stack_trace44 karma2013-04-27 17:22:59 UTC
Ms. Pizzey, I have spent the better part of this morning looking into yourself and this cause that I am forced to share given my current predicament, and I think it's incredibly serendipitous that you are doing an AMA right now. Firstly I want to thank you for all that you have done to bring attention to this in spite of the amazing hardships that I know have been imposed upon you. I am currently the victim of a false abuse allegation that warranted a protective order rendering me homeless and unable to see or speak to my two little girls in the midst of a Chicago winter. My soon-to-be-ex-wife had an affair that lasted three years culminating eventually in her abandoning myself and the girls to live 900 miles away with her boyfriend. After some time she claimed to feel guilty and wanted to reconcile. I knew it was a gamble, but I honestly had no idea just how vindictive she could be. I suppose nobody wants to think that this can happen by the person to whom you've promised the whole of your life. After a few months of living together she made her move. I am now fighting a divorce that I can't afford against somebody who is paying for absolutely nothing. She has taken my girls, to whom I was the sole custodian and provider. She has created problems with our landlord, and now I've been tendered a notice to leave my apartment. When the universe sets out to crush a person it doesn't seem to stop.
So that's what I've been going through, and with all that time to write you would think I've had plenty of opportunity to think better on what I want to ask; Obviously, I need help. Desperately. My research into local men's rights groups all seem to funnel into a law office that is far beyond my means. Is there anything that you could recommend? I'm sorry to be so vague, but "at a loss" doesn't begin to describe me right now. I just got off of a 12 hour graveyard shift (the least of my worries, I still manage to have a fantastic and supportive job) and should have been in bed hours ago, so I hope you can forgive my lack of direction.
Equally as important to me right now, what can I do to help others in my current situation? To add some credibility to what I'm saying I have purposefully NOT used a throwaway account (which I may sorely regret) such that the reddit detectives can see that I'm a web hosting Systems Administrator and I would absolutely love to provide whatever service I can offer. I also do some blog writing (technical mostly, but not by choice) and would gladly involve myself in any creative outlet available to myself that may possibly be of service to other fathers. Please let me know if it would be worth anybody's while for me to send a PM or an email.
How the hell am I supposed to handle this? Since this has occurred I have seen and read nothing but bleak accounts often terminating in suicide, which I won't say hasn't been notable factor in considering my own outlook. I'm not trying to be morbid or plea for attention; Please don't get me wrong, I have no intention of ending my life as I still have two little girls to fight for and I do realize that I'm still fairly young. How does one deal with the fact that no matter what you do or how well you fight, there is really no such thing as winning? How does one deal with the emotional toll of being thrust into a mess where suddenly anybody who has any power is out to either hurt you or profit from your pain?
Once again, thank you for all that you do and all that you are. Thanks as well to all of the redditors who have read through my long winded rant and provided me with the cat gifs that have helped to keep me sane. I really hope I didn't miss the train here.
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stack_trace10 karma2013-04-27 18:31:28 UTC
Thank you. We do have something similar to the McKenzie Lawyer, although it's more 'official' than a friend. My ex had one before she got an attorney and they were provided by the state. I'll send Walter an email and I'll most certainly keep an eye on the site and blog. I'm now (finally) off to get some sleep, but I look forward to going through the rest of these when I wake up. If anybody has any good resources for Chicago or IL please don't hesitate to reply or PM me.
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