Comments: 200 • Responses: 39  • Date: 

sexy_barbecue26 karma


TokiDokiHaato21 karma

Almost none. And the one's that are, are very hit or miss. I might attempt seeing someone soon, because it's becoming a problem for me. My pulling used to be so minimal no one would know, but I saw my mom after several months and she asked me if I was pulling my hair again, so, I can only assume it's become noticeable.

Honestly, I don't think about it. It's almost like a habit. Sometimes for example, I will be driving and all of the sudden there's a pile of hair on the steering wheel and I am kicking myself for pulling so much. Right now, typing responses at least keeps my hands away from my head during idle moments so I can't pull. I will occasionally get on kicks where I will try to stop pulling and one of the things I do is play video games so my hands are always busy.

silverlara35 karma

It is considered a fairly treatable disorder by psychologists. I encourage you to seek out some help to overcome it!

3dogalan28 karma

I am a psychologist and I agree with the above. This is OCD behavior which can be treated and controlled.

TokiDokiHaato0 karma

I recommend checking out http://trichworld.ning.com/main/authorization/signIn?target=http%3A%2F%2Ftrichworld.ning.com%2F

Probably the largest online site of people with trich. Most of us have tried medications, treatment, etc but it's not that easy for everyone. Where 1 person responds well, there's 10 other people who have given up because it didn't work for them.

mindfulmu6 karma

I have an odd concept so follow along. What if you could do behavioral therapy and coupled it with a realistic doll head with hair. Like with smokers who still have an oral fixation but eat an onion or chew a pen?

Then again you'd be that chick walking down the street who's yanking hair out of a dolls head while smiling.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Hard to describe but with trich there can almost be this sensation where you feel the need to pull just one more hair, or find just the right one to pull. Sometimes it's the texture, the spot...I don't really know. The doll hair probably wouldn't do much unfortunately : /

Blue_Hulk2 karma

I am also a psychologist, and this is very treatable! If you were my client I would not treat the trich, I would go after what is driving the anxiety. The trichotillomania is a symptom of your anxiety. Go and talk to someone, explore what is at the root of your pain, you'll see the trich get better. I've answered some questions related to anxiety on my Iama's. Take a gander! And good luck, you're not alone in this!

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I actually have been diagnosed with some other issues, but the thing is, even on medication I find the pulling lessens for a bit and then comes back. Someone mentioned this could be due to the dosage not being high enough? I've also heard of some people having luck with a supplement recently but I cannot remember the name of it at the moment.

With me, I've found the best thing that ever helped was just actively keeping my hands away from my head. It has gotten worse recently so I've been debating seeing someone.

aerial198120 karma

Are you seeing a therapist?

TokiDokiHaato-43 karma

No. But at the same token, there's not a lot that can be done for this disorder. Most medication doesn't work and therapy doesn't do much.

Allikuja3 karma

Well that's certainly a defeatist attitude. Self-fulfilling prophecy much?

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Or the attitude of someone who has tried this and saw very little results or none at all.

Allikuja0 karma

I thought you said earlier you haven't seen a therapist for this before. Plus the other thing you have to remember is doctors are still people. My first therapist was great but she moved to another state and the one I had after her I hated so I just never went back. Meeting a new therapist in 2 weeks (it's only been like 8yrs).

TokiDokiHaato2 karma

Not this particularly. For other reasons, but the trich was mentioned.

Allikuja1 karma

Did it help at all with the other reasons? Also not all doctors are gonna be equipped to help with all kinds of mental disorders. Somebody with schizophrenia will need very different therapy from someone with OCD, for example.

TokiDokiHaato0 karma

No and I've found it never has over the years. On and off treatment since I was in high school. Several different doctors and counselors and nothing that ever did any good other than my own willpower to get better.

BfmVfan116 karma

I have it, self diagnosed, but I pull it out of my mustache, goatee, and nose.

My girlfriend gets mad at me, but I can't stop, I'm trying my hardest, I've done pretty good of late.

What's the longest you've gone without pulling any hair out.

TokiDokiHaato17 karma

Longest I have gone is about 2 weeks and it was really hard!

I did what I call the "hands off" method. If you find your hands in ANY of your hair, send them immediately to your lap and keep them there. This is the ONLY thing that worked, but you have to be really proactive about it. Unfortunately I never am, and continue to relapse after a few days all the time. It gets really frustrating.

My boyfriend and family get upset with me as well but I mean, you know...it's not so easy.

It's pretty rare to see men with trich, but there's communities out there if you need people to talk to! Even on reddit there is /r/trichsters . We all try to help eachother with methods on stopping and new treatments popping up!

nubbynz7 karma


TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Interesting, this gives me hope that maybe one day I can stop or almost stop again. I'm lucky enough to have insurance and haven't heard about hynotism before. Not sure if it'd be covered but something to check out :D

oppaihime5 karma

Do you ever do it when you are around other people? And have you considered cutting your hair short to keep yourself from pulling?

