I started driving back in 1977 and been chasing the entertainment business since then.

I've worked for rock bands, the metropolitan opera, symphonies, ballets, trade shows, all kinds of folks in the entertainment industry.

I've driven people like Willie Nelson, Alan Jackson, Doobie Brothers, Jethro Tull, Captain & Tennille, Ronnie Milsap.

I also turned down the Kanye West tour for this Without Their Permission bus tour. We just left Bloomington, IN and we're on our way to Nashville, TN right now -- ask me anything! (I'm driving, but /u/kn0thing is typing)

My Proof: http://imgur.com/8htl0Sm https://twitter.com/alexisohanian/status/434344093485785090

Update: we just got in to Nashville and I gotta sign off for a bit. Thanks, everyone!

Comments: 331 • Responses: 63  • Date: 

CupcakeTrap145 karma

Bruce Lane, has anyone worked out your secret identity as Ratman yet?

Bruce_Bus2 karma

not yet keep on building it

jisforjoe74 karma

Hi Bruce. Nice and toasty here in back :)

Bruce_Bus71 karma

Just kick back, relax, read the funnies and count the monies.

archars29 karma

Are you redditing and driving??

Edit: oh my god Alexis just talked to me. We're best friends now.

Bruce_Bus44 karma

Alexis here: No, he's driving while I read the questions and type the answers.

cat_sweaterz39 karma

Hi Bruce, long time listener first time caller. What would you say is the most annoying thing about /u/kn0thing? Are most of your Bruce-isms made up on the spot, or are they one's you've been using for years? Do you have a favorite one to say?

Bruce_Bus51 karma

He loses his wallet daily.

Most of them have been accumulated over the years. Just gotta wait for the right situation to plug them in.

"Every days a good day, if you don't believe me, just miss one."

unanymousholdeng28 karma

Do you eat mac and cheese with a fork or spoon?

Bruce_Bus100 karma

Fork. People who eat it with a spoon probably have a lack of balance.

jisforjoe22 karma

When are you gonna let Joe drive the bus?

Bruce_Bus20 karma

Today.

the_combover21 karma

Does u/kn0thing just clean-up on college campuses? And does he at least have the courtesy to hang a laptop charger or something on the bus door?

Bruce_Bus86 karma

Hehe. No, Alexis couldn't get laid in a whorehouse with a pocket full of hundred dollar bills.

Skippy889819 karma

Any crazy fans try to sneak on the buses? And why did you turn down Kanye West?

Bruce_Bus46 karma

That happens. Not on this tour. We were in Lincoln, NE and there was a guy (I forget who we were on tour) he was trying to slip on the bus, but he had some shitty credentials and he was busted. It's never hot women doing it -- they don't need to sneak on the bus.

I turned down Kanye to go on the reddit bus.

Anthematics17 karma

On a Scale of 1-10 how aware are you that your name sounds like Bruce Wayne?

Bruce_Bus22 karma

10.

karmanaut16 karma

How do you deal with driving in a big city with crowded streets (like NYC)? I have a hard enough time with my car, and I can't imagine doing it with a giant bus. What are your insider tips?

Bruce_Bus33 karma

We have a saying in our business that "size of the vehicle determines the right of way." You just have to be on your toes. Anticipate other drivers, especially in bigger cities. You'll get yourself in a bind in a hurry. Boston and Chicago are both pretty tough to drive in because they're both old cities, with limited access for commercial vehicles throughout and they're both crowded.

Dr__House16 karma

Bruce Lee! You're dead though...

Edit: Facepalm.

Uhhh. Whats the worst accident you've ever been in?

Bruce_Bus12 karma

I haven't had any too bad ones. The only accident that I really remember was this one time in Lincoln, NE. There was a car in front of me, snow everywhere, I went to take off, she stopped, and I caught her taillight. I really haven't been in any other accidents. Feel pretty lucky. knocks on wood

Dr__House9 karma

Wow. I would think someone who drives a car for a living would have been in some major accidents. Then again someone who drives a car for a living is probably a lot better at driving than I am. Much respect, thank you for answering.

