As requested: IAmA (former) prison guard who worked on death row. AMAA

Saddest thing you've ever witnessed?

I heard a rape I couldn't do anything about. This was when I was working in the larger cell house with around 260 inamates. I heard the screaming coming from one of the cells but couldn't find it in time. When I finally did I knew something had happened but the inmate wouldn't talk.

Were you armed? And were others with you?

Terrifying to make it to the cell only to become seconds :/

We were not given anything at all to protect ourselves. Still today they don't have any weapons, not even OC spray. The idea of that is that the inmates could (and very easily because of being outnumbered) get it and use it as an offense.

I know 18 year olds that are scared to take pre-made dinners over to the county jail with the entire god damn church group, and armed guards all around. And these inmates are in there for stealing cows and missing child support payments and other silly shit. You've got balls of steel, sir.

I thought I had balls of steel too, until the first time that big door locked behind me. Took me a long time to find my balls again. I'll never forget that first time.

Did you guys have much hand to hand combat training?

Very little. COs are very under trained, under staffed, and no weapons. I still have great respect for correctional officers.

My uncle has been on a prison staff for quite some time. I'm not sure how much you got paid, but around here they make damn good money. He has tried to get me to apply for the CO job many times, but I know what that position holds. I'll always have respect for them, especially the one like you, who were very young going in. Would you say that after your first day or so that you thought, "I'm in over my head."?

Yes. The first time that door closes behind you is a feeling I'll never forget. I was so close to turning around and saying "OK, let me out now".

What was the worst crime that someone was executed for while you were working there?

While we weren't given any information on the inmates, sometimes certain inmates would stick out in my mind that I'd go home and find the information. The worst I found was one guy that killed a child, skinning it while it was still alive. I tried not talking to him anymore.

Did most of them turn to religion towards the end?

Yes, nearly every one of them in there held on to religion. I think it was a great coping mechanism for them. It gave them a chance at peace for what they had done I guess.

What were some of the more unique or interesting last meal requests that you know about?

The prison actually had a set cost. I believe it was $60. Speaking to veteran guards there the request was usually fast food followed by ice cream. They say you don't realize how much you miss ice cream until you absolutely can't get it anymore.

As of 2011, Texas death row inmates can no longer request last meals after an inmate ordered a large extravagant feast then declined to eat any of it. The meal?

Two chicken-fried steaks with gravy and sliced onions; a triple-patty bacon cheeseburger; a cheese omelet with ground beef, tomatoes, onions, bell peppers and jalapeños; a bowl of fried okra with ketchup; one pound of barbecued meat with half a loaf of white bread; three fajitas; a meat-lover’s pizza; one pint of Blue Bell Ice Cream; a slab of peanut-butter fudge with crushed peanuts; and three root beers. 

Damn, poor Texans. Our prison had a price limit, I want to say it was around $60. Plus, none of it could be imported, it all had to be found locally.

Anything paranormal happen during your time?

Absolutely. I've seen "inmates" outside of their cell. Heard officer keys at night when there was no one but me. Had a friend working a tower that saw the old school inmates with the black and white stripped uniforms and old school prison guard as they were cleaning up the side of the road next to the tower. Didn't believe in paranormal stuff prior to working there, but afterwards I'm convinced there is something there.

Elaborate on your experiences seeing "inmates" outside of their cell?

Saw figures standing at the end of ranges and when I got to where they were there would be nothing there. It was impossible for an actual inmate to get out, and if he was out and standing there, it would have been impossible to get back in. Sometimes other inmates would call me down because they had someone standing in front of their cell. Once one asked me why I came back to his cell after a short period. I hadn't been there in over an hour. He says an officer was just standing in front of his cell 5 minutes prior.

Just got chills writing that and remembering the fear on his face.

I'm sitting in my backyard having a cigarette in the dark because I don't want to wake my neighbors. Half way through reading this I heard a raccoon jump on my fence. Completely shit myself. Just thought you should know.

Not long after writing that, my dog knocked over a floor fan. Just thought you should know I screamed like a little girl.

