IamA man, that was dead twice, about 2 minutes at a time, AMA!
My short bio: Motorcycle accident. First "death": immediately after the accident my body shut down from the pain and physical damages on my body. No pulse, no breathing and no consciousness
Second "death": I was in agonizing pain after surgery so I received loads of pain killers. The pain, coupled with an immense amount of pain killers, caused my pulse to drop to around 10bpm and my respiratory system shut down.
http://youtu.be/BMXNa7RnVXE video I recorded 2 days after the accident
My Proof: http://redd.it/2x4mqm
http://i.imgur.com/PyE3Lzk.png?1 One of the doctor notes I found
All I want to accomplish in life is to have fun and make other peoples lives better as best as I can.
No personal achievement will matter to me once I'm dead, the only thing that will live on after my death will be my impact on the people that are still alive. And hopefully my impact will be positive! :)
Is there anything you want to do after you die again?
Hit that respawn button!
Did you know you were dead when everything went black? Or did they tell you later that you had died and you were like ohhh that's what that was?
I had no idea, like I said, it was just black emptiness. No thoughts, no consciousness, nothing.
The only reason I know is because the doctors were obligated to share the information with me. "So yeah, you were dead for a couple of minutes, just fyi" hahaha
So if the doctors wouldn't have said anything I would've just thought that I took a dreamless nap
This is what terrifies me about death. I cannot grasp this concept.
I think that's why religion is a great way to cope with it. But an even better way of coping with it is to just accept the fact the death is death. Once you're dead, that's it, it's over.
death is death. Once your dead, that's it, it's over.
Says the man who died twice. :)
Good luck man and a better recovery from now on.
Hahahahaha dammit, I forgot to tell you. There is a respawn button ;)
That's pretty usefull. Obviously you clicked it right in time,...twice. Ah, and thanks for doing this AMA btw it's pretty interesting and just a bit scary...
Thanks for the kind words! I hope this helped in some way
What's your opinion on the experiences of people who report having consciousness after death? NDEs and such?
I think that in their cases, their minds were still active. What they experienced was just a sort of dream.
The description of black emptiness is fascinating.
Do you feel you 'experienced' this time of black emptiness or is it more that, your MEMORY of the experienced was - pain, pain, pain, GAP IN EXPERIENCE, pain, pain, pain?
If there truly was nothing, your experience would have been nothing, not even black emptiness. I wonder if that is just how your memory has filled in that 'blank'.
It's a really hard one to get my head around! Congrats on being alive!! :D
Damn, that's actually hard for me to answer. It was definitely not just a gap. Much like a dreamless nap, you don't just wake up and feel like time just jumped ahead. You know that you've been asleep for awhile. At the same time, you can't really remember experiencing anything at all, unless you had a dream.
So yes and no. I experienced something, and that something was nothing :D
And now I'm completely terrified of death. Gonna try to do everything I can to live forever BYYYYEEEEE
hahaha damn, the whole point of this was to try to make people understand that death is nothing to fear!
It's hard for me to find comfort in an endless sleep and nothingness, like I cannot comprehend being nothing if that makes any sense. I'm an atheist and do believe when we die that's it, we're no more but the thought of becoming nothing and no longer having consciousness truly scares me.
So did you feel yourself drifting away from consciousness or was instant, like unplugging a lamp and it's off?
As far as I can remember it was just a sudden off/on switch sort of thing
easy for you to say, being invincible and all.
All you have to do is accept that death is what it is, a part of life, then you will understand that it is nothing to be afraid of
I think this is the most clear description of that "experience of nothing" I've ever read. You really made it click for me.
Maybe I should write a book? hahahaha
It's a lot like being blind. You don't see blackness, because that's contradictory. It's "nothingness", but still incomprehensible.
That terrifies me and is comforting all at the same time...
Yupp, I felt the same way. Just think of death as a nap and you'll be fine :D
I always feel like crap after my naps. So hopefully not!
Well, you won't have to wake up from a death-nap ;)
I know a band name when I see one.