TokiDokiHaato4 karma

I only pull by myself or people I am very comfortable around. For example, I would never pull at work but if I am home watching a movie with my boyfriend I will start pulling. He occasionally catches me and tells me to stop. I hate being caught, but I appreciate it.

I'm honestly afraid to cut my hair. To be honest, cutting the rest short feels like the ultimate defeat. I touch so little of my actual head that cutting it all seems like I let this all get the best of me. The hair I pull is ALL short anyways. I pull from the same areas so nothing I ever pull out now is long hair but stuff that has regrown recently.

On top of that, seeing a hair dresser is frightening. I have been cutting my own hair for years for fear of what someone might say about the state of it all.

oppaihime4 karma

This is understandable, I cut my own hair as well, mostly because most of the hair dressers are stupid and I ask for a trim and they end up taking quite a few inches off, or giving me awful looking bangs. I'd rather fuck up my own hair, thanks. I also have a horrible habit, when I am anxious or nervous I scratch, usually my ankle. My ankle is covered in scabs and icky scars, right now it's wrapped in gauze so I can't scratch at it, and my fiance scolds me if I take it off. The only thing I've found that helps is slapping my hand when I notice it, and ignoring the urge to scratch. I don't know if that would work for you ask well, since they are very different problems, caused by different things, but it's always worth a shot, right?

TokiDokiHaato4 karma

You might actually have: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dermatillomania It's a really similar disorder to trich and lots of people suffer from them both simultaneously. I really think there's a pretty good link between a lot of these "grooming" disorders. Hopefully someday we can find a solid answer and treatment.

For now, all I can suggest is when you have the urge to scratch, keep your hands busy or away from the target area. I know it's hard, but it's the best advice I can give.

oppaihime3 karma

That is interesting, I didn't know that existed, and it definitely sounds like what I do, haha. I've been in therapy for a really long time, and it's been helping loads, it's gone way down from where it used to be.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I have been on and off. I found SSRI's helped for the first week or so I took them and then my body got used to it and the pulling started again. I really equate this stuff with things like nail biting. It becomes a habit and you HAVE to break it or you will continue doing it.

Monopolized1 karma

My girlfriend does the same thing, she has been pulling her hair out since she was 8 or 9. I catch her sometimes.. and she looks at me like she is ashamed, however I couldn't care if she had a full head of hair, or if she was completely bald. I know she can't help it and most of the time she doesn't realize she is even doing it.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

My boyfriend catches me a lot and it's not so much being ashamed as feeling bad I couldn't stop it myself. I really do appreciate him telling me to stop.

ringofphoenix225 karma

When did you start pulling? Was it because of emotional stress or trauma?

TokiDokiHaato6 karma

I was very young the first time I started doing it. Probably around 8 or 9 and I can't remember the initial reasoning behind it. I remember being very young and my mom telling me that only crazy people pulled out their own hair. So, I must have been doing it enough that my mom felt the need to mention it.

I remember it dropping off for a long while between middle school and early high school. During my senior year, I started pulling again and as I have gotten older, it has only gotten worse. I used to think it was stress related, but even on days where I feel not very stressed I find myself doing it without realizing. I find it's more similar to OCD than something caused by trauma. And actually, I find the more preoccupied my hands are by stress or real life, the less likely they are to go towards my hair and start pulling.

cyberwired4 karma

Woah damn this timing is perfect!
My 2 year old daughter started pulling her hair out probably 3 months ago.
She used to have lovely hair down past her shoulders that we could tie in a pony tail.

Here's photos of just when she started pulling (or just before) and what she looks like now. http://imgur.com/a/D4IMO

We've asked the doctor and looked online and most say its a habit she will grow out of but do you have any advice?

One thing we've wondered about (and a few friends have suggested), is just shave her head so she can't pull at all and break the habit?

She pulls mainly when sleepy but she'll do it when she's asleep (or eyes closed and in bed at least). Often pulls it then plays with it in her fingers and rubs it over her mouth.
If we push her hands away she gets quite upset and insistent that she must do it.

Hope you manage to figure out what can stop it for you!

TokiDokiHaato2 karma

She looks like such a sweetheart! What a cutie.

"Often pulls it then plays with it in her fingers and rubs it over her mouth." This is definitely pretty normal for trich. Hers is definitely a bit worse than mine. I don't think she'll grow out of it, and head shaving isn't really the answer. I'd recommend finding a psychologist and getting help that way.

Also, please don't yell at her for doing it. One of the worst feelings when I was younger was my mom scolding me for pulling my hair and telling me "only crazy people pull out their own hair".

