IAmA 23 year old boy with Stage IV Kidney Cancer. I won't see 24, AMAA

Listen to me.... If I can make any difference I will be happy. Hence my username, I am a 15 year old, 5 time cancer survivor. I have been fighting for 5 years and I just got news that I beat it for the 5th time. My cancer's survival rate is 10% and 5% for those who relapse... If they give you an opportunity to fight hard... You do it. It will be worth it if it works. I have faced death and have been revived before... I hope that things turn better for you I really do. The whole thing really teaches you a lot about life..Enjoy the simple things while you can...

Pm me.

If you ever want to come to Chile my wife and I would be more than happy to have you at our place.

Wife here: Please come visit.

We are sorry this happened to you. Both of us have lost people to cancer and know how much it hurts.

Edit: Please, please come stay with us. We would be more than happy to have you. PLEASE?

You two are truly amazing people.

I love you so much

can we send him on some kinda world wide holiday

Somebody set up a fundraiser for this! http://www.gofundme.com/OceanSkysVacation

EDIT: removed link by z3phyr13's request.

EDIT 2: link reinstated after z3phyr13 confirmed that she's had contact with OceanSkys and that the fund has been transferred.

Note to OceanSkys: Please contact her to arrange the transferral of the fund. If this is a bit overwhelming, we understand! It is of course 100% up to you how you spend it, so if you haven't responded because you're apprehensive of spending your time on the other side of the world, don't worry (we're not going to force you on to an airplane)! Note that there is enough money now to bring family/friends. :) We just want you to have to most awesome time you can possibly have, so do whatever with it. Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here and you're actually just busy answering people, but I felt like this needed to be said. (Also hope I'm speaking for others, too...)

I cant breathe. You guys are too much

This is way great, and the goal was totally blown out of the water. But can we urge people from this point on who are interested in making a donation, to make a donation in the honor of oceanskys to their favorite cancer research center? Sadly a lot of people will die much too early due to cancer. And a lot of them won't get an amazing opportunity like this. But with funding research, we can help extend survival rates and give a great gift to thousands of people.

Upvote.

Im crying my eyes out over your guys generosity. I think the worlds going to be okay as long as there are people like all of you around.

I have spoken with WePay/gofundme about the whole US v. Canadian debacle, the CEO of the company gave permission for WePay to write him the check and mail it to him through secured mail!!!

I know that there has been a lot of speculation about this but I'm going to do everything in my power to get him the dough, and it sounds like WePay is bending over backwards to make it work as well. I will post email confirmation from WePay in a bit.

I would love to help contribute financially to you going on one last kick ass vacation. My mom is currently going through chemo and I know how hard it can be.

Have you thought about setting up some sort of fund, i know its shitty asking, but i bet a ton of us redditors would contribute.

EDIT: I set up a fundraising account, go here if you can make a donation :D lets get the OP on another amazing vacation

EDIT 2: HOLY SHIT! You guys are amazing!!! I've pm'd him several times to get him to log in and put in his info. He hasn't gotten back to me yet. Basically I set up an email so that he could easily log in enter his info then change the pass and stuff so he could get the money. Once he responds I'll get him to comment that it's legit, or maybe make an edit in the op.

EDIT 3: I pm'd a copy of my drivers license and stuff to a mod :) hoping that gives me a little more credibility.

I've spoken with OceanSkys, verification should be up soon! Also, i've done additional verification with OP to make sure he is who he says he is. Keep Contributing and Upvoting!

More big news, redditor Brad Angelo (FukNGrvN), the guy who donated 3k already will donate ANOTHER 3k if we get to $15,000. Everybody help this good cause!

Its not something I've thought about, If somebody else set it up, I think it could be a cool idea but its not something I would ever actually ask for.

I have always feared this moment. Getting a diagnosis and knowing what is going to end my life. Are you happy that you have time to prepare? Are you happy that you have time to say goodbye to friends and family and life?

Or, do you think you would prefer to die suddenly and never have time to feel the sorrow?

Anyway..... just wondering what you think. I wonder how I will feel about it in the future. After all, what you're going through will happen to almost all of us someday (except those of us who die suddenly).

Stay strong. I hope you enjoy your life to the fullest. That's really all any of us can do. As for me, you've reminded me that life is precious and fleeting. I will go try to be more productive today (and hopefully in the future) because I read your story. Thank you for sharing.

