Hello! IAmA 45 year old American woman who has been in some area of the sex industry since I started stripping at 17. I love my work. Not all aspects of it are great all the time, but that's any job. AMA.
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Comments: 364 • Responses: 85  • Date: 

QueefBuscemi69 karma

I see you've starred in Mouth Meat 9. Do I have to watch Mouth Meat 1 through 8 to understand the plot or can I jump right in?

realkaseygrant7 karma

🤣🤣🤣 That's a good one. I was also in Screw My Wife 173 (I think that number is correct.) Enjoy.

dashauskat69 karma

Total earnings for the year?

realkaseygrant544 karma

Last year, I made like 350k.

[ETA: LOL at the downvote at my income. I've never had a downvote that I know of. Sorry, not sorry?]

Bigredsmurf29 karma

serious inquiry about the income!

how do you structure your income for tax purposes, with that large of an income even if it is all cash you will still have to report some.

do you run an LLC or S-corp to build up bushes expenses to offset the income that you do report?

realkaseygrant34 karma

It's not all cash. About 60%. I do own an LLC. I don't really want to get too in depth with that particular topic as I'm still working on last year's.

VG8846 karma

There's a perception that women wouldn't want to do porn unless they had to, and that men in the industry prey upon those women. But I've always hoped that at least some of them really liked it, and took the power for themselves rather than just being told what to do by men. But the perception persists that women just wouldn't really want to do this even though men might.

The question is: what are your attitudes about sex and the largely male-oriented focus of the industry? Is sex in your personal life significantly different from sex in the industry? How do you see the power dynamics and how do you feel about it all?

I've wanted to ask these things for years but have not known how to do so.

realkaseygrant87 karma

Some of them really do like it. Some women are empowered by it. Many educations and better lives have been paid for with all of these jobs. That benefits everybody. However, the industry does attract broken and damaged people, and they do get taken advantage of at times. It's like anywhere else on Earth, though. People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you, for the most part. If you can't fight for yourself, it isn't really safe to be anywhere, and definitely not in porn with nobody to look out for you.

Most porn is made for the male, and being a male in porn is SHOCKINGLY difficult, and I don't recommend it ever. I wish I could say that it was in any way good for the men in it or who consume it, but I don't think I can honestly. As the de facto sex education of the modern era, boys are learning all the wrong things and the wrong ways. (I'm working on a project that I hope will repair some of that, though.) I have always felt that the women in most of these settings were taking advantage of the men, not the other way around. I strive to not do that and provide a fair exchange of goods for services.

Sex in my personal life is not even the same activity. I need sex at home at least once a day, hopefully more than that, and it doesn't matter if I have worked or not. It's not even comparable.

shdrr6 karma

What in porn are we learning that are wrong, do only boys get it wrong or the youngster in general?

realkaseygrant12 karma

What women are like or enjoy, what constitutes good sex, techniques to use, things to try, etc. What men should look like or be able to do.

VG886 karma

Thank you so much for answering. You might not revisit this thread, but part of your answer threw me for an unexpected loop.

Sex in my personal life is not even the same activity. I need sex at home at least once a day, hopefully more than that, and it doesn't matter if I have worked or not. It's not even comparable.

I don't fully comprehend this, surely because I'm ignorant of how it is in these different types of sexual situations.

Are you saying it's emotionally different? Or that sex work is more of a performance, worrying about the scene and angles, so you're not really being physically intimate even though orgasms are involved?

Do these differences make a difference in how you view sex in terms of performance versus personal intimacy? Do people who see sex as too intimate to do with strangers in front of a camera perhaps conflate performative sex with intimate sex? Does it not seem like the same thing?

Or am I way off-base in these assumptions?

Again, thank you so much. I really hope you're able to come back to this one because I feel this might lead to a much better understanding of how it is that some people are fine doing sex work while most seem to think it's so far over the line of what they'd ever be willing to do.

flumberbuss6 karma

Not OP, but imagine sex is like a conversation. You talk a lot at work and that uses a certain part of your brain and you are performing in your professional work persona. You may be exhausted from work, but still want to get home and have nice conversation with friends and family. The analogy is by no means perfect, but sex as job performance and sex as loving activity are two different things.

realkaseygrant6 karma

I think this analogy is pretty spot-on. Sex at work has a performative aspect, on camera and off, that tends to diminish the pleasurable aspects for me. It's also not FOR me. It's for the client. My desires or needs aren't even on the table, for the most part.

abdreaming-3 karma

Wait you think women in porn take advantage of men?

realkaseygrant19 karma

"MOST of these settings"

jimfo33 karma

is squirting real or just pee?

realkaseygrant33 karma

Although I don't know that this is my particular wheelhouse, it is definitely urine and secretions from the Skene's glands. If your bladder is full when you begin having sex, the secretions will come out with the urine. If it is empty, it can be a small percentage urine to other fluids.