I've died a few times from heroin overdoses, same circumstance, no breathing, barely beating. My experience was the same. I didnt even get the chance to acknowledge that i was dead. Its not that i was seeing black, its that i wasnt seeing or thinking anything, just like you. Im clean mow, but my question is, was your accident death the same experience (or lack thereof)as the overdose death? And did you have any preconceived ideas about an afterlife?
Glad to hear you are alive and clean!
yes, the two experiences were exactly the same. The only difference is that the accident one, I remember the seconds before a lot more clear. The second time, I was in so much pain that I wasn't really fully aware of my surroundings if you understand what I mean.
I never believed in an afterlife, but I always hoped that when the time came that I would be proven wrong!
This is what fascinates me about death. It's actually quite a peaceful ending.
Death = peaceful. Last moments of your life right before you die, maybe not so peaceful
Have you heard of the 7 second theory? Where 7 seconds before you die you are in a dream like state, and since you are in a dream time can dramatically slow down. What if you are still dying from the first time and the second time was when you really died but they just used a defibrillator to temporarily get your heart started again. What if you are dying right now and never woke up from the first time? Also I am very bored
Hahaha well then this dream really lacks imagination, and lacks all the hot celebrities that should be taking care of me!
Actually never heard of that theory. How could anyone possibly know if that's true? :S
Next time you die, as soon as you wake up write down what you remember. I know for sure that sometimes I do dream but later in the day I forget. good luck with that
Hopefully, I never die again ;)
Do you plan on going for the hat trick?
Trying my best!
Well, we can all agree you certainly have at least one more in you. If you don't, you're going to be a doing a very different ama in about a thousand years.
Has your near death experience changed how you view or live your life in any way?
I focus a lot more on just trying to live in the moment and have fun. Sounds cliché but that's basically it.
Also, I used to think about things that could kill me and be afraid/cautious. Like the risk of being electrocuted and be afraid of how easily something like that could kill me. Now I still think about the risks of death/injury but I don't really care. If I die, then I die. Sounds like I'm suicidal haha but I'm not, there's just no point in dwelling on stuff like that.
It's not suicidal, it's apathy. Though, I don't think you're apathetic. You understand what it's like to die, and choose not to live in fear of dying, and just live in the time that you have to enjoy. You don't want to die, it seems like, you're just not scared of it. Nothing negative about that at all.
Yeah, exactly. I've just noticed that when I explain it, people automatically think I want to commit suicide. Accepting death and seeking death are two different things imo!
Are you religious? Did the accident change this at all?
I have always been an atheist, but I have always had a part of me that hoped there was a God or Heaven or something greater than us. I mean, who wouldn't want there to be a Heaven? :D
I am still an atheist, and now I know that there is no such thing as God or Heaven. At least not for me. My reasoning behind that is no God would ever put a person and family through such a experience. I mean, that would be one fucked up God hahaha
I am an Atheist, and always will be. But I believe that your belief is YOUR belief. The only thing we can share is our own experiences and let people make up their own mind. People need to stop forcing their own beliefs onto others
Well said man. Couldn't agree more. "If there is a god, he's going to have to beg for my forgiveness" - written on a concentration camp wall.
To say there is no God because there is no afterlife is too much of a jump in conclusion to be fair.
To say there is a God because of your own belief is also a jump in conclusion. But everyone has their right to believe in what they want
Were you away before you died that you were in the process of dying?
I'm guessing you mean "aware" and not "away"?
Well the first time was right before the accident and the only thing in my mind was "oh fuck"
The second time I had no idea. I was in pain and all of a sudden there was nothing, just no life. Then I was awake and in pain again.
Yes, I did mean "aware"
And also, that's interesting and somewhat comforting. When you go you just, stop everything. That actually doesn't sound horrible as I'd always imagined it would be
Same here, I always imagined different ways of dying and how painful certain things must be. But once you're dead you won't even remember the pain. It's a weird thing that something so depressing can still be so comforting ^
It's fascinating to me that when you die, your body just shuts down completely. You would think that your brain would keep something going for a moment that you'd remember, but instead it all goes kaput. I always thought that during beheadings that people kept conciousness for a small moment when using the guillotine, but of course I could be mistaken.
