We are Key & Peele, our new movie "Keanu" is out April 29th. Ask us anything!

Hi K&P, Love it when you guys do the enthusiastic action movie fans "The Valets”…and those characters go off on their admiration to guys like Liam Neeson, Bruce Willis and other action heroes…could you PLEASE, right now on Reddit, tell us Arnold fans what the K&P Valets would say about Schwarzenegger?

Oh, you talking about Schwartsie? You talking about Arnold Schwartzenburgers? Arnold Schwartzenburgers is my shit. He's my shiznits.

Remember that one, where he was in the jungle? And that dude came out with the dreadlocks and no mouth? And the vagina face? That was my jam.

You know man, I like the one where he was the second one when he was the computer monster, and he was talking about, "I'm here right now, but I will be back as well." That's like the greatest line that was ever in a movie ever.

When can we expect a "30 for 30" on Hingle McCringleberry? - or at least a jersey?

It’s in the works, the "30 for 30." It’s extensive, it’s going to be the first feature length "30 for 30," so it’s actually going to be the first "120 for 30." Because there’s a lot to say about Hingle McCringleberry. The guy has led a very layered, complicated life, and we’re sifting through all the material, all the footage, all of the amazing plays, all of the activist work he’s done, all of the wars that he’s not fought in, the lives he’s changed. There is a lot going on in regards to Hingle McCringleberry.

You can actually get a Hingle McCringleberry jersey, I believe, on Comedy Central.com.

And we get one penny for every 10,000 sold.

So it's been lucrative for us spiritually. So yes, that's the answer. It's in the works.

What did you both think of each other the first time you met? Also did you say bitch?

We did say biiiiiiitch.

"You good," is the first thing I said. Um, what did I first think when I met you? I guess I just thought you were tremendously talented because I saw you perform before I met you, is that right?

We saw each other perform first, and so we were fans of each others’. And then we met at a diner, and it was like the DeNiro/Pacino of comedy.

In a movie called Tepid. It was called Lukewarm. Not heat, so much. But it was good. I mean, there was heat between us, like comedy-love. But, yeah I just thought he was very clever, very brave onstage. So I couldn't wait to meet him. But in real life, I thought when I first met him that he was very thoughtful. And grounded, which was nice.

Hey Keegan and Jordan! I was having a hard time thinking of a question to ask my favorite sketch comedy duo so I just wanted to say thanks for all the inside jokes I now have with siblings because of your show. And IDEALLY you guys and myself will end up doing something in future. IDEALLY.

Also, have you guys decided who's Simon and who's Garfunkel yet?

Joebagzzzzzzzz

Joebagzzzzzzzz

Oh, thank you.

That's a tough question. You know, I think we can answer at the same time...

1.....2....3.....I'm Simon.

Let's try that one more time.

We'll make the proper adjustments.

Make the proper adjustments. Just give me a second.

1....2....3....He's Garfunkel.

1.....2....3.....I'm Simon.

Hey Keegan and Jordan! Thanks for doing this AMA.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you both wish you still had the show to "appreciate" Election 2016?

Who are y'alls comedian father figures? Whose work do you both appreciate/ponder on, that inspires you in all that you do?

And I know Keanu isn't even out yet, but if you could make a sequel to it in the future, what animal would you want to feature saving next?

Question 1:

You know, it's such a mess. This election is such a surreal dystopian fiction, that I don't know if we can bring any more absurdity to what's going on already. So I'm actually glad that we got out when we did. Otherwise, we would have to be watching everything and I don't...I can't watch this stuff.

Yeah, I agree.

Talk about real people and misery. It's the American People.

I don't have much to add to that. That's the same answer. Because we've done that in the past, where we've gotten tripped up where we've written a sketch, and somebody at Comedy Central would say, “I mean the thing that happened in real life is crazier than the sketch you've written,” so that is what we're experiencing. That is a really good question though.