What was your reaction to seeing an inmate outside of their cell?

Have a mini heart attack, try not to piss myself.

was there ever anyone who was allergic to peanuts or shellfish and ordered it for their last meal to try and commit suicide from it

The doctors are well aware of their allergens and had to approve their last meal before it was delivered. They gotta be smarter than that.

Do any of them try to fight their way out of it, or are they just content with it?

We did have an attempted escape. They tried to tunnel out the back where the pipes and stuff run. They made it to the final exterior door before they were caught.

Death row inmates though were usually the best behaved inmates in the prison. They were the most secured too though so it's not likely they would have been able to attempt anything should they have tried.

What if they had outside help.. say a brother who happened to be an architect of the prison.

Was an avid viewer of that show. One of the few I've watched all the way through!

You should try breaking bad. I thought prison break was the best until I had seen breaking bad.

Watching Breaking Bad and Sons of Anarchy now. My two favorite shows.

You are now my favorite prison guard! I don't know anyone else...

Thanks! I'm so glad I'm your favorite guard you know!

When an inmate is given their injection, what people are watching? Just the guards? Are the inmate's family allowed to watch?

Inmate's family (usually doesn't show), the victim's family, one local media from the county the crime happened in(must be in attendance to witness and confirm), and the local sheriff of the county the crime happened in is invited.

Does the victim's family usually show from your experience?

Yes, there is usually at least one victim family there. Guess they see it as some type of closure.

What do they do after? I mean, like... go get hammered or something? I can't imagine it's like a wake at a funeral or anything like that. What's the norm? Just leave and try to put it out of their mind? It's as much a torture for the observers, especially if it's family. Are they counselled or anything?

I really don't know. I do believe the state offers counseling, but outside of that I don't know how they mentally handle that.

What are your opinions of the death penalty?

I have mixed emotions about it. Part of me supports it, as those that are on death row deserve their punishment. The other part has that worry that they have the chance of being innocent. Ultimately, I'd rather every man be allowed to live then one innocent man being put to death.

was there anyone on death row that you thought was truly innocent?

We aren't given any information on the inmates we are watching. We have to do our own investigating through media to figure out what they are in there for. With minimum contact with the inmates and no other information to go off of, you don't really think about it. They didn't talk about the reason they were there.

Don't think about them, or try not to think about them?

I just treated everyone the same. Made it easier to deal with people if I didn't know what they were in there for.

I got a few questions:

What was it like going to work everyday?

Did you ever get attached to an inmate?

What was your favorite/least favorite part about your job?

Thanks for the AMA!

What was it like going to work everyday?

It was very interesting. Dealing with people in that type of setting is an experience I'll never forget. We were also outnumbered 300 to 1 so that lack of complete control was offsetting at times.

Did you ever get attached to an inmate?

There was a young guy, around 18, that I felt bad for. He was placed into protective custody because he just couldn't handle the prison setting. He was your average dude that got caught up in some bad shit. I can't remember now what he was in prison for, but I remember that I just had some pitty on him.

What was your favorite/least favorite part about your job?

I like talking to people. Talking to prisoners and learning about their life was fascinating to me. Most of them just wanted someone to talk to listen to them anyway. Least favorite was being stuck back there with them. When those gates closed behind you it was a horrible feeling because you knew if shit went down, you wasn't getting out.

Are you the subject of a lot of hate from the inmates because you are seen as who is sentencing them because you are authority? And were you ever attacked by an inmate?

The only hate we got from inmates were those trying to establish a reputation. None of them held us personally accountable for the reason they were there. They knew we weren't cops and we had nothing to do with their sentence. The only time we were tried up was as an attempt to gain some type of fear or control over the cellblock. That never worked though.

I was almost shanked (stabbed) by a former cop in protective custody. I let my guard down because he was a former cop, thinking he wouldn't try to hurt me. He almost stabbed me through the meal slot. I was able to catch his arm and ended up breaking his elbow. Learned a lesson that day.