Bruce_Bus2 karma

I have been extremely blessed when it comes to driving. Hopefully the rest of my days will be safe sleding as well I'll keep praying Thanks for the great question

jacquelinesarah16 karma

Can you estimate how many gallons of old fashioneds Joe has downed on the tour so far?

Bruce_Bus22 karma

I don't know how many he's snuck, but I'd say he's probably drank a couple of gallons.

cat_sweaterz14 karma

What tricks do you use while driving to deal with boredom, sleepiness and general uncomfortableness.

Bruce_Bus73 karma

You drink a lot of coffee, talk to yourself, try to answer yourself.

That and freebase.

Karma_for_username13 karma

How long would it take to get the bus up to 88 MPH?

Bruce_Bus21 karma

Depends on what the terrain is. 3 or 4 minutes on flat ground.

hypotheticals13 karma

What's the worst weather you've had to drive through, and how did you get through it? Same questions, but what's the worst terrain? Also: how the hell does one drive in snow? I live in NC so we just had a depressing taste of what happens when a bunch of people don't know how to drive on ice/snow. Also: favorite stop on the WTP bus tour? And why?

Bruce_Bus46 karma

Worst weather I went through was back in 1979 up around Lafayette, IN. It was probably 12-15" of snow. The roads were covered. The National Guard shut the highway down and they were on snowmobiles helping people out of their cars.

We ended up getting off an exit and found a hotel. And there was a guy who had a load of beer from Milwaukee who got stranded as well. It was so cold, they told him to "take the top layer off" and we didn't let that beer go to waste. We had no choice but to drink it all. There were a bunch of college girls stranded at the hotel there, too. It was a real good time.

Worst terrain is on Highway 89 going out of Utah. It's just a windy 2 lane highway coming down this pass, deer running everywhere, it's just a steep-ass tough drive.

How do you drive in snow? Very carefully.

My favorite stop was UNC. Great bunch of people who showed us a good time. And then the fact that Asa got challenged by a girl to pushups in a bar (they tied).

BoilerUpx5 karma

From Purdue, can confirm that weather here is crazy.

Bruce_Bus2 karma

thats mother nature . Like the mailman rain, snow, sleet, we gotta go

LegendaryMuffins11 karma

If all the artists you've done tours with, which was the most unexpectedly wild?

Bruce_Bus18 karma

That's a tough question because sometimes it not the artist, it's the entourage. Most of the artists would end up in tabloids and shit, they're pretty secluded so you don't see them out and about. I'd say Jethro Tull. Back in the day, those guys were party maniacs.

TLeezy1311 karma

If you could drive anybody you wanted to around for the rest of your life, Who would it be?

Bruce_Bus32 karma

Warren Buffett.

Alexis commentary here: It did not take him more than a second to come up with that answer.

glglglglgl11 karma

Hi Bruce, what's it like to be a multi-millionaire, protector of the people of Gotham and also, where did you get that fine suit from?

Bruce_Bus10 karma

it's good, I just like to have the millions.

ramencat9 karma

Bruce, you are the wise uncle I never had. I wish we were related. What's some advice you'd give to a young lady who's feeling a little directionless in life, in terms of career and love? Lay some knowledge on me.

Also, can I do a documentary on you? Being stuck on the side of the road for 12 hours doesn't count.

Bruce_Bus15 karma

Do what you love. Chase what you love. And then, love will come if you let it.

Sure.

12 hrs on the side of the road? (Just realized who you are) We can start there!

shazzdeeds8 karma

There's a rumor going around you wanted to curb stomp a N.O. hotel employee for accusing you of not knowing how to work magnetic keycards. True or False?

Bruce_Bus12 karma

That's true.

xMGMT7 karma

It's been said that Willie Nelson can outsmoke /u/Here_Comes_The_King, just how much weed did Willie smoke?

Bruce_Bus22 karma

I don't know if Willie knows how much he's smoked. Garbage cans full, I'd say.

