EDIT: Thanks everyone. This was fun.

See you out there!

Comments: 433 • Responses: 83  • Date: 

YourWebcamIsOn94 karma

your best night:

G_dude328 karma

A drug dealer got so mad at me that he threw a gangster roll of twenties at my head as he was getting out of the car. He was loaded and didn’t realize what he had thrown at me until he was out of the car. I sped away with close to $500.
EDIT: spelling

YourWebcamIsOn86 karma

whoa, nice! unless that guy hunts you down to get his change back. Why was he mad?

G_dude159 karma

He was loaded and I couldn't understand what he was saying. He increasingly got more and more pissed off because I kept saying. "Sorry dude, I have no idea what you're saying" Somehow he took that very personal.

divs_pl128 karma

Oh loaded. Where I live it means rich not drunk.

G_dude109 karma

can mean both here.

bukkakeenthusiast79 karma

If he were to go to the beach what number SPF sunscreen would he use? Support your answer.

G_dude61 karma

He was a white guy, had a big ugly full neck tatoo and mentioned something about having just been released from jail.

naimnotname16 karma

OH. He got mad because he thought you mocking him for being a wigger. Of course.

G_dude14 karma

Something like that. I’m fairly articulate and that does seem to make some people pissed off. One of those things I don’t understand.

huushuur1 karma

Sorry for the grammar nazi post. I hope you REALIZE that 'relies' is misspelled.

G_dude7 karma

I do. Yet I continue to do it, over and over again since forever.

dev-heg73 karma

Please tell a good story involving puking, a fight, or sex...or all 3

G_dude189 karma

A college girl coming out to her girlfriend in the back seat. I was taking two college girls home from the club. They were both drunk. "I have something very important to tell you, I have the biggest crush on you" It was funny because the other girl was making eye contact with me via the rear view. She had this look on her face that said. "WTF? HELP ME" I'd like to tell you that they ended up making out or something....but that didn't happen. The other girl was obviously not into it.

French87269 karma

That story did not involve puking, a fight, OR sex.

I am disappoint.

potentialredditor68 karma

I am disappoint, also.

G_dude16 karma

I was disappoint at the time too.

BlackGuyOne63 karma

Any girls ever flash for cab fare?

G_dude272 karma

They offer. I always tell them the same thing. “If you really want to show off your body, go ahead, but this is my job that I do to make money to pay my bills so you will be paying the fare.” They usually flash anyway…and then pay the fare.


TIL I should become a cab driver

G_dude111 karma

I never thought i'd be a cab driver. It wasn't exactly my career of choice but it' been interesting. I've dated girls that I met in the cab.


That's pretty interesting. Were you just like, "Well we're at your house. Hey how about some digits?"

G_dude123 karma

No. I never instigate it. Usually its drunk girls that come on to me. I've been asked to come in a "party" with girls. If I like them i'll give them my number and tell them that if they still think its a good idea after they sober up in the morning to call me. A few called the next day.

One girl was new to town and was going on about how she needed someone to show her around town. She kept talking about this and I wasn't getting the point. When we got to her house she said it one more time and just stared at me not getting out of the car. I finally clued in and offered to show her around and we exchanged phone numbers.

adamdenterkin25 karma

I Bike Taxi in the French Quarter. I have had to explain to several people that i see plenty of free boobs, and i need actual money for a fare.

G_dude35 karma

Exactly. Then on your day off you can go and pay to see boobs if you so desire. lol It's nice to be able to pay the rent.

shennentel59 karma

Has anyone ever jumped in your cab and said "Follow that car"

G_dude96 karma

Yes but always in jest.

Engineer91358 karma


G_dude166 karma

Twice last week.

Me_Myself_And_Pie55 karma

What is the most "What the fuck" moment that has happened to you at work?

G_dude166 karma

I picked up a lady from the hospital that was naked except for a towel. The fare was on social service's account and I was to take her to a women's shelter. She begged me to take her by her "house" first as she wanted to pick up some clothes. It was on the way, and she was naked, so I did. Her "house" turned out to be a dirty ass motel. Her "clothes" turned out to be a 60oz. bottle of vodka that she proceeded to put a big dent in on the way to the shelter.