Question 3: You're assuming that Keanu doesn't make it out of the first one. Talk about a dystopian future.

You know what? How about a baby cow.

Like a calf?

A calf.

Or a foal? Maybe even a foal. A baby horse. That'd be fun too.

A baby horse?

I just wanted to say "foal," and when you said baby cow I thought of a baby horse so I said, "foal".

I don't know about baby horses, they kind of look creepy when they come out with their little pin legs.

And they're in that sack.

Question 2:

I would have to say that if I had two parents, comedic parents, they would be Peter Sellers and Richard Pryor. Those are my comedic parents, and they inspired me because both of them were actors and I've always been I'm an actor first and a comedian second, and I think they both were that. Richard Pryor may not have known he was an actor first and a comedian second, but he was just a rare, rare talent. And the same for Peter Sellers. So they are my spirit animals in regard to my vocation.

I would go with Martin Lawrence and Steve Martin. Steve Martin Lawrence.

Mmm, nice mashup.

You see what I was doing?

That's a delicious mashup.

What was your all time favorite sketch to shoot for "Key & Peele"?

My all time favorite sketch for Key and Peele would have been Michael Jackson Halloween. It was one of the first sketches where we just kind of said, "Alright, let's just do it." It wasn't about the lines so much as it was about literally making Jordan laugh, and then hearing him pepper these one liners back at me, which was really just very free pure joy. I really enjoyed that sketch.

How often do people shout A-Aron at you in public?

It just happened two minutes ago. I came out of the bathroom on our break, and someone just yelled it. And I said, "What is your name sir?" He said, "Bartholomew."

So, very often. It happens very very often. It's interesting when people just say it, because I go "That's not my name..."

But they feel free. It makes them feel good, so who am I to stop them?

You are forced to live one sketch as your actual lives. Which one do you choose?

Whew, that's a really good question.

EXISTENTIAL.

We play a lot of characters that would suck to be trapped in. I would probably go with...ugh, they all have problems, don't they.

If the beginning and the end of the scene did not exist, I have no qualms about living in NegroTown for the rest of my life.

When's the last time you put the pussy on the chainwax?

Well last night I was so exhausted when I fell asleep, you know what I'm talking about? I fell asleep, just gonna say that. I slept so hard, like I slept so hard. My slumber last night really put the pussy on the chainwax.

Yeah, yeah.

That makes sense to you, right? I'm not winking, it just makes sense. When I slept I really really put the pussy on the chainwax in my dreams.

I got up, I got some coffee, I filled it right up to the perfect brim. Filling that coffee up with the pussy on the chainwax.

You had that surface tension on the top of the cup? Brother, that's when you really put the pussy on the chainwax.

Is keanu a real kitten or cg?

More than happy to answer this question -- hit ‘em Jords!

How are you both doing?

Thank you Dave for asking!

We're doing good! We're very excited to see what happens with Keanu, April 29th. It was just such a joy to be able to shoot a movie, and a movie with this cast. I think it could be a movie that could be a phenomenon that goes on for a long time. I think people will watch it and rewatch it and rewatch it again, so...we're doing good!

We're doing well. And we've been on our press tour promoting the movie, but right now we are buoyed, our energy is buoyed by the presence of Reddit. So I think we're feeding off of their energy.

When did you know Fargo was going to be that good? It could have been a bad tv version of a very, very iconic film - but it bettered it. Any good anecdotes that you can share?
^{edit: almost bettered, to just plain bettered}

Yeah, I mean we were very nervous going into it because we were such big fans of the film, and it's kind of like, why would we be in this? Why would you put Key and Peele in this? Would we not be distracting? And when we got there, Noah Hawley - the guy who created the show and is the showrunner - he's such a genius. He has a real patience and poise to him. I think we kind of figured it out as we were there. Now as far as stories go, we were in Calgary, and it was freezing.

Twelve degrees below zero, all day every day, to be exact.