AtHomeWithJulian33 karma

Are your interactions purely sexual? Or is there an emotional labor component to the work?

realkaseygrant180 karma

Absolutely not purely sexual. I would say that is a very rare occurrence. I feel more like a nude therapist than a sex worker most of the time. Some of it can be very emotionally demanding, but also very rewarding. People are lonely, and they need affection and to be touched. It's a public service, if you ask me.

Mnemnosine9 karma

Seconding what you said here about being a nude therapist. When my wife died six years ago, I couldn’t find a therapist or counselor at all—the waiting lists were six months long. So instead I found a stripper who’d been through a bunch of shit of her own plus therapy. She knew how to create a safe, non-judgemental space and she wasn’t afraid of grief or discussing death and loss. I saw her for four months, and that was the grief counseling I actually needed. Took care of the widow’s fire too—wouldn’t have made it through without her.

realkaseygrant8 karma

Thank you for the validation, and although I personally never did anything like what I do now as a dancer, I'm glad that you were able to find the comfort that you needed during that time.

gaqua32 karma

How do porn stars get paid? Like, is it cash after the shoot? Do they get paid through an invoicing system? Is there a monthly salary for studio contract girls? I know different girls have different rates for different acts on their “menu” so to speak, but how does the boring “job” part work?

Do you just get up and go to work and do the sex stuff, then go shower and go home or whatever and every other Friday there’s a direct deposit?

realkaseygrant39 karma

Most porn performers get paid by the shoot. It can be any way... literally cash in an envelope or tax-deducted payroll. Contract girls get a combination of salary and gig- based. Everybody sets their own rates for the most part. I'm not sure what you mean by the "boring 'job' part. " Sorry.

It is definitely not that way with the money, but it is for the showering lol.

gaqua20 karma

Thanks for answering. I had a roommate years ago whose girlfriend was a “porn star” but she’d only done some very questionable non-studio things that didn’t require testing or even ID. When she went to get paid they told her it’d be direct deposited and then she never heard from them or got paid again. Her videos are STILL up on some sites now, like 16-17 years later. I think she owns a hair and nail salon in Vegas now.

If you want to answer another: what’s the best part of the job? Not sex related, more about the industry or culture.

realkaseygrant38 karma

That's shady and disgusting. NO actual studio would film you without valid test results. 🤢

Sorry, forgot the last part. I'm a hardcore introvert, so a lot of the "culture" stuff is lost on me. Porn is like a very large, very dysfunctional family of sorts. Where having relationships with civilians has consequences.

Sarabethq29 karma

I see you mentioned kids, how did the conversation come up or they find out? We’re you honest with them from the get go when you felt they were old enough to understand?

realkaseygrant320 karma

I never wanted them to find out from somebody else, so when my oldest was 12, I explained it as best I could in an age- appropriate way. I did get "outed" in my community at the time about a year and a half later by the son of a family I was helping financially. That kind of burned, but oh, well. It was inevitable. It was hardest for my oldest, although he invited me to speak to his gender studies class by the time he was a junior, and I got invited back the next year, so he did a pretty good job turning it around on everybody. My middle son said once that somebody said they saw me getting f*cked or something, and he said, "My mom got paid. Why did your mom do it?" They are good kids.

DIWhy-not68 karma

When he’s old enough, I want to buy that middle son a beer for that Michelin rated roast.

realkaseygrant4 karma

He just turned 21 in June.

frustrateddormer3 karma

Genuinely curious, how were you able to explain it in an age-appropriate way?

realkaseygrant7 karma

Basically, that I made movies for adults that had sex (or nudity) in them, and that people that they know would likely find out.

ThePope9824 karma

Do you think you could get a different job with such a long background in sex work? Would you ever even want a different job in the future?

realkaseygrant44 karma

I can't imagine anybody wants to pay me a rate I could live with lol. I have no idea what is next.

punchheribthetit34 karma

There’s always politics, but it’s a pretty shady gig.

trizzo030948 karma

Politics makes sense as she already fucks people for a living.

methpartysupplies67 karma

She shouldn’t demean herself by going into politics. There’s more dignity in her current work.

realkaseygrant40 karma

A-fucking-men to that.