G_dude106 karma

A colleague of mine picked up a skin head at a house where they had a guy bound and gaged. He could see this through the open front door. There were other dudes punching him in the face. He said it seemed to be consensual. Some sort of fetish thing.

jelly_soup49 karma

Who are typically the more polite/friendly passengers, dudes or chicks?

G_dude141 karma

Chicks...no contest. At bar close we have a few hours where we can really pick and choose who we pick up because there are so many people wanting rides. Girls are much less likely to cause a hassle, pick a fight or be obnoxious then guys are. It does happen though. Guys just think it’s because the dirty cab drive wants to look at pretty girls. And although looking at pretty girls is alright too, my personal safety is really the driving force.

mechanicallazarus44 karma

Also, what's the most random thing that has been left behind in your cab?

G_dude254 karma

Nothing too strange stands out. A lady once left her entire purse in the car though. It's common to find cell phones, id, wallets ect but how does someone miss thier entire purse??? It was a big ass mom purse too.

Another time: I had just dropped this dude off and was driving away and heard his cell phone ringing. I answered it to tell him I would turn around and bring it back to him. But then he started yelling at me as if it was my fault he left it in the car. So then the cell phone accidentally fell out the window of the moving cab.


I assume shit falls out of your window all the time?

G_dude126 karma

Only when people purposely leave garbage in the car in which case it gets deposited in their driveway and sometimes mailbox.

fat-_-lip43 karma

The worst thing you have seen.

G_dude115 karma

The worst thing I see on a regular basis are drug addicts. We know where they're buying, who they owe money too extra. Seeing these people on a slow and steady decline is very sad.

b_lee440 karma

I just want to say thank you. I graduated, but I always loved the college town taxi's. $3 one way, and you put up with a lot of stuff. (I don't know if it's the same at your town).

G_dude24 karma

Hey thanks!

wilcocks32 karma

How did you get into being a taxi driver?

G_dude54 karma

Before I started driving taxi I was working as a business consultant and making very good money. Since 2008 the market started drying up. Savings depleted. I was looking for any kind of work just to pay the bills and I met a guy at a party who owns some of the cabs in town. He offered me a job and I took it.

wilcocks19 karma

I have wondered about being a driver, just out of curiosity. Do you ever think about or plan to go completely solo, or is it better to stay sub-contracted in your area?

G_dude31 karma

It would be very difficult to "go solo" if I understand that correctly.

Each car in our company is independantly owned. So in essence every car is 'solo' with access to dispatch etc.

It works differently in every city.

pwnyoface3 karma

so tell me more about the average taxi life. Everyone is asking for stories, but what is it normally? What is the pay like? The hours? Is it mostly just driving people and chatting them up? or do you have a boss you report to regularly?

G_dude13 karma

12 hour shifts suck. I never truly relised how bad people smell until I started this. My boss would be the guy that owns the car. I rarely see him. In fact its a fairly loney job. You've got people in and out of the car but you don't know them and they are in the car for 10 mins or less at a time. Dispatch is all digital so you don't even talk to them. When its really slow you might hang out with another driver and chat for a bit but ideally if you want a fare you should be in a part of the city where other cabs aren't.

Krakil_Frostborn32 karma

Has it ever gotten so messy that you had to throw out the customers(passengers)?

G_dude68 karma

YES. Not very often but Yes it happens. In fact i'd be interested in hearing from any lawyers or cops out there about this. I'm curious to know to what extent I can force someone out of the car that I don't want there. Am I allowed to physically remove someone who won't leave on there own?? btw. I'm in Canada.

hrhomer23 karma

I'm sure there'a cab drivers organization you can contact with specifically this question.

G_dude37 karma

You think? I'm not aware of any.

swiggs9819 karma

I'm not sure about Canada, but I know that in some areas of US if someone doesn't leave the cab when you ask them to, it counts as trespassing, and they could get fined

G_dude30 karma

Problem with this is that you don't necessarily want to involve the police with all of these situations. As mentioned before the police, for some reason, don't really like dealing with taxi issues and typically make the situation worse for the driver. For women drivers or small dudes I'd recommend that they call the police. I'm a big guy and I don't mind draggin someone out of the car by force. I'm just curious to know if I'm legally allowed to do that.

vtjohnhurt8 karma

I'm surprised that you're not able to make friends with some of the local cops. You both has to deal with the same drunk people etc..

