I am comedian, author, public access TV host, and notoriously open book Chris Gethard. AMA.

What up, Chris? I heard you used to live in a place called the Polish Palace. What was the best part about that and the most fucked up part about that place?

BEST PART WAS LIVING WITH MY FRIEND, MY DUDE, A MAN WHO KEPT ME GOING DURING MY TOUGHEST TIMES, THE POET, THE GENIUS, THE RENAISSAINCE MAN, 2014'S DON DRAPER, PHIL JACKSON.

Hi Phil.

The worst part of that place was when that crazy circus artist almost killed me and Hallie by lighting her place on fire. Or maybe the fact that the Polish mafia DEFINITELY kept bodies in that garage we weren't allowed into.

Also, TCGS fans, you now have TCGS poet Phil Jackson's username, I HIGHLY encourage you to dm him with personal questions.

Someone asked if I still keep in contact with the original group of fans of mine, The Gethtards. They deleted it for some reason, but I said:

I still talk to JZT now and then, Fesh, Zoe, Nicole once in a blue moon, and of course Riley and I are super tight. I run into Joanna once in a blue moon. That's it from the original crew of Gethtards. The current crop of fanatics actually insisted on changing their name to the Gethheads because they found Gethtards offensive as a phrase. I am the only comedian on earth whose own fan club changed their name because they themselves were offended by it.

Nerdy fact - Horatio Sanz created the name Gethtards referring to the original crop of Asssscat fans who embraced me as the underdog of the show at UCB NY.

What's the best part about being engaged to Ashanti?

She sang in the shower and it was like a free concert every day.

My copy of your album was shipped to my ex's place. On one hand I never want to talk to him again. That being said, I want my vinyl. How do I approach asking him for it/seeing him without having a panic attack?

Oh no! First of all Kate, good to see you. Also I am so sorry about that! I would email Don Giovanni right now, they haven't shipped yet - we're waiting on these crazy good posters my pal Diana Kolsky designed before we ship em.

The bad news is if it was shipping to your bf's address, I most likely signed the album made out to him. You may have to live in that memory forever any time you listen to my album, but I think my comedy lends itself to eternal sadness anyway?

Do you think Sandy will show up tomorrow?

I hope so. I think she's great and has huge potential for the show.

Whats the best way to pair soda with sandwiches?

For sandwiches, I think you stick to your standard colas, lemon-limes, oranges. Root beers and creams are better on their own, ginger definitely doesn't always hit right with sandwiches, and fruit flavors are to be experimented with over time. The honest answer is you gotta walk your own path, but I'd use the above advice during my early forays into the soda world.

what is your go-to sex move/position?

Go to's are no fun. You gotta be in the moment, my dude/lady.

Generally, I am a submissive fellow, which is probably not surprising if you've seen like even half an episode of TCGS.

It's creepy how much I know about comedians I look up to, but your book does mention that whole herpes scare / being allergic to blue food coloring debacle

YELLOW food coloring.

From the album, these days it sounds like it's eating butt.

Hell yeah.

Chris what were you going to say in Iron Man 3 and do you believe that your absence is what kept the film from being a real hit instead of just the fifth highest grossing movie of all time?

I was supposed to pitch the idea of Iron Patriot to Don Cheadle in Don Draper like fashion. I also got to use those finger swipe computer things they have people use in those movies.

Definitely I could have made it the top grossing movie of all time.

What does "lose well" mean?

Lose Well means to fail hard and understand that failing is preferable to not trying. That it's ok to be a loser as long as you do it full tilt and with integrity.

My order of preference for the results of creative projects is -

1. Succeed wildly
2. Fail in a beautiful explosion of a train wreck
3. Do something that's "ok"

Geth!

I’m getting caught up on TCGS now and loving it, thanks for keeping them on Youtube.

I found the show through your appearance on You Made it Weird with Pete Holmes and really loved that episode. Considering it sounds like you’ve had meetings with other producers/channels over the years, what’s the best part about having ended up at Comedy Central?

My Grandfather was a medic in WWII. He was partnered up with another medic, and one day they were talking about their past and how they ended up where they were. His partner told him that in basic training they asked what his occupation was, and he said “I’m a driver for Dr. Brown’s.” Assuming he must have some medical knowledge, they made him a medic in the war. That’s not a question, just thought you would get a kick out of a soda story.