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He was just having a bad day. I don't know what made him want to do it. He was in there for child molestation, guess he thought things couldn't get any worse.

Gassing happens. I was gassed and one of the reasons I decided to leave. Not a pleasant experience. Mine was in the form of a "water balloon" though.

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Jesus, that's horrible. I'm glad I got out when I did.

Please elaborate on this "gassing"

Threw a bag of piss at me from a second story cell. It busted at my feet, getting all over my uniform. Thankfully he missed his target. That being the top of my head.

What type of punishment did he get for doing that?

Wasn't much more we could do to him. I was working the segregation unit then, so he was already locked down. He was placed in a cell with a door instead of open bars, basically further isolation.

Inmate who has had the biggest impact on your life to this day? Whether or not it was a small or large change

The inmate I watched the night before he was put to death. Before leaving my shift of death watch we had to wake him up at 6am. When he awoke, as I was leaving, he told us to "have a good day". This, even though he was going to die that night. Was a powerful thing.

..how do you respond to something like that, "you too"?

Honestly, I almost did. Was able to catch myself. Said "thanks".

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Saw many inmates on the other side. They usually don't hold hate for COs, it's the police that lock them up they grudge over.

Hi. Thank you for doing this. Have you ever gotten to know any of the inmates before they were put to death? And dii you feel bad for any of them?

Never got to know any of them personally. We were allowed minimum contact with death row inmates. During the hourly checks we were separated from them by another cage whereas we walked down a sectioned off alleyway looking into the cells. I do remember one guy who had been on death row for 24 years. I was 18 at the time. It was fascinating talking to someone who had been in that cellblock longer than I've been alive.

So why are some inmates held for so long on death row, while some so little time? Is it priority?

By their own appeals process. Some slow it down, other accept their fate and don't fight it.

Hey. Do you also have to escort the inmate in his last moments? Prepare him for his sentence? How do the inmates act on such occassions? Are they allowed to talk to you and what do they talk about?

Executions are handled by a special unit of officers called the execution squad. They are with the inmates in the last 12 hours of their life. No other correctional officer gets to interact with the inmate.

What I was part of was "death watch" which is the night prior to their execution. He didn't talk much and kept to himself most of the night. They are allowed unlimited phone so he talked to his family for most of the time we were there.

how does one get to be part of the execution squad?

Know the right people. Back then, being young and stupid, I wanted to be a part of it. Now I'm thankful I never was. I'm sure that would have fucked with my psyche more than anything else.

are they all prison guards? they must have some doctor with them as well?

Yes they have doctors in the chamber with them, but the "execution squad" are specially trained corrections officers. Think a darker version of SWAT.

Tell me more!

Specially trained and was paid a special salary to kill a man. James freakin Bond.

James Bond usually works alone and doesn't kill people in chains.

Yeah, good point.

What made you want to get into a Corrections job at the tender age of 18?

Wanted to be in law enforcement, but couldn't until I was 21. Used this as an experience gainer.

that was pretty smart of you, why didn't you do some criminal justice at a college? A lot of big police departments require college hours or military.

I did criminal justice while in college, but then became a cop and realize I didn't need a criminal justice degree. Ended up studying computer forensics.

I can't be the only one who pictures the green mile when we talk about this. Are there many similarities (realising that the old one WAS set back quite a few years)

Also, were there any cruel guards?

There were guards that wanted to be cruel, but when you're outnumbered 300 to 1, you don't disrespect the power of the inmates. You're in their house, they are just allowing you to survive there.

There are a few similarities, the major one being the walk to the execution chamber (the green mile). That's still being done today here.

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Everyone in there had the "gang mentality". Respect in the prison is regarded to what we do as trust on the street. If I'm doing a business deal with you, I need you to trust that I'm good on what I say I will do for you. Respect is the same thing. If you don't gain any respect you're regarded as a coward, prey. It really is a dog eat dog world in a prison. You're either a leader or you're preyed upon.

When you watch movies about or set in prisons/death row, what parts make you complain out loud about inacuracies?