LayneLowe20 karma

I am 70 and widowed, I'm pretty sure people like me could be a continuing market for you well into your 60s. I would care about emotional fit, affection and compassion more than sex with some young hottie.

realkaseygrant17 karma

Honestly, I do see some very nice older gentleman, but I see FAR more younger men. Younger than me by quite a lot.

Zombie_Lincoln20 karma

How do I contact escorts in a safe and easy way?

realkaseygrant50 karma

However they say in the ad. READ THE AD. For the love of God, nobody seems to. The site linked as proof first is a good place to start.

alwaysleftout31 karma

Your ad says 30s for age, but your description here says you are 45. Might be time to update it.

realkaseygrant-5 karma

Thanks for watching out for me. Super appreciated. A cursory Google search of my name brings up my birthday, so I was really getting one over on people with this.

jdsundevils2 karma

Thank you for doing the AMA. Are there any red flags someone should be looking for to avoid getting scammed?

realkaseygrant1 karma

Review sites are the best way to verify the veracity and looks/performance of any provider. Those have some caveats, as an individual review or detail may be false, but the big picture should be close enough.

Nuhaykeed20 karma

How do you feel about the dynamic change in the sex work industry since 2020? With the surge of things like OnlyFans, etc, have you seen a drastic change in income?

realkaseygrant78 karma

No, it hasn't changed for me, but I don't have an OF. (I promised my kids I wouldn't release any new material until they were all out of high school years ago. My youngest just graduated this year. )

Evilspatula66620 karma

Pro Sex worker here! Good for you!

Question- have you ever been hired to provide time for another woman?

realkaseygrant18 karma

I have been contacted multiple times but never had an actual appt happen. Lots of couples, though.

Sudden-Effect-431116 karma

Hi there! If that’s really you - could you please confirm your identity and make a post in your twitter @kaseygrant ? All the best to you !

mymuse66614 karma

How do you protect yourself and your clients from std's?

realkaseygrant40 karma

Condoms. Lots of them. Also, visual inspection. But mostly condoms, dental dams, etc.

VG8810 karma

How does this work in porn where condoms are so infrequently used?

realkaseygrant39 karma

Porn relies on testing (every 28 days when I was filming). It is absolutely required, independently verifiable, and there are quarantine processes if anybody tests positive for HIV or something serious. Many companies did start using condoms after the CA OSHA craziness of 2011, as well. Most just moved to NV, though.

BenderIsGreatBendr3 karma

What about herpes and stuff?

Like I know Jessie Rogers quit about a decade ago because she caught herpes on set.

She’s back in the industry the past few years and doing bareback scenes with mainstream companies, how does that work?

realkaseygrant6 karma

Well, my understanding with that is that it is highly unlikely to be transmitted during times of no outbreaks, so visual inspection is more important than testing. Also, with up to 85% of the population being seropositive for HSV-1, it seems kind of pointless. 🤷🏼‍♀️

sigma_Omega4413 karma

What is the worst part of the job you've run into? Would it be the traveling or the setup?

realkaseygrant27 karma

Mostly the judgemental assholes, but I have grown a very thick skin. I love traveling. I spend 95% of my time working my home area with my regular clients, though. The ads and all that rigermarole can suck.

Melodic_Oil_248613 karma

How do you know if you're "top tier"?

realkaseygrant28 karma

By looking at your rates in comparison to the market. I actually charge what I say, and that's the pinnacle of my market for the most part.

ETA: Also reviews. There are 2 big review sites.

Otherwise_Comfort_9512 karma

I saw you mentioned having kids. Not sure if you’re married. How accepting is your family of your career?

realkaseygrant47 karma

I am divorced. My ex was not accepting, despite meeting me at work. I now have a very close male friend of 7 years who doesn't love it, but understands it and the reasons why I do it, and my kids feel the same way. All pretty awesome, IMO.

Helpme_19928 karma


realkaseygrant27 karma

Don't compare yourself to her clients. Realize that work isn't home, and she can still love and want you.

MrRockPaper11 karma

I have a friend to whom I was attracted before she got into escort work. We even discussed her getting into that line of work before she started. Some escorts had met her at a Super Bowl party and told her they thought she'd enjoy it and be good at it. Apparently they were right because it's been several years now.

