You can obviously ask anything you want and I will try not to be a douchey actor and request that you 'stick to the project.' I am realistic enough to realize that talking about fingers in my rump is much more interesting than my 'creative process.' Redditors, get a FREE trial of EPIX:


Comments: 1555 • Responses: 100  • Date: 

i_saw_nothing576 karma

Hi Mr. Norton.

I just thought you should know that any time someone uses the word "chip" in casual conversation, I find myself unable to resist muttering "what's that?" under my breath, which then causes them to stop what they're saying and ask me what I just said. It's a total emergency break applied to a natural conversation.

You've ruined any discussions about poker and potato-based snacks, Jim.

Thanks for nothing.

RealJimNorton406 karma

hahaha thank you man!! that makes it worth it

ckb614530 karma

Do you remember posing for this picture?

RealJimNorton619 karma


Throwaway_3769436 karma

Hi, I just wanted to thank you for saving my marriage. I've been a fan since I saw you on Tough Crowd and started listening to O&A a few years later.

A few years ago, while I was pregnant, my husband cheated on me during the "rock bottom" stage of his alcoholism. I found out when our kid was 3 weeks old. It took all I had to even listen to his pleas for forgiveness and understanding, but rather than grant it I kicked him to detox to get his shit together while I figured out if I cared whether he got better.

Once I let him come home, it was still a long horrible road to some kind of normalcy, during which time my stupid brain cycled through "what was wrong with me? Am I ugly? Did I get too fat? Is he going to do this again? Can he be a decent human being?" nonstop.

But during my hour long commute, i would listen to the show and your insight into the brains of men, an addict, and a fuckup really helped me step outside my own situation and heal. It wasn't easy, in fact it was the hardest thing I've ever done, but if not for you guys (and Patrice) dissecting the Tiger Woods scandal, i probably would have had a much harder time getting past the infidelity.

He's been sober over 4 years now and while we both annoy the fuck out of each other, we're a lot more honest with each other and ourselves about who we are and what we want/need.

You have really helped me embrace who he is, even with the bullshit. People are a lot more than their mistakes and weaknesses, and had i not figured that out, I would be single, (more) uptight, and probably lonely. Instead I'm happy, have the best sex of my life, and my kid has a functional father at home.

Did you ever imagine you'd be such a hero of the family unit?

RealJimNorton430 karma

Thank you very much. I'm normally just the person they blame for their husband's cheating, so that was nice to read

RealJimNorton330 karma

I've been it at it for 2 hours now, so I'm going to stop because I have literally had to take a shit for 90 minutes. And my hands hurt. I am NOT AVOIDING ANY QUESTIONS. So I don't want any paranoid poster thinking I avoided you. I didn't. I really appreciate you asking me shit, I always try to be honest. I hope you like my special tonight if you're so inclined .

mafoo227 karma

When was the last time you were truly, genuinely embarrassed?

RealJimNorton493 karma

when i spoke like an irishman to ozzy and ant pointed it out. It was fucking humiliating. but I got a great bit out of it, so it doesnt hurt at all anymore.

sardofil176 karma

I want to thank you for informing the world about DeRosa's terrible tattoo and his lust for cock.

What would it take to get you to suck Bailey Jay's pretty cock? Just some good nipple twerking and ass eating or something more?

RealJimNorton384 karma

What would it take? Bailey Jay to say yes. She's an amazing gal and sucking her cock is the only option for any red blooded American.

DubmyRUCA127 karma

Hey Jim, over at The Opie and Anthony subreddit where all us fans gather to BS about the show, we collected a set of questions we wanted to see answered the most. You’re very open on the show so it was hard to come up with questions but If you could chip in answers for at least a few of them that’d be great!

  1. What does “laughter” mean to you?

  2. On a show a while ago you mentioned how twitter hate doesn't affect you but one guy said something so bad it convinced you that you needed to lose weight, you said you wouldn't tell us what he said till you did lose some pounds. Well skinny boy what did he say?

  3. How often do you go home with groupies/fans after your standup shows?

  4. Can you show examples of how Chip, Uncle Paul and Edgar text/write?

  5. What is the most deplorable sex act that you have committed?

  6. Why the fascination with hats? (this has been answered)

  7. Where do your characters come from? Are they influenced by tv/movies etc or does it just come to you?

  8. How is it that, even though you lost all that weight, you still don’t have a jawline?

RealJimNorton328 karma

most deplorable sex act? Probably continuing to fuck a woman's ass after she'd shit on my dick. That was a rough day at work

RealJimNorton229 karma

chinlessness is an old Norton trait. none of us have chins. We are half Irish, Half pelican mongrels.