The freedom the character has. Prisons are incredibly controlling, unless you're in a minimum security prison. The stuff I see them get away with in shows makes me laugh.

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It's like that, but with the down time they are free to do what they want. It's a constructed freedom. They get to have freedom with the prison allows it.

Would you expand on what the "death watches" were?

Edit: Typed nine words and managed to misspell one of them.

They are placed in a cell alone located in the medical ward. Here they are watched by two guards at all times. They are allowed tv, unlimited phone, radio, cigarettes, and some food usually restricted. It's basically a way to segregate them before being put to death.

Unlimited phone? Did any one of them try to contact their victim's families?

If they had, the phone would have been taken away. They didn't want that to happen. Each call was screened before being sent out.

Do they have TV while on death row or for some of them if the the first time they have seen TV in years?

Yes, color TV. Death row lived very comfortably. It was the only thing keeping them sane.

Have you ever had a death row inmate commit suicide before his execution date?

The way execution is handled is that the governor signs the execution warrant. It is given to the warden. The warden decides when the execution will take place (usually days later). The death row inmate is immediately placed under "death watch" prior to his execution. Here they are by themselves and watched by two guards at all times. The day of the execution they are placed in a cell beside the execution chamber where they are watched by four "execution squad" members at all times. Basically, they aren't given a chance to kill themselves. At that moment, the state is determined to be the one to handle his death.

That sounds like a pretty quick process. Why, then, do inmates sit on death row for years? Are they all simply slogging through appeals, does it take the governor forever to get around to signing the execution warrant, or what?

Thanks for this AMA. Fantastically interesting.

Lawyers find new evidence, request a new trial. That alone can take 2-3 years. The appeals process slows it down even more after the trial. One thing about the death penalty, they give the person plenty of chances to prove their innocence, especially now. Back in the day it probably wasn't so good.

Are the actual injections done on site, or is it like Rockview, PA where they are shipped in to the death house shortly before. If it is on site do they still do the 'pound' in the rest of the prison that night? The only person I have met said they did back in '62 for the last PA execution by electric chair.

Thanks for doing this AMA.

They do executions there on site. There is a building where the executions are handled and the cell that they wait in is held. They walk to the building (where the term green mile came from). Veteran guards said back in the day during the electric chair times the power would flicker in the prison during the execution and the inmates would chant or something. There is a little noise now when they are walking to the "red door" that leads to the execution building but the prison is shut down do not many inmates get to see the process.

Do you feel desensitized to other real life situations as a result of working in death row or have any different outlooks on life from it?

The prison system didn't desensitize me. If anything, it made me enjoy my freedom more. After doing that, there's no way I'd intentionally do anything to end up in that situation.

Have you ever had any women on death watch? If so, did they act differently?

Women are housed in a different prison. I believe there is only one woman on death row here. Georgia has never put a woman to death.

was rape major in prison?

It wasn't major but it absolutely happened. It's not as near as bad as they portray it in the movies though.

Were any of them proud to be on death row? Or did they all seem apologetic for the crimes that got them in there?

Neither, they just seemed content. They didn't talk about why they were there. Nearly all of them were heavy in to religion though and focused mostly on talking about that. It was a surreal feeling.

What age were most of these death row inmates at?

Were they all charged with murder?

We was not given any information on the inmates, but I'm assuming they were all charged with murder. The median age was in their 40s. Some of those had been on death row for 10-20+ years.

In your post on the other thread, you mentioned an inmate that was pretty happy because his lawyer told him his execution was going to be stayed.

Was it? Or was he misinformed?

Yes he was granted a stay. Don't know if he was executed later or not, but he at least made it through that time.

Was there ever an inmate you genuinely thought might have been innocent?

Also what is the funniest thing an inmate from death row has done/said if anything?

By the way thanks for the AMA!

Didn't know enough about any of their cases to decide if I thought they were innocent. I treated them all as if they were guilty. It kept my emotions from getting involved.

Walking the death row at night and one of them started screaming that they saw an inmate outside his cell. Ghost. I was pretty sure that prison was haunted anyway. Freaked me out.