G_dude16 karma

YOu're right and occasionally the cops see it that way but unfortunatly for the most part the cabbies aren't treated well at all.

valpal1874 karma

Fellow Canadian here! Do you remember ever hearing a story that was heavily covered in Canada where a young man got a cab after a party and he was so drunk and about to puke in the cab that the driver kicked him out in the middle of a highway? (He got hit moments after the cab driver sped away and died later in hospital).

Any stories from colleagues who have gotten in trouble for kicking someone out?

G_dude19 karma

If we're kicking someone out of the car it's most likely we're not getting paid for the fare, so if it happens, it's for a good reason and i've never heard of anyone getting in trouble for it. That being said I would never leave anyone in the middle of a highway. Especially if they're drunk.

[deleted]-3 karma


G_dude8 karma

Why would it be better if I was in a college town in the states?

Occasionally I’ll come across someone by themselves, completely drunk and lost and conveniently without money. I’ll get them home if I can especially in the winter.

[deleted]-3 karma


G_dude4 karma

You're stating that as if it's a fact, I'm sure you have some stats or something to prove this then.

My boss wouldn't ever know and if he did I'm sure he wouldn't care as long as I made some money for us that night.

[deleted]0 karma


G_dude5 karma

My pleasure.

thejockthejock32 karma

Im about to start working as a taxi driver in a college town aswell. Could you give me some beginners advice? :)

G_dude78 karma

If, for whatever reason, you think they might not pay. Get money up front.

You don't have to pick up everyone who calls or flags you donw. If they look like something more than you can handle, don't let them in the car. Keep the doors locked. You want to get a look at the person before they get into your car.

Sdetolve31 karma

How often do you have to drive someone to the Hospital?

G_dude59 karma

Every day. I once had a lady who informed me halfway to the hospital that she had a piece of meat stuck in her throat. She asked if I knew how to do the Heimlich maneuver just in case. I told her that if she was that concerned that she maybe should be calling an ambulance instead. She made it to the hospital just fine.

Zaseishinrui80 karma

yeah she wanted a "piece of meat" stuck in her throat and she wanted the "Heimlich maneuver" man you really dont take a hint do you?

G_dude48 karma


I guess I don't

antici-pation7 karma

Any other good hospital run stories?

G_dude45 karma

A guy leaving the hospital after being admitted for over-dosing on cough syrup. I've never seen pupils that big before.

TheCasemanCometh25 karma

How many times have you had a fare stiff you and just run off?

G_dude50 karma

This does happen on occasion but I’m finding that with more experience I have in the business it happens less and less. You start to recognize the potential runners and get them to pay up front. Out of town trips are always paid up front. I won’t make that mistake again. One of the warning signs of a “runner” is when someone asks to be dropped off at an intersection or very general area instead of an actual address.

losttobefound23 karma

How many times have you had college kids throw up in your taxi? And were you compensated in any way?

G_dude55 karma

This is my worst fear. Who wants to clean up puke?? If anyone looks even close to throwing up I hand them a plastic bag. So far the only person to ever throw up without one was an older man coming from a dinner party. I didn't see it coming.

G_dude56 karma

We have a $150 fine for people who do vomit in the car. And it happens and they pay.

Social_Recluse13 karma

What if they don't have the money? I'm a college kid (would never puke in a car, but I know for sure a lot of my friends would), and I usually don't carry around 150$ with me in Chicago

G_dude24 karma

hard to say. hasn't happened. I will say that I would make them clean it up themselves though, with the meter running.

mubgub1422 karma

Who is the mysterious person on the other end of the phone? Every cabbie here in Calgary (hello fellow Canadian!) always has a headset on, muttering on the phone to someone (typically not English).

More often than not, if their phone is visible, the call timer shows usually 2 or 3 hours!