Wow, if I could do that for only one person, that is really cool! You should never take anything for granted, and if you ever have a random pain or something you are unsure about... GO to a DOCTOR.

As for your question, I like the idea of knowing when its coming to an end, however I kinda thought this sort of situation would happen at 82, not 22. However, I have had friends die in senseless car accidents at 18 and thinking it over, I'd probably rather have my situation.

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I can has real hugz?

That's an absolutely amazing perspective. I have not once heard anyone have a reason to be grateful for cancer, yet here you've done it. And rationally.

Yes, some people don't get any warning signs and their life is just taken suddenly. The fact you have time to get some kind of closure I can see being a positive thing by comparison, but before today I never would have seen it that way.

Thank you for helping me see life in a slightly different perspective - I hope others close to you realize how amazing your outlook really is and can learn from it. Too many people I know have so much and don't appreciate it enough. Perhaps it's when we don't have as much that we truly appreciate things more.

I wish you an amazing life with positive responses from others, regardless of time limits that may have been set.

Thank you so much for the kind words you just wrote about me.

Ok, this may be inappropriate but.. planning on getting laid a lot during your remaining days?

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She is hot as fuck, this can be essentially confirmed from her gonewild post. OP you DO NOT WANT TO SAY NO TO THIS. For real.

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Whoa. I just woke up. What is happening here!!?!

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somebody made a meme about me??

/Made it

Yep. Bunch of random strangers bought you a vacation, awesome hot redditors offered you the sex, you got a meme made about you (insert OneDoesNotSimplyMakeAMeme.jpg here) ... I'd say your day's off to a pretty good fuckin start, man.

Im seriously so filled with positive energy right now

Usually in the morning I get really nauseous and sometimes vomit but today I feel SO great!

You guys are truly amazing

Not a question, I'm just here to tell you I love you man, and my prayers and wishes go out to you.

I love you more

I read this and thought about how you might analyze every aspect about life now and even the simplest of statements or smells or tastes, etc. But it just seems like such a euphoria you're given about life because you know it's coming to an end. I'm afraid sometimes to think about if this were to happen to me, but can't help but feel I'm not living to the fullest right now and I'm only going to be able to drop all my cares if I'm given a notice of when I'm going to pass away. If you look at in in a different light it's not really a "gift" but it's something that's given to only a few of us. Knowing when you're going to pass is just mind boggling to me and I apologize for your situation. I wish the most comfortable of comfortable months to come. I have so much more to say because I've thought about this kind of thing A LOT, I've always imagined me developing a brain tumor at an early age.

Edit: [6] right now, I apologize if some of that went off tangent or didn't make sense at some points.

You are right, my perception on life and every little thing around me has completely changed, its like im permanently on ecstasy. Except ...not because I also have moments that I just burst into tears. Don't worry too much about living life to "the fullest" just worry about being happy while you are here, helping or teaching other people who maybe arent as happy as you. Smell the flowers, they won't always be in bloom.

How are your family and friends reacting?

Like everyone else is posting, I'm sorry this is happening to you.

Honestly, not as I would expect. Some friends just don't know how to handle it, and you just don't hear from them. Other people that I once brushed off as highschool aquaintances have showed amazing support and demand to come visit me just to see how I'm doing, which I appreciate more than they will ever know. Still, others care but they didn't react like how I thought they would, almost like they don't know the severity of it.

My family has always loved me very much and they are doing nothing but supporting me in any way they know how. I know my Mom and Dad are just crushed. They can't believe this has happened to their "baby" (I'm the youngest) My brothers are all taking it hard, but one of them is like my best friend and I don't know what he'll do without me.

Also, my cousins child kind of blabbed his mouth to my Nephew that I had cancer, he's only 7 and he really doesn't understand whats happening but he does have it in his head now that i'm going to die, and lying down with him crying, holding him as tight as I can is something thats really hard but brought us closer

God damn, this story just breaks my heart. Stay strong not only for yourself, but for your family. This might not sound like much coming from some dude on the internet, but your words make me want to go hug my family and just tell them I love you.

You would be surprised at how much that comment effects me.

Go hug em :)

How did the cancer get so advanced without you noticing any symptoms?

Because Cancer is a fucking asshole.

