I am a penpal with serial killers. AMA.

Do you think this increases or decreases your chance of being killed by them if they escape from prison?

Haha. I'm not sure. I've heard rumors of Manson sending family members to the addresses of people he's written but have luckily escaped that pleasure so far.

Who the hell would send there address to charles manson?

Fearless idiots like me!

haha apparently, don't you think it would better to send from a PO box or something??

I'm really not too concerned. All of the guys I write are on death row and most of them are in San Quentin while I live in the midwest. Also, I'm a student so my current address is only temporary.

Seriously, you don't do a PO box or anything?

Nope. I mentioned it elsewhere but (1) I only write people on death row, (2) Most of them are in San Quentin while i live in the Midwest and (3) I'm a student so my address is only temporary.

What's the creepiest thing you've read?

Jablonski's detailing his crimes and saying that he hopes his victims rot in hell. The second I read it, I sensed pure evil.

Will you show us some? Or maybe type it out here?

Most of his letters are 5 or 6 pages long and his handwriting is terrible. I don't have a scanner on me. I might be able to type out a paragraph or two. What specifically would you be interested in reading?

The most strange part, please.

Ok, without getting graphic, here's a few snippets: (I left in his spelling errors.)

"She was a virgin. She didn't report her rape. She kept coming back for fun and games [...] she deceased by my hand. They both deceased. It was one best murder/rape/sodomy I committed." On a second crime, "They joined in my evil plan for both them. When I killed pig [n-word] I thought I got two [n-word] for the price of one. But I settled on there mother. I crave I <3 Jesus in her middle of back she suffer hard for real time. Before I decede to her worse life from her this was the real best murder I committed."

Right after that, he goes into "I am great animal lover. My unusually pets was a three legged red tail fox name Fellow. My mexican step daughter age 8 and 11 yr old find fox. His little family was made up silly cat. I don't know how cat lifed without the fox eating them. All crazy stuff he pulled or Fellow strecked himplay with Tail, pat him, or toe with his paw, play with ear, grooming him. Fellow let silly cat sleep in Tail. Fellow and Silly Cat sleep on the Bed with me".

That is so scary. He is much more lucid in the murder description than he is in the pet part.

That was on the 5th page of the letter. I don't know if that contributes to it.

would you say that the letters you get are similarly disjointed in their language? Or are others more lucid and, I don't know, have some grammatical order? Because that letter was just rambling, that dude did not seem with it at all.

Jablonski and Manson are certifiably nuts. Randy Kraft is definitely the most articulate (it doesn't hurt that he types his letters). Most of the guys aren't very aware of grammar though. A lot of the letters read like someone just learning English because they make really basic grammar mistakes. They typically have way better structure than the example from Jablonski.

Man this guys got a pet fox? I want a pet fox. Thanks for writing that out man. Your a champ

No problem. Since you like that, he also writes "there was a tame jack rabbit named jumper. No Fellow did not eat him."

How do you reply to something like that?

I honestly haven't responded yet. I'm not sure if I will.

Is his English really that bad? That is horrible, I wonder if it because he wasn't educated properly or is really just crazy.

I actually don't know about his educational background so I can't comment on that. But, it's not just his English that's bad. His structure is so incoherent. I really think he's crazy.

Due to a lot of requests, I ended up uploading the entire letter. http://beggingoceanplease.imgur.com/all/

Did it take long to establish any kind of trust with them before they opened up?

It varies. People like Jablonski are dying to talk about it while others say they typically avoid "groupies" but have found sincerity in my letters and opened up.

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That'd be Jablonski. You can see where he erased and re-drew certain areas. haha

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You should see some of the stamps they use. They're usually cartoony or smiley faces. So strange.

Do you feel sympathy towards any of the killers you've had letters from?

I do but then I remember why they're in there.

Which was the most ordinary thing about them?

They all love talking about their childhood pets.

Why do you think that is?

I think there's a possibility that it's their human/soft side. Maybe animals have treated them better than humans. However, a lot of them have also admitted to killing animals so it's a bit confusing to me.

What do you say to them, initially? How do you start the conversation?

I don't address their crimes. I just write a one page letter introducing myself and asking some basic questions about themselves. I figure they'll steer the conversation in the direction they want to take it. I also think it makes me seem more sincere.