Yeah, I remember the first scene we shot was our first scene in it, where Billy Bob is going up through the building shooting, and afterward we find that somebody's been thrown out of one of the windows on the ground. And between every single take, the guy on the ground had to get up and go warm up off in a van; it was that cold.

I remember there was one point in time where this poor gentleman was on the ground shaking because he was laying on the bare cement, twelve degrees below zero, and the director walked up to him, and was very kind, but he said, "I am so sorry, but is there any way you can not shiver when you're laying there as a dead body? I'm gonna need you to not shiver." Which was crazy!

The other thing that I thought Noah did that was so elegant and so wonderful, is that he simply made this new story peripheral to the original story. I think everybody was thinking, "Why would you just remake a really great movie?" What he did is, he moved everything about 40 miles down the road, and it was such a simple, ingenious decision; it made all the difference in the world. Then it allowed him to do these cool things where he's paying homage to other characters; because the culture is so homogenous, it was just a new story in a homogenous culture that he just moved down the road. It was such a simple, simple answer; such a simple, simple thing.

why Keanu? I mean of all the possible names, why pick that one? was out just the silly factor?

You know, it wasn't as calculated as a lot of people think. There's definitely the fact that the movie is a love letter to movies. We do love Keanu, we love movies like Point Break and Speed, and we wanted to put these characters in an action world. Really, it all came a moment where when we came up with the idea of the kitten it was the first name that came to my head, because I love names that only have one connotation. Once you say you're gonna put a kitten in it, and the kitten's name is Keanu, from that point forward it's a done deal. It wasn't too calculated.

You are well known as a team, for good reason. Any concern of being tied to each other like that forever? What happens if one of you ends up the Andrew Ridgeley?

First off, well integrated, based off some of the themes that take place in Keanu. I don't think that there's a risk. We're gonna be together for a long time, but we have already made concerted efforts to go out and do things in our own voice. I'm not too terribly concerned. The things that we're doing that are different than Key and Peele are so varied, and so different, that you've got to understand that we're two separate entities.

You guys recently said you play magic. What is your favorite deck to play?

This Magic thing...

This thing has been following us around, haha.

You know, I haven't played Magic for a little while, BUT I was deep into it.

Oh, you were in it.

I liked playing a dual deck - light and dark. The duality.

The juxtaposition, if you will.

But yeah, I think that was my favorite.

I hate to burst anybody's bubble. I've never played Magic.

Hey guys, I love that Hype Man sketch you did. Was it hard to stay in character the entire time?

The "Hype Man" sketch. Wampum was the character’s name. It was hard, you know. I based the character...I'm gonna ruin the sketch for you now and tell you that I based it on Animal from The Muppets. And it was hard. I remember that day, having to do it enough times and it was so physical, and just screaming the entire time that I shed about twenty pounds and was just dripping sweat. And I almost died.

So yeah, it was hard.

But Jordan will do anything for his art. I think that's the takeaway here.

Anything.

But it was hard. It was definitely hard, because it was also hard, you know, kind of corralling you. But not as hard for me as it was for you, which is to say the least.

Who would win in a fight, Iron Man or Batman?

Ironman or Batman. Is that Batman in like a servo suit or just like, regular Batman using his stealth and his wits? Because that's the question. I'm sorry, I just answered a question with a question, but I need more data.

We'll say that Batman, no servo suit. It's good old-school Batman.

Like Adam West Batman? He's gonna make Ironman laugh?

I'm thinking Michael Keaton Batman; Robert Downey, Jr., Tony Stark.

Boy, that's a good question. I'm gonna still go with - if it's regular old Batman - I'm going with Ironman. More evasive power, always perpetually has armor, and he can attack from far away. And Batman's only got the batarangs, maybe he uses the car to his advantage at a certain point in time.

I mean, let's be honest. Really this is a corporate war. Both billionaires.

Well put, Jordan. Wayne Industries versus Stark Industries?