How do I discuss my interest in her? I'd be happy to be a friend-and-client but I don't even know if escorts have that as a thing. I am nonmonogamous myself and I have no problem with her being an escort and just being FWB or just a client.

However if it came down to "Look, would you rather sleep with her once OR remain friends with her indefinitely" I'd choose the latter. It's just a confusing situation. How do I even talk to her about it? Or maybe I don't?

realkaseygrant17 karma

I agree about the conversation, but I will say this. If you knew her before or outside of work, stay outside of it. I don't really allow movement between the two realms, as one is all of me and the other isn't. I have developed 1 friendship with a former client, and I had a 5 year-long exclusive arrangement with another client. That was very difficult. If I met you as a client, you are a client. If outside of work, it would be weird to start treating them like a client. HTH.

MrFYU9 karma

What are the clients you meet up with like? Are they normal people, how do they treat you? Have you had any experiences with clients that were painful to go through?

realkaseygrant29 karma

I see all kinds of people. ALL kinds. Young, old, rich, poor, white, black, fat, fit, smart, stupid... they all treat me with respect or we never even end up in the same room together. I turn down more people than I see. I mentioned 2 earlier, and that's really about it.

gtpat129 karma

How hard is it to date someone outside of the industry? Any dating horror stories?

realkaseygrant16 karma

I have only had one relationship with an industry person, and it wasn't any kind of exclusive (like I am recreationally exclusive now), and I never really "dated" per se. I have met all of my long-term relationships in the wild and got to know them other ways. I don't think I would like dating much, although I kind of do get paid to go on dates. Hmmm...

only1lcon8 karma

Do you feel the stigma about being a sex worker is getting better or worse?

realkaseygrant21 karma

Better overall, but people are much more likely to be rude nowadays, and lack basic respect for other human beings with whom they disagree, so it's a mixed bag.

Schadenfreude10918 karma

What is the best and the worst experience with clients you ever had?

realkaseygrant14 karma

I can't pick a best. I have had overwhelmingly positive experiences almost invariably. I have 2 bad ones, one was just 2 weeks ago, that basically resulted in a wasted trip and being groped and threatened with rape in one and not paid for services rendered in another. The former was recent. I am not that naive anymore, regarding the latter. I have had my time wasted 1000x, but that's not that awful.

Schadenfreude10917 karma

Sorry you had to go through that. What do you do when you don't get paid for the services you provided?

realkaseygrant22 karma

Cry about it. You have no recourse in the US.

greenslam2 karma

Do you ask for a down payment at first? Like 50% down and then remainder upon completion of the task.

realkaseygrant7 karma

I take a 20% deposit at booking, then the remainder in cash at the appt.

sonygoup7 karma

As an Escort, what's some ways I can make you comfortable and create a great experience for the both of us?

realkaseygrant2 karma

Just be authentic and engaging. Don't be rushed or anxious. Brush up on conversational topics or events. Give noobs some time to get comfortable. Conversation is really important.

Always3115 karma

What’s the biggest misconception about your work that you wish people would stop believing?

realkaseygrant21 karma

That you pay for sexual activities. You do not. I sell my time. What happens in that time is up to me. Also, that I'm a drug-addicted thief with an IQ of 85.

_TripleN9_5 karma

What’s your retirement plan?

realkaseygrant18 karma

I plan to have a plan soon. I'm bad at that.

Ok_Human_13755 karma

How would a woman go about seeking a female sex worker for herself?

realkaseygrant2 karma

You can search Tryst or Eros or Slixa for providers who have stated that they accept women or couples in their ads. Good luck!

LyridiaStarwalker4 karma

Do you have any advice for someone looking to get into the industry?

realkaseygrant6 karma


Ok...I'll finish this for real after work.

jenniuinely3 karma

Explain this response but saying that you love your work..?

Chloee_Mae13 karma

I’m not OP but I’m also a SW. I’m not sure her exact reasonings but it’s like passing through a portal that’s very difficult to get back through.

The work itself is incredibly satisfying and liberating. I’m free to work when and how I see fit. I answer to no one but myself. I’m also lucky because my husband and I started this together and we’re both 100% committed to it.

However the whole thing is a double edged sword. I’ve never escorted but making porn puts me at an elevated STI risk eve with vigorous testing and condom use. I’ve been assaulted by coworkers and fans because they seem to think the nature of my work changes the definition of consent.