Do you use your real, full name? I'd be pretty weary of giving serial killers my full name and address, even if they are locked away for life..

Yup. I could've gotten a PO Box but didn't find it necessary.

Do you see any similarities between you and any of the serial killers?

Forgive me if this has been asked already. I scrolled through pretty far, but I did not see it.

That's a new and interesting question! One of the guys (I actually forget who) likes some of the same tv shows I do. Other than similar interests, I don't see any similarities.

I myself have always been fascinated with psychology. Are there any common themes/line of reasonings that these killers have told you? Maybe a common justification for what they've done?

Some of those I've written have alluded to poverty in their childhood but lust seems to be the biggest common denominator. There's definitely a huge difference between the people I write though. People like Jablonski and Manson seem literally insane while others seem much more articulate. Also, Jablonski loves to glorify his murders whereas others deny their guilt.

What do you think the root reason is for glorifying his killings?

I really think he's lost grip on reality.

Did you ever exchange letters with someone claiming to be completely innocent?

Yes. Randy Kraft just sent me a letter the other day with "evidence" regarding DNA and fingerprints found at the crime scene. He's made printed pamphlets about his innocence.

What are your thoughts about this? I'm curious if, since you correspond with them, you get a kind of 'advocate' type attitude toward them?

I think he's full of shit.

What is the most interesting letter you've received?

By far, the most interesting letter I've received was Jablonski's. His entire letter completely glorified the killings. He went into extremely graphic detail and discussed some murders that have not been attributed to him. It's hard to tell what's true and what's not. It's more difficult to tell whether he's so insane that he believes his own stories. Part of the reason his letter was so interesting was that it jumped around so much and was extremely difficult to follow.

Have you ever sent one anything besides a letter?

I've sent nature or art pictures out of a magazine for a few people. And a little related, Randy Kraft offered to knit me something. I think I'll take him up on it.

Was there ever a letter that disturbed you or gave you nightmares?

Jablonski's disturbed me but I haven't had any nightmares. I have an extremely high tolerance for stuff of this nature. I'm one of those Dateline/48 Hours junkies so it would really take a lot to cause nightmares.

I love those shows too! Do they seem like relatively normal people when they're not talking about murder?

I have an interesting story then. I don't know if you've seen the Amber DuBois Dateline or 48 Hours (the story was on both). Anyways, I wrote Manson and after Manson wrote me, his friend John Gardner (DuBois' killer) wrote me. It was so odd because I recognized his name but knew I hadn't written him. I googled him and realized I'd watched him on tv.

I've had multiple occasions where I catch myself laughing at a joke they make or being genuinely interested in their letter and then I remember why they're in prison. It's quite strange although I'm sure they were so "successful" in killing because they were able to adapt to society so well.

I remember the DuBois story! How creepy...how do you think he found out about you if you hadn't written before? Do you ever worry about anyone coming after you?

I wrote Manson. He's one of Manson's ATWA cronies. Apparently Manson also taught him guitar lessons. He wrote to me regarding ATWA so then I responded to him specifically about his crimes and that's how I started writing him.
I'm not worried. First, they're all on death row. Second, most of them are very old (Gardner is the outlier). Third, I'm a student so my address is temporary. If I was really worried, I would have gotten a PO Box but I don't find it necessary.

I just looked up Jablonski on Wikipedia. HOLY SHIT. Wasn't surprised to find he had a history of physical and sexual abuse as a child. Have you found this to be common among these guys?

Thanks for all your answers! This IAMA is fascinating!

None of the guys have mentioned any childhood abuse which I find really interesting. Regarding childhood, they tend to mention (1) pets, (2) crimes they committed when they were young and (3) poverty.

Do they open up to you, or do the prison people check through all the letters?

They open up in various degrees. The prison does go through their letters.

How did you get started doing this? Have you met any of them in person?

I've heard of people doing it. I'd always been intrigued about doing it myself but always dismissed the idea for various reasons. I ended up discussing it with a few friends and they all encouraged me to do it so I thought it over. There's a few sites that compile famous prisoners addresses so I ended up sending off three letters in my first batch (I believe the first one I wrote was to Manson). I've really enjoyed reading their letters and haven't looked back since.

