IamA Queens Guard! AMA!

Have you met any of the Royals? Did you get to pat the Corgis?

We meet royals now and then, depends what and where you are doing business, however anytime we are in their presence, we wouldn’t be relaxed enough to start playing with their pets unfortunately.

I was hoping all your replies would be the text equivalent of stoic silence.

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Being vigilant and protecting the pups instead of playing with them. You are so strong.

It’s hard work😳

Do you ever get friendly enough with the royals that they know you by name?

I think it would be cool if the queen knew me by first name.

I think there is too many of us for that, it’s probably more common with the met police if they have the same people working with her all the time

Have you ever "broke" and laughed at something that someone did?

I once broke a small laugh and smile when what appeared to be a Gay American man started coming onto me and hyping me up. I’m a man.

You meant ‘onto,’ rather than ‘into,’ I certainly hope.

Yes!!😬

What's the most polite/appropriate way to get a photo with a member of the Queen's Guard that is on guard duty in one of the places open to the general public? I really like all things military history but I'm afraid of being one of those annoying tourists that try to mess with the guardsmen.

EDIT: I mean a guardsman that is standing in a non-cordoned off area. I might be a Redditor but even I'm not stupid enough to trespass when a man with a rifle and bayonet is watching me or to try and get tourist photos with guardsmen that are marching

Well I’ve always found I am more inclined to pose for a photo if someone asks, even though I can’t reply, I sometimes do a small nod to show I’m friendly, if someone’s being a nuisance I might March out the shot.

What are your thoughts on Nicolas Cage being able to access the Queen’s office so easily in National Treasure?

Maybe he’s secretly a Queen’s Guard

Its refreshing seeing a Queen's Guardsman able to joke around. Glad you decided to do this! It's been very interesting, learned quite a bit, and had mre than a few laughs! Thanks from Canada! :)

P.s. keep being the cool guardman you are! :)

Thank you! And I’ve always wanted to go to Canada 🇨🇦 I’ve worked with some and they were amazing.

Do the theatrics of the changing of the guards serve a specific purpose or is it more of a show nowadays?

The actual changing the guard ceremony is just a show really, however, it achieves the actual guard shift change between regiments or companies, and when we are on guard we are really security, despite what some people may think.

What consideration is given to the bearskin if you had to address a security incident? I would imagine it would get in the way, fall off or be hanging by your neck?

If there was an incident where there was shots being fired at be or bombers or so on, I’d not hesitate to lose the bearskin and charge into the threat.

Probably a very common question, but what do you do when you need to take a piss?

To be honest, normally we’re good at just going to the toilet just before we go in duty and we are okay for the duration of duty, if it’s really bad, and you piss yourself, then you piss yourself, but you might have to wear those trousers again in a few hours

How long is an average duty?

We stand outside for 2 hours at a time rotating. For 24hrs to a week.

rotating with how many dudes? are you just taking tiny naps throughout a day, must feel weird

We might take naps, might be redoing our guard kit, like our boots or belt, we might be eating, or we might be on a QRF (Quick Reaction Force) so there are always a group of soldiers (guards) ready in combat gear to fight any threat to the palace.

So in the event of a necessary quick reaction, do you immediately run to the armory to get live ammo and just keep the dress uniform on? I don't imagine there's time to change into something more tactical?

I’m the event of a quick reaction we always 24hrs a day with a team in combat gear waiting to go out. And if you’re on guard outside, you’d just fight with your red tunic on.

you’d just fight with your red tunic on.

Would another guard bring you live ammo, or do all guards already carry live rounds even when not on QRF?

All depends on the current threats we have, there’s always someone with live ammo.

Can't say for sure, but saw a documentary once that indicated, they just piss. Standing in place.

I don't know why you were downvoted. OP literally just confirmed it.

Yes if you go you go, nothing anyone can do, but you’ll probably get laughed at.

Can't wait for the bestof "Redditor potently describes pissing themselves while guarding the queen's life"

I know another guardsman who when he needed a piss, he got onto the radio and got someone to come out and cover his post while he went to the toilet.

I will keep answering until I answer you all, sorry if some are slow, I have a very busy work day.

You literally just stand around doing nothing! ;)

Doing nothing can be hard work sometimes ;)

Was it you on the video nocking that kid over?

It wasn’t me, I know who did it tho.

Do you often get annoying tourists trying to distract you like we see in movies?

It’ll happen every time you’re on guard

In a crisis situation would you keep your hairy hat to let's say shoot, run etc?

I’d ditch my hat.

What is your training like? Are there elements of armed or unarmed combat? Nonviolent deescalation? Etc.?

I’m your initial training, you’ll do armed combat training obviously, but also we do unarmed training when we do things called battle PT. Also A LOT of people do boxing and martial arts. Also when we do work with the police we get sole extra or different training.

Do you have any restrictions in your private life because of your job?

Might not be able to go home and see family, friends and partners much which is a big restriction, but overall I wouldn’t say there’s too many, just don’t get arrested, don’t release restricted info, and we should be okay.

