IamA Chuck e Cheese Game room Attendant AMA!

Former Chuck-E-Cheese employee here as well.

Be very VERY germ hygiene aware if you haven't already been informed. CEC's tend to be highly contaminated environments due a constantly influx of kids running around and slobbering on everything.

After working there about 3 months, I ended up catching mononucleosis and streptococcus b at the same time. My throat was so completely ravaged I had to goto the ER because I couldn't even swallow water.

Keep safe.

thank you for the info, i'm keeping hand sanitizer in my pockets from now on

Oh you poor thing.... :(

it's hell on earth, but thankfully only temporary

Tell me a funny story that happened at work.

i left a brick of tickets sitting on a game that needs two keys to open, so i went to the front, got the keys, and when i get back, there are tickets on the floor and the kid i was helping had stuffed most of them in his shirt and pants.

or the time chucky got tackled by 2 kids who i heard were planning to take him out.

Did u let the kid keep them? How old was the little bastard

I did, he was only about six.

Have you ever tossed handfuls of tokens into the change bucket at a bridge toll just to get out of paying? (...will you now?)

i might have to try that.

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Ours doesn't have a ball pit, but given the area, i don't want to think about what we would find if we did

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probably the skee ball lanes, or the nfl 2 minute quarterback drill.

Do they still have that snowmobile game. That was kickass.

We don't, unfortunately

How often do people without kids come to Chuck E Cheese? How old/creepy are they usually?

Not too often, and when they do, its usually just them showing up late to a family night, thoug some people definitely do give off a seriously creepy vibe.

You ever do coke off a machine?

sometimes i wish

Any pedophiles try coming in chuck e cheese?

i can't judge based on appearance, but most people coming in do look like they could be pedophiles

So what's your most entertaining story?

A birthday party threw chucky down and pulled his head off.

Their tears were beautiful.

How dare you leave this story like this. We need details man...DETAILS!!

Kids knocked chucky down and started tugging at the ears, so the person in the suit had the idea to hide their head in the shirt, when the head came off, the kids started screaming and crying and freaking the fuck out because they just ripped chuckys head off. The person running the show put the head back onto the person in the suit, and the party went on as normal, but the kids were fucking terrified.

Tell us about the brattiest kid you've ever encountered at work and how you kept yourself from murdering that little shit?

I know two kids were following me around because I had a pocket full of tokens to test out the games,and they kept asking me for some, I just ignored them... then they started screaming at me to give them tokens, all I could do was continue working and ignoring them. I wanted to brain these kids with the skee ball.

Are any of the games rigged?

I swear to god any roulette or wheel game we have is rigged to fuck you over in the most efficient way possible

Any techniques or methods beat the system?

Waiting...

Screw that, I'm talking about a full Chuck E Cheese ticket heist.

I meant I'm waiting for him to respond.

No tricks, all luck

I've never been to a Chuck E Cheese. Is the food as shit as I hear?

It used to be a lot worse, its just sort of "okay" now

Do you guys know im lying when I tell you I hit the jackpot and nothing came out?

I can usually tell, I just dont really care.

What's worse, the kids or the parents?

The kids aren't bad if you understand that when they get angry its because they dont necessarily know any better, whereas the adults that act like that are the complete opposite.

So, its probably the parents

Have you ever let some people play unlimited on certain game machines without them having to pay?

we had one game that would start every time you pressed the coin return button.

What's the worst event you've ever had to experience with your job?

I got punched in the balls while in the costume today, but I dont know if thats the worse.

Have you had any funny things happen with the Animatronics?If you don't have those then Just Chucky himself

Oh god a Chuck E cheese commercial just came on as I commented

We have one animatronoic chucky that a kid tried pulling the shirt off of, I dont know why.

Do you ever get tired of the animatronics? To such an extent that you just want to go batshit crazy and destroy them?

I've never truly considered arson until now

I was one too. At the end of each day I had pockets full of coins and when I quit, I must have given over 3000 to my little cousin.

But my question: What is your skee ball high score?

76000

Ever bang the person in the Chuck-E-Cheese suit while they were wearing the suit?

I always hear about parents getting into fights there. Any fight stories?

This question comes up with my friends so often. No, I havent given anyone in the suit the old in-out in-out, and im not planning on it, it seems a bit terrifying, like if you had sex with someone in a full Ronald McDonald outfit.

