I am Lynn Ruth Miller, 83 year old stand up comedian, cabaret performer, and storyteller. AMA!

What do you think the key is to a happy life?

Denial

Hi!

I'm a big fan of stand up comedy but have always been too nervous to consider trying a set at an open mic. When you were first starting, how did you get over the jitters? Or are you just a natural performer?

Thanks!

I just bit the bullet and did it. I kept telling myself these are people just like me and they too put their knickers on one leg at a time. I am not a natural performer. I learned how to do it by doing it.

What is the worst you have ever bombed at Stand-Up?

I was doing comedy for a stag party of Stanford graduate students and had included a strip in the routine and my clothes got caught in the wire of the microphone. There I was, 75 years old, drooping as we old people do, half naked and my audience was sleeping.

How do you know when you're old?

You never think you are, darling until you get on a bus and everyone stands up in unison to give you a seat.

If you could tell yourself of 50 years ago one thing, what would it be?

Chill

What drew you to stand-up and what keeps you doing it? Also, what's the best piece of advice you've gotten along the way?

I told a joke as part of a comedy course I was covering for a magazine and when everyone laughed ; I decided to try it again...and again...and again. I keep doing it because I am addicted to laughter like some people are addicted to alcohol. The best piece of advice I ever got was that because I am out of the box, I need to create my own shows.

Hey Lynn! Its Hunny Bunny! How are you?

I live in London and I am having more fun than I ever have. The eighties are the best

what are the key elements to a worthwhile story?

Sex. Surprise. Credibility

when you say credibility, do you mean like, believability or attention to detail? And thank you!

Your listeners have to think what you are saying is true. It never is of course. They also have to WANT to believe it is true.

Have you ever performed with Garrison Keillor?

He is too old for me. I would not risk a hip for him.

His hip or yours?

Not sure he still has his.

Well, can you tell me a story?

Once upon a time there was a little old lady who told a joke. Everyone laughed but she was too deaf to hear them. She did not live long enough to live happily ever after. That is not autobiographical.

Any regrets in life? Is there anything you would do differently knowing what you know now?

No because at the time I knew no better

I genuinely love this answer :-)

What if you knew better every single fucking time?

But you never do. Hindsight is the only thing that's 20/20.

What's your opinion on Bo Burnham?

I have never heard him. but I am sure he is very funny.

How come your Instagram is empty? Can we get some pics in skimpy little outfits?

Go to You Tube and type in my name Plenty of skimpy little outfits there

You and zipster08 should do a collaboration 😁

zipster08

He's too old for me.

How old were you when you started? I've always loved performing and comedy but the confidence isn't where it used to be. (aged 29 if that matters)

I was 71 years old When I was 29 I was totally defeated and went to Stanford to get a masters in Journalism. I never did figure out what my passion was until I started comedy. I always thought it was men.

how to tell a vivid story? every time I tell people things they lose interest half of the way and another person would cut me off.

Paint a picture with your words. Show do not tell. In other words describe the day do not say it is beautiful. Your listener will make that judgement.

Is there a line you won't cross or a subject you won't touch when doing stand up? Or is every subject up for grabs?

I SAY every subject is up for grabs but I do not keep to that. I refuse to say anything cruel to another or to create a disgusting image. I stay away from scatological humour because I find it is often disgusting. But that is my own personal bias. If someone wants to talk about anything at all, they should. If people take offence, it is their problem not the comedian's He has a right to his opinion.

I'm reading The Kid Stays in the Picture (memoirs of Robert Evans) - didn't know much going in despite loving film, but it's been a great read so far. Since he's had sex with every other woman your age, just wanted to ask: how was it?

I can't remember.

pretty good burn

I don't think it burned. I use lube.

What do you think your parents would think about your occupation?

They would kill themselves if they knew.

Ms. Miller, Do you tell jokes from things your children and grandchildren do in their lives and behavior?

I have no children or grandchildren I would never do that to my vagina

Hi! I remember seeing you in San Francisco (Oakland technically) as part of a Hubba Hubba Revue show at the Uptown a few years back. You were amazing, and so funny.

What drove you to get into and continue comedy so late in life? How do you keep up your energy?

I am driven by fear. What if I die tomorrow and I don't get it all done? Every success drives me to try to get another.

Very excited to see you in Ireland! What book, to you, is the most important or insightful?

In Comedy? Steve Allen wrote a lovely one about his career . In ordinary life, God of Small Things is the best book ever.

Most people I meet at your age seem mentally dull, slow. You on the other hand seem sharper and more quick witted than I've ever been. What's your secret? What keeps you so awesome 83 years in?

The only that's slow about me is my bowels. My secret is caring. And a lot of prunes.

I'm 17 now, what do you think are the most significant changes in the world since you were my age?

The internet. We live in one world now.

How was Arundel on Friday after I left? I was sad to miss your set, seemed a fun crowd.

It was magnificent I so wish you had stayed.

What is your creative process to come up with new material? In other words, How do you write jokes?

I write until I get something good.

I've just started doing standup comedy ( here's my first, awkward, try at it) and I've realized that it's not just about humor- it's about being able to talk about the things I can't talk about politely or write about. It's about talking about the most embarrassing, fucked up, and really sad things but making them into a punchline- so, is that why you joke so much about age? Because it's the most fucked up thing that happens to all of us and laughing about it makes it easier?

There is also a huge bias against women in the industry when we get older, but you're still going strong and vivaciously doing you- can you give any insight into how you accomplish that?

There'll be biases in everything you do. But if you're good at what you're doing (and that takes work, time, and repetition) people will only remember how good you are.