Yeah...enterprises? I don't know.

But you're right, who's going to hostilely take over who? That's the real question.

What is your favorite dinosaur and why is it Keanuosaurus Rex?

Shouldn't you be in school, u/Astaghferollah?

Favorite dinosaur...I don't know that the Keanuosaurus places for me.

I don't know that it's even in my Top Ten, the Keanuosaurus.

I would have to say my favorite dinosaur...I'm gonna have to go, Trike. Triceratops.

I am now, and have always been a fan, of the Stegosaurus. I like the little plates on his back.

So, basically we like herbivores.

Low to the ground herbivores.

Hi Keegan! Hi Jordan! I'm incredibly excited for Keanu to come out! I've watched your show for years and get excited to see you guys in cameos all the time!

You've done a lot of promo with this movie, moving from city to city, working with animal shelters due to your co-star being a kitten... Is it more work than your show was? Is this work more rewarding to you?

It's hard to measure. We'll see how rewarding it is when the checks start coming in!

No, it's extremely rewarding to have made a film. We're huge movie fans, as you can tell from our show. We constantly love to move between all the film genres that we adore. The press for a movie is a real whirlwind, and it's a little bit like touring in a band for a couple weeks.

Absolutely, I'd put it that way.

...without the sex.

And the drugs. Well...we may have spoken too soon...

It's rewarding in a different way. I'd say that there are things that have happened on the show that we were trying to achieve a specific goal and we achieved it. That's something that's very fulfilling. Then here, it's the same thing with the cat. So, I'd say that it's apples and oranges. It's equally as rewarding.

It should say something that we left our show to do movies.

What are your favorite pizza toppings? Go.

Watch out for babes.

Actually we want to answer your question. We're not gonna watch out for babes just at this moment, because that would be difficult. That would be multitasking. And women are much better at that than men.

I'm a pepperoni guy.

I'm a ground beef guy. I like ground beef, some onions, and then mushrooms, with a nice sweet sauce.

A mushroom cheeseburger pizza?

Mhm. Pretty close. But no green peppers. I enjoy green peppers, but they overpower the taste of a pizza.

Whoa, who brought up green peppers?

I was just thinking green peppers in my head and how much I enjoy them, but then I realized, I wouldn't want to recommend putting them on a pizza liberally. Because, then you're just eating green peppers with dough. Very overpowering taste, very aggressive.

How many different cats did you use, and did any of them get adopted by either of you?

That's a great question. Seven kittens were used in the film interchangeably. Neither of us adopted any, but of the seven I understand that three of them have been adopted by members of our crew, and then the other four as far as I know now live on the farm where trainers live with all of the other wonderfully intelligent and well cared for stunt animals.

What other shows are you guys watching?

Come back baby come back baby come back come back baby baby.

Doesn't work.

What other shows? I assume you mean besides our own? It's very presumptuous to think...

That we just sit around and watch our own show.

That would be egotistical. I watch exclusively bad reality television.

Jordan has strongly encouraged me to start watching "Naked and Afraid".

Which is good. That's actually not bad. That's the top tier of what I'm puttin' down. Then there's Family Therapy with Dr. Jen. Abysmal programming. Like a fine wine that's been fermenting in it's own...uffff...

It's the champagne of bad reality.

What inspired the creation of Keanu? Also what would you think is a good thought process for writing comedy?

We really wanted to make a movie for us. We didn't pitch this movie. One of the Key & Peele writers, Alex Rubins, and myself wrote this on spec. So, we basically created what was to us the perfect Key & Peele movie and we wrote the whole thing, the first draft, without a kitten in it. And then we realized we needed something to bring us in and bring the heart to the movie, so we came up with this idea of this kitten that wears a do-rag and we put it on the poster and everybody who doesn't know Key & Peele would hopefully have to go see the kitten do-rag movie. Besides that, any movie that we've ever really laughed at is a movie that we've cared about the characters. So, Keanu is a way for the audience to reaaally, reaaally root for our character through the whole arc.

