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IAMA 22-year-old Bedwetter in college. For medical reasons, I must wear diapers at night.
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ConnorFilmm33 karma
Yes. This is mostly because I am aware of my intake of fluids, and I can feel the "urge" when I need to use the restroom.
SolanaceaeEnthusiast31 karma
Uhm.
So...
Do you date or...?
How were sleepovers when you were younger?
ConnorFilmm86 karma
I do date, but I haven't had a gf since 2014. I told my last gf about my medical issues six months into relationship and she dumped me SO fast.
I rarely attended sleepovers as a kid because of this. If I went to a sleepover, I always asked to sleep in a separate room.
GoingBackToKPax42 karma
That sucks, man. People can be so shallow. You will find somebody who doesn't care. You're fit, and decent looking in your photo. I myself wouldn't care if my partner had to wear a different type of undergarment to bed than other guys. (I am a guy so I can't speak for women on their views). But that girl you were dating was a twit if that is the reason she left you. It is better to find out they are idiots early on though, so look at it as a blessing. Imagine if you had married that horrible girl!
ConnorFilmm60 karma
It was an absolute blessing in disguise. My friends joke with me that I need to pursue a nurse. They probably see worse shit than this in the ER and elderly care.
ConnorFilmm72 karma
I have a few who know and are familiar. I got drunk once and they stole my pants. I literally was drunk and walking around in nothing but a diaper and t-shirt at midnight. It was hilarious. They are good people.
SolanaceaeEnthusiast11 karma
So is it psychological or is their some muscle or nerve issues at play? Or the docs dont know?
SolanaceaeEnthusiast6 karma
How common is that? Was it an accident or something from birth?
ConnorFilmm19 karma
How common
It's somewhat common. About two out of every 100 young adults wet the bed at night. And it was something I've had from birth. My bladder is just abnormally sized.
SolanaceaeEnthusiast10 karma
2%? Get out of town! , so whats the moving forward plan? Medication? Surgery? Do they have nocturnal enuresis support groups?
ConnorFilmm7 karma
I have tried various forms of medication. Most have not agreed with my liver/kidneys. There is surgery to widen the ureters tubes from my kidneys to bladder, but that still wouldn't fix my small bladder size.
I've been to a few bedwetting support groups.
noshore4me20 karma
Does the wetness protection give you confidence to drink all night long with no fear of having to do laundry the next morning?
ConnorFilmm30 karma
Honestly? Yeah. I have one diaper brand that absorbs almost 5000ML. I never have to worry about leaking or anything.
noshore4me16 karma
That sounds actually pretty nice if you're crushing beers all night. Sweet silver lining.
ConnorFilmm21 karma
Nights like those are where I actually appreciate the diapers. They certainly come in handy.
Ranakor4 karma
Wait what, 5 whole liters? That just sounds massive, upside is you could decide to only take a piss every 2-3 days lol
mikey_says2 karma
Yeah, 5000 milliliters is 5 liters. That is a lot of liquid. Over 2 gallons.
edit: Almost 2 gallons. I stand corrected.
OverEasyGoing3 karma
This feels like Die Hard 3 in the fountain. Picturing that being dumped in a diaper is blowing my mind.
ConnorFilmm2 karma
I know exactly what scene you're talking about. I just laughed so hard.
ConnorFilmm2 karma
I'm stupid. Lmao. This is why I flunked math in HS. 5000ML equals 1.3 gallons is what I was trying to say.
ConnorFilmm27 karma
Because I buy diapers from that company from time to time and the owner gave me it as a gift. That company has better products than brands like Depends, surprisingly. When you're in my situation, you look at all products and all options. I naturally discovered the site.
ConnorFilmm23 karma
They do. Their products are advertised as holding 5000ml - far more than Depends and store brand. I've also talked to owner and I'm not the only person with medical issues ordering from them.
ConnorFilmm6 karma
Yep. I actually saw that Tykables got in the news a few months ago. I came across them via Washington Post.
ConnorFilmm19 karma
It's essential a combo of small ureters and bladder. As of now it is lifelong. I've had these issues since I was four/five.
HoneyNutDildos2 karma
Do you think this could be linked with sleeping habits when you were young? I had the same problem up until 11ish (don't remember when I stopped) same thing, those weird alarm things they gave me never seemed to work, years later I remembered I used to sleep on my stomach with my arm crossed under me pushing into my stomach, felt like that may have had an effect (pushing into the bladder as I was sleeping). I'm not saying that's the case for you currently, but do you think something similar could have had an effect on the growth of your bladder growing up or is it pure genetics?
