I am an open adopted son. My sister is also an open adopted daughter from a different birth mother. Finally, my adoptive mother is an adoption attorney. From my perspective, open adoption is one of the best solutions to unplanned pregnancies, under certain circumstances that is. For example, I wouldn't recommend open adoption with a birth mother and father who are mentally unstable and/or abusive or the birth family in general produces a harmful environment.
In my case, my birth mother was in a similar situation as yourself. She was 19 and was barely capable to provide for herself at the time. I have no recollection of exactly when I was told that I was adopted, I have just grown up knowing that I was adopted. Our families (birth family and adopted family) would always get together for the holidays at least once or twice a year (as a child it was always nice having my birth family live near Disneyland). I have been fortunate to have both families to be very open and loving. I would say that my relationship with my birth mother is analogous to an aunt-nephew relationship. We usually keep in touch via phone or Facebook. Last month I visited my birth family to celebrate my birth grandmother's birthday.
I commend you for having the courage and responsibility to put your child up for adoption. Especially in your case for providing the same-sex couple such an amazing opportunity to to provide a higher quality life that you're unable to provide at the time. I have had many conversations with my birth mother about her experience, and it is not easy an easy task. I wish you and your families the best.
If anyone has any questions regarding the other side of the adoption feel free to ask. I may need help figuring out this commenting and messaging process because I literally just made an account to provide insight on this subject.
thecheerio12 karma
I am an open adopted son. My sister is also an open adopted daughter from a different birth mother. Finally, my adoptive mother is an adoption attorney. From my perspective, open adoption is one of the best solutions to unplanned pregnancies, under certain circumstances that is. For example, I wouldn't recommend open adoption with a birth mother and father who are mentally unstable and/or abusive or the birth family in general produces a harmful environment.
In my case, my birth mother was in a similar situation as yourself. She was 19 and was barely capable to provide for herself at the time. I have no recollection of exactly when I was told that I was adopted, I have just grown up knowing that I was adopted. Our families (birth family and adopted family) would always get together for the holidays at least once or twice a year (as a child it was always nice having my birth family live near Disneyland). I have been fortunate to have both families to be very open and loving. I would say that my relationship with my birth mother is analogous to an aunt-nephew relationship. We usually keep in touch via phone or Facebook. Last month I visited my birth family to celebrate my birth grandmother's birthday.
I commend you for having the courage and responsibility to put your child up for adoption. Especially in your case for providing the same-sex couple such an amazing opportunity to to provide a higher quality life that you're unable to provide at the time. I have had many conversations with my birth mother about her experience, and it is not easy an easy task. I wish you and your families the best.
If anyone has any questions regarding the other side of the adoption feel free to ask. I may need help figuring out this commenting and messaging process because I literally just made an account to provide insight on this subject.
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