Hmmm well even if you would keep consciousness for a small moment after getting decapitated. Once your dead all that is gone. You wouldn't remember anything. You wouldn't even think about not remembering anything haha it would just be nothing
1.) Has your body suffered any permanent damage?
2.) Will you continue to ride motorcycles?
- It's still too early to say. My knee was completely crushed and that is the only body part that hasn't fully recovered. I can bend it to about 110degrees now, but it's a work in progress.
You'd be surprised on how resilient the human body really is, and how good it is at repairing. I had a broken back, torn-off shoulder, 5 broken ribs, a punctured lung, a disassembled ankle, I think that's about it. Everything has recovered to 100% except for my knee, and that's pretty awesome!
- I want to continue riding motorcycles! But I won't. It's too painful to see how it affects my family and friends. No amount of joy in riding bikes will ever be enough to put my family and friends in such a situation, if you understand what I mean. My english isn't that great ^
Your English is great, you big silly goose.
That's really nice of you to consider. I had a friend pass away on his motorcycle. We all told him not to get one but he did anyway. It wasn't because we thought motorcycles were dangerous. We just thought he was a terrible driver. So kudos to you for thinking of friends and family.
Sorry to hear that. At least he passed away doing something he enjoyed, I guess that's a good thing!
Were you scared before you died or was it just so fast there was no emotion?
It's hard to say if what I felt was fear.
Hmm I'll try to explain. You know that feeling when you're about to sleep and you feel like you're falling and you WAKE UP. That's what if felt like right before I crashed. Just a sudden shock. I don't think there's enough time to process the information and connect the situation with an emotion. You just feel that something's not right.
I hope that analogy works haha
I recognize half of your description, but I had a different experience of the other - I was once run down by a car that was going over the speedlimit - I didn't see it because there were a couple containers standing on the side off the road blocking the view of what was incoming, and being in a hurry and mentally distracted passed them without checking for oncoming traffic. Being on a bicycle, I was flung into the windshield, and bounced off into the air before dropping from about 3 to 4 meters hight and god-knows how far away from the impact zone, temporarily knocked unconsciouss by the hit to the windshield. I remember not being frightened the slightest, but neither peticularly shocked. The only thing I remember was turning my head and realising the car was heading right towards me relatively close, and calmly thinking "I'm not going to make it" - Not meant in the sense of "I'm going to die" but more like "I'm not going to get across the road". It always struck me as an incredibly banal thought, at least for such an encounter that could easily have gone very wrong. I was ridiculously lucky and got away with a broken leg, some glassshards in both legs (one of which has never healed properly), and a heavily bruised pelvis. I didn't even suffer a concussion, I was just knocked out. It wasn't a very severe crash, but I of course had no way of knowing when it was heading for me, it might have just as well gone at anything from 60 mph to 20, and I wouldn't have a clue. Kinda strange, thinking that you could possibly end your entire life with your last thoughts being the equivalent of "damn, I forgot to turn of the stove".
Wow, I'm glad you managed to survive that incident so well! Yeah, it's quite strange that your last words really might not be as cool or epic as you would hope - like in movies. If I had died in my accident, my last words would've been "oh fuck". It really is strange when I start to think about it. Thanks for sharing!
I have an idea of what you mean. :) But, wow that's crazy. Sorry you had to go through that. TWICE.
Every experience, good and bad, makes you a stronger person if you have the right attitude! I hope this AMA is helping people try to have a more positive outlook on life :)
What do/did you like to do to keep yourself occupied in the hospital?
Most of the time, begging for pain killers and just hoping for the pain to disappear.
As the pain got better, I watched about 100000000 movies! My favorite movies are The Dark Knight Trilogy. The impact that movie had on me during my time at the hospital was unbelievable. Seeing Batman get destroyed in the last movie and having to recover in order to climb out of that hole, man it really felt like the movie was telling me to fight this and climb out of my own little hell.
Best advice: music+movies that empower you
Did you bring anything back with you from the other side?
