speathed

Or an Ethiopian husband. That guy would have no problem chasing you for miles and miles.

r/bad_cop_no_donut can't believe what they are reading

Right after it steals your wallet.

Elasticity.

Glad you called it football (or fitbaw as it's known here in Ecosse) and not soccer.

Hibs = Hibernians, from Easter Road in Edinburgh. Their city rivals are Hearts (Heart of Midlothian).