On top of that SW is a charged subject and people have very strong opinions and feelings. Personally I’ve lost friends and family over it. Socially I’m now at permanent disadvantage in the regular world. Im at constant risk of changing laws and regulations. My bank accounts can be frozen and all my money taken. All of the chaos with Reddit and Twitter are putting me at risk of being deplatformed no matter how strictly I follow the TOS.

Finally, the longer I do this the more difficult it will be for me to find a regular job without a very open minded hiring manager or creating one myself. Also the better I do financially, the more difficult it is to justify leaving to find another job. I’m just not going to find something that matches it with my current resume. It is a trap.

Even if I had only done a handful of videos, those videos would be like a guillotine constantly floating above me waiting to drop. No matter how much I tried to hide them there’s always the risk someone would find them and use them to make my life hell.

So in the end, making the decision to become a sex worker is not something anyone should do lightly. You have to be willing to commit completely and accept all the consequences. For most people it’s not worth it.

realkaseygrant5 karma

Wow. Thanks for answering this for me. I don't try to hide anything anymore, but this is basically exactly what I would say.

Light_Dark_Choose4 karma

What cosmetic procedures have you undergone? How much have you spent?

realkaseygrant7 karma

Only boobs. @5k 15 years ago

Gantara3 karma

Ok but what was the weirdest kink you've had to deal with for a client?

realkaseygrant3 karma

Stepping on his balls with 7" stripper heels on. I cried "uncle" before he did.

klowder423 karma

How often do you enjoy having sex with your clients?

realkaseygrant0 karma

Define "enjoy."

Intelligent_Rope_9123 karma

What are some reasons you have that you think would make younger women perceive you as a positive role model and influence?

realkaseygrant7 karma

I am my own boss. I decide who to see and when. I travel often and subsidize it with work. I make decent money. I am comfortable with my sexuality. I get paid to go out to extravagant dinners, or sleep even, and have been given 3 pairs of Louboutins in 2 years. What's not to like?

robfrisina3 karma

Travel? What cities do you love to visit and why?

realkaseygrant13 karma

I've lived all over and traveled a ton. (300k+ air miles) I love Whistler, BC, Canada. I lived outside of Osaka for 3 years and loved that. I have Iceland and Glacier National Park and Alaska on the short list now.

dman451032 karma

Going to Osaka at the beginning of august if you have any must do recommendations

realkaseygrant10 karma

Ferris wheel at Hep 5, next to Hankyu Osaka Train Station; Okonomiyaki!!!, anywhere in Kansai; Kyoto is very close to Osaka; Osaka Castle, but if you can travel, Himeji-jo is better and close

hunter18993 karma

Are you not afraid of getting busted by cops?

realkaseygrant21 karma

There is nothing illegal about selling your time.

prfrnir2 karma

Thanks for your initial response! More questions I thought of:

What were your best experiences (that you are willing to share)? Could be sexual or just general! What was going through your mind the first time you did a porn shoot? Webcam stream? Strip? Escort service?

Also, if you were to have an escort, what would be your dream evening?

realkaseygrant2 karma

I have had more amazing meals than I can count. I was going to drive a client's Ferrari, but he had a heart attack that night. It was suboptimal timing lol. Yes, I was there, and yes, I took him to the hospital. Just not in the Ferrari. My first porn shoot had that surreal quality about it like other things you never imagined yourself doing. Cam stuff just seemed kind of normal for me at the time. Stripping was crazy the first time. I was so young, and the heels were so high. My legs were shaking so badly that money was falling out of my garter. Eesh. And escorting was like the porn, but slightly more fear because of the legal issues, which I didn't understand well at the time. I was with an agency briefly in the beginning.

I have hired an escort once to be the third in a threesome. She wasn't the girl I wanted, but she was cute enough. Just didn't seem into it. My dream evenings involve no escorts or escorting at this point in my life. Definitely involves sex, though. Probably lots. 😁

Tinonono2 karma

Is it easy to get herpes or HPV infection in this industry?

realkaseygrant6 karma

It's easy, as in almost impossible not to, to get one of those in one way or another on this planet...

bubba1602 karma

You have a bodyguard? What’s he make? I made 20% when I did that 30 years ago

realkaseygrant21 karma

No. I'm a fucking badass. 😛

tossthisinthebucket2 karma

Thank you for doing this… and very informative.

What would you say your wildest experience has been?