Accidentally brought back Hitler..... but no worries, he's locked up in my basement!
How do you feel about organ donations before and/or after your accident?
My thoughts on organ donations are unchanged. I want to donate my whole body. I believe that it's super selfish to hold on to your organs when you have literally NO use for them. Do something meaningful after death and help save others lives.
"If I donate my eyes, I'll be blind in the afterlife" is probably one of the many excuses for not donating organs. I think that's fucking idiotic. I would rather go blind in the afterlife (if there is one) and help someone. And seriously, blind in the afterlife? How good can the afterlife be if there is a chance for you to be blind.....
To run with that thought, does that mean if you die of cancer you'll keep the cancer in the afterlife?
That would kind of suck a little bit.
What if you die with diarrhoea? Would that mean you'd run around in the afterlife shitting everywhere?
Did you have a thought of 'this is it' just before you died or did your mind just suddenly turn off?
The only thought I had was the words "oh fuck". There was no time to think about what could happen.
"Oh fuck" then just black emptiness.
Soup or salad?
Soup during winter
Salad during summer
Do you fear your inevitable final death more or less now that you've experienced what it is like to die?
I remember almost drowning when I was 10 and trying so hard to get above water until I just kind of accepted it and it was almost...nice after that. I hope my final moments will be like that instead of trying desperately to claw my way from the abyss, screaming.
I definitely fear it less. I know now that death is nothing worse than sleeping. When you die, you just stop existing, nothing to worry about!
Well, obviously when you're at your final death and perhaps burning alive or something, it WILL be terrifying and painful. It will be living hell. But after a while it will all be over and you won't even have that memory to haunt you!
How did the conversation go when the doctors told you that you had died? And what was your reaction?
Well my first reaction was "omfg, that's fucking cool! now I can tell my friends that I've been dead and come back to life etc" but most of those thoughts was the morhpine talking ^
Then reality sets in, and I realized that "wow, I could've been dead right now." That's when I started to understand how serious my situation really was
I died once due to septic shock following an appendectomy, can we be friends?
I'll send you a friendship bracelet!
- Were your family told that you were dead ?
- Or did the doctor just arrive at the conclusion and was like 'What the hell ?'
- Do you think that you are possibly immortal ? 😁
Well, I was only "dead" for a period of about 2 minutes at a time, so no. But they (including me) were informed later on when I was stabilized that I had been "dead".
Well this sort of thing isn't that uncommon apparently. The doctors knew exactly what to do to Frankenstein me back to life.
Haha NO! If anything this experience has shown me how MORTAL we really are. There is no way in hell that I thought I was ever going to be close to death before I hit like 60 years of age. I am 22 and already almost lost my life :)
If you died, wouldn't that make you only a few days old?
Well, in that case I know a few girls that are going to jail for child molestation.... hahahaha ^
You player, you.
Whoops, I meant to write "a lot"
Holy shit you look on situations so positively. Good on you man.
A negative attitude, no matter what it is, is only going to be an obstacle :)
How often do you masturbate?
As often as I can! brb...... ;)
What was the cause of your motorcycle accident?
Well long story short, construction workers forgot to put warning signs on the freeway, I came on my bike at 90km/h in a turn and saw the obstruction. I had nowhere to turn so I hit the brakes and bam.
Did you sue?
Working on it!
Since you were only dead for 2 minutes, did you ever ponder on the thought that it could take longer to pass on to the afterlife seeing as you were resuscitated by the doctors in a short space of time?
Well I've never believed in the afterlife to start with, so no, that never crossed my mind
Do you still plan to ride your motorcycle or are you switching to a safer mode of transport?
No more bikes for me, at least not in the near future. It affects my family and friends too much
What did you think when you woke up after your accident? Were you surprised you survived?