RealJimNorton203 karma

I very rarely go home with groupies, if ever. My act is brutal, not really sexy. I talk about tranny's and having fingers pile driven into my asshole during a massage; most girls don't moisten up when they see that.

RealJimNorton183 karma

Laughter for me is the feeling most people get when they cum against the ass of a stranger on the subway. ie, amazing and you crave it over and over

RealJimNorton182 karma

tss whatevah COCKSUCKA tsss. sHeT uP anD doo YOre DooTy. chip and edgar

RealJimNorton101 karma

I honestly dont remember what the guy said. Twitter has some valid criticisms too, just because I annoy someone doesnt mean theyre wrong. it's when they're cunty for no reason that I lose interest

VeritablyClean122 karma

Why the fascination with hats?

When you were a boy, you were voted most likely to _____

What is the process of creating a character?

RealJimNorton324 karma

I love talking about hats because they're awful. I was voted for boy most likely to be a fat-titted hanging victim. And my characters all come from my personal life, I use them to annoy women I'm dating. Once they hate a character, it's ready for the radio.

HomeRunChipperson121 karma

I know you've addressed it on air and Rogan, but since this is ground zero, can you explain your opinion and the perspective/backstory of the Homeless Cake Stomp that Reddit united to hate Opie for last week?

I saw a lot of people trying to get you guys fired for that, did you catch flack from Sirius or are you guys pretty much untouchable these days?

If anyone can turn the anti-O&A Reddit storm around it's you.

RealJimNorton182 karma

We caught zero flack from the company. It's too long to give a good written explanation, but that tape didn't show the relationship we had with Andrew. The tone of our relationship with him was very fun before and after that. We genuinely liked and cared about him. And I couldn't care less about the firestorm of criticism because I was standing there and know the way we all felt about it when it happened, I know how we treated Andrew. The goal of Op doing that wasn't for a second to belittle or humiliate a homeless guy. It was dickish in the way you do something stupid to a guy you know to make everyone laugh. And for fuck's sake, how often does a person have a cake placed AT THEIR FEET? hard to resist

Slippery_Slope_Guy109 karma

Would you ever do a whole set as Chip?

RealJimNorton236 karma

I'm lucky i can do three minutes without glasses being thrown at me

poopstainmcgoo91 karma

How difficult was it this morning to try & speak without David Lee Roth barreling over the conversation?

RealJimNorton135 karma

I love Dave, he's just a silly chatty goose. I didnt mind because he's having fun, he's just forging ahead. I requested him for today

Commodore_Schmidlapp85 karma

Mr. Norton,

Your previous two books were both a proverbial hoot and holler (respectively). Any plans for a third?

RealJimNorton91 karma

yes, but i have to be motivated as to what I'd want to write about, I have been struggling with that.

jpevear83 karma

Hey Jim,

When I watch you perform live you tend to blink quite a bit, more so than the average individual, and it's to the point where it distracts from your performance as I tend to focus on your blinking rather than your jokes. Is this a nervous tick? Do you know you're doing it and are you taking any steps to curb this habit?

Thing is, I used to blink rapidly and frequently, and I was unaware I was doing it until people started making fun of me in school. There is a doctor in the NYC area who has helped literally thousands of people, including myself, to help control excessive blinking.

Check him out:

Best of luck!

RealJimNorton88 karma

I will absolutely check into it, I hate my blinking but dont notice when I'm doing it. Thanks man for the link.

riff106081 karma

is it proper to blow a tranny after you fuck her? dont want to seem rude.

RealJimNorton387 karma

Normally before, because once you fuck her and cum, you have no desire to blow her. Think, sir, think.

Seaside_Suicide73 karma

Have you ever heard of the infamous "Cum Box" here on Reddit?

RealJimNorton81 karma

i have not

SierraNovember171 karma


RealJimNorton116 karma

I have had a lot of weeks like that, but it's not every week. So much of my sex addiction is jerking off incessantly, edging for hours. I get the dopamine drip from it, almost like getting high. AFter I cum, its right back to reality.

Seaside_Suicide65 karma

Did you hear this morning they made an arrest for those pieces of shit that killed that 88 year old WWII Vet in Spokane, WA?