Are most/many of the girls/women that do porn also escorts from your experiences?

realkaseygrant3 karma

I'm coming back for this. Promise.

realkaseygrant3 karma

Gosh...wildest experience? There has been so much. Probably getting airtighted (1 in every hole) in the living room of somebody's house at a birthday party (adults only), and realizing I didn't know how I'd gotten there.

Many. I don't know if most is accurate. Escorting in porn is SHARPLY divisive.

happyhikercoffeefix2 karma

There are a LOT of holes in our body ...like which ones are we talking about?

realkaseygrant1 karma

Not ears or nostrils or my urethra...😄

dman451032 karma

Do escorts actually have pimps? Does it depend on what tier of escort you are?

realkaseygrant6 karma

I have never even seen a pimp in my life, but I do occasionally get a text proposition from one lol. There is something to being in the upper eschelon, but it's more about not being a prostitute. Now, I worked at the Bunny Ranch, and Dennis Hof was close enough to a pimp. I didn't stay there long.

dman451032 karma

Very interesting, thanks for the response.

I bet you have some great stories about the Bunny Ranch

realkaseygrant1 karma

Not really. Some drama with Dennis and Brooke. I only stayed for 2 weeks.

ShinUkisada2 karma

Were there people in your life that disapproved of your work and how did you overcome that/when did you stop caring about their disapproval?

realkaseygrant2 karma

My father. I cut him out of my life for 6 years over the way he treated me talking about it. He is nicer to me now.

B3de2 karma

What are your rules for your clients? Do you have something they have to read and agree to?

realkaseygrant2 karma

I'm not a fan of the modern era's idea that you need a 5-page waiver of all the ways you can touch someone. I tell them not to stick anything in my butt and not to punch me in the face. Also, they need to have demonstrated respect in all of our interactions leading up to meeting, and if they do anything that bothers me, they need to respect that boundary. Full stop.

Always3112 karma

Do your clients request you to wear anything sometimes?

realkaseygrant1 karma


shdrr2 karma

About escort service. How often do you see people get into the industry, an at what age? How often does one do it because of their situation, but not their choice? Can people get away or do they want to get away from the industry?

The perception is people do it because they have to, and it is really hard to move on once you get in. I do hope this is not the case. This is very informative, thanks you alot.

realkaseygrant2 karma

As an independent provider, I rarely encounter other escorts and don't know much about them beyond their ads. They appear to mostly start in their 20s, and I hope they are not doing this out of desperation. Anything you do out of desperation is likely to be damaging. You lose freedom of choice to necessity, and that feels bad no matter what. It is very difficult to get out permanently for reasons already discussed, but mostly easy(ish) money.

Hot-Reflection37352 karma

Are you ever disgusted by the shape of ur clients? Do you have to act like you want them anyway

realkaseygrant1 karma

Disgusted is a strong word, but some people are more physically appealing than others. You have to find something attractive about them and focus on it.

Mxswat2 karma

How do you feel about findomming? Do you think that this falls in the situations where women are taking advantage of men? I personally experienced living with a person who does findomming and the shit she pulled on others mans really made me question if this fetish is ethical.

Also, I liked what you wrote about the porn industry attracting damaged people, I feel like it's the same for the kink scene and I really started noticing it since I started therapy this year. (And I'm a kinkster too)

realkaseygrant2 karma

Findomming is some weirdness that I don't fully understand. Not my bag.

Mowensworld2 karma

Do you ever have clients that are so physically unappealing you can't get over it to do the work you are paid for? Like 'thousands of dollars or not, I'm not touching that...'

realkaseygrant1 karma

Not if they are clean.

Enziabestestdoggo2 karma

Thanks for doing the AMA. I imagine porn producers are people who prey on first time actresses/ actors.

Is there any regulatory body that helps with oversight? Do you have to hold a license/ certification? Or is it a bunch of shady people renting out an AirBNB for a weekend?

Have you walked away from any shoots due to red flags?

realkaseygrant7 karma

There are those, but not the vast majority. It really isn't what people think. Incidentally, I very briefly wrote a column for Adult Industry News on protecting yourself as a performer in the industry. There is no regulatory anything, but it isn't just shady people renting houses. There are no licenses, but lots of record- keeping requirements. I have never left a shoot, but I have been lied to to coerce an agreement to take the job. I needed the money a lot more then. Porn doesn't pay as well as escorting for most people.