I have not met any of them and I think it would creep me out way too much to do so.

So anyone could do this, theoretically? How many of the people you wrote answered your letters?

Yes, anyone could. I would definitely research it before doing so though. The majority of the people I've written have responded. The only person I've really wanted a letter from and haven't gotten one from is BTK. I've heard he rarely writes though.

That's surprising. From what I've seen and read about BTK, he's quite narcissistic. I would have assumed he loves writing about his escapades.

That's what I thought too! I heard it's because he's afraid it could ruin a potential appeal. If you haven't read this, I highly recommend it: http://www.amazon.com/Inside-Mind-BTK-Thirty-Year-Notorious/dp/0470325151

Interesting that he actually thinks he has a chance in hell of having an appeal approved regardless of letters.

He got captured because he thought the detectives were on his side. I don't think he's the most rational guy.

Aw shit. I know what I'm doing all weekend.

http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLIM69ClSRdQ8lOzzYmKjS214vNIi6Mefn

http://www.darkdocumentaries.com/category/serial-killer-documentaries

Can you send a link?

Here's an example of one:http://writeamurderer.yuku.com/topic/448

Have they ever tried to start something sexual with you? I would assume that a lot of letters they get are that kind of stuff.

No although I've heard Ramirez gets sexual with the people he writes. I've never written him. I've had a few guys clarify my gender, which is a little weird since although my name is sometimes a guy's name, it is about as girly of a name as you can get but it didn't progress after that.

Thanks! I have another question. You said you have also worked in a jail. Did you find it easier to sympathize with them when you read their letters or when you saw them in real life?

Definitely real life but for a few reasons. First, I didn't know what the inmates were in there for. If I really hit it off with one of them, I'd look them up to see why they were in there. Some of the nicest guys were in there for violent crimes (like hogtying a pregnant woman and young child during an armed robbery). I think not initially knowing their background helped me connect with them as just another person. Second, letters seem static, especially when you factor in the down time between receiving another letter. Real life conversations allow for a freer exchange of conversation so it's easier to connect with inmates in person.

Are any of your penpals pleading innocence?

Randy Kraft. I said it somewhere else but he sent me a pamphlet about his innocence.

Do you plan on writing Kai the hatchet wielding hitch hiker while he's in jail?

I'd rather wait for a conviction and life sentence so I don't end up dead : )

This is weird! I don't think I could write to these people. My question, have you seen a murder type movie lately and thought "This is fake!" or maybe felt that you understood the view of the murderer because of what you now know? As in, you can see from their perspective.

Hm. I can't really think of anything. Some movies seem too dramatic but if you research these guys, you realize it's pretty spot on.

Do any of them tell you what they miss most about being "free"? Also, have you ever written to the BTK killer? I'm just wondering because I was in that area when he came back "out" the second time around in the early 2000s and I was seriously creeped.

BTK is my "favorite" serial killer. I wrote him and haven't heard back. I'll probably try one more time. I've heard he doesn't respond to people because it could mess up any chance of getting out (as if there is a chance).

None of them have addressed the freedom. I've been shocked with how "free" they are though. Most of the guys have tvs! One was telling me how much he loved Vampire Diaries....

Would you be willing to try picking the most interesting one and hooking up a snail mail AMA?

Elaborate? I don't think I'm following. You want me to pick the most interesting penpal and asking him your questions?

Start an AMA thread where everyone can submit their questions. Take the top ten or fifteen or whatever and mail them to whichever one you think is most interesting and articulate.

Thanks for doing this AMA, by the way. I've always wondered what it would be like to randomly start writing serial killers.

alright. i'm about to go out for the night but i can do that tomorrow or later this weekend. there may be a few questions i'd prefer not to ask but other than that, it sounds like a good idea!

How did you start writing to them?

Pasted from another response but: I've heard of people doing it. I'd always been intrigued about doing it myself but always dismissed the idea for various reasons. I ended up discussing it with a few friends and they all encouraged me to do it so I thought it over. There's a few sites that compile famous prisoners addresses so I ended up sending off three letters in my first batch (I believe the first one I wrote was to Manson). I've really enjoyed reading their letters and haven't looked back since.