RealJimNorton113 karma

Great. I hate the way the media reports it only slightly less than i hate the animals that killed that guy

angryfetis60 karma

How do you think your career would be different if you hadn't gone on OnA?

(Love you, love the show, and you are a brilliant talent on the air and on the stage!)

RealJimNorton114 karma

wouldnt be nearly as good. I owe O and A almost everything I have.

nikbar50 karma

Who are a few comics to look out for in the future?

RealJimNorton209 karma

John Mulaney is hilarious, I think Dan Naturman is really good as well. There's a redheaded boy I used to molest named Louis C something or other you should keep your eyes out for.

Dancemanleo50 karma

What is the answer you give to people who ask "Tell me a joke"?

RealJimNorton213 karma

I pull out my cock and slowly stroke it while maintaining eye contact. I never achieve erection, yet manage to ejaculate on their shoes. I wink, put my cock away, and leave.

qxzv44 karma

Do you ever get sick of dopes like us asking you about Patrice?

RealJimNorton142 karma

Never. I love that people love and remember my friend. He was such a funny and interesting guy, I'll probably be answering questions about him for the rest of my life. and thats fine.

Stiffstick40 karma

Welcome aboard Jimmy! If you could go back and take a picture with any dead celebrity but only after you ate Queen Elizabeth II's ass, who would it be and would you do it?

Also, the opening to American Degenerate is fucking fantastic! I cant wait to watch the whole special.

RealJimNorton48 karma

Probably JFK would be the one I'd get. Or Richard Pryor, which is one I will always regret not taking. I got an autograph, no photo.

mrheh40 karma

Jim just want to first of say I find you fucking hilarious and a honest mother fucker. Respect the shit out of how you and the boys are so open and honest about everything. Now to my question, I was wondering how you felt about Kain Carter stealing Patrice Oneal's and other comedians entire acts and making thousands of dollars off it. I saw you said you did not care as much because he isn't a stand up comedian but dude does do stand-up once in awhile and he sells dvd's and other things based around his "comedy". Here's a video Kain doing stand up

RealJimNorton71 karma

I didnt like it, but It didnt drive me crazy because i'm hoping it drove traffic to Patrices new CD. and HOpefully Kain was convinced, or shamed, or whatever it is, to not doing it again.

Henry_Crinkle38 karma

Jimmy, in recent years there has been alot of media/internet backlash against comics after an ad-lib or a part of their set was quoted in a critical blog post. Many of these comics have claimed that they were misquoted or taken out of context. Do you see any danger in the media accepting the validity of these types of anonymous claims? Have these events had any impact on your material or crowd interactions?

RealJimNorton172 karma

The media are pigs who dont care about the context or right and wrong, it's only the story and their ability to talk about it. Fuck them. They don't criticize each other for printing shooter manifestos, but they go after comics for saying an offensive word or joke. The press sickens me.

SergeantFartbox37 karma

Hey Sweetie, a couple questions:

How much longer will the show go on?

Who is your favorite guest on the show?

Who is your least-favorite, and why is it Joe DeRosa?

Can I intern for the show in 5 years?

EDIT: Also, why the FUCK are you late?

RealJimNorton69 karma

Favorite guests probably Ozzy and Gervais. Although Doc Gooden was amazing too. Least favorite by far was Paris Hilton. And I was late because i was an asshole not knowing how do verify myself here.

MonsteRain15 karma

Who is your least-favorite, and why is it Tom Papa?


RealJimNorton33 karma

i love Tom, although his headshape and 1962 wardrobe enrage me

oxidecool36 karma

Jim, was this tweet from Ozzy the pinnacle of your career? you meaty titted zilch.

RealJimNorton56 karma

I will never be so jaded that I'm not thrilled about knowing Ozzy Osbourne. I LOVE that he Tweeted my special.

urabusxrw36 karma

Huge fan of the radio show. I have to ask, how many more years do you think the show has?

RealJimNorton74 karma

No idea, but we are all honestly loving doing the show, the vibe in the studio has been so great for a long time now

creationinsane1934 karma

Double Guns!

Jim, my girlfriend listens to you on O&A all the time and can't stop laughing at your comments! Will you be at this years NYCC? The videos of you as Chip Chipperson are amazing!

RealJimNorton51 karma

probably yes, and hopefully doing chip

poopstainmcgoo32 karma

Is it difficult to try & explain characters like Chip, Edgar, Uncle Paul, etc. to fans of yours who don't listen to Opie & Anthony?