What is some of the restricted info that you should not release?

It’d be a good way to make the news.

How do you keep that straight face?? Share your secret please

Well despite popular belief, we don’t undergo laughing training, we just are expected to get on with it and be professional and mature, also a big rumour, if you smile, you won’t just be fined hundreds of pounds and fired or whatever, you’ll get a few telling offs before any major action.

What would the punishment be if you had too many "telling offs"?

You can be charged money, punished with extra duties or work, and things like that.

Are there any perks or drawbacks to the job which you didn't expect going into it?

Perks can be that you see ‘cool’ things and go places, see people, and do things, the public can’t, and I guess drawbacks would be, you are based in London to do guards, if you live in Scotland for example, it’s costly getting home on a weekend or annual leave.

Thank you for your answers, have a great day!

No problem! You too!

What happens if you get sick while on guard duty? Beyond throwing up which I assume you would just do and then continue, what happens if you get sick to the point where it’s difficult to stand or pass out? Is there a way to call for assistance or an early guard change?

If I can’t continue my duty and it’s a safety risk or I’m genuinely going to die, I’ll just radio it in to the guardroom and get a replacement.

click this link to see an Image of me on guard.

Has the Queen ever played small pranks on guardsmen?

I feel like she’s a bit to old for pranks now, but I’m sure she’s been playful in the past.

How do you do fellow Guardsman?

hello there, what reg?

Coldstream Guards. And you?

scots guards!

What do you have nesting in those hats?

Every Guardsman is different, most never put anything up there, however when we go on guard, we live in the locations for 24hrs to a week, so if someone forgot to put a phone charger in their bag, they might put it in their bearskin.

Have you guys considered installing USB chargers in the hats so people can charge their phones while taking pictures with you?

Haha well if someone touched my hat they’d get a swift rifle and bayonet pointed at them and told to back off.

What would you do if you had an itch on your nose?

To be honest, it depends where I’m in guard. If it’s a post not seen my the public, I might have a little look around and itch my nose, if I’m at Buckingham palace, I’ll have to deal with it and it goes away eventually, although it’s very painful sometimes.

Apparently I'm completely ignorant about how any of this works because I am painfully American, but where else are Queen's Guards stationed? I guess I always assumed it was just a Buckingham Palace thing.

We are stationed at Wellington barracks, Next to the palace, we also stay inside the palaces or castles while on duty.

Are you friends with Queensguard61?

Best buddies

What do you actually do? And how did you end up in this line of work! (Did you always want to do it? What’s the selection process / what are the requirement like?)

Well for the first question, I am firstly a soldier. I am also a Scots Guardsman. I can do things such as go on operational tours, peacekeeping, MACA Ops, training, and Ceremonial and security roles to the royal residences and family. I always wanted to join the police or Armed forces, and I decided I wanted to be a ‘Queen’s Guard. You do training at Catterick ITC, if pass, the guards course, you join us, you’ll need to be fit, and immaculate in drill and uniform at all times, there are a lot of hard tests.

MACA being Military Aid to Civil Authorities. Things like hauling sandbags during flooding or relieving armed police at strategic locations to increase capacity.

Yes, or more recently, helping the NHS.

Do you mind people taking selfies with you?

I don’t mind if they’re nice about it

What happens to people who don't make way for the Queen's Guard?

They don’t stop. You move, or you get trampled.

We don’t divert our line of duty. Despite our own views, we follow rules and we shout warnings then we just move them.

Have you ever had to take action against a threat while on duty?

I haven’t really, luckily, I’ve shouted at a few people clinging fences but they aren’t any harm, no one’s got over on my duty.

Has anyone ever put a life-like mannequin in your stead just to see if anyone noticed?

We haven’t but good idea 👀

Does it get bad when you're working right under the sun in the height of summer? Have the other guards passed out in the middle of their duty? If so, how often does it happen?

It does get extremely hard when it’s hot, and people do pass out, if they tell someone before hand they will get marched into the palace, if not they will just be looked after my police until someone can get them, and it can happen more often than you think

I guess cooling underwear is not in your approved list of equipment.

it can be!

What are you supposed to do if someone tries to touch you or goes to grab your gun?

We respond appropriately, we might shout stand back, we might March up to them and shout, we might point our rifle. Or we might arrest someone.

Did you aspire to do that duty or did you fall into it somehow?

It was always something I knew I was going to do.

Well congrats on getting there then!

Thank you!

Have you ever seen ghosts in any of the old locations you have been to?

The tower is haunted😳

How did that nutter with a crossbow get inside Windsor Castle last December? Are there not Queen's Guard stationed there too?

There are guards there and police, my guess is he didn’t go through the front gate where the security is, either way they were apprehended within less than a few mins.

Is the hat heavy? Do you get to keep the uniform?

It’s not that it’s heavy, it just digs into your head at the front and can be so awful after hours

Are there women in the Queen’s Guard?