G_dude38 karma

No one or another cab driver. They don't want to talk to you. You can't talk to them if they're on the phone.

mubgub1413 karma

Hmm. Seems legit enough I guess. While initially I guess this might seem rude, I can't imagine talking to people for 12 hours a day about the weather or local sports team is very interesting!

G_dude29 karma

It does get exhausting having the same conversation over and over again every 10 mins. Although I do try to be friendly its surprising how some people don't catch the hint that someone isn't interested in chatting. It happens both ways. I've had passengers complain about other chatty drivers too.

mechanicallazarus17 karma

How many people get it on in the back of your cab and what is the furthest you've seen two people go....

G_dude40 karma

-last summer a chicky traddled her nightly prey, took off her shirt and started grinding away. -skiing is quite common....thats three people mind you. -fingering and hand jobs are also quite common. I think they think I don't know whats going on.

mechanicallazarus19 karma

also - skiing??!?

G_dude120 karma

So three people are in the back seat. The person in the middle, usually a girl, grabbs the "poles" of the guys on either side of her and ski away. Try this at home, it's fun!

mechanicallazarus9 karma

Thanks. Do you often intervene or just let them get it on?

G_dude55 karma

Who am I to disturb?

coolmantown16 karma

Do you do stuff to make the ride more entertaining? Like play games or music or trivia? If so, what's your favorite?

G_dude56 karma

I tend to not want to encourge people to be "more entertaining". Sort of like poking a hornets' nest. There are people who expect A LOT from their cab drivers. They want us to be their clown, bestfriend, tour-guide and priest all in one. My job is to get you to your destination, period.

puredemo14 karma

Edit: Verified, thanks!

G_dude8 karma

what sort of proof would you like? I can send you a pic of my taxi license but I don't want that public. Or what else might work?

omnomnomster13 karma

Is a tip expected? If so, how much is typical/reasonable?

G_dude64 karma

Not expected but appreciated. 10 to 15% is typcial.

Funny thing: 99% of the people who in anyway mention the word "tip" to me, don't tip me anything. Usally in the form of "Don't worry about......i'll give you a big tip"

Remember this: The best tip is the one that goes without mention. The word tip should never come out of someones' mouth.

JonathanDnD12 karma

What is the scariest situation you have ever been in?

G_dude32 karma

I'm a big guy and can handle myself so I don't intimidate easily so the scariest situation was a 90 lb girl that was cracked out and violent. Cracked out or not i'm not hitting a girl so I felt helpless.

intentsman12 karma

ever been robbed?

G_dude31 karma

Thankfully not. Although people who run off without paying is stealing. Worst part of that is how the cops really don't back us up. The cops tend to make it sounds like its out fault and don't want to do anything about it. Pretty shitty.

baltimorescouser9 karma

How much money do you make a week? also, what time frame(mornings/nights)do you prefer to work?

G_dude24 karma

I won't get into specifics of what I make but I'll tell you that it's a percentage of the meter. So if the car doesn't make any money then I don't make any money. I was pleasantly surprised at what one can make doing this. You have to work the hours to do it though. Long hours. I prefer nights because the money is better. Also the roads are essentially ours at night. No traffic is nice.

TheCapeman12 karma

"Nights - that's when all the scum comes out.."

G_dude14 karma

True. Days are when the grumpy monotony happens though. Which can be a nice change at times. EDIT:spelling

PopuIus9 karma


G_dude12 karma

Some sort of entertainent is essential, there are boughts of inactivity throughout a shift that get pretty boring without a book, video game, laptop, etc.

seanmmcardle9 karma

Do you keep a gun in your car for self defense?

G_dude104 karma

I'm in Canada.

SilverBadger768 karma

That is to say you don't need one or it's too hard to get one?

G_dude46 karma

Don't need one, would be hard to get one, wouldn't know how to use one, wouldn't use one, would go to jail for a long time if ever caught with one.

thewaybaseballgo9 karma

What do you do if someone asks you where to find drugs/if you would help them find drugs? I knew a cab driver in Dallas several years ago and he got berated with this question all the time.