I've been told my cancer is very very rare and "aggresive" and it hardly ever responds to chemo, which I have no found out first hand

But the thing is, even with the chemo, I don't lose my hair or otherwise "look sick" in fact, if I didn't tell you, you would never know. And neither did I.

I used to work as a line-cook and one night during dinner service I complained to my coworker about some pain and a bump that had appeared literally 2 days prior.. I ended up leaving the shift because it hurt so bad, I spend that night in complete agony in my apartment before I realized I have to go to the ER so I did. I remember laying in the hospital bed, kidney gone thinking "wow, 10 days ago I felt 100% ok"

So, did you quit that job when you found out?

I had to, yes.

I was kinda like the main-guy at the restaurant, and I remember when a nurse called my boss to tell him I had to have my kidney removed and I wouldnt be coming into work later that day (duh) his response was "Well what about next week!?"

In my head, I always thought I could go back to work someday, but that is not the case.

What were your first signs? Where was the pain and the bump?

Those were the first and only signs. it was right where the kidney is, however the bump was to the front so right under my ribs basically

I want to give you the biggest hug imaginable.

And I will totally marry you, if you like girls with redish-purple fauxhawks.

I'm sure your hair doesn't define your beautiful personality :)

How are you going to spend the rest of your time? Are you scared?

I am terrified. I am spending the rest of my time with my family mostly, and my friends. Just being surrounded my those that love me and nobody else because I truly don't have time for negative people.

My dad took me to Hawaii, just me and him. A friend and I went to Mexico My mom, brothers and I also went to Mexico

The dream is to get one more trip in :)

If you make your last trip to Australia, I'll marry you. No sons though, sorry.

ETA: I didn't mean to start a big debate about the pros/cons of marrying a stranger, my looks, jobs I've had in the past, whether I'm creepy or sweet, etc etc. I can't help but feel this thread has become a little bit too much about me offering to marry the OP, and that's not quite right IMO, so I'm gonna stop replying to the comments about it. Thanks to the people who thought it was a nice gesture, sorry to anyone who was creeped out. Good luck & best wishes to the OP.

ETA again: I'd love to donate to the OP so he could go to Jamaica or whatever, and some Redditors below seem pretty generous too, so I think the OP should definitely open a Paypal account for that purpose.

When I graduated highschool, my best friend and I moved to Australia for a few months. I cherish those memories so much!!

are you beautiful? we will need proof, the internet won't let OceanSkys marry just anyone

I approve this message.

Wasn't there a guy giving away a free plane ticket the other day?

The winner of that ticket had a much more heart wrenching story than mine.

I want to see OceanSkys donations reach 20k. I vouch another $3,000 if we hit $15,000

This person FukNGrvN is on a whole new level of human compassion

I have no words, this is just crazy

Throwaway account to avoid identification from IRL reddit friends:

Me and my SO have been arguing a lot recently, the issues never important, but the quantity of the arguing has been tremendous.

Reading your AMA and your answers were really hitting me like a sledgehammer and putting a lot of things into perspective for me. It made me think about what matters in life and what doesn't. It made me think about the things I've done that should have been done differently and the things I can do to be different for the better going forward.

Most importantly it made me feel like the lowest of the low, I shouldn't have to read about something terrible from someone so brave to make me stop and think about what it is that makes and will make me a better man. I should just do that everyday.

At first I felt pity reading your AMA, but shame on me. You're inspiring and the only pity I have left is for how I've treated those closest to me. I really hope you get that last vacation to Jamaica and live out the rest of your days as happy as you've ever been with the ones you love.

I don't believe in the afterlife, I find solace in knowing that we live on through the consequences of our actions. I want you to know that your actions on here have caused me to promise myself not to wait for just the next humbling experience to question my actions and make a change. I'm going to do it every day and for that I thank you (I'm an ex-smoker too, so I've got the will power). You've affected more than you can know and for that I love you.

Stay happy.

You are amazing

Is there anything we can do for you?

I feel like in you giving us this honesty, we should do something for you? Like thoughts or an action or something like that? Thanks for sharing this with us, me, everyone....