Comedy Central has been so awesome to us at TCGS. They really let us do things our way, which was something I think all our fans feared - I think our fans wanted to see us do well and make this our jobs but were scared a corporate entity would ruin the show itself. Comedy Central, very much to their credit, said their biggest hesitation in purchasing our pilot was that they DIDN'T want to ruin it. It was super rad to hear.

I think they do amazing stuff right now too. Nathan For You, Inside Amy Schumer, Kroll Show, so much other great stuff going on. I'd love to be a part of it, and fingers crossed they give our little oddball a chance to show the world what we can do. I think we'll really surprise some people if they give us the chance!

Sadly, I knew how your story ended before the ending. Dr. Brown's is the best. Their black cherry is obviously no joke, and if you can handle the syrup-y side of it, Cel-Rey is one of the oddest and coolest sodas going in.

Thanks for supporting TCGS. Also, Pete Holmes is scared to fight me.

Black Cherry is my favorite soda! Love a Cel-Rey too, grosses out everyone I know.

Finding someone else who loves Cel-Rey soda? I'm proud to call you my soulmate.

It is delicious, but an acquired taste.

I'll piggyback the youtube comment. Really appreciate you having it on there. Loving all of them, too! Keep doing what you're doing.

We do our best! Thank you so much for supporting us.

I want you to know that I am currently at work at staples, and might get in trouble for posting this..

anywho

If you could have anything on a waffle (prefferably from waffle house) without anyone judging you, what would you have?

Waffles make me sneeze. This is not a joke!

DON'T GET FIRED FROM STAPLES FOR THIS!

First off, you were the last person I'd expect to be into eating butt. Also because of going to TCGS and Lincoln Park after, my work now expects me to be late to work every Thursday morning.

• Is there any person (celebrity or otherwise) that you were surprised to learn they were a fan of TCGS? Such as people outside the age demographic of the show or celebrities that aren't comedians?

• You have a lot of outspoken fans, has there been any interactions with them that have been too weird or uncomfortable for you?

Thanks and see you at Knitting Factory tonight and TCGS tomorrow.

Really? I am the first person I would expect to be into eating butt. Now that I'm a butt eater, at least. In the past, I was like you, but now am enlightened to the ways of the butt eating world.

Sorry we make you so late to work! Actually, I'm not. Work sucks. Fuck work.

Anytime someone is a fan of the show, I'm surprised. The people who surprise me the most tend to be the New Yorkers who see it on public access. The people who seek it out tend to be oddballs and artists and young people and those you would expect. Sometimes I'll just be walking down the street in NYC though and people will just be like "Yo Chris, whattup?" and sometimes they're housewives or UPS guys or whatever, and it always makes me realize that public access really is an institution in NYC.

I do often have uncomfortable interactions with fans, though I think my limits are stretched far beyond most entertainers. I have a good sense of when things are too intense or inappropriate by now and try to just avoid the ones that make me uncomfortable. There was a stretch there where people felt like they had 110% access to me and it got scary a bit. Now I give like 80% access and will sometimes take a weekend to just enjoy my own life and chill with Hallie and not worry about other peoples' problems for a bit. BUT - the main thing is, I love any fan and really do think 99.9% of people and interactions are super fun and inspiring.

As a huge fan of The Best Show on WFMU with Tom Scharpling, it was disappointing to find out that your project with him did not work out. Do you have any other plans to work with Tom Scharpling in the future?

No immediate plans, but I would literally take a bullet for Tom Scharpling. Anything I ever got to work on with him, I would in a heartbeat.

Dear Chris,

Please make replica Human Fish swim trunks available. I will buy 50.

-Random Noah

Ha. Amazing idea. Also, haven't seen you in a while! How have you been?

What would it take for your character on Broad City to fire Ilana? It's like she's almost actively asking to be fired

Well, considering Ilana writes the show, my guess is it would take a lot.

What was your favorite bar when you were a student at Rutgers?

Ale and Wich, all day. I'm a punk despite the J Crew, gimme some credit.

Hardest part about being a comedian?

It is a grind where if you aren't working as hard as possible, someone else is working harder than you. So if you aren't hustling to the best of your abilities at all times, you're gonna slip. So you can't really rest. You have to be writing, promoting, looking for new opportunities at all times. Then you just gotta pray you make enough to get health insurance.

BUT it's as fun as I can imagine a job being. As long as you're ok with being stressed and poor.

What is Horatio's username on Reddit dot com?