Not in my regiment, but there is some, I was in training with a few

Whats the word going round the barracks after that bloke disguised as a priest blagged his way in for the night?

EDIT: auto correct

I can’t comment on that but it wasn’t at the ‘Guards’ barracks (Wellington barracks) it is reported to have happened at Victoria barracks which is the Coldstream guards barracks for their battalion, not their ceremonial comapny.

How long does your regiment do the guard/ceremonial duties before you switch back to being normal soldiers?

There’s always someone there, there’s people based there all the time and based in other locations all the time, there’s not a specific time to be in London.

My understanding is that you are a full member of the British Military. If the UK went to war overseas would you be eligible to be sent there? Or would you stay in your current role and protect the Royal Family at home?

I would go overseas and fight, I am a British army soldier, although some of us who’d I have to stay and protect the royal residences and family.

Are you currently sitting perfectly still at the computer while you do this ama?

I’m currently in the pub getting pissed

What's your favourite pizza and pizza toppings?

If I’m basic I like pepperoni, but if I’m feeling like more I’ll have maybe ham, or a meet feast or something like that!

Show do you stand at attention so long? Have you ever passed out? I know the tricks of clenching muscles and wiggling toes to get blood flowing, but they only work so well. Also, when you start marching after a long time in one position, do you feel really off balance?

Luckily we don’t stand to attention for that long, we stand at ease but not easy. We will March anytime we feel like it as long as it’s not more than 10 mins since the last March (patrol)

Is it true that there is a protocol to follow should you faint? I’ve heard that you have to keep the same pose whilst fainting or something along those lines?

It’s smarter to faint in the position of attention.

Is there any protocol for people who wear religious headdress (muslims, Sikhs, etc) and keep a beard? I assume they can’t wear the hat right?

yes they have their own rules, just google Queen's Guard Sikh

How close could I get to you before I get a bayonet shoved in my face?

If you have a bayonet in your face you’ve done more than just be close to me, but every guardsman has their limits of how close they like people to come

Is it true that if you ever break or crack a smile on duty then you'll go to jail?

We won’t go to jail. If we keep doing it and it’s just really unprofessional, we might get charged money or extra duties and so on

What’s the cutest encounter with the public you’ve had? Anything like children running up and hugging your legs?

just things like when a child is scared to come over to me and their parents are trying to convince them, then they come and see you and they're all cute and say thank you and stuff, it can be really cute!

Do you ever get a boner and have to stand there and hope no one notices because you can’t readjust?

100%

Might be an odd question but do you know of any guardsman who smoke?

I can say most guardsmen I know smoke. Not me though.

Do you like your job? Does it pay well? In short, is it worth it?

sometimes it can feel like, whats the point, but really its okay

what nationality of tourist annoys you the most?

Hahaha well i can't really comment on that as I might come across as racist or offensive, what I can say is not everyone is the same I have met annoying, funny, and just stupid people from every nationality I come across.

What non threatening event would cause you to leave your post? For example. If you saw a vehicle accident. Would you be able to help or still required to stand guard?

If I was at Buckingham palace, I’d let the police deal with it, they’d get their quicker and be more practical, I can’t move very well in the uniform, if I was in Windsor Castle and someone collapsed in front of me, I’d not hesitate to deliver first aid or cpr or whatever I can do to help

I'm a preist (honest), can I stay at your barracks?

You’ll have to ask the Coldstream Guards ;)

What are some foods and drink you like? What are some places you like to visit?

I LOVE an Indian takeaway, Lamb tikka masala and naan bread, and guards will drink anything! Give a Scots guardsman a bottle of Buckfast and help love you forever!

Can PPL of other ethnicity like Indian or African be a queen guard ?

https://apply.army.mod.uk/en/how-to-join/can-i-join/nationality

Should milk go into a cup of tea first or last?

How I make a couple of tea: Tea bag in. Hot water in. Stir, squeeze bag with spoon. Take out bag. (Sugar if applicable) Put in a bit of milk.

Do you like fish and chips?

yes!

Are there instances of guards hooking up with each other in uniform?

well, there are male and female guards, so no matter what you're into you're covered, and we all have the uniform... I don't know their personal life, but they defiantly could if they really wanted to.

Grenadier or Coldstream Guards?

Actually, Scots Guards. There are 5 grenadier, Coldstream, Scots, Irish and Welsh, although grenadier, Coldstream and Scots, are there permanently.

What're your views on the Monarchy?

We aren’t suppose to publicly talk about our political views.

What the heck do you think about during your shifts?

Anytime and everything, however a lot of it is good people watching.

Is it true that the queen eats spaghetti without any sauce ?

That's a strange spaghetti policy.

That’s a matter of national security.

Do you enjoy stagging on?

At first, maybe once or twice.

What's your honest thoughts about Harry leaving his role?

I wish HRH the best of luck and I can’t share my political views sorry.

Most hated nationality?

I can’t comment

Are you a royalist?

I can’t share my political views.