Best of luck to you guys.

quittersspit4 karma

My mother also has trich, my question is, is there anything an outside source from a loved one can do to help with relieving the stress that triggers it? I've never seen her more upset then when she couldn't stop pulling enough that she had to wear a wig to my sisters wedding.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

The most you can do is like you said, be there for her. Maybe help her keep herself busy if she finds she's pulling a lot. If you see her with her hands in her hair, remind her to stop. She might seem upset, but she'll appreciate it.

herpty_derpty2 karma

Holy crap, I had this when I was in my teens/early 20's. I didn't even know there was a name for it. I started doing it when I busted my head open. I had a big scab, and I started picking at it. Coupled with my growing anxiety issues, and it got worse from there (I started picking at my facial hair). I don't know how or why the urge went away - it probably ceased when I was on my meds, which I'm no longer on - but now, I pretty much have to shave my head because I've got some baldness.

I do still occasionally pick at the facial hair though in nervous situations, but it's never for long. The hair growth in that area is still fine.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I had it go away for quite awhile at one point and then show up again in early adulthood. So it's possible for it to come and go or being triggered again by stress.

MoreOfPl0x2 karma

How severe is your particular condition? Based on that photo you seem to have very short hair, so do you pull it enough to keep it that short all around your head?

TokiDokiHaato7 karma

Actually I have very long hair! Check out my other photos under my submitted. I only pull from my crown, so besides the very top of my head, everything else is longer. Most people don't notice and if they do, they don't say anything. I wear hats a lot to cover it when I go out.

It's hard to say how severe mine is, because I have never seen a professional. The fact that my crown is so sparse and I can't stop despite realizing the damage I am doing to myself, leads me to believe mine has become quite severe but I haven't seen a professional so it's hard to say.

MoreOfPl0x2 karma

Thanks for the reply! As a nail-biter myself I think I know sort of how you feel, I bite my nails almost subconsciously now, and rarely ever notice I'm doing it. Have you ever tried wearing a hat all the time, to catch yourself to help you stop?

TokiDokiHaato3 karma

I tried hats and actually wear them out a lot to cover up how sparse the top of my head has gotten recently.

At home, if the hat is knit, I will reach through holes in the knit to pull. If it's felt or something...I will likely just take it off when I get home and then pull. It's awful.

Because_Bot_Fed1 karma

What about getting extensions and just letting yourself pull at those until you can get help?

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

To get extensions, there has to be hair to attach them too. I only pull from the crown of my head so there's really just short little hairs up there.

madcow448202 karma

Hope this doesn't come across as naive, but why not shave your head? Nothing to pull; perhaps break the compulsion over some time before regrowing it.

Has anyone ever tried this?

eagles972 karma

Im repeating another comment of mine but its embarrasing enough having bald patches and it would defeat the purpose of trying to hide it and or avoid confrontation about it by shaving

madcow448201 karma

It would defeat the purpose of trying to hide it, yes!! In fact, own being bald for a while. Don't you think all the anxiety that comes with pulling the hair would just, by proxy, disappear?

Please don't think I am being unsympathetic. I would just consider this a medical condition, necessary to do until you beat the problem.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

For a lot of people too, they will start pulling from other areas. I don't pull my eyelashes or eyebrows at all like some people do but not having head hair could move the area I pull from.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Lots of people shave their heads. I don't have the guts to do it, I have pretty long hair otherwise and can cover it with hats and such. I don't think I could ever go through with shaving my whole head.

tictactoc1 karma


TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I hear you. It used to be pretty mild in my case and I would lie and tell them it was breakage from my flat iron. Not so much anymore.

venn1771 karma

When my hair is long I sometimes chew on it and every once in a while pull it out. Didn't realize this was a thing, though.


TokiDokiHaato2 karma

Chewing on it is actually another disorder but part of the trich spectrum. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichophagia If you do this often please be careful as it can lead to severe health issues in the long run. I've always been at least a bit grateful I don't eat my hair like a lot of sufferers do as this is really dangerous. The human body cannot digest hair and creates "hairballs" of sorts that can get impacted in your intestine and create problems. Please talk to someone as soon as you are able to <3

venn1772 karma

My hair hasn't been long for, like, six months now. And even when it is, I only did it every once in a while without thinking about it.

TokiDokiHaato2 karma

Alright! I went into mom-mode lol. If it ever gets any worse, at least now you know though, right. Although thing is, no one with this disorder actively thinks about it. I went from occasionally pulling a hair or two to the state I am at now. So just keep an eye on it.

nebno61 karma

Obvious solution. Buy a hat? Not trying to be rude but it's one more layer you have to go through to do it.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I wear hats. If they're knit, I will pick through the holes in the knit to pull my hair. If it's felt or something I'll just pick hairs out from underneathe it. It's not that easy unfortunately.

bewilderedherd1 karma

What about wearing gloves all day? Depending on the climate where you live, of course.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I would probably just find a way to pull while using gloves to be honest.

bedlinen1 karma

As someone who suffers from debilitating OCD, I feel your pain. What medications have you tried? Zoloft seems to have helped me a lot.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I was on Prozac at one point and it seemed to help for about a week and then the pulling came back full force.