I am assuming you worked in medium and minimum security at a certain point, as well? If so, of the three, which was your favorite and least favorite to work, and why?

Also, how do you feel being on the opposite side of the same team now? Do you feel getting to know some of the inmates makes you better able to deal with the suspects you arrest now?

Correct, though the prison was a maximum security prison, we had trustee inmates that were a "minimum threat". We also had the "diagnostic threat" inmates. Since it was a classification prison, every inmate in the state came to this prison first before being assigned to a minimum, medium, maximum prison. So we really didn't know what kind of inmate we were dealing with in these cellhouses.

Actually, the protective custody inmates were my favorite to work with. They were the "soft" prisoners that couldn't make it in a real cell block so they were kinda the nicest. The least favorite was the diagnostic inmates. They were new to the system and trying to be "hard" all the time. Death row was the quietest block.

Yes working in the prisons made me a much better cop. I learned how to talk to people first, instead of using force. In the prison we were outnumbered 300 to 1. With those odds you think before trying to put your hands on someone. I've been a cop for almost 8 years now and have only had to use physical force three times. They were all drunk and talking wasn't going to do anything. The prison taught be how to talk my way of just about everything else.

Yes working in the prisons made me a much better cop. I learned how to talk to people first, instead of using force.

Would you support a law making a stint as a guard mandatory for all LEOs?

Absolutely.

Do you think that working as a prison guard has really helped you become a better law enforcement officer?

Yes. It taught be how to talk to people. It also taught me how the criminal mind works in a controlled setting before being shown it out on the streets in an uncontrolled environment. Since being outnumbered in a prison, you're not so quick to put your hands on people. It taught be how to be tactical without using force. I believe all cops need to work in a prison or jail setting before being put on the road.

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Cell phones were usually brought in by corrupt officers and happened a lot. I remember hearing one ring one night. Wasn't expecting that.

The weapons made were always incredible. They have so much time on their hands they can make seemingly innocent stuff into power weapons. Also, braided stuff. Some of those inmates had incredible artistic abilities. It was a shame seeing it wasted on prison art.

Did you have any particularly bad acts of violence between inmates? How prevalent were makeshift weapons?

They were everywhere. I was always amazed at the stuff inmates could make out of things you would think would be useless. Finding them was like a game to correctional officers. They were then a trophy if you ever found anything really big.

Have you ever had to deal with intense hostility from members of the public when they find out your previous employment?

Current employment yes, previous employment no. No one really resents prison guards, they are just kinda there.

Did it seem to you (I'm keeping in mind you were a CO and not a psychiatrist) that the people who were executed were all of sound mind, fully aware of what they had done and what they were facing?

Yes. The ones on death row never complained about being there. They were the nicest of inmates in the entire prison. Most had turned to religion and were accepting their punishment. Some of them were welcoming the execution because they knew they had done wrong.

If someone were to escape from prison, how would you recomend doing it.

Somehow get to a citizen hospital. Either through a bad injury or faked illness. Usually have 1-2 guards, easier to take out.

What's the strangest thing you've seen an inmate do? Judging by what you've been saying most of them seem pretty pacified, but did any of them 'snap' in ways you wouldn't have seen coming?

Thanks for the AMA btw, this is has been absolutely fascinating. One of the best AMAs I've read.

When I first started I was helping on the mental ward. I was on the second story and had an inmate demanding some pills. I refused, he threatened to jump off the rail. Being new and stupid I said do it...to a guy in the mental ward. He did. Broke his arm. I got in trouble. Think we both learned a lesson that day.

Which stories from inmates made the biggest impression on you? Any specific lessons learned from things that they told you?

Thanks for doing the AMA!

Man so many. Death row we didn't get to talk to much, but everyone else was so eager to tell you about their lives. At this point they are already found guilty so they will tell you anything you want to know. I learned so much about the drug trade. It was nice being there for them to release that burden from them too. It was like they felt better being able to talk about it to someone that was genially interested in listening to them.

Note: Learned about the drug trade, never got involved in it for obvious reasons...