Ive got so many questions.

1. How many of the killers are mentally instable? How many are completely sane?

2. Do they often tell you, or brag about their crimes?

3. Are there any common themes in their lives? Ex: broken household, abusive dad, etc?

4. What insights into their psychology have you found? I have an intrest in human psychology too, thanks for doing this AMA.

1. There is a huge variance regarding mental stability. Jablonski and Manson are completely insane. You can tell by even looking at their handwriting (much less even looking at the content) that they aren't completely there. There's others that seem sane and even sorry for their crimes.
   
2. Jablonski is the only one that has glorified his crimes. Some, like Randy Kraft, maintain their innocence and others briefly addressed their crimes but have wanted to talk about non-crime related subjects.
   
3. There's not a definite trend but I have seen reoccurring subjects like poverty and lust pop up.
   
4. I'm honestly working on evaluating this right now. I'm not sure since their letters are all so different. I hope to consider this more this summer.

Thanks for replying.

They express remorse for their crimes? Do they ever tell you what their motivation for their crimes was?

That doesnt surprise me since you said Jablonski is insane. When you say Manson, you are talking about Charles Manson, correct?

Okay, that makes sense to me.

Id love to hear what you come up with in your evaluation! Would you be willing to send your results to me in a PM?

Gardner expressed remorse which I thought was surprising, given the media I've seen surrounding him. The motivation for a few seems to be rooted in their childhood or based on an insatiable lust.

Yes, Charles Manson.

Sure, I hope to be able to write them more frequently now that school has ended.

That's interesting. Would you say handwriting analysis is a valid means of assessing a person's mental stability?

I wouldn't have thought so before this but it is clear that, at least to some extent, there's a correlation.

Do you feel compassion for these people, and how friendly do you get with these guys?

I can't help but feel compassion for at least some of the guys. For example, Randy Kraft is 68 and wrote to me about doing 200 burpees a day to stay healthy and attached a pamphlet proclaiming his innocence. I feel terrible for his victims and their families but I can't help but feel some compassion for what his life has become. At some point, he was a little boy like everyone else and something must have went wrong.

And a quite bright boy at that.

He's by far the most intelligent and articulate of my penpals.

How long do you think you'll write to them? Are you worried about it affecting you too much?

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Have you ever gotten to a point where you feel yourself thinking about them too much? Like their words stay with you for awhile? If so, do you do anything to clear your head?

Jablonski's was the only one to really disturb me. I could barely finish one of his letters. I dealt with it by smoking... Probably not the most healthy coping mechanism but it worked.

What happened to Sam?

Sorry. Wrong name. I meant Jason Moss. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jason_Moss_(writer)

Do you believe those you talk to, and serial killers in general, can be rehabilitated?

I'm honestly not sure that I've drawn an opinion regarding that based on the content of their letters. However, through extra research done on the side, I don't think serial killers can be rehabilitated.

Have you ever thought about corresponding with Scott Peterson?

I have. I've read he doesn't respond to most people so I probably wouldn't have much luck though.

Any interesting stories?

I guess it depends on your definition of interesting. Jablonski's letters are extremely interesting. He jumps around with various stories. He'll discuss in graphic detail his crimes (including carving words into one of his victim's skin) and then immediately transition into talking about how much he misses his childhood pets. I think the thought process might be more interesting than the stories themselves.

how do you get these inmates addresses so you can write them? also would you ever go visit them in person at the prison? i've read a few things about murder groupie's and find the women equally as interesting as the killers

There's sites that compile inmate addresses. If they aren't on there, you can find it by going to the prison site and searching the address. I would not visit them in prison. That would creep me out way too much. Jablonski is engaged to one of his penpals. Considering his letters to me have been very graphic, I wonder how that came about.

Have any of them responded negatively towards you?

Nope. I haven't heard back from a few but that's the most "negative" it's been.

I understand that you have an interest in the psychology of serial killers, but why? What is the specific interest you have? And why do you think this will answer your questions as opposed to learning from professionals?

I don't know that I can pinpoint it. I guess it's just extremely intriguing to me. I'm not sure I can explain the allure other than that. I don't think it's necessarily an either/or option. I've read a lot of literature regarding serial killers but this acts as a supplement to that.