RealJimNorton103 karma

yes, it's like trying to explain real humor to chip, edgar or uncle paul

Seaside_Suicide32 karma

Would you watch a tape labeled "Thai Boys with Bow Ties"?

RealJimNorton73 karma

I'd watch it, start in it and executive produce it

HomeRunChipperson29 karma

Saw Doug Stanhope last night in Toronto and there are some really obnoxious things going on with stand-up audiences these days that are really fucking up a comic's ability to put on a show. Yelling shit out, filming the show, throwing off the timing. To a certain degree Doug brings it on himself by booking essentially rock and roll venues with no chairs and his fans are animals by nature... but what are your thoughts on this new wave of comedy audiences and how they seem to not understand that stand-up doesn't work when you're yelling shit and disrupting the show or filming every second a guy is on stage when he's maybe still working on material. Throw in the PC witch hunt, and people getting sued for $25K and I fear for the future of comedy, as it seems to be getting worse not better.

RealJimNorton59 karma

they're reflective of the people. we are a selfish, rude, piggish culture. not surprising.

KingPellinore28 karma

What's it like to have no shame? Only you could tell a story like Monster Rain with absolutely no shame and that is awesome.

RealJimNorton84 karma

I am filled with shame all the time. I just talk about it.

jackbowen28 karma

What's the deal with Denny? He seems nice and all, I just rarely hear you talk to him while in studio.

What's your most memorable off-air opie and anthony moment?

RealJimNorton39 karma

haha I do like Denny its fun to go UGGGH when he comes in, but hes great on air. off air? possibly when Op told me his wife was pregnant, that was a big one. I am literally running through hundreds in my head, I've spent so much time with those guys.

catchaway00727 karma

If you could anally destroy any celebrity, who would it be?

RealJimNorton86 karma

Colin Quinn

CheatingDeath27 karma

What's it really like at Anthony's?

RealJimNorton80 karma

A cross between Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and Fatherland.

rawrhaad25 karma

Hey Jim, huge fan! I just wanted to ask if you're really into shit porn, or if that's a running gag on the show. If so... how the hell did you end up getting into that?

RealJimNorton107 karma

i'm not into shit porn, but i've watched it. its fairly horrible. i felt like i was jerking off to a motorcycle accident

Borotru25 karma

Hey Jimmy,

Do you still have urges to drink sometimes? If so, what do you do to overcome them (aside from jerking off and/or hiring a lady of the night)?

RealJimNorton49 karma

no, thankfully the obsession was lifted many years ago. i'm vigilant though.


How does it feel when the shit lands on your chest? Is it worth it?

RealJimNorton100 karma

It feels wrong. Like a lizard has cut his tail off, warmed and softened it, and decided to make you a smelly tie out of it. Its not worth it. The fun is gone within a nanosecond, then you're just a silly goose with doody on your chest and tile marks on your back

imdaveo22 karma

Are you aware of all the people who listen to you are now endlessly annoying everyone they know with their own impressions of Chip, Edgar and Uncle Paul?

RealJimNorton44 karma


waytogo1720 karma

What were Opie and Anthony fighting over so much back in the WNEW days that allowed you to come in more? Did Opie ever threaten to replace Anthony with you? I know these are harsh questions. I bet you won't feel like answering them and I don't really blame you.

RealJimNorton26 karma

I dont know, I think just like any relationship things strain. Nah, never even a thought. Ant's an irreplaceable comic genius and I'm not saying that to be nice. He really is.

Johnryanhunter20 karma

You've expressed your disdain for fake outrage in the media. Is there ever a time when the general media has been "outraged" that you thought was justified? Additionally, what role should network and local news outlets play in expressing opinions when reporting the news?

RealJimNorton40 karma

Yes, i think the outrage over school shootings and rapes and many crimes is very real. The phony outrage is in the nonsense concerning terms, language and expressing disagreeable opinions

oapartyrock19 karma

Hello Jim. When you did the DVDASA podcast, how bad did you want to sleep with Asa Akira. Also, for a chick, she seemed like a fun "radio hole".

RealJimNorton41 karma

She was great. I'd love to sleep with her, but got NO vibes. I had a better shot at fucking David Choe.

hwilhweaton19 karma

"I am here whoring myself...."
Well at least one celebrity acknowledges outright why they come to this site. That said, what is your process for writing a book? Specifically, how do you motivate yourself to finish a writing project?