As for the fights, we have our share of little kid fist fights, but I have yet to see the parents do anything to each other.

Is that a Clockwork Orange reference? Should we be concerned for you?

It is, and you shouldn't

What happens when the kids fight

Tears and parents giving their kids hugs

How much puke do you clean on a monthly basis?

Puke isnt that bad actually, now mens washrooms at the end of the night are another story entirely

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The place I work has a 1 cent = 1 ticket deal going, so its not that expensive unless you're going for top of the wall shit.

As for the games, people tend to just sort of stick things where they shouldnt go.

What game has the best odds at getting the most tickets?

Any of the coin drop ones

Does your paycheck clear every pay-period?

it's cleared every time i've done it so far

Do you feel like a bitch at your job? Serious question

the bitchiest

Do people still do that trick where they pull out the tickets from the ticket counter repeatedly to get a large amount of tickets?

One group of people fucked up our ticket machines with that trick.

I worked at chuck-e-cheese for about 2 weeks. It was the worst experience as an employee ever. There was an old lady that worked the "check-in" station that's a total No-Fun-Nazi and when I went in for my interview she almost refused to let me in, disrespected me completely (don't remember exactly what it was, but it was something with my haircut that she didn't like and straight up told me that I couldn't get the job because I looked gay?) I reported her to the manager, she apologized, but they didn't fire her because apparently she had some mental problem? The work itself wasn't difficult, but it was just alot of things at once. If i worked as the "expo" that delivered the pizzas to the tables, I also had to bus them all, clean up the drink station, make sure the salad bar had the ice in a certain way and clean all the bathrooms. I also got to wear the suit, do the dance, and make it rain (tickets) on all the small prosti-tots. During my "dance" i nearly kicked a kid in the head with chuck-e's huge ass foot because the mask didn't allow me to see any person shorter than 4 feet. I was about to start running the birthday parties, but after my training for those was when I had my last straw. Some kid shit on the floor in the bathroom and proceeded to still clog the toilet to make it overflow. I didn't do anything about it, clocked out, and called in the next day saying I wouldn't work there anymore. Their employees are pretty much disposable, and the ones that make it to management positions are asshats who can't get authority anywhere else. But my questions are: A) Do you at least have managers that respect you and aren't always up your ass to do something that they could easily do instead of nagging you to do it? B) Do they limit the beer to 2 cups per adult max but can still be cut off at the cashiers discretion before that?

The answers to the questions are yes and yes, as for the shitting on the floor and clogging the toilets, that kid needed serious help.

Any stories of 'classy' parents fighting?

There was a middle eastern couple who came in with their kids, and about a half an hour after they got there, they started having a heated discussion in what I believe was hindi, but I could be wrong. It ended in yelling and the husband leaving, the wife was fuming.

I have no fucking clue what the were talking about, but their kids just went nuts with laughter.

How much do you want to have sex with someone while they wear the head of the mouse?

Even if it were emma watson and Jennifer laurence, its still a no

Have you ever slept with a co-worker? If so was it inside the restaurant?

I have not, there are security cameras everywhere

Are there cameras in the play place? Like in the tubes and stuff?

I don't think so

Do you also have to wear the extremely homosexual traffic vest for gameroom now?

No, thank god

Have you ever had to wear the mouse costume?

An hour ago I was in that costume

What did it smell like?

They keep it fairly clean, so its not bad.

Have you ever done drugs during or before your shift?

I have not, but if my friends found out about the head, theyd probably try to get their hands on it and hotbox it

Please elaborate?

Im friends with major stoners and they love filling shit like motorbike helmets with smoke, if they had their hands on a chucky head, smoke would be pouring out of every orifice like this guy: http://i.imgur.com/AysIV.jpg

What was the worst and/or most disgusting thing you've seen a child do?

A kid shit his pants in the sky tube and went down the slide.

Did you have to clean it?

Thankfully, i had just clocked off when it happened

Do you guys still have the cameras rigged around the store that the kids could control and watch people

We dont, we had to get rid of them

What do you think of your commercials? Be honest, you wont get fired.

i honestly don't watch enough tv to ever see them

what is your favourite menu item containing bacon?

I dont think we have bacon on our menu

Ever ejaculated feces, sir?

Can't say that i have.

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honestly? i don't know what i'm doing at this point