ConnorFilmm9 karma
I also sleep on my stomach! I'm not sure tbh? I'm now curious if that affected the growth of my bladder. I think my bladder size is genetic, however.
OhRatFarts1 karma
Can you just not drink anything for like 4 or so hours before bed so that you know your bladder won't fill in the night?
ConnorFilmm5 karma
I could, but that makes my life a living hell. I'm 22 and young. I want to drink whatever I want, when I want. I've tried limiting my intake towards bed and it doesn't do that much.
Socrete9 karma
Aren't there bladder systems that would be less... unappealing than diapers? Like, you'd stay clean even if you peed.
ConnorFilmm18 karma
I have tried multiple pills. Most have had adverse affects on my liver or kidney. The last drug I was on was called DDAVP.
I tried bedwetting alarms as a kid/teen. They didn't do much.
Princess_Parvo8 karma
What is nocturnal enuresis? Is it a control issue, or a bladder size issue?
Is this something that there is any treatment or resolvement for?
What kind of lifestyle changes do you have that we may not realize?
ConnorFilmm23 karma
Lifestyle changes? Well, it has certainly made my dating life a total bitch. But I've always kinda been at a disadvantage because I also have Aspergers and ADHD. A few of my close friends know, so if I ever wanna drink at their place or spend the night it's not a big deal.
nicebootsy9 karma
I also have asbergers and adhd. And growing up I had bed wetting issues as well. Also took DDAVP like you did and even the alarms. The alarms bugged the hell out of my parents I remember because I would just sleep through the alarm(I was a very heavy sleeper as a child) so inevitably they would have to get up and deal with me. Maybe around 10 or so I noticed that I went a couple days without wetting the bed and eventually I just stopped wearing my diapers all together. I'm sorry it's not the case for you bro. I feel for you.
campcope7 karma
I actually wonder whether Aspergers and/or ADHD correlate with bed wetting.
ConnorFilmm6 karma
I also wonder that. I'm seeing a few individuals with ADHD/Aspergers posting in here...
ConnorFilmm7 karma
Nocturnal enuresis is involuntary urination that happens at night while sleeping. Docs think it is combination of me having a smaller bladder than normal and my ureters are thinner than normal. Ureters are tube-like structures that carry pee from the kidney to the bladder.
ConnorFilmm18 karma
Yeah. But so does Hillary. I'm legitimately concerned with how the next four years will play out.
tunamelts220 karma
I guess you'll end up...
( •_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
pissing away your vote one way or the other.
Yehhe5 karma
Not many grown people have to deal with diaper rash.. do you use a special kind of powder or wipes?
ConnorFilmm15 karma
Regular wipes. Regular powder. I use butt paste from time to time to deal with occasional rashes. I know some might think because of the diapers I'm disgusting or smell. I actually am extremely hygienic, probably more so than most guys because of this.
ConnorFilmm14 karma
A. Briefs at day, Pampers at night. Hahaha.
B. It doesn't give me a lot of confidence. When I have interacted with a girl sexually or romantically, the diapers didn't come up tho. My last gf was the first romantic partner I told. But considering it went badly, it didn't instill me with a lot of confidence.
hyperproliferative4 karma
Are you sure you've exhausted all pharmacological interventions?
ConnorFilmm5 karma
I actively pursue any new pharmacological interventions. Pills have been the obvious choice. But as I have said a few times on here, most had adverse effects with my kidneys/bladder.
hyperproliferative7 karma
Have you consulted an endocrinologist? This issue is often hormonal in nature and nothing to do with nephrology.
ConnorFilmm6 karma
An endocrinologist? No. I might need to look into that. I just know when I went to doctors and urologists, the x-rays and various tests showed my thin ureters and small bladder size. Most determined that was the cause of this.
hyperproliferative16 karma
I'm an oncologist and that's just far too little evidence to rule out a very typical hormonal imbalance that can remain well into adulthood.
ConnorFilmm7 karma
Hmmm. Thank you for bringing this up. I need to look into this. What's the harm, right?
Sirsqwertlot243 karma
What kind of diaper do you use? what's the cost per package? Where can you find them? I'm going through the same shit, so I feel you 100%
ConnorFilmm4 karma
I use stuff from XP Medical: http://www.xpmedical.com And while it is an ABDL/Diaper fetish site, the products on here are so reliable and absorb so much. I use the Simple: https://www.abuniverse.com/Simple_p_78.html
ohnowut3 karma
Woah! I didn't know nocturnal enuresis existed in adults, so thanks for doing an AMA. Do you feel slightly emasculated when wearing diapers? How about the whole fetish side of it; any ladies that really dig you for it?