RealJimNorton37 karma

the only thing more irritating than making myself write is the idea of an unfinished book. I knew i'd never forgive myself if I didnt finish, so that motivated me. and i enjoy an ama, but I cant pretend its not promotional, thats insulting to the people reading it. you're not fucking idiots, you get it. so why not just say it, so you know how aware I am that you're aware I'm a whore.

zersch19 karma

What was W. Kamau Bell like off camera? Something about his eyes... Anyway, I enjoyed your side of the censorship debate on that particular episode. Thank you for entertaining me on a daily basis, hardest working boy in radio.

RealJimNorton27 karma

He was very nice. Thanked us for coming, a gracious guy

RealJimNorton26 karma

and fucking tall.

mariuscioane19 karma

I really wish you would sell this special on your website. In don't live in the US so I can't get it legally. You should take the Louis CK route, it was so easy to buy and download no matter where you live.

RealJimNorton39 karma

Foreign distribution we are working on, and it will eventually be avail on my site and Netflix, etc. Louis and Azis and Gaffigan are all much bigger acts than me, so they can do that. I dont' think I would be able to sell enough initially on my site to make it worth it.

Localtech90718 karma

Hey Mr. Norton

So did you end up getting someone to type your answers or are you doing the typing all on your own?

RealJimNorton57 karma

typing my rotten little balls off

jason128716 karma

As a stand-up, who also spends a shitload of time talking on the radio, how do you discern between a what you say on the radio, and something that might be better saved for your stand-up? Do you feel like you have spoiled potential stand-up bits on O & A?

RealJimNorton41 karma

No I feel like the radio opens my mind up to think about everything topical, the way Tough Crowd used to. Radio you can meander a bit, be slow. On stage, get to the fucking point already. Two very different modes of performing.

im_not16 karma

Hi Jimmy, and thanks for doing the AMA. Two questions:

  • Do you have any new characters on O&A that are currently in the works?

  • Have you ever re-listened to old clips of O&A? What are some of the clips/jokes/bits that have made you laugh the hardest?

RealJimNorton37 karma

no new ones as of today. and i love listening to uncle paul, that makes me laugh, or anthony's BARBARIC sound machine clip playing when lydia was in studio and that guy called in about his daughter.

poopstainmcgoo16 karma

You've had a few celebrities be rude and/or refuse to take a picture with you. Are there any that stand out that you especially hate?

RealJimNorton43 karma

Diana Ross was slightly cunty and Buzz Aldrin is a bit of a fucking cranky prick

Cipher108715 karma

who do you like more, Opie or Anthony?

RealJimNorton39 karma

neither, I like Gary.

Alias2814 karma

Little Jimmy Norton! I have to admit that you wrangled me in with your offensive and self deprecating humor. It is really amazing to see someone who is as honest and vocal as you are about your personal life and current events but...... What has really led me to respect and love what you do is your very vocal opposition to the witch hunts against comedians demanding apologies for what they say or tweet. You have pointed out and attacked the double standard where we praise Hollywood actors for portraying Rapist and Child molesters in dramatic and realistic scenes, yet we demand public apologies and remorse when a comedian makes an off color or offensive joke.

  1. Do you feel the opposition to this "I am offended" trend is growing or are the special interest groups and media getting their way as more comedic entertainers are being silenced?

  2. In your opinion what rising comedian should we keep an eye out for? Do you have a favorite we should know about?

  3. You are notorious for going to great lengths to get a photo with celebs. Is their a time you just do not want to be bothered for a autograph or photo?

  4. I HATE YOUR GUTS is an amazing book. Right now who do you hate the most?

Thank you so much for what you do Jim. You are leading the way for Free Speech and a comedian/entertainers right to perform whatever material they choose without fear of special interest groups or the media. Believe it or not your rants are seen more as a battle cry than a rant to many of your fans. Dont ever Stop being a meaty breasted Zilch

Jim Norton defends offensive Memorial Day Tweet on Fox News

Jim Norton defends Danial Tosh Rape Joke

RealJimNorton25 karma

I do feel people are getting sick of it yes. I DETEST the phony outrage and I think more and more people are aware and sick of it. The times I don't want to be bothered is when I"m eating or trying to get a girl to fuck me, although I'll still take the photo. Right now I hate Nancy Grace, who I see as a capitalizing predator. The media in general is repulsive, but she looks like Frankenberry fucked John Lithgow and than shat it out on the floor.

reebsgeebs13 karma

Hey Jimmy, big fan of yours and the O&A show, I started listening a while after seeing some of your stand ups and was wondering how your process works on gathering material for a show (do you adapt some bits from the radio for the stage, or do you try to start from scratch? Do you notice any difference in the reception the bits get?). You do great work, keep it up, I haven’t been able to see you perform live, but I’ll be in NY mid September, hope you or maybe Chippah will be doing some shows.