I have no idea. That's a great question. Horatio is one of my all time best friends, but once he moved to LA I haven't heard from him too much. That's how it works as a NY comedian these days - when people move to LA it's like when Frodo took that boat to that heaven-ish place. I remain behind, like Samwise or whatever.

You act in scripted stuff, do stand up, and have taught improv- so what is your favorite form of comedy? what is similar about all these forms? what is different?

Right now I love stand up more than anything. Historically, improv is my jam. Scripted stuff is cool, but I love the immediacy of being in front of a crowd more than anything else. It's a huge adrenaline rush.

I think all forms of comedy are basically containers, and your voice is the material that you pour into them. A bowl isn't shaped like a cup, but you can pour water into both, if that makes sense. Your voice is what's at the core of your comedy - stand up, improv, sketch writing, essay writing - it's your voice that's the engine of the machine. That's what they have in common.

Stand up is the most difficult and the loneliest. But it's the biggest feeling of triumph when it goes well. Improv is the most fun when it goes well, because it exceeds the sum of its parts and goes places no one could have controlled.

Follow up- You have stated you like calling it TCGS because it sort of just makes you a part in this show. Why not change the name completely, to, I don't know, Vacation Jason and Friends show? Seems like that name has a real star quality to it.

This comment is infuriating.

What was the IFC pilot? Like was it a story from your book (which is one of just three I brought with me to college) or something else in that vein? Also....Tom Scharpling seems like he'd be the coolest to hang out with. Was he? Any story come to mind?

The IFC pilot was based on three stories from my life, two of them directly from the book. I would have played myself at every age, and each episode would have been themed and then looked at three stories from different eras of my life that dealt with that theme in different ways. It would have been RAD. I was super bummed that they didn't go with it.

Scharpling IS the coolest, and he is also INSPIRING. That guy does things the RIGHT WAY. He is a man of integrity and a reminder that you can do things YOUR WAY and feel good about it.

He is like a zen master when it comes to writing comedy. We met in the places where the stories took place to write. So we would go to like, the Princeton University student center. And I'd be all nervous about deadlines, and he'd be talking about basketball for like an hour, then he'd be like "We should change this joke in act one, and remove this line from act three" and I'd be like "YO THIS IS RAD." Taught me a lot!

When was the last time you heard from Walter (your only fan)?

He came to the studio the last episode before the pilot taping. It was GREAT to see him!

I heard you have an enormous penis. True or false?

Also, after I taped my Comedy Central half hour, the director told me my pants were too tight and you could distinctly see the outline of my penis through my pants. So you can decide for yourself when it airs in a few months.

Every rumor you've heard about me is true.

What's your favorite subreddit?

/r/soda or if I'm being honest, /r/gonewild during those necessary moments.

Hey Chris! I only have one question, but I can't overemphasize how important this question is. In some sense, it could be considered the quintessential question.

You go into Duane Reade with $20 and you have to spend it all...what do you buy?

I buy lots and lots of Neutrogena Pink Grapefruit face wash. EXCLUSIVE. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST.

When are we going to finally see a production(live or filmed) of "Time Phone"?

Time Phone is a funny joke, but it will never see the light of day. We couldn't even make it happen one night in an ATM booth. I'd love to bring it back theoretically for the joke, but that would also involve reliving the details of one of the most intense and terrifying manic episodes I've ever had, so it will probably just remain a strange reference for you and I to get.

Hey Chris. Who's your all-time favorite comic book character?

Multiple Man! I cried when he died.

Chris, saw you in Minneapolis a few weeks ago and it was absolutely incredible, got me writing jokes again for the first time in years. Two questions:

What's your favorite spot in the Twin Cities? Any advice for someone who's written pages and pages of jokes, but never quite taken the leap to the stage from stage-fright?

Thanks for coming! Minneapolis was RAD! Acme is a fantastic club and I was blown away by the people who ran it and the crowds who came to it. Such an honor to perform there.

The ONLY way to get good at stand up is to get up and do it. You WILL eat shit, and all your stage fright fears WILL come true. BUT you will find that they aren't as scary as you think - and that they get less scary each time you run into them. I bombed last week while taping a set to submit for an audition for the Tonight Show. You never stop bombing. Even material you know works will occasionally bomb. You just gotta own it and make it part of your skill set. As a performer, failing is actually a more useful skill to master than succeeding is. Everyone succeeds and everyone fails. Succeeding is easy. Failing is hard. Get good at the hard thing. Good luck!