Also, I see your image is posted through tumblr. What's your url so I can follow you?
ConnorFilmm8 karma
Sometimes I feel slightly emasculated. The worst was when my ex dumped me because the diapers made me seem like a baby to her.
I've researched the fetish side. The ABDL thing? It is interesting and I've immersed myself with the community. I would be lucky enough to find any ladies that "dug" the dips.
BedWetter20002 karma
Is it an issue any of your family has had to deal with? I was a bed wetter until 22. Tried several consults and alternate options when I was a kid. It didn't change until I actually got married. It was the same exact scenario for my mother. Having someone sleep next to me just very quickly changed how my body slept. I don't know it was a purely psychological/emotional issue or if it was a mental awareness thing. But at this point I'm 10 years piss free except this one time I got super wasted.
Anyways, I know obviously the bed wetting complicates the relationship factor as well as individual confidence, but have you ever looked into a therapist approach as well?
ConnorFilmm1 karma
I have gone to therapy a few times. I think I need to go back, however.
hoverfordetails2 karma
Was surgery ever an option? I'm curious if the ureter size is 'fixable'.
Also, what are you studying in school?
Edit: third question. Have you tried an external catheter, or is the diaper option just more convenient?
ConnorFilmm6 karma
Catheters give me nightmares. Diapers are so much more convenient. See, the ureter size is "fixable," but the size of my bladder would still be an issue.
I'm studying journalism! I'm focused on film/entertainment writing. But I can cover serious topics.
vegetaman31131 karma
My 8 year old is not responding to medication. My wife has a bladder sling (that needs repair). Do you think there is a genetic cause, and what techniques have you tried to stop it? We are alays looking for advice, and your situation seems like you might have some advice.
ConnorFilmm2 karma
I did not respond to medication well, too. I do think there might be a genetic cause. When the pills didn't work, my parents looked at surgery options and diapers.
ConnorFilmm1 karma
Thanks for the AMA everyone! I appreciate the sincere questions and respect.
huygens21 karma
I didn't know this was a thing. I thought bed wetters were lazy or have sleep problems or something.
Do you have issues when your awake? Like on long road trips do you stop every exit?
What if anything helps it?
How did your parents treat you before the diagnosis?
Why can't you just wake up and go pee? If my bladder is full it wakes me up from a dead sleep sometimes it even hurts.
Could you help by strengthening your muscles with some keigels or something?
ConnorFilmm5 karma
It is less to do with my muscles and more to do with my thin ureters and small bladder size. I have no issues when I'm awake. But in your road trip scenario? I indeed would have to stop a lot to pee. My parents are totally understanding about all this. My dad loves to give me shit. Haha.
Angryfriend65441 karma
Has anyone in school found out about it? Has anyone made fun of you for it?
ConnorFilmm5 karma
Nope. Nobody in school has discovered this. And the friends I told were accepting. I wasn't made fun of.
losangelesgeek881 karma
What have urologists offered thus far, and have you seen at least a few different ones?
ConnorFilmm1 karma
I have seen a few different ones; yes. They always offer pills, but when you do your research, they always have bad side effects.
TheGreatCrouton-3 karma
Your proof is a picture of you in a diaper? You could have just put on a diaper for the picture! We need a picture of a bin full of discarded old diapers if we're to believe you.
JK. I believe you.
ConnorFilmm13 karma
Lmao. The fact that I had to prove this and post a picture made me roll me eyes. Yes, I like to lie and tell people I wear diapers to bed.
ConnorFilmm5 karma
Some nights I do. Other nights I'm lazy and don't. I'm gonna wake up wet anyway.
TheGreatCrouton1 karma
Seems I'm getting the downvotes I deserve for being an ass. I hope I didn't offend you. I know people who have struggled with bed wetting issues, so I know it can be tough. Hopefully everything works out for ya. Oh, and...
I'm gonna wake up wet anyway.
That problem isn't exclusive to bed wetters ;)
ConnorFilmm4 karma
I have gotten pussy lol. I don't think anyone can call me a poon hound or anything tho...
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MoSqueezin42 karma
Damn, I'm sorry. Sooo during the day you can control your urine?
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