What's often overlooked when telling a story? How do you get their attention and keep it? I imagine those aren't necessarily the same skills.

The plot. It is important to weed out any words that do not lead to the conclusion and equally important not to digress and lose the thread of the story.

Do you actually make a living wage doing this?

No, but I make a beautiful life.

Ms. Miller, What are your favorite new technologies from this decade?

E mail. I can keep in touch with people and use my writing skills

Tinder isn't a bad second.

Would you like to parlay you stand up into sitcom/movies or would that get in the way of your stage performances?

I am not interested in TV or movies. I like the interaction I get with small audiences That is what drives me.

Hi Lynn! This is your favorite stage manager from Hubba Hubba Revue. How has your particular brand of storytelling translated across the Atlantic? Do you feel that San Francisco and London audiences are entertained differently by your comedy?

We miss you in the Bay Area!

I love Jim Sweeney. Good entertainment is good entertainment on both sides of the ocean.

What's your response when people say women aren't funny?

Have they heard me?

Yo Granny, you on Tinder or nah?

I don't need to be.

Would you ever host snl? You would be amazing at it

If they asked me, I'd do it in a heartbeat (not that I have that many left).

As someone with a growing interest I professional storytelling, I'd like to know your opinion on the storytelling scene today?

I think it is a shame people do not tell their own stories instead of others that someone else wrote. I also find in London and San Francisco that the art is not properly respected. You cannot earn a living from original storytelling; only if you are parroting someone else's tale.

Comedians live on the edge of acceptable and unacceptable, and walk a fine line.

What's your take on politically correctness, and all this talk lately of 'triggers' and identity (gender, sexuality, racial identity, etc.)?

In comedy, NOTHING is off limits. It is the only way we little people can show how ridiculous the establishment is, how artificial, how materialistic, how cruel. Furthermore no matter what you say, if it is meaningful it will offend someone. If it offends no one, it isn't saying anything at all.

I saw you perform at the Tomorrow Show a few years back. You were quite funny. How's things?

EDIT: added a question.

Magnificent I am in London now making the English laugh and believe me that isn't easy.

Coming from Ireland where he have a long history of storytelling I have always been fascinated with the art and would love to know if you differentiate storytelling from comedy. Do you have many engagements solely as a story teller? Do they even exist anymore? Also welcome to Dublin, I hope you enjoy it. The international is a great spot.

Comedy is twisted reality and surprise. Storytelling is validating the human experience. It is deeper and far more meaningful. I rarely get a chance to do stories and that is sad. I LOVE The International and I love Dublin. All the pipes in the old buildings leak and so do I

Have you ever thought of doing a Cabaret show in Thailand?

I am doing comedy in Thailand in January I would love to do a cabaret show there It is the best combination of what talent I have . Who do you know?

Did you ever smoke weed in your youth? If you did, have you smoked it lately? I'm not trying to fit into the silly burnout stereotype; I genuinely think that, as a storyteller, it is a fun segment of society to learn about. I apologize that I am unfamiliar with your work, thanks for reading.

No. I don't like to lose control of reality; I like the life I'm living too much.

who do you think are the funniest people alive today?

We all have our moments.

What joke or video of yours do you personally think is the funniest thing you have produced?

Wasn't even a joke

Ms. Miller outside of telling jokes what are your hobbies?

Painting. And sex, I think.

What was the revoltutionary war like?

noisy

This. This was the laugh i needed today. And with one dumb word, you gained a fan. I hope i can find you in texas soon.

I lived in Wimberley and I found my people.

You seem delightful! Is that your dog in your twitter photo? What's your favorite pet story?

No, that dog is a pedigree, mine was a mutt. His name was David and he gave me a reason to live.

Ms. Miller, what are your comedy career goals?

I want to do more and be more and never stop.

Lynn, do you write material or do you perform with your material just in your head? I'm interested in doing stand up, but i'm not a great comedy writer just yet. Any tips?

I write all my own material but I never bring up notes, which means I forget a lot.

Hi! Loved you on Britain's got talent!

How do I gain confidence and skill to talk to people and not shit my pants? (How do I plan to start doing stand-up?) Thanks!

Just do it, and wear diapers.

I am writing a television pilot about San Francisco in 1973, particularly about the Tenderloin/Castro districts. Did you ever happen to run into Magnolia Thunderpussy when you lived there?

I did not live there until 1980.

Ms. Miller, Which British Celebrities have you met?

To me everyone is a celebrity.

Hi Lynn! I would like to be a storyteller. What are some of your favorites?

Flannery O'Connor.

What's the key to good storytelling?

A good story is very human.

Do you ever have to improvise? If so, is there ant way to do it effectively?

I often improvise, and the secret is to be honest. The big mistake that people make is that they try to be clever.

How many tinder dates do you go on on average? 😘

No one has sent me a picture exciting enough yet.

Edit: Meet the love of my life.

What is the worst you have ever bombed a show?

I answered that

How do you distinguish between good jokes and poor jokes?

Also, certain audience/people have certain tastes and its not possible to cater to all tastes. How do you approach this issue?

When people laugh it's a good joke. The art of comedy is to make a bunch of strangers come to the same conclusion. The conclusion that I want is, "that's funny".

Are you single?

I have many, many loves. I live alone but I'm not single.

When you "work blue" is it because you've stopped breathing?

I don't think anything human is blue. Except Beyoncé's baby.

What's your funniest joke?

"The good thing about dating at my age is that you don't have to meet their parents."

So, ummm... when... do you think youre gonna die?

When I'm done.

Do you know where your soul will spend eternity? Have you invited Jesus into your heart ? What is the state of your salvation ?

I am fucked

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That is one helluva hair cut