I woke up lying down on the freeway, with paramedics surrounding me. I honestly thought that it was a fucked up dream. Everything was blurry, nothing was clear. That was right after they shocked my heart back up. Slowly everything got more and more clear and I started remembering my motorcycle crash. That's when I realized, shit this isn't a dream. I was scared of dying, but that quickly disappeared as the drugs started kicking in. Then I was in the ambulance talking about random shit with the paramedics, having fun! :D
I've been in a pretty bad car wreck. Good paramedics make a world of a difference. The good ones know how to make you laugh or calm you down. They rock.
Indeed! They lighten the mood and make you try to find happiness even in the darkest of times
Since your deaths do you feel like you want to settle down and have kids and all that? Of you don't already.
No no no! I am only 22 so if anything, this has made me think that I want to live MY life first, before I bring someone else into my life. Also, this experience was quite challenging both physically and mentally, and it still is, so I really can't afford to spend time/energy on someone else. I need to focus on getting back to 100% before I can even think about caring for someone else :)
what if you're actually dead right now and this is all just a dream :O
allright real question incoming here: do you think your accident will (has) change(d) your life? and in what ways?
Then this dream sure sucks compared to my other dreams with Jessica Alba, Olivia Wilde, and so on... hahaha
I've answered that question earlier, please refer to that post! :)
Wow have you ever passed out? Is it like a pass out?
Yeah I passed out as well during my stay at the hospital. I would say it's very similar, but passing out wasn't at all exhausting.
Sorry to hear about the accident. Is there any proof that you actually died though? Is there any proof you actually flatlined?
Yeah, I have hospital journals with records of everything that happened. But I'm not planning on sifting through 50+ pages of text to "prove" my post. You can chose to believe me or not
So when you actually die, you will have died 3 times, assuming you are not revived again?
Hahaha damm, that means my IRL KDA will be lower than everyone elses :/
Could you please provide some additional proof?
That photo only shows someone in a hospital. It does not show that you are that person, or that the person died.
Here's a selfie I took when I arrived at the hospital. They wanted me to call my parents from my phone before going into surgery. The fucking hilarious guy I am, I say "but first, lemme take a selfie".... So I took a selfie and uploaded it to instagram. But I was SUPER HIGH on drugs and in shock! haha
Let me try again, as an atheist I am interested in knowing what, if anything you saw when you were dead. Please go into details:) What did you see? If anything?????????
I am also an atheist, and always have been.
I saw absolutely nothing. No dreams, no light, nothing. Imagine just black nothingness and that's what I experienced.
I know it sounds depressing as fuck that when you die there's absolutely nothing, you just disappear. But honestly, this has made me fear death less. When you die, you just die. No more worries, none at all. That is the greatest peace you will ever find, no heaven could ever match that I think.
True and I mean it is really just a motivator to get the most out of life, like right now I am 19 and haven't really accomplished anything so of course I am terrified of dying. When I am older I will have accomplished more and thus I won't be as terrified of death. Sorry for my grammar.
I am 22 and I too haven't accomplished anything really. But you shouldn't worry about that, just live your life and don't regret anything. In the end, you'll be dead. No accomplishments are gonna make you feel better once you're dead :) haha
True, but its always nicw to leave things behind, for others to enjoy.
Yes, that is true!
Awesome quote: “If you're not making someone else's life better, then you're wasting your time. Your life will become better by making other lives better.”
Are you saying that you had an experience of "black nothingness" when you were "dead"? Like, there was awareness, but what you were aware of was the nothingness?
No, not really. I would describe it as taking a dreamless nap. You know you were asleep, but you can't remember anything and you weren't conscious during that sleep
It doesn't seem like you've suffered any PTSD. Has this affected you mentally in any way? Like does the incident come up in dreams?
I've had 3 instances where I completely broke down mentally. I started crying and literally my whole experience since the accident all the way up to the present flashed through my mind like a movie. However, this isn't classed as PTSD since that is the only symptom I've had. Otherwise, I am happy and have no problem talking or thinking about the whole accident. But those 3 times, something triggered that negativity all at once and took over my mind
I hate to play devil's advocate here where there are a pack of circlejerks about, but wouldn't you say that you could be furthering your atheism by telling this story just as Christians further theirs?