Alot of females will write love letters to killers whom they have never met. Not saying this is your intention, but do you have any insight on this mentality?

It's definitely not my intention as I'm gay. I honestly have no insight other than they're probably missing some attention that they get from these men.

You mentioned that some of them are on death row, have they ever spoken to you about their fears of dying or does it not seem to bother them?

No one has mentioned it. I may try and think of a way to gently ask though.

I have thought of doing this as well because, like you, i thought it would be interesting. My father, who works for NCIS really dissuaded me from it but not for safety reasons. These people who are on death row are the lowest kinds of humans beings and they are FLOODED with letters every day from people who want to know about them and their crimes. Why waste your time on them? no matter what answer they give you it will never justify or truly explain their actions. receiving mail from people who give a shit about them and want to speak with them is probably the best part of their day. If i had it my way i would let these people rot in a cell with no outside contact. By writing to him you give him a chance to glorify and relive his crimes which undoubtedly is pleasurable for him. I understand the natural human curiosity towards morbid topics by why give him your time when he has already stolen so much time from his victims?

This was my biggest consideration before writing them. I haven't returned Jablonski's letter that I typed an excerpt from because he clearly does relish in glorifying his crimes. However, individuals like John Gardner have expressed remorse and seem fairly sincere in their regret. He said he'd take it back if he could and that he feels bad for the families of his victims. Others have been extremely excited at my letters because they aren't a Ramirez or a Manson who gets heaps of letters and enjoyed being able to talk to someone on the outside. Finally, I used to work at a jail and got to know some of the inmates who were in there for terrible crimes. The biggest lesson I learned was that, at the end of the day, they are people too.

Are you scared that they know where you live?

They're all on death row. Also, I'm a student and am only living here temporarily. Although, I received a letter from a killer I hadn't written. (I had written Manson and his friend wrote me.) It was a little creepy that he got my address when I hadn't written him.

Being that you're talking to a bunch of dudes on death row, what are your opinions on the death penalty? Do you support it? If not, what do you think should be done with these guys instead?

I've always been on the fence about the death penalty. I'm against it because I think it's a worse punishment to die in prison rather than being set free through death. It's also more expensive than life sentences. But I'm also for it because it can provide families the solace they need. Because I haven't lost a friend or relative to murder, I'll continue to stay on the fence.

I definitely think life sentences are the way to go but I think it's absurd that they get some of the privileges that they do. Pretty much every guy that's written me has discussed his favorite tv shows. Seems a little luxurious to me.

Isn't this illegal in the US? I mean publishing other peoples private letters, even partially? Or does being in jail/death row somehow revoke the right to privacy?

That's why I've refrained from posting letters as a whole. I didn't think a paragraph would be bad. I can assure you Jablonski feeds off this sort of attention.

Hey this is a cool AMA. Questions:

1.) Do you correspond with David "Son of Sam" Berkowitz?

2.) I'm curious about your background. What is it that these killers see in you that makes them want to respond? You don't have to be too specific, but just curious on how it started. Did you mail them first and say "Hi my name is so and so, etc?"

3.) Do you ever get hate/rejection letters from people you try to write to?

1) I wrote him a letter but haven't heard back. I'm sure he's one of the more "popular" ones. It may take awhile to get a response from him.
2) Guys like Jablonski will glorify his crimes to anyone he can. Others (Randy Kraft comes to mind) mentioned that he rarely writes because he hates groupies. I'm not sure why he chose to respond to me. I write them very casually the first time...kind of what you'd think an elementary school kid would do when writing a penpal. I introduce myself, ask some basic non-offensive questions, NEVER bring up their crime (they'll bring it up if they want to), and give them my well wishes.
3) I haven't gotten any negative response. There's been a few people who haven't responded, like Son of Sam.

This AMA is fascinating (y)

If you could make any sections of the letters public that would be great!

Did you see the part of Jablonski's letter I posted? I'm actually not sure on the legality of uploading the entire letter from him.

why? and how could i become a person who does this?

I've answered both of these questions. The short answers are (1) that it intrigued me and (2) you can find any prisoner's address through either, sites that compile the info, or through the prison's site itself.