RealJimNorton29 karma

I normally just go onstage at the comedy cellar in ny with an idea of what i want to talk about, but not too sure where I want to go with it. I bomb quite a bit working out the new shit, and eventually it clicks, and I begin to build from there. I want at least 35-40 totally new minutes of brand new material before I go out and headline a club.

OP_never_delivers13 karma

As someone who hasn't heard much about American Degenerate, can you tell me what it is about and why I should watch it?

RealJimNorton49 karma

It's quite a hoot, there are no curses or sexual jokes, so its perfect for the kids.

notstephenfry12 karma

What's your favourite word? IT BETTER BE FUNNY

RealJimNorton29 karma


mjh8412 karma

why do you like trannies?

RealJimNorton74 karma

Because I have taste, sir. Why do people like caviar, fine wines and sunsets? Don't be such a racist.

Gunnarrufhaus12 karma

What is something that you DON'T have anything to hate about?

RealJimNorton38 karma

The new Black Sabbath album

rottengymshorts12 karma

Has there ever been a caller to your show where you felt/thought "This person is fucked"?

RealJimNorton47 karma

Yes, Anthony this morning

throwawayaccount200511 karma

What's your favorite porn site?

RealJimNorton32 karma is a hit. I've heard shemaleyum is quite a fun one, of course i've never gone.

rjl_11 karma

How did you hook up with the Tonight Show, to begin with? Has that directly opened up any doors for you?

RealJimNorton18 karma

I had done it since 2004 when I had my two episode run in with last comic standing. Bob Reed and Ross Mark convinced me to send a tape in for Leno and I'm forever grateful. Its definitely helped me tremendously.

way_fairer11 karma

How many fingers can you fit in your rump at one time and how many are in there now?

RealJimNorton23 karma

Somewhere between two and eight

tritso10 karma

I want to preface this by saying all of your comedy specials are masterpieces. A lot of your jokes, though, are very topical, and revolve around current events. Are you worried that, years from now, they will sound dated, or do you think the jokes will overshadow the historical context? Thanks Jim, good luck with your special.

RealJimNorton19 karma

No because Carlin and Pryor did topical stuff, Woody Allen in the 60s, etc. Its like a time capsule when you see old standup, reminds you of what was being talked about.

filifunk10 karma

What male comedian gets the most women? Who has the best game?

RealJimNorton41 karma

Probably Colin Quinn, because he talks to them until they doze off then puts his tiny penis into their belly buttons and makes cumsies.

C-Ron10 karma

Have you ever thought about going through lengths to trademark/copyright the Chip Chipperson persona? There are tons of really shitty local comedians and improv groups that have blatantly ripped off the character. Even shows like SNL and Chelsea Lately have done similar things.

RealJimNorton36 karma

I have so many hours of chip its easy to proves hes mine. who else would try to claim him in open court?

Penfish10 karma

Hey Jimmy, big fan.

I wanted to ask you about your history with sex addiction. You were one of the first people I know who came out and was vocal about this being a social issue, so thank you!

Did at any point in your life you felt like sex was your primary motivation for everything? What's it like now to share this information with your audiences?


RealJimNorton19 karma

Yes it becomes very overwhelming. I love sharing stuff with the audience because if it has a name, someones' done it. We are only as sick as our secrets.

gazanga10 karma

What's your technique to keep from stepping over all the competing talent on the show? It's one thing to be the only guy in the room with a mic, but when you have 2 hosts, staff, comedians, and celebrities all in the room; how do you handle know, besides peeing in someone's oatmeal.

RealJimNorton25 karma

I dont need to try and be the center of attention every second. My instincts are pretty good like that, and i know what i hate so i try to avoid it.

greenlightning10 karma

Jimmy you fucking rule. Two questions: One. Do you get annoyed when fans come up and do chip & uncle paul lines, or do you see it as flattery?

Two. What's the weirdest thing you've ever jerked off to?