AsOneLives2 karma

Do you think there's a market for more realistic depictions of sex? Ethical porn? Less polish, more passion. Showing people basically the whole process of a couple getting into it? Or people hooking up. Something like amateur+.

realkaseygrant1 karma

I am working on a project like this with a kind of educational leaning or option. It's in development, so I'm not really ready to discuss it openly. But yes. Some similar things already exist.

Comfortable-Mouse4091 karma

Why does all porn suck? Why can't anyone write something realistic?

realkaseygrant7 karma

Because nothing that's happening is realistic? Because getting fucked and delivering dialogue are VERY different skills?

Super_Masterpiece9621 karma

What do you do if you have a date and your stomach is messed up? Do you use the hotel bathroom and then tell your client "don't go on there for 35 or 45 minutes!"?

realkaseygrant1 karma

This has never happened to me.

lenochku0 karma

How do you deal with the misogyny that you experience just because you're a sex worker? Have you ever had a man doxx you?

realkaseygrant2 karma

There is a large swath of the population that sees me a sub-human, and I could generally give zero fucks. These same people were probably trying to hire me yesterday, and their behavior says more about them than it does about me. I just try to comport myself above reproach always, and to be a good and generous person so that I don't add more fuel to the fire. Maybe somebody changes their mind because I'm a decent human being.

I was doxxed in this porn wikileaks nonsense in 2010. It sucked at the time.

Johnny_B_Asshole-1 karma

Pancakes or waffles? And how much to have you stay long enough for me to make them for breakfast?

realkaseygrant2 karma

Waffles. With LOTS of whipped cream. And if it is an overnight appt, 3500.

DominantBubby445-4 karma

Were your associates and bosses drug kingpins?

realkaseygrant4 karma

Uhhhh...NO. Never. I had a client who was a kinda big deal in that field, though.

ETA: what bosses?

Death-Chan98-6 karma

Why instead of hiding behind fancy words as in the title, call yourself straighforward a prostitute with a broken home?

realkaseygrant1 karma

You clearly lack understanding of a crucial difference: I do not sell sex. I do not sell activities. I sell time and companionship. Now, I have been a licensed prostitute in 2 Nevada counties, but that is a different thing entirely. I don't see a single fancy word in the title. And I am pretty fucking far from hiding.

ETA: What broken home are you talking about, and how can you walk around in this day and age spouting that kind of nonsense without being violently attacked? You mean a heteronormative nuclear family with 1.8 kids, a workaholic father with rage issues, and a mother who only abuses wine and Xanax? Meh.

Sea-Floor697-12 karma

What is the attraction I mean aren't there easier ways to make money?

VG8819 karma

You don't think sex is easy, for $350k?

AggressivePhoto761-25 karma

To each their own, I’d prefer to clean bathrooms than sell my body. Everyone has different morals

realkaseygrant41 karma

Everybody sells some part of themselves. Your strength, your intelligence, your time and talents...I understand that people feel this way, but find it pretty irrational.

dystopiaincognito-15 karma

Why did you start stripping at 17? Why didn’t you wait till 21 years old? Didn’t you finish high school?

realkaseygrant3 karma

I did finish high school, and went to college for 2.5 years. I have a 4.0 GPA in the Honors Program from a private university. I withdrew when I got divorced. I was later accepted to UPenn to the Neuropsych program (pretty much the best in the country), but never enrolled. Thanks for the concern.

I managed to start dancing underage because I knew somebody who thought I was older.

soffo_moric-17 karma

Your web page says $600 for an hour, I usually finish in about 30 seconds. How much?

realkaseygrant9 karma

I wouldn't even speak to you.

AdamSmithANCAP-21 karma

what the hell are these proofs? they dont prove anything, lol. You should get better in your trolling.

realkaseygrant5 karma


HermanCainAward-21 karma

Who classifies you as a ‘top tier’ anything? I’ve been around and I just don’t see that rating when viewing your, uh, profile.

realkaseygrant4 karma

I answered a similar question already. It is the case that I am one of the highest paid and highest rated in my region, so sorry that it offends you. Maybe you should examine that in your introspection time. Facts are facts.

HermanCainAward-8 karma

Lol. It doesn’t offend. It’s just such a silly self proclamation.

Luckily all the white knights who can’t afford ridiculous self promotion have spoken on your behalf.

realkaseygrant5 karma

Sorry that you found it silly, but I thought it was relevant that I work often and am good at it. You could call yourself an escort but never work, hang out on street corners, or just suck at it, and the questions would be answered very differently. Have a lovely day.