And I would say a thought process for comedy is always think in juxtapositions. You have the most vulnerable, fluffy, cute thing in the world and the majority of our movie takes place on the gritty streets and in a dank, grimy strip club with a bunch of gangsters. So, you're taking kittens and gangsters and mixing them together. Or you're taking nerdy guys who have to pretend they're assassins, guys who've never handled a gun are pretending to be the two greatest assassins in the world. So, you just take opposites and you smash them together and you use juxtapositions to make people giggle. To make people say, "Oh my god that's ridiculous, how's that happening?!" So, if you're writing comedy, to think in that way is always helpful.

Hey guys! Myself and all of my friends are huge fans of yours, and I'm basically here to just express that, but I guess I could think of a question.. Do you pronounce the word vanilla "vah-nil-lah" or "vah-nel-ah"? Please don't let me down here..

Okay, well, first of all it's a short “i” sound, and the diacritical mark in the international alphabet is extremely exact about this; the word should be and is pronounced "van-i-lah", not "van-eh-lah". The thing is, I understand what you mean when you say "van-eh-lah", but I'm gonna leave it at that. I know what "melk" is, I just also know that's also the wrong way to pronounce the word.

People can't be saying "melk."

You can't be saying "melk," people can't be saying "van-eh-la". There's no “e” in the word vanilla.

Y’all can't be talking about, “I have a good ‘idear.’" There's no “r” in that word.

There's no “r” in that word, and also here's another one of my pet peeves, and I know it's gonna make me seem like a snob; it's almond. Almond. And when you're the opposite of how I feel right now, you're calm. You ain't "cawm", and these nuts are not called "awmonds". We don't call it "saalman," ain't nobody call it "saalman".

Rushdie does.

That's true, he does; I stand corrected. I mean to my defense it is spelled s-a-l-m-a-n, that's salman. But if you're talking about fish going upstream jumping into bears’ mouths? S-a-l-m-o-n. Salmon. Come on, y’all.

What's the funniest prank you played on each other?

Not a lot of pranks! We're sorry to say that we've never had a big enough budget to screw around! Never had time to screw around. We just get right down to it.

Was there really nothing?

I mean, maybe sappy dancing with us.

What was that?

Like when we did the aerobics sketch, the sappy dance sketch.

Oh yeah, we had one of our crew members come and dress like the aerobics meltdown characters, and start dancing with us in the middle of the sketch. But you gotta know the guy to know that that made perfect sense.

Yeah, not a lot of practical jokes. The jokes themselves were practical, in as much as that we were taping them.

Maybe the most elaborate was convincing Keegan that we actually had a show that aired on television, and every Wednesday night I would have to go to his house and put a DVD in his television of the stuff that we did.

That means a lot of people had a lot of free time.

Hi K&P, what was your inspiration to make a movie about a cat? I'd like to think it's the amount of redditing you guys do.

Are cats really big on Reddit? Is that a thing? I'm not quite seeing the connection, but, you know like we said, we wanted to...there's a lot of gangsters that have exotic pets; this is a phenomenon. Apparently, there was a guy in the Bronx who had a tiger in his bathroom, and so that was some of the idea we were jumping off of to make Method Man's character Cheddar be a guy that collected a bunch of animals. He also has a snake in the movie. He has a boa constrictor or a python. And then he has Keanu, who is of course the least fierce animal. But, put him in a dew rag and a gold chain, and he's a badass.

And also, not to be too calculating, but the most popular thing on the internet is cats. And cats doing crazy things. So, in a manner of speaking, the movie could be looked at as a two-hour cat video, with even more extraordinary things taking place. So hopefully, that would translate into millions and millions and millions of people coming to see the movie. That's the most commerce-driven answer I could possibly give.

We're totally money driven.

We're talking about little show, big business.