What's your favorite track on your album?

Man, tough question, Millie. Leave it to Millie to really put the screws to me.

Probably the Bonnaroo story because it was a tough stretch and I really came out ok. The Alan Rickman story kind of folds into that same stretch of life so I think they are kind of companion stories that still sort of spin my head but that I am glad I emerged unscathed from.

Do you believe in aliens?

I don't know that I believe in them, but I wouldn't be surprised by them.

Gethard, I got into your show as of late last year and as of January this year, I finally finished up all the episodes and I absolutely think it's one of the greatest things that humanity has offered us thus far in terms of entertainment.

Coupla questions:

• What would you say the scariest bit you guys have ever done on the show? Human crane excluded.

• If you could have one band and one celebrity guest on the show, what would be your ideal candidates?

• Any word on whether Random Sandy will be back this week? I understand that she's been controversial among much of the fan base but I found her to be very charming and an excellent addition to the cast.

The scariest bit was actually the Human Sundae at this year's SXSW. We thought the ice cream would melt and I'd be in a gross soup. Instead it stayed rock hard and frozen on my skin. Halfway through the show I realized I was in trouble when I tried to flick ice cream off the back of my hand and it was frozen onto me like that kid's tongue on the flag pole in A Christmas Story. I quietly asked Bethany to massage feeling back into my hands and continued hosting the show. I wound up with burns all over my thighs and arms in a circle surrounding my genitals, since I was protecting them with my hands. Also, I had burns on my elbow so bad that there were huge blisters. Such a dumb bit, but I think a fun show!

I'd love to have Jawbreaker reunite on the show. I know they don't want the pressure or to give in to the money demands, but the sound on our show is unreliable anyway and we can offer them no money. That would mean the world to me.

As far as celebrities go, I'm not sure! Howard Stern or David Letterman? They were my early inspirations. Andy Kaufman if he's still alive, I think my show would be the perfect place to come back.

I hope Sandy comes back, I think she can add so much to our show. If our fans chased her away, I think it's sad - it's like the bullying we claim to reject as a show infected our own airwaves. Bums me out.

Big fan of TCGS here! Two questions: 1) Who is your favourite frequently returning audience member at TCGS? 2) Can I buy you a beer when you come to Toronto in 2 weeks?

I mean, I love all the regular fans! Really loving Tracksuit Liarhater the past two episodes. Have to give a huge shootout to Julia and Jamie, because no one has supported me more than those two.

I don't drink booze, but we can get sodas!

Would you ever do a live TCGS show in LA, and what I can do to make that a reality?

• Quinn from CA

Hell yeah! We were out there a few years ago as part of our RV trip we did when it was a stage show. UCB LA is our sister theater and maybe we'll come back someday. The hard part with TCGS on the road is that there's so many of us. Like 10-15 performers minimum, ya know? Wouldn't want to advertise TCGS in LA and not have the Human Fish. Or Vacation Jason. Or The Hintmaster. Maybe even 40 Year Old Goosey?

Of all the embarrassing things you've admitted on TCGS, in your book and on stage, what was the thing you admitted that got the most fan support that you wouldn't have expected?

This butt eating thing seems to be taking off like wildfire.

Thank you for also being an awkward dude from NJ. What is your fondest and what is your worst NJ memory?

Worst NJ memory was getting in a car crash in Clifton in an exhausted haze and realizing I didn't stop it from happening when I could have. One of my worst moments of depression and self-harm. Also was saved from being beaten up by a dude only because a racist saw the incident and didn't want an African-American dude beating up a white kid. Surreal and fucked up and awful.

SO MANY good Jersey memories though. Most of them involve driving around dropping off boxes for Weird NJ. Mostly driving on that stretch down near Sandy Hook where you got the ocean on one side and the bay on the other. That's the most peaceful place I know.

What soda would you recommend to a soda noob looking to have a mind-blowing soda experience?

Fentiman's Cherry Tree Cola or Sprecher's Cream are a great place to start. They're familiar enough but you'll taste the difference in quality.

Mr Q Cumber if you want to dive in deep and really blow your mind.

How do you think JR smith would feel about TCGS? Also, who is your pick for the next Knicks coach?

I think JR Smith would love that shit. It's totally chaotic and there's lots of young girls that hang out. He would be the KING.

BRING BACK VAN GUNDY!

What's the weirdest, happiest, most memorable thing that's ever happened to you at a Del Close Marathon? Feel free to answer this question in one part or in three.