RealJimNorton13 karma

Its flattery. and the weirdest thing was listening to a woman talk about when she fucked her bf's dog years ago. Animal porn does zero for me, but her perversion I found very hot.

beam19859 karma

Who is Grocery Man's arch nemesis?

RealJimNorton21 karma

Soggy Bag Magillicutty

geth_o9 karma

What is the most vicious insult that you know?

RealJimNorton34 karma

calling someone a 'bucket of nerts'

fervt9 karma

Have you done something in the past that out of context could come back to bite you in the ass, like the cakestomping?

RealJimNorton16 karma

I'm sure hundreds of things. But nothing I care about really. I am a fairly good egg and would do the best I could to defend myself.

brimstn9 karma

Hey there little fella. Is there anyone from your psychotic childhood idolatry that you haven't met and/or became friends with yet?

...and congrats on the weight loss via hard work instead of AIDS.

RealJimNorton16 karma

I cant think of anyone. Ali I met, although we certainly arent friends. I didnt even interview him, but it was amazing all the same. He was the last one I think. DeNiro and Pacino and Nicholson are 3 I need photos with badly

HotDogg229 karma

Hey Jim, If you couldn't do comedy anymore (hypothetically) what is something you would like to do with your life?

Love O@A you guys make my shitty job pass bye a little faster for the 4 hours your on…


RealJimNorton15 karma

either interviews or writing. I have very few, if any, other skills

azphaking9 karma

Hey Jim. Congrats on the special. Can't wait to see it.

You Op and Ant seem to be really on the same page and getting along really well as of late. Is that palpable in the studio? Why do you think things seem to be a bit...lighter lately?

Also, as you have mentioned, you are working on TV pitches. Do you think that writing process helps or hurts your stand up writing? Do you keep the two writings separate or can you borrow from one for the other?


RealJimNorton16 karma

i think it will help because i won't obsess as much about stand up. sometimes your brain needs to relax, look somewhere else for a bit.

Reps9208 karma

Hey jimmy,

Has fame been everything you always hoped it would be? I can imagine the expectations from fans meeting you and wanting that "show" it more difficult for you to be yourself now(in public) than it was when you were cutting your teeth earlier in your career?

RealJimNorton25 karma

I am moderately famous, but I havent really hit mainstream fame at all. I love the fans and my interactions are almsot almost always good with them. I am pretty honest, so I can always be myself in public. I think thats why they like me, I am flawed like them

mdnash8 karma

I saw you once at Comedy Cellar about 4 or 5 years ago and this jackass I was with kept raving on about how much he loved you but referred to you as Ed Norton.

This guy was driving me insane and I finally corrected him but not until after he screamed "I LOVE Ed Norton!" right after you finished your set.

I'm very sorry for the way this jackass acted and for all other fools who have treaded you with similar disrespect.

RealJimNorton33 karma

I dont mind. Feel sorry for Edward Norton, who has to be confused with a guy who admits jerking off to a dog fuck story

im_not8 karma

Jimmy - you've been doing stand-up for a while, but are there ever things that, even as a stand-up veteran, you learn not to do on stage? Like, are you still adjusting certain things, or is your strategy when on stage basically set in stone?

RealJimNorton12 karma

sure, you always improve if you're working on what you do. I will always continue to get better i hope. I dont mean that as the 'stock answer' but its true

annfranksloft8 karma

Hey Jim, I'm a huge fan of your comedy specials and the 'Norton and friends' show on satellite radio. I'm curious, would you drop radio or comedy for another direction in the entertainment business? It seems like most stand ups do specials until something else comes along.

RealJimNorton14 karma

i love standup and radio, they're not stepping stones. I want to do them in addition to other things, not until i get other things.

talltree20078 karma

Hey Jimmy Happy Birthday! What was it like filming your opening with Micheal K Williams? What's he like in real life?

RealJimNorton15 karma

Hes amazing. I called him and he agreed to do it immediately. I cannot believe I'm fucking friends with Omar. And Marlo. I'm just a fanboy.

DontSassMeParilla7 karma

Hey Jim, I know you guys bring it up a lot- but is there any REAL discussion of moving to a more high profile studio with an actual visual elements- maybe even bringing back the audience? How is management not embarrassed of multiple low budget podcasts running laps around one of their most high profile shows? If there is any murmurs of an upgrade- any timeline you can give us?