G_dude33 karma

Even though I know very well where you can find whatever it is you're looking for. I'm not about to involve myself. There are all kinds of ways for that to go sideways quick.

chemical_mcfly8 karma

I live in a German college town and we have guy who started a blog about his job as a taxi driver. So most of the stories here aren't that new to me, but still an awesome AMA! For those who understand German here is his blog: http://www.taxi-blog.de/wordpress/

G_dude11 karma

I've thought of doing this. You see so much crazy shit every day that you forget a lot of it. It would be good to at least write it down.

MC_Alka7 karma

Dont you wish you were having fun with all these kids instead? how old are you and what town do you live in?

G_dude18 karma

I'm in my late 30s so I've done my fair share of partying and won't party with university kids at this point. It does suck working weekends though when everyone else it out having a good time.

madnessthemagnet7 karma

How mad do you get if someone doesn't leave a tip? My boyfriend and I took a taxi in a very touristy area, and I assumed our taxi driver thought we were clueless tourists too, leading him to take a much longer route: costing $10 more on the tab than it usually takes. Therefore he got no tip.

G_dude5 karma

I appreciate any tip I recieve but I don't expect one.

Also, don't assume the driver was purposly taking a longer route. Even in a small city you can't know all the best routes. It could be that the driver doesn't know.

I get accused of doing this all the time and I would never do it on purpose. And a lot of people have some strange ideas of what fast routes are. A lot of time the passenger is simply wrong.

omnomnomster7 karma

I'm in Vancouver and we have pretty aggressive taxi drivers who in my opinion drive pretty dangerously. I'd think they want to extend a trip in order to run the meter longer but they're all go go go. Have you ever gotten pulled over or in an accident from running a red/cutting someone off/etc?

G_dude30 karma

For the most part I drive within the speed limit and very safely. My record is crystal clear.

Also, I know that there are taxi drivers that will purposly try to run up the meter but please don't assume everyone does that. It's exhausting being constantly accused of trying to rip people off. If I make a mistake by not taking the most direct route, i'll gladly discount the fare. If you're an ass about it. You'll pay the full fare and my personality might come out for a visit.

Zsymon6 karma

Do you have to reimburse for the ride then runners? Are you allowed to activate the child door locks in the back to keep people from running without paying?

I know it would be annoying to have to let people out all the time, but it beats getting ripped off.

G_dude8 karma

I don't have to reimburse but I think some companies do. I have full control of the locks and it just become habit to unlock the doors after they've paid and are ready to get out of the car. Even when I'm driving my personal car i'm constantly locking the doors.

cheesemakerpride545 karma

Did you find my wallet I lost in November?

G_dude23 karma


The thing about this is that we find so much shit that the office doesn't want to deal with it anymore. They've told us to bring everything we find into the police station. Problem there is that for everything we bring into the police station we have to fill out a report. Who wants to do that every night??? So now we don't find anything in the car anymore. If you know what I mean.

AndreThe30004 karma

Ever think about doing your own version of Cash Cab?

G_dude12 karma

No. Passengers ask about that all the time though. Often enough that it's annoying.

emmaleeatwork7 karma

My personal favorite line in regards to that- "Ask me a question!!" "Why?" But my least favorite thing is "What's the craziest thing that's ever happened in your taxi?" "The number of people who have asked me that question."

G_dude13 karma

I know. Most asked question. Sometimes I just make stuff up.

djarris4 karma

how often to people leave phones, or other items of value, in your cab?

G_dude7 karma

I try to remind people to double check before they get out but it still happens all the time. I should start selling the IDs I have.

DollarMenuHero11 karma

Fun Fact: if you find a driver's license you can drop it in any mailbox as is. The Postal Service will mail it to the owner in an envelope with postage due.

G_dude9 karma

really?? I'll drop the dozen or so I've got in the car off tomorrow.

Social_Recluse4 karma

Why do cab drivers care so much about being payed in cash, not via credit/debit cards. I don't usually carry cash, and I've been berated by cab drivers for not having cash to the point where I make it a point to tell them I don't have any cash when I get in initially. I know whoever processes the payments takes a 5-10% cut of all plastic transactions, but it's fucking annoying and my tips have gotten smaller and smaller.

