebook’s Terms and Conditions.

My mistake, I was under the impression I owned my personal data.

[Get in touch](mailto:[email protected]) if you’d like to make a private offer.

Source: olifro.st

Why?

Everyone else’s making money off it, so why shouldn’t I?

Source: olifro.st

What in your opinion was the last good Adam Sandler movie?

The Wedding Singer. We had that on DVD when DVD was like a really exciting thing.

1. Do you (objectively speaking) have any attractive female family members?

2. Can I steal you to open a sweat shop? (To harvest & sell your actual sweat)

3. Did you have even a ballpark figure on what you thought it would sell for?

4. Why are you interested in gluten-free? I suffer celiac disease and it's uncomfortable. Just curious.

5. Fuck Facebook (?)

Edit: forgot to ask about the gluten.

1. Yes.
2. If I give you permission then is it really stealing?
3. According to Gizmodo it is worth around $20.21 per user to Facebook. I ballparked my mum and dad would get into a bidding war to buy it back for $4. I hoped for at least $100 for the humiliation of it. I don't know why I'm speaking in dollars.
4. I'm not interested in gluten-free but Facebook claims I am. I'm really sorry to hear about that.
5. Please read the subreddit guidelines you can't bypass the rules by adding a ? to a non-question.

1. Thanks, it's ok. I seem to have some tolerance for it but definitely shouldn't have too much. Facebook is weird like that I guess. Maybe you viewed too many similar videos/ pages so now it's in the algorithm.

2. Sorry for the violation. Please let me resubmit. I dislike Facebook but still continue to use it for a specific purpose. How do you feel about it now? Do you continue to utilise it in any respect?

1. It's weird because I watch cat breading videos all the time. What would be alot of gluten for you? Could you have a bowl of pasta with pesto?

2. I use Facebook to wish people Happy Birthday or to find out that I forgot to wish people Happy Birthday the next day.

I'm still figuring out my sensitivity levels and am yet to be properly tested for it but have had a fair amount of success with my diet changes so far. Atm I mostly avoid gluten like wheat, yeast and barley products but yet to try gluten substitute products. I don't think i could have pasta with pesto as I have found pasta has a mild effect (& I don't like pesto). Bread and wheat cereal such as weet bix and nutri grain are not good for me. Some pastry is ok like a (meat) pie now & then. I'm Aussie so sorry if the food names are a bit confusing. I recently discovered our version of a pie tends to be quite different to the US version.

I'm in the UK and I think we have the same idea of what a pie is. For example I would not refer to a pizza as a pie. That all sounds really difficult. Are you ok?

Is your sister hot?

I don't have a sister but yes I'd say so, objectively speaking.

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Thank you?

Who actually cares? What are you trying to bring awareness too?

Did you read the original post? I'm trying to get rich and get rich quick.

Is it working?

Yes. I am much happier and richer than you already.