Bruce_Bus2 karma

I never asked him ,but I know that he smoke a bushel basket full on the roof of the white house . when he was invited there by President Jimmy Carter

tragic-waste-of-skin7 karma

[deleted]

Bruce_Bus27 karma

Some of the memorable things are when you see fatalities on the highways.

I was in Florida for example -- remember when Firestone had the tire problem? -- I was going across Alligator Alley and there was an Explorer that passed us and blew one of the tires out. Flipped over on its top, right in front of us.

We ended up getting out and there was family in there, 5 people, and we got two kids out and the wife. And the father -- his foot was wedged in the floorboard of the vehicle -- we got him out, too. The mother-in-law was in the back, dead.

You never forget things like that.

Someone told me later that the family was on 60 Minutes in a story about that tire problem.

bokbok4547 karma

Prevost or MCI?

I have to say driving a Setra after MCI was quite the change.

How are your driving requirements different than mine were as a charter driver?

Bruce_Bus11 karma

Prevost.

They're basically the same driving requirements, just a different crowd in the back. In this case, a bunch of nerds.

banana_questions7 karma

Do you like bananas?

Bruce_Bus6 karma

Yeah I like bananas. They're good for you.

TheLighterDr6 karma

Wow, The Captain And Tennille. Those must have been some wild times. Who pulled in the most tail?

Bruce_Bus8 karma

They were really conservative times. They were really laid back and didn't do anything extreme. It was a real husband + wife crowd.

Jon_Oro6 karma

How exactly did you "get in" with driving for celebrities and such?

I ask because I do personal chauffeur and sometimes valet services, driving is something I consider second nature (I'm still a conscientious driver though).

Bruce_Bus11 karma

I was at the right place at the right time. The place I went to, that's what they did. Back in the 70s it was regulated business by the government. This company had the authority to haul 'theatrical' - I think that's what it was - and that's how I got into it.

What kinda license do you have? Because you really need a Class A license to get into it.

dummystupid6 karma

Who has been the worst offender/offensive breaker of the no turds in the toilet rule in your 36 years?

Also, who gets hit with the charges if your bus is pulled over and the passengers have drugs?

Bruce_Bus3 karma

I don't know who did it, but it was on one of the crew buses last summer on Alan Jackson's tour. No one fessed up to it.

Never happened. Probably me. I really don't know anybody that's happened to. Maybe Willie Nelson's bus got busted once. It was all a misdemeanor….

Snacksplz6 karma

Why do you drive, Bruce?

Bruce_Bus7 karma

To get a different shot of scenery every day. The scenery is always changing and it beats working in an office looking out the window.

bstandturtle77906 karma

How was navigating through the small streets of balcksburg, VA?? Go hokies!

Bruce_Bus10 karma

That was pretty easy compared to Georgetown and New Orleans.

Alexis note: Wahoowah

CaneCorsoG5 karma

[deleted]

Bruce_Bus5 karma

No. Never did.

shazzdeeds5 karma

Have you fully recovered from Brian and Jack's departure from the tour?

Bruce_Bus6 karma

We haven't found any hidden treasures since you left.

jisforjoe5 karma

Where can one find the best lot lizards?

Bruce_Bus9 karma

I don't chase 'em, so I don't know.

muppykisses5 karma

Hey thanks for doing this. Curious: What is the absolute worst/most stupid driving move you have ever witnessed someone make on the road?

Bruce_Bus9 karma

I had a guy that was driving the wrong way on the interstate one night at 3am, coming head on at ya, at 60mph, definitely gave me that crazy feeling. I moved over, he missed me, I don't even know if he was awake, or sleeping or what it was the wee hours of the morning.

We called 911 to report it and it'd already been reported. The things people do...

muppykisses3 karma

Omg. Crazy.

Bruce_Bus2 karma

all aboard

jacquelinesarah5 karma

I vote that the #WTPbook tour should end with you and /u/jisforjoe in a bus-off. I don't know how drag racing works but I bet it'd be pretty sweet.