Thanks!

I got to witness Shannon O'Neill in Substance Abuse in 2002. Most brilliant thing I've ever seen happen on a stage.

I've been catching up with the show over the past couple of months, and I know there's a lot of anxiety over if whether or not it'll get picked up. But, if anything, this show has got to be the comedy equivalent of The Sex Pistols playing Free Trade Hall. So many people are going to be citing this thing as an influence in the next decade or two. I'm positive about that.

Also I'm going to the show for the first time tomorrow and I'm bringing a friend who has never seen it before. I'll be the guy in the pizza costume.

Also what are some favorite movies of yours?

Grosse Point Blank is the best comedy and probably most underrated movie I know.

THANKS for saying that about TCGS. I've thought that for a while - if the worst that happens is we encouraged some other people to make stuff better than TCGS, then TCGS will be well worth it.

Hey Chris. I'd like you to know I'm in my school library right now NOT writing the last page of my essay due in less than one hour because fuck school lose well go tcgs and all that.

I have some questions about musical guests once Comedy Central picks up the show:

How is the musical guest gonna change compared to public access? How many songs did Shellshag play at the pilot? Is it still 2 or was it shortened to 1? I assume you're still gonna champion the quirky and fun local bands but any plan to get some big names if Comedy Central comes through? Bouncing Souls...? Andrew Jackson Jihad perhaps?

Edit: And of course, thanks for everything you've done for comedy and non-comedy. I've read your essay on depression so so many times. But I've left enough too-personal messages through facebook/forums so I don't wanna bog down the AMA with all that

We have no idea how the musical guests will change, in that we may not have musical guests due to time stuff. But I am gonna fight for it if we are blessed enough to get to that conversation!

Shellshag played one song that would have played out during the last portion of the show, with the idea being you could then go to our website to get exclusive content of 4-5 songs they played in the studio with the corresponding huge dance party we threw down and held in that studio.

I'd love Andrew Jackson Jihad!

I'm all for big names, but in all honestly I would MUCH rather continue to support local artists and artists at a level that I think are underground and cool and could use the support. No offense to the bigger shows than us, but I'd much rather support underground DIY artists then start booking things through publicists.

I'm glad I was able to help with that essay and stuff - hard day of life but I'm glad it did some good.

I don't have a question but I just thought I'd let you know that my friend Maelle got me into your show after her appearance in the culture show episode. I've been hooked ever since and it's turned me onto a lot of other great people I wouldn't otherwise have known because I'm in the UK. So thanks and best of luck with the pilot - I'm rooting for your pickup!

Wow! That's rad. We weirdly have a bunch of UK fans which is an honor, since I think you guys have good taste.

Hey Chris! Huge fan ever since I found your book!

I've been seeing you all over lately, your show, your new album, your book: Are there any creative projects/mediums that you're hoping to get off the ground?

I kinda want to write a movie, but that seems expensive to get made. I have a good idea though. I don't know. I also wouldn't mind something being easy in the future.

As someone in the public access world, you meet many unusual and unstable people. As someone who has psychological issues and incorporates that into your act, these unstable people probably scare you sometimes too. Without having to name any names, who is the scariest person you have met in the public access world?

There is an insane guy who during the election special actually wound up hosting the show for about half an hour. He is pretty out there. Good dude, though.

If you could pick one member of the Wu-Tang Clan to hang out with all day, who would it be? Or any rapper for that matter?

P.S. do you guys need any accounting help? I'd love to be involved with your show but that is all I can offer

If I could hang out with any rapper for a day it would be Kool Keith.

We don't need accounting since we only lose money.

When did you first meet Amy Poehler? What did she mean to you and how was it to have her as a guest on your show years later?

I first met Amy, strangely enough, when I hosted a night at UCB where different comedians legitimately boxed each other.

A few years later I started getting invited to do Asssscat at UCB - my first two years only on Super Bowl Sunday and Oscar Night. Amy was super supportive and made it feel easy to be on stage with her despite her huge talent.

She's been really encouraging to me for years now and it means the world. She is ten times more badass and inspiring than you already think she is. She is the best.

Is Greggulator's heel turn permanent, or is it constantly in flux?

ALWAYS in flux. He's an unpredictable master of emotions. All beware Faberge Gregg.

