snowmyr

Speak for yourself, man. I've got my own system.

They can just unexpectedly dump you at any random port in the world?

Damn.

I've often wondered if I'll die from masturbating too much

I agree to a point, this person has an obvious financial incentive to want people to pay for porn and the safety part feels a bit cringey. (although I don't know enough about the subject to completely dismiss it)

But she also mentions the whole "this is their job and they deserve to be paid" stuff.

And that part is kind of obviously ethically in her favour. This is in regards to piracy, not viewing legitimate free amateur porn.

That was my reaction.

This is her account of what happened.

"We went out the next afternoon as I had suggested last night and we ate our clam chowder breadbaskets over looking the wharf’s bay, watching the seals playfully barking at each other on the rocks nearby. Shortly after we were driven to the private airstrip and took off for Los Angeles.

On the plane was an unexpected visitor. Matt Groening the producer of the The Simpson’s [sic] TV show was catching a ride with us. I was so excited, as I loved watching his show and acted like a star struck fan, asking him everything from his initial idea for creating the show to where he got his characters from. He told me it was all based on his own family make up, but without the crazy father and son scenes of Homers [sic] hand around Bart’s throat.

I was enjoying our conversation, when Jeffrey insisted that I give Matt a foot massage throughout the duration of the short flight. I never turned down a client but when I saw the shape of his feet, I nearly threw up at the thought of having to touch them. He had yellow crusty toenails that even someone with a chainsaw would’ve had troubles cutting through and then there was the fluffy balls of leftover pieces of sock wedged between the crevices of his sweaty toes, now that was the real icing on the cake for me, no way could I attempt this I thought. Then I had an idea. I went to the back of the plane and rinsed a wash cloth in warm soapy water and returned for his dreaded foot massage but not before attempting to clean them first.

In return for my services Matt was kind enough to draw me two quick sketches on blank paper from his briefcase of my two favorite characters, Homer and Bart. I asked if he would make them out to my little brother and dad, the true fans of the family not missing an episode during dinner over the past ten years or so. Next to the A-4 size drawing he was able to fit in the quote “To my greatest fan from Matt Groening” and their names next to it. I knew they’d absolutely love it, and it was such a nice gesture his feet were no longer an issue as I laughed it off and even made a joke to the comedian about getting a pedicure before hitting L.A.’s beaches.

The flight was only short and we arrived in busy L.A. within the hour, saying Good-Bye to Matt, who was a pleasure to meet."