Bruce_Bus4 karma

I think that's a great idea. If you supply Joe's bus, we'll ride.

Parzival_Watts5 karma

Hey Bruce! What's the most beautiful/stunning thing you've seen in your travels? Also, I saw you guys in Middletown CT. It was a great time.

Bruce_Bus7 karma

The most beautiful/stunning thing I've seen in my travels? Man, I'd say the Grand Canyon. Took a helicopter ride in it and just thought it was amazing… formed over all these years… really beautiful.

vartanm5 karma

Do you have a favorite song to listen to, while you drive?

shazzdeeds4 karma

Is there a list somewhere on the internet where I can read all your witty one-liners of wisdom? "Slicker-than-deer-guts-on-a-shotgun-barrell"

Bruce_Bus4 karma

Not yet.

Alexis note: this man needs a book deal. Follow Bruce on twitter @Bruce_Bus

MrChocholate4 karma

So when I see a bus like yours on the road, how do I tell if it's a bus filled with celebrities and debauchery, rather than a bus filled with tourists?

I often see big rigs like that in town aligning with a rockstar, and I got excited, but then it turned out to be a bunch of people from Japan. Not that they aren't rockstar worthy, but they sure weren't headlining a show!

Save me from future disappointments, Bruce!

Bruce_Bus6 karma

Most of the tour buses are the 54 seat capacity and you can tell by the windows if they're upright seats or not.

Tour buses will have the closed in sides for the bunk/privacy areas.

cat_sweaterz4 karma

What's your favorite stretch of road that you enjoy driving on, and try to hit while on tours?

cat_sweaterz8 karma

Did you hit it on this tour, or did /u/kn0thing and /u/jisforjoe deny you that pleasure?

Bruce_Bus10 karma

They denied me that pleasure.

Is that Michael?

cactuscool2 karma

As a former La Grande resident, this makes me happy to hear

Bruce_Bus2 karma

That is a beautiful road 1 of the best in america congrats you know what I'm talking about

mimid3161 karma

The gorge is beautiful. Terrifying in the winter, though.

Bruce_Bus3 karma

in this business you can't be a fair weather driver Bus driving ain't for sissies

heron274 karma

How many people have thrown up in the ride?

Bruce_Bus8 karma

Too many. (not because of car sickness, but because of over serving themselves -- not on this tour, though)

trimspace4 karma

Who was the craziest band you drive around and why?

Bruce_Bus13 karma

The Doobies, simply because I was with them a long time. The more you're with somebody the more things happen.

In the day, the Doobies probably had one of the best followings of beautiful women of all the bands.

trimspace6 karma

Did they just pay you retainer, or did it just work out to tour with them so long?

Bruce_Bus9 karma

I work for a company that contracts you. So they'd be on a 9 month tour and when the tour was over, I did another tour for 3 months before they went back out.

PRGrl7184 karma

How did you get introduced to the bus industry driving for all these famous folks? How'd it all start?

What band/group has been the most interesting to drive and who would you like to drive next?

How do you find free time to do what you want? What do you do?

How often are you on the road throughout the year? Do you get to see your friends and family often?

Bruce_Bus11 karma

Just being a part of it. It's networking. You work with different people and companies.

The most interesting band I ever worked for was called Skillet. They're a Christian rock band who I'd never heard of, but they're a really awesome band that's been around since the mid 90s. We played this outdoor venue in PA, and it was sold out -- like 10k people, I couldn't believe it. They partied pretty hard. Especially their crew guys.

I think Sheryl Crow would be a fun chick. I'd like to tour with her next.

cbpiz4 karma

Did the Doobie Brothers live up to their name? Did they share?

Bruce_Bus14 karma

You know, despite name, they were really not big druggies. Tommy was kinda the guy that wrote all the songs back in the day and he actually was on heroin and was booted out of the band for a period of time -- went through rehab and ended up coming back.

Most entertainers will share.

chadsykes4 karma

Who has the smellier farts? Joe or Alexis?

Bruce_Bus4 karma

The honest answer would be I don't know. But I think the consensus is Alexis leads the parade.