I take cabs quite often, and I'm not assuming you're one of these cab drivers. There are plenty of cool cab drivers, but it seems like a 50/50 split between chill drivers and assholes at least here in Chicago.

G_dude10 karma

I'm not one of those drivers but I know they exist. It's one of two things. They are either ripping the owner off by taking 100% of that fare, claiming the trip didn't happen or they are the owner and anyone who runs a business prefers cash. You don't have to claim it and pay taxes or pay a bank to process it.

DJzeff4 karma

what car do you drive thats not a taxi?

G_dude16 karma

you mean my personal car? It's a crappy Dodge Neon. It's all i can afford. I"m a cab driver!

jammon7983 karma

Have you ever had somone ask for you to bring them to a hooker? Like asking if you could bring them to one.

G_dude8 karma

To a "massage parlor"...sure all the time. We don't have hookers in the streets, not that kind of city.

One night this guy insisted i take him to a "massage parlor" even though I assured him that after 1AM that none would be open. He insisted and racked up a $50 cab ride driving around so he could see how they were all closed. He must have had some deep, deep down desires.

thetopshelf3 karma

Has anyone ever gotten into a fight in your cab? What is the most outrageous story thar you have?

G_dude14 karma

People fight over cabs all the time. One night two people got in the cab at the same time. They were not together and both wanted to take the cab. Neither of them would get out so I just started driving. They lived on opposite sides of the city and were kicking the shit out of each other in the back seat. They both paid me so....you know....just another night.

perche2 karma

Have you seen this?

G_dude7 karma

No. But I will watch it later. thanks

Thaerious2 karma

I'm from the same town, and it is almost impossible to catch a cab after 1am. I've waited over an hour for a cab, then give up and just walk. Why is it they won't get more cabs for night time, even though there is clearly a need? I'm just curious if there is some political maneuvering going on, or otherwise.

G_dude4 karma

Nothing political about it. Each car is independantly owned and therefore it's own business. We survice the city very well and no one waits more than 10 Mins for a cab...except for a few hours on busy bar nights. If we were to add more cars, each car being it's own business, there isn't enough business through out the week to support them. We have added some corporate cars to help with this but the cost of buying these cars doesn't pay off. I hope that makes sense. I know it sucks, i've been on the other end of this myself. Waiting in the cold downtown for hours.

keltek2 karma

How much do you make in a year? And do you own your own cab or work for a company?

G_dude4 karma

I make more than I would have though before starting doing this for a living but it's not a lot and you have to work a lot of hours to make it.

I work for a guy who owns a car that is part of a company. Hope that makes sense.

icarus142 karma

if someone was completly, like butt ass naked, clearly drunk, have no money on them, would you take their word that they had money/freinds who could spot them a fare at the destination?

G_dude7 karma

If you're butt ass naked you're not getting into my car. I'd call that into police. Way too many things to go wrong in that situation.

_Flippin_2 karma

Ok, WWYD time. Drunk couple gets in your car. Sex. WWYD

G_dude9 karma

take the long way home. For their benefit, not mine.

Bogglecrunch691 karma

Can we have a pic of you and your car?

G_dude2 karma

No, but I have verified with the mods.

FandomOfRandom1 karma

Mind telling us what town you're in? Because I'm a College kid in Canada and I'd been down to have a regular driver. :P

G_dude3 karma

I do.

We don't take calls directly, you have to call dispatch.

Tramd-2 karma

Wild, sounds like you enjoy it. I dont think it would even be possible to get a cab job like that here. I'm not the correct demographic, if you know what I mean. Apparently the laws here regulating taxi's are incredibly strict too making startups nearly impossible.

G_dude3 karma

I don't know what you mean.

Tramd-2 karma

I've never had a cab driver who wasn't an older brown man.

Never a woman, never any other ethnicity.

G_dude3 karma

I figured that's what you meant. I'm a white guy and there are several women who work for our company. I know it's not like that in many areas.

covgamer-10 karma

Define 'Fishball"

G_dude10 karma