Hey Chris first off I just want to say thank you for being so brutally honest about your struggles with mental health and getting medicated. You personally inspired me to get help after struggling for almost 10 years by myself. Also I wanna say that you're my straight up hero just by the virtue of being a guy from North Jersey who does his own thing and refuses to shut the fuck up and that's literally how you make things happen. It's really amazing to see someone succeed with nothing but relentless hard work and brute force charisma. You've taught me alot about the world just by living that way.

Anyway, you gotta tell me - when you got into that police chase on 287 north - as related in your excellent book A Bad Idea I'm About To Do - which exit was it that you got off and managed to first evade the cop? Was it Bernardsville? I am like 75% sure it was Bernardsville, I literally used to drive that exit every single day of my life.

Okay well thanks. Psyched to see you tonight and at the Shea Stadium show on Sunday!

Bernardsville, indeed. Home of The Devil's Tree!

Jersey all day. Always glad to hear there are more stubborn Jersey kids out there with chips on their shoulders who don't wanna do things how they tell us we're supposed to.

Do you feel like having a lot of experience in improv has helped you at all with TCGS?

P.S. I think you are a supremely inspiring person.

Oh yeah, TCGS is pretty much an improv show. We never plan more than like 60% of the show.

Thank you! I am glad to have inspired you and promise that you inspire me as well.

Are you still engaged to Ashanti?

Nah, I left her for Hallie. She's way cooler.

Chris! You have been there for UCB's growth over the years. Do you have any advice to folks who are starting up their own improv theater with their friends?

The only reason to do it is to explore the art form and further the craft. Don't chase brass rings, jobs, reputation, or success. Build a theater on a foundation of integrity and make sure it's an environment where everyone can challenge each other. And LET PEOPLE FAIL. That's why UCB was so huge for me - no other theater on earth would have let a 20 year old kid with low self-esteem do such bad shows on their stage for so many years while figuring it out.

Look out, you're doing an AMA on the same day as a researcher from NASA. Tooough competition!

My questions come not from someone who watches your show (I'm sure it's lovely) but from someone who LIVES with someone who watches your show. My sibling/roommate (same singular person, sorry for the confusion) never shuts up about this fandangled Tee Sea Gee Ess thing, and I never know what she's talking about.

Who is this Mimi person and why is she constantly hooping? Are there really live fish-human hybrids in your studio? What is the significance of this supposedly large banana you regularly feature? What exactly... what exactly do people do on your show?

YO FUCK NASA.

Dude, your roommates sound like smart people with good taste.

I can't explain any of it. You gotta watch. Join the cult, Soycrates, join the cult.

Are you writing any new stuff like A Bad Idea or those Vice pieces?

How long is TCGS gunna run on MNN now that it's back?

Why won't you sign my alf poster as alf?

What are you so afraid of?

Been focusing on the album but am going to be writing a ton more moving forward.

We aren't sure when we're ending the MNN run!

I AM NOT ALF.

I am afraid of literally almost everything.

Sometimes with TCGS it feels like any sort of weirdness is possible. Has there ever been an idea for a bit or a theme that was too far for you or the panel to be willing to go for? What was it?

Oh yeah. JD keeps pitching "Which religion is best?" Where we'd book a priest and a rabbi and people from all religions and have them fight. Not my thing!

To his credit, I pitched an episode where I would actually be crucified and no one else was into it.

Hey Chris,

Have you ever actually cried at a WaWa? If so...was it because your computer generated sandwich didn't come out correcty?

I haven't actually cried in a WaWa, that was my pal Mal's life specific. I DID once catch a terrifying virus that hit me full on while standing in a WaWa, and I almost passed out. I drove home on the NJ Turnpike with a 104 degree fever, and then didn't have a bowel movement for like six days. That's the closest I ever came to crying in a Wawa.

Damn...that sucks. Follow up question. What is the best advice you received when you were just starting out in comedy?

It wasn't quite when I started out, but seven years in my shrink told me "Give yourself no other option" and had me quit anything I did that wasn't comedy related. I had to go out there and either make my rent or give up the dream. Sounds harsh, but it worked. Of course, that was when I'd been working seven years and needed to dive in fully instead of straddling the fence between "real" jobs and comedy.

Hey Chris! Not a question, but I just wanted to say that after finding your once small show, you influenced my life in the biggest way and I can honestly say I wouldn't be where I am today without the beautiful weirdness that is TCGS. I had a hard time understanding my saddness and moving forward after some hard moments in my life. When I found TCGS at the beginning, I grew as the show grew and am a much better person today because of it. Thanks so much for having me on for my birthday, it will always be the best day of my entire life and I would like to apologize to my future husband/children in advance for that! Congrats on all of the success!!!