I am not forcing my belief on anyone, I am just sharing my experience. I opened an AMA based on my experience, whether you join the thread or not is up to you
On your gravestone, are you going to go with all three of your deaths, or just the last one? I don't really know the etiquette on things like that.
I'm think of getting 3 gravestones, that feels like the right thing to do huh?
Was this the final straw for you to stop riding a bike? I've been considering buying a motorbike for a few months now and the only negative is the safety aspect of it. Do you regret riding a motorcycle?
No, I do not regret it. It is so fun, and I had lot's of good memories from it! Everything is a risk, life is a risk. You just have to decide for yourself whether you are willing to take that risk or not. If you decide to do something, stick with it and don't ever regret it!
Did you experience anything mentally when your body shut down ? God ? Tunnel ?
I wish I could say yes, but the truth is that both times I was just "not there". It was just all black. I would describe it as when you take a nap. A short nap with no dream, you wake up and it feels like you've been sleeping a long time, when in reality it's only been about 15 minutes. Also, I was extremely exhausted when I "came back to life". It felt like I had just completely used up all the energy I had in my body.
So you didn't experience blackness... you experienced timelessness. That is why I have been scouring this thread... that is what I experienced when I died. It just felt like forever had passed when I woke up and in realty 10 seconds did.
I guess you're right! It's hard to find words to describe the experience. Timelessness seems right, but I find that also extremely hard to grasp my head around ^
Did dying change anything about you, such as personal preferences or anything?
More confident in life, for sure. Getting nervous for an event or something, there's just no point in getting nervous. Obviously, I knew that before and still got nervous. But now I think, "hey, I could've been dead right now, so what the fuck does it matter if I fuck up or say/do something wrong?"
Otherwise, I think I'm the same person.
Minor thing: I hate some foods now because I connect that specific food with a specific moment during my stay at the hospital. But that's not a big deal :)
Are you hoping to find a 1-Up before you lose your last life?
Hopefully more than just 1-Up!
Do you have any regrets or has it all melted away into mindful bliss? nothing would make you more present than death!
I have no regrets!
What do you think about the more fantastical stories of death experiences, seeing heaven/Angels/and such?
I can only judge my own experiences. Much like you guys, I have no idea what others have experienced in those situations. As long as you are true to yourself and find a way to cope with your situation, then that is the ultimate truth/experience.
I wish I saw Heaven, and met my little sister. That would be truly amazing!
I didn't see it asked already, however were you wearing any gear when the accident happened?
Yes! My helmet was cracked which saved my life. But all other gear only helps against road rashes and crashes at lower speeds. When you're going 90km/h, which I was, no knee pad is going to help against your motorcycle crushing your knee and so on ^
Wear gear, it does help. But don't think that your gear turns you into Iron Man!
Wow I am waiting for such an ama for so long
what religion do you have?
Do you believe hard, or are you just part of it?
Did it change your view on religion and church?
Where are you from (enoug if you say the continent I guwss)
Did you see anything how your religion tells you the end is coming (for example hell or heaven)
Did you hear anything from "real life"?
Atheist My view on religion is the same I live in Sweden I saw nothing during my "death" and heard nothing from reality
So there is no light at the end of the tunnel? Or there's no tunnel at all?
Nope, or maybe that's what they were building on the freeway? ;) haha
Before you "died" what were you thinking? Did you start to feel a calming presence before you passed out?
I had no idea that I was gonna "die", all I felt was pain
Tell us about heaven?
Looks just like this
I have no idea what you tried to do there.
Whoops, it was a picture of heaven ;)
You were technically dead for 2 minutes according to the Doctor, how long did it feel for you? Im glad you are okay
It felt like a good night's sleep :) Several hours
So I'm 24 and thinking about getting a motorcycle but shit like this always gives me second thoughts! Should I still get one? Glad you're safe now though, if you need any help just text it lol xoxoxox <3
If riding a motorcycle brings you happiness, then do it. Just keep in mind the risks you take. But life is a risk so do whatever makes you happy and never regret you decisions!
What did you see when you died?
Google image search "black background", that's basically it! ^
Is there anything you want to do before you die again?
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