To be honest, its comments like that which is why I really think I'm doing this

Just so everybody knows, this is really hard for me to do, and I feel like I'm about to loose my virginity with all these butterflys in my stomach

But if I can make people think, appreciate, love just a little more than that is soo cool! I think I'd be some sort of asshole if I was like "Yea, of course. Give me money!" Because that isn't what I want... or need. Im not gonna lie, if this AMAA got really popular, it would make me a really really happy boy

My son (7) is a cancer patient (Ewings Sarcoma). He is recently in remission, but the relapse rate is extremely high. During chemo, he would become an emotional roller coaster - cuddly one moment and angry the next. The Nurses referred to it as 'chemo brain'. Have you noticed any emotional or similar effects from the drugs? How can we best comfort him through this? What have your loved ones done for you that you will always cherish.

Also, from your comments, I know that you don't believe (and I am fine with that), but I am praying for the best for you.

whoa!

Ive never heard of this but it is TOTALLY true!! The best way you can comfort him through that is something you wont want to here...give him some space.

My family constantly tries to help me out in any way they can but sometimes it has the exact opposite effect. I always like it when my family says "If you could eat anything in the world, what would it be" and when I answer...they get it for me.

To Brad Angelo, who just donated $3,000, you are a fucking hero to all. I don't believe in real life karma, but if It exists you deserve all of it.

Somebody donated 3000 alone?

This can't be life.

Dear OceanSkys, everyone else is posting a question with this morbid curiousity that we all share. It is making me so sad. And I know that doesn't matter, with you dying soon and all, but what's your favourite Pokemon and why?

Id love to give you some obscure answer but if I'm being totally honest with myself

It has always been Pikachu

Any specific things that you want to do and are feasible for your time left? Sorry if that was a bit blunt.

Well, I do think one more week-vacation is certainly feasible, but its not like I can go anywhere in the world! (cost)

So if I can take one of my parents to Jamaica or something, that would make me pretty happy.

Like I said before, the only real things I ever wanted in life are sort of long term things like kids and owning my own restaurant etc. Not skydiving or bungy jumping or anything

Id really like to take a nice girl on a date and have sexytime one more time though :)

I'm pretty sure you could definitely find a girl to go out with you and have some sexytimes.

yea... the whole "terminal cancer" line doesn't fly as well as you think it would.

I will totally go on a date with you if you come to Canada! :)

Come to BC

2 years ago I lost my 21 year old little brother to cancer.

He wasn't visibly afraid (I am sure on the inside he was) but he faced death with poise and dignity.

I remember sitting with him in the hospice and just not knowing what to say to him.

My biggest question is what can you say to someone in your situation?

Has anyone said anything particularly comforting to you throughout this process?

To be honest, no...

I've only gotten standard condolonses from people I was crying one time and I said to my older brother "Ill never get to have kids"

And he said, crying too "Ah, the're little shits anways"

That made us both smile. Simple Moments <3

This might sounds like a dumb question, but I'm genuinely interested: What kind of music do you listen to?

I do enjoy many genres of music however I'm a gigantic rap music fan, and I like to feel like I have a pretty decent knowledge of it.

Ive also gotten plenty of happy days out of listening to Owl City. A little far off my beaten path as far as music is concerned but it just...doesn't make me feel so sad.

I am 23 years old as well, and your AMA made me think a lot. Knowing that I could be diagnosed with something like this, with no prior symptoms or signs... I am also very concerned with death, it is a scary concept isn't it? There is one question that I want you ask you the most:

Do you still have hope even though the odds look bad? If not, have you accepted your faith? If you did, what is the "conclusion" that you have come up with? And how do you find comfort in that?

The hardest thing at first was hearing everybody saying "Your such a strong person, you're going to get through this!!"

It just simply isn't like that. I do still have hope that I can make it to 24 but the odds of me making it to say 25 are 0. No way around it. IF in the meantime, somebody came up with an all-out cure...Then ok... but those things take years, and nothing is in development

Hi, I'm a 20yo cancer survivor (had rhabdomyosarcoma twice. once when I was 14, again at 17). For me hearing "Your such a strong person, you're going to get through this" was hard because to me it implied that the people who died from cancer were somehow less strong, somehow fought less hard. It hurt to hear people tell me I was "strong" because I knew many other strong young people who didn't make it.

Cancer sucks like no other. Seriously. My absolute best wishes to you for your happiness and comfort.

wow. You are such a little fighter

PM me

I don't really have a question some I'm just going to say thank you for bringing insight into all of our lives and showing us how one day, your life could just be over so don't put off anything. Hell, I'm going to tell a girl I like her tomorrow just because of this!

Please don't be kidding.

Tell her.