Please, it was so rad having you on! I was so touched that your sister organized it, and I hope you'll come back and join us again soon!

Dear Chris Geth Hard (as The Ghost of Macho Man Randy Savage would say),

Huuuge fan of TCGS!

Do you feel as The Chris Gethard Show has gone on that it has become more difficult for new viewer to get into it because of the in jokes/characters? I personally do not feel this was a barrier for entry to me but I wanted to see your thoughts on this.

Cheers and love. Richard

Yeah I definitely think it takes a few episodes to lock in. We try to be mindful of it, but it is a dense show!

Also, THANK YOU for doing the torrents of the show. Super cool of you.

Are you prepared to answer any question?

This seems ominous. I mean, most questions, right? I can't imagine being asked about something worse than the things I talk about on TCGS and the internet on a regular basis. Nothing that would hurt my family or fiancee, but otherwise I'm pretty good to go.

Chris,

I love you dude! Keep making stuff and being fantastic. You inspire me because I'm a young person who wants to make stuff. I go to a weird, small college that doesn't have a lot of people who want to make stuff. I'm doing open mics and I started my own homemade comedy zine with a couple of friends. It's kind of like an George Meyer Army Man-type thing. Anyway, I think your show is fantastic and I believe in you hardcore.

Have a great day.

I love you too!

Your stuff sounds rad. Can you send me a copy of the zine?

In your Splitsider interview you talking about how you put some stuff, like improv, on hold in order to focus on really streamlining your stand-up material. How do you feel now that you have put out your first album and have an actual physical manifestation of all your hard work?

Is there a void in your life now that a creative and professional goal has been accomplished? Does it make you want to set your sights on a new goal and push further and harder?

(No reason, asking for a friend.)

I feel really good!

There is always a void that happens after a project comes into fruition. But I have learned over time that you gotta keep pushing and grinding, because the accomplishments aren't as fulfilling as the chase anyway.

Good luck to your FRIEND.

Chris, you're a Rutgers guy. You also love sandwiches. What's your favorite sandwich place in Jersey?

Jimmy Buff's if hot dogs count, and I can't not say GREASE TRUCKS

Was this video as uncomfortable to make as it was to watch?
Also, has anyone called you Whitey McTalentless since then?

I don't even have to click the link to know what video you're referencing. It was actually a cool experience, and I give Travis a lot of credit for making it. Truly overwhelming, but in an artsy fartsy way I'm as proud of it as anything else I've done.

Why are you so awesome?

I'm not. Just a kid from New Jersey who refuses to quiet down.

Do you balance working a day job with comedy stuff (or have you ever?). How much sleep did you get when you were working, performing and doing MMA?

I barely slept from the years of 1998-2007. I have been lucky to not need a day job for the past eight years or so, I just grind it out doing comedy and acting and writing. But I'm a lucky one that way and I don't take it lightly.

Hey Gethard, I love TCGS, was just there for JD's nightmare. I grew up in central NJ not too far from West Orange, and loved the jersey references on the new album. I got super excited when I saw a track titled "Crying at the Wawa" as a fellow depressed kid from Jersey. The first time I listened to it I smiled to whole time at the nostalgia, but then I played it again right after and I swear to god, you made me cry like a little girl you asshole. Keep doing what you do, it makes a lotta people happy, and some to cry alone in their room after listening to a goddamn comedy album.

Crying's cool.

Thank you for the kind words! Feel better.

Will Bluejay ever return to the Sidecar?

I hope so, I like the mask.

Dr. Gethard! Back in 05/06 I used to go to Asssscat at the UCB Theater every Sunday– for the late show, naturally.

My friends and I would always pray that you were the monologist– you always told the most insane stories about growing up in Jersey and your family.

Unfortunately, I can not remember any story in particular, just various tales of fistfights, crying when you fight, and the like.

What was your favorite story you used as a monologue at UCB? And if you can remember, what story birthed the best improv routines?

Thanks!

I have as much memory for those stories as you do. That stretch of doing monologues was career defining and overwhelming. I do remember telling one about an incident on a bus where Amy said "It's the closest I've ever come to blacking out the show after the monologue", which was a huge honor. Any compliment is an honor coming from her. I actually just started reworking that story into a new stand up routine.

