savvoi-

1. Patience is an absolute virtue. These kids are damaged and very very afraid.
2. Show understanding for their situation.
3. Ask them what they want, ask them what is right for them. Come to a compromise if it doesn't match your rules.
4. It is okay if it doesn't work. You did your best. Thank you very much. Your efforts are never futile. (Try to not let it get to this point though lmao)

The rest is just shit you'd do if the kid was blood related to you lmfao. That is your child for the time being.

If you see a little one in a situation similar to mine and you want to be a direct mentor, you gotta let them know that you have their back.

If they're anything like me, they're not going to want it; as I grew with a fear of people and a fear of getting hurt by them.

But if they're anything like me, they're gonna need it.

I wasn't given the opportunity to safely fail as a child. Whenever I did, my mother ridiculed me.

Let them know that it's okay to fail and it's okay to fall behind, as it's literally human nature, and you'll be there to support them with whatever resources you're willing to give.

It will be a hassle, but be patient.

It's like trying to make friends with a stray cat lmfao.

Hopefully this answers your question.

I personally dealt with issues from the police, as well as issues getting the motivation to pass classes.

Past experiences built an attitude of righteous indignation. Nobody understood me and it felt as if the people I was living with were directly agreeing with the enemy (the governmental/school system). I lived in a system that didn't fit me, then got yelled at by the people that were supposed to care, which cemented the inner loneliness that was instilled within me.

So I was either like "Fuck this! I'm not going to school! Fuck the system!" and then get in trouble with police OR I was like "Fuck this. I'll do it myself. Time to fix the system." and then fail my classes cuz I had ADHD and didn't know how to study lmfao.

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It's kinda funny, because there is help out there. Many amazing people on this very AMA are willing to do what they can to help these kids.

They just can't trust the world, so they either don't know what's out there that can help them, or they're too scared to approach it.

Adults have to be louder about it. Especially teachers. It helped me to know that there were groups that wanted to see me succeed.

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I don't know if that answers your question, if not, please reiterate and I'll try again.

Everything a regular kid needs but double everything that isn't physical lmao. Double the understanding, double the listening, double the attention, double the patience.

Ask them how they're feeling, ask again if it's a simple one word answer, let them know that it's okay to be sad. Reassure them that if they fuck up, you'll be there for them.

The "love" word might be weird. Best not to use it unless they do.

Good luck and thank you.

Absolutely. Reassurance from a kind mentor is simultaneously welcoming and not welcoming at the exact same time. I wasn't used to it so it was weird and cringe, but I needed it.

Tell that kid they're gonna be okay. Tell that kid that you got them. Let them know that its okay that they fucked something up. Let them know that you'll still love them.

If they're anything like me, they'll act like they won't like it lmfao. But it's necessary.

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Something that was harmful was a lack of healthy communication with the parents, and a lack of understanding from the parents. They didn't feel like someone I could trust with anything, let alone my feelings.

Thank you for the advice and I'll be sure to keep it in mind! I was a little afraid a month or so ago because I had poor executive function. I didn't believe in my ability, and I didn't see college as something fun. I'm better with it