J_de_Silentio1 karma

I have a very mild case of Trichotillomania. I used to pull out pieces of my beard hair, until I realized that I was going bald in section. Then I started pulling out my nose hairs. Social stigma about one picking his/her nose keeps me from doing it when I'm around other people. Also, there aren't that many hairs in my nose, so my supply runs out.

Question: Do you pick the hair on other parts of your body, or just your head?

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

I just pull from my head. A lot of people pull from their eyelashes and eyebrows, I think I'd almost prefer this because I could cover it with makeup.

cementedshoes1 karma

I know a girl who is getting amazing results from having a weave put in her hair. It's allowing her own hair to grow back, and it is also a reminder not to pull when she feels it against her scalp.

Have you looked into similar treatments?

Hope it gets easier for you.

TokiDokiHaato2 karma

I've thought about it, but there's not a whole lot of hair on the crown of my head to put a weave into. I'm not really sure how they'd go about doing it lol.

SlouchingTiger1 karma

I have a mild case of Tourrette Syndrome. (my tic is tightening up my shoulder/bicep) I don't necessarily have to do it, but if I try to ignore it the desire to do it gets worse and worse. The tic is like an itch and doing it scratches it, I guess. Anyways, is that what Trichotillomania like?

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Somewhat. There can definitely be feelings of needing to pull that one hair, or somewhat of a relief feeling when you do.

thedarksyde1 karma

I have a method that helps, I call it the Michael Jackson method. I put medical tape on all of my finger tips. This makes me feel the behavior, and triggers a memory response that makes me remember I need to not do that. However keeping the tape on your fingers is a bitch, and people ask you why you have it all the time. The reason I call it the MJ method is, he is why I thought of it. From this style...


TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Love this lol! Something to try at home maybe.

ballaabdul1 karma

I have dermatillomania, it really sucks and I tend to agree with you that an active hands-off approach is the only way I have found that remotely works at helping me stop. Treating the underlying issues is of course important, but even when I find that I am mentally and physically well, the urge, or rather, the irresistible impulse to pick is still present and very hard to ignore.

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Yep, I've found it's become really habitual. I can be having a great day and the second my hands are idle they will go straight to my head without my even realizing it.

daringconfection1 karma

I also find myself pulling hairs and chewing on them. What would you recommend doing?

TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Be really careful about chewing them because this can lead to some serious problems. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichophagia

I would see someone about it if you have a chance. Otherwise, the best thing I ever found to do was just keep my hands away from my head as actively as possible.

Niteowlthethird0 karma

You have my sympathy, honestly. But shit. I may be becoming a jaded callous asshole, but I recommend you go for a stroll through the ICU at your nearest hospital. Or the burns ward, or the children's ward. See people with real problems. You pull your hair out with your own hands and you want sympathy? Fucking shave it off then. Hey, people might think you are receiving chemo therapy and you'll be raking in the IRL karma.

I'm sorry I know this is a serious problem and personal suffering is all about perspective. You have my best wishes, if you need to talk or something don't hesitate to message me, and I'm realising I may be losing my shit a little bit. All the love to you.

TokiDokiHaato2 karma

I've spent some time in the hospital for unrelated issues to trich, and yes there are people worse off. Problem with trich is a lot of people are really ashamed of it and for a female, hair can be such a big part of fitting into society's norms if that makes any sense. Most people aren't willing to talk to anyone about it or seek help so it can be really lonely. Having noticeable bald spots or pulling your own hair out to the point where it creates open wounds on your own head isn't really something I wish upon anyone.

And yes, perspective. I don't think it's fair to tell anyone their problems aren't "good enough" essentially, because someone else is worse off. There's always going to be someone worse off. I'd be careful with this attitude, especially in the case of those who might have untreated mental illness, saying things like that can be really damaging. But to each their own really. :D

Joshuwar-3 karma


TokiDokiHaato2 karma

Actually I have found that smoking makes the urge to pull more prevalent. I wouldn't be able to tell you a scientific reason why here, and I doubt any studies have ever been done on it, but I will go pull crazy when I am high.

[deleted]-3 karma


TokiDokiHaato0 karma


But honestly, yeah, and it has nothing to do with this :D

[deleted]1 karma


TokiDokiHaato1 karma

Fair enough! But I have seen it. I didn't care much for it lol. I did like Hairspray though!