I just bought your album and I've been listening to it all morning. How come you still won't approve my facebook friend request? It's been pending for like 2 years.

I already have 5,000 friends, mi amigo. I am sorry! I wish they'd let me approve more.

I helped out on two TCGS episodes - Conspiracy Theory Gary, and Shaving the Human Fish and you and your crew inspired me to submit a public access show to MNN just last week! I wanted to thank you for being a role model to me. Also, when you submitted TCGS, how long did it take for MNN to get back to you?

THANK YOU for helping us. MNN aren't the best communicators all the time but they're a kick ass organization and if you keep rattling the chains they'll take good care of ya! What's your show gonna be called?

What is your favorite city that starts with "J"?

Jackson, NJ. Home of Six Flags Great Adventure.

Can you describe your favorite or most memorable improv show or scene that you were a part of? If you have one that is.

Probably this show the Stepfathers did where we played a Chinese dragon that got lost during the Chinese new year parade and wound up going on an adventure in the Appalachian foothills.

who was the biggest scumbag at your high school and what would you do if you saw that person today?

There were too many scumbags to count at West Orange High. That's how we rolled.

Hi Chris!

I just started watching your show last week, and i'm already hooked, have watched 20 or 30 episodes and absolutely can't stop, going to my first taping tomorrow night! Did you ever envision the show turning out the way it did or lasting for as long as it has? What was your original vision for the show? It definitely seem like it took on a weird life of its own from the beginning.

Also, more of a suggestion than a question, but you guys should do another Bonnaroo roadtrip!

I absolutely didn't picture the show being this interactive, community driven beast. I'm happy it is so different from my vision though, my vision was shitty and full of ego.

That bonnaroo road trip was too dangerous.

My husband, Kris, is a diabetic but loves trying new sodas. What are your favorite diet pops? He's especially fond of root beers.

I'm sorry to tell you there's no such thing as a good diet soda.

Hi Chris I love everything you've done since Big Lake! Will we ever get another Night of Zero Laughs?

YES! JD says he has some ideas on how to do the next one bigger and better.

I've been introducing my friends to TCGS slowly but surely; one jumped in with "Scare the Shit out of Bethany" and "The Cream Wedding" without telling me, and he still came to see your Comedy Central half-hour taping with me, so I guess that's a good sign! I was just wondering what happened to the first 40 or so episodes on iTunes? I know they're up on YouTube, but I just noticed that a bunch were gone from iTunes and thought it was really weird.

Also, have you calmed down a little about your pants being a little too tight during the taping?

I have no idea why they aren't on iTunes! I am not a technical minded guy.

I will calm down when I see the footage and know I wasn't displaying a boner to the world.

MFK Murf, Anderson Cooper, and P Diddy

Marry Diddy, that guy was pure magic. Fuck Murf because jeez, what a man. I like Anderson Cooper but sadly he must die.

Hey! A Chris Gethard AMA, awesome!

With the show constantly changing ideas/themes/formats each week, do you have any particular favorite type of episode? (e.g. call in topic shows vs. world-building shows vs. epic robot battle shows?)

I really love the ones where people trigger the action via the phones or internet. That to me is the show at its best - we set it up, then you get to call in and knock it down.

That being said, it's been too long since we've done a robot battle or time travel super elaborate show and I LOVE those too.

What's the scariest thing you've ever seen JD Amato do?

Dude… one day we were playing basketball and he had a bad reaction to some medication and it was like looking into the eyes of a demon. Truly scary.

What's the best improv advice you've ever gotten?

"Chris, improv works better if you give other people a turn once in a while." - Armando Diaz, to me, in my UCB level 3 class

Hi, Chris! I saw you for both nights when you came down to Chicago for the Just for Laughs Festival and I've been a fan ever since. Here's my question:

Do you think there's a chance you could take over Colbert's old spot once he moves to CBS? If you did, how do you think the format of the show would change (if at all)?

I don't think we'll be taking over Colbert's slot any time soon.

Huge fan, thanks for doing the AMA!!

What are your favorite books?

What are your favorite podcasts?

Who are your favorite comedians?

Who inspired you as a young kid or inspires you now?

Thanks again!!

Book: To Kill A Mockingbird Podcasts: This American Life and Radiolab Comedians: All time, Andy Kaufman - Current: Mike Birbiglia, John Mulaney, Hannibal Buress, Michael Che, Eugene Mirman, and SO MANY MORE