Arr22234 karma

Hey what's the craziest thing a famous person has done on your bus? Groupies? Parties?

Bruce_Bus14 karma

Craziest thing? Well, a lot of that happens behind me so I probably missed it. Big parties, mostly -- some of the people you think would be the tamest or the quietest, well, once they get out, they let their hair down.

BestGingerEUW4 karma

At a first glance I thought this said Bruce Lee

Bruce_Bus3 karma

now try it with your eyes opened

l_AM_NOT_A_COP4 karma

Hey Bruce,

Since you have probably seen a good portion of the states from doing so much driving, what have been your favorite places in the USA? Longest road trip?

Thanks for the AMA, I'll be sure to say Hi when you stop in Athens OH!!

Bruce_Bus9 karma

Seattle is one of my favorite places. Portland. Northwest, I kinda favor it.

My longest road trip has probably been 13-14 months. I was gonna go home for Christmas but I couldn't get out of LA so I ended up staying there.

hammayolettuce4 karma

What's it like being Batman?

Bruce_Bus3 karma

Awesome.

cat_sweaterz3 karma

Would you rather fight 100 duck-sized horses or one horse-sized duck?

Bruce_Bus43 karma

I'd say the small ones. I think you have a better opportunity of winning against 100 duck-sized horses. I'd run them over with the bus.

iMelon2 karma

Hi Bruce! I had dinner with you when you came to UMD. I remember Alexis said that you had some stories that you simply couldn't tell us at the time--do you remember what those stories were?

Also, what is the craziest thing that's happened with this crew?

Craziest thing ever on your bus?

Bruce_Bus7 karma

The craziest thing on this tour was our night in Times Square. I thought that was a pretty good night. It involved a t-shirt cannon from the roof of the bus.

One of the craziest things I've seen was a crew one time that had some game they were playing, like where if something happened you to take a shot. It started out when we left the venue and then a little while later when I stopped to get fuel I looked back and a good 6 guys were passed out laid out all over the back of the bus. I don't know what that game was. It was pretty loud for a couple of hours and then boom. Everyone was done. On the floor. Everywhere.

Alexis note: Bruce also told us that 'what happens on the bus, stays on the bus' for his celeb clients so we can't get all the details of the juiciest stuff until he retires….

TheSwampDweller1 karma

Hi Bruce did you know anything about Reddit before the tour?

Bruce_Bus2 karma

Nope. Never heard of it before, saw it on the bus.

RexBaba1 karma

Hello Mr. Lane - thanks for this AMA.

1.) Did you have to take any specialized driving courses (maybe something similar to a more practical stunt driver)?

2.) What is the most unique maneuver you've done while driving with a client? Is there anything that stands out?

Thanks again!

Bruce_Bus2 karma

1) No, I'm self-taught.

2) Just 70mph swerves when someone cuts you off or something. The old Eagle buses were built different and they were more responsive. You could go down the road and if you moved the steering wheel a certain way, you could roll them out of the bunk. If you had someone on the bus that pissed you off, wait til they went to sleep then roll em out of the bed.

Swyguy1 karma

Bruce, thanks for doing the AMA. What is the most unique thing about the WTP tour you are on now? What is the craziest Asa story you have from WTP? Keep it going strong Alexis and go 'Skins! (Hopefully Alexis recognizes this user name!)

Bruce_Bus4 karma

It's pretty laid back compared to most tours.

The best Asa story on this tour was him meeting [redacted] in Vegas and then again in LA. After seeing her, we realized who got the better end of that deal ([redacted]).

kiez3211 karma

i actually mistook your name for Bruce lee ... i don't suppose that happens to you a lot?

Bruce_Bus2 karma

It does. Yeah.

mikepig881 karma

Does your bus have wireless internet? Cuz it be hard to reddit without that Another question, ever had someone have sex while you drive..... And then join them and high five the guy? Thanks

Bruce_Bus2 karma

We have wireless and all the goodies of life. I am sure that many have had sex on the road while we are at a full tilt boogie