RealJimNorton9 karma

probably not going to happen. it depresses me a lot, but motivates me in other areas of my career.

evildeadtim7 karma

How doyou feel about all these recent comedians blowing with television shows like legit, schuemer, and ck. do you think it's just a fad or a bandwagon for people to get paid or do they deserve it because they may have been overlooked?

RealJimNorton15 karma

I am happy to see amy and louie and jim doing well, its better for all of us. they are legitimately funny, not hacks or shticky. The better they do, the more the overall mentality of tv will change.

CarlosDanger0077 karma

Have you guys tried to get Kain Carter (the guy who ripped off Patrice) on the show?

RealJimNorton15 karma


Sticky_Z7 karma

Who has been the most fun for you to work with in your years of standup.

RealJimNorton16 karma

Too many to name, but I love a good Otto and George gig. I miss working with him a lot

mariuscioane7 karma

You attacked a newspaper for endorsing Quinn for mayor of New York a few days ago. While I do get your point, don't you like their honesty? I wish Fox News and MSNBC would do the same thing and not pretend they are fair and balanced.

RealJimNorton19 karma

The thing is, they don't do it to be honest, they do it to sway votes. If they were being honest, they'd admit their ideology goes into how the stories are written, or that they selectively edit certain things.

ScoleriBrother7 karma

I probably missed the answer to my question but: Why did you retire Theodore Sheckler?

EDIT: ok, well then of all your characters which do you despise doing? and of all celebrities (musicians/actors) that you havent met who would you like to meet?

RealJimNorton14 karma

Ted hurts my throat and I go through phases, He'll be back dont worry. I enjoy all of them, uncle paul and chip the most by far. I'd love to meet a president, or to interview one. I know, good luck

TryHarder236 karma

How do you overcome that initial fear of "taking chances" when starting a new project, or getting up on stage? Or, for that matter, when a new prostitute removes his/her panties for the first time and you learn whether you have a boy/girl?

RealJimNorton11 karma

you only get over the fear by walking through it. and with the hooker, i close my eyes and wait for my surprise.

Ky3666 karma

Jim the new advice show is great, I love hearing your take on everyone's sexual shenanigans. One question, do you Bailey J as attractive as Joe DeRosa does? ps. SLOBBOOOOOOO

RealJimNorton12 karma

I do, dont you? shes a doll.

pad_lock5 karma

You were talking on Joe Rogan about ideas for a sitcom? Even though you're already an established comedian, how hard is it to get a sitcom on TV? Jim Jefferies show Legit was great I'd love to see a Jim Norton sitcom in the future.

Also, you're probably sick of him but Chip is one of my favourite comic creations ever. Big fan, keep it up Yimmy, I hope this special is your big mainstream breakthrough.

RealJimNorton15 karma

I LOVE CHIP. thank you sir. I'd love a sit come too. tss or a STAND com tsss. whateves tsss

huggie2304 karma

Hey Jim, huge fan. I was at the infamous T&A with O&A. How much fallout and heat did you and the guys take for that? Can you speak about the event some? Was there even more craziness behind the scenes?

RealJimNorton11 karma

we almost got arrested, but luckily got thrown off the air a month or so later so it went away.

Slaythoven4 karma

How is Andrew Dice Clay these days? Do you still work with him / see him around?

RealJimNorton9 karma

Hes great, saw him in vegas recently. I love dice

CynicalBanjoBear4 karma

Hey Jimmy, I’m a huge fan and wanted to know your take on the internet’s impact on stand-up. Social media is the main way to get your name out, but can get lost in all the noise. Is it helping or hurting in the long run?

RealJimNorton10 karma

i think it helps over all. more noise, also more opportunities and chances to go viral

rboyles4 karma

Hey Little Jimmy, I have been listening to O&A since the time I first met E-Rock as his Manager at Movie Gallery in Florida. He turned me onto the show back in 2006 and I have been hooked ever since. My question is, you always talk about stories from your past on the show, what is the funniest/worst story you have about a fellow comedian that you have never shared on O&A or any other radio program. Thanks!

RealJimNorton9 karma

I really cant think of one that hasnt been shared, i talk about almost everything.

muzakx3 karma

How is Amy Schumer in bed?

RealJimNorton4 karma

I imagine shes pretty good, and then pretty mean immediately after

DontSassMeParilla3 karma

Fuck, Marry, Kill - Ron Bennington, Fez and Pepper Hicks.

RealJimNorton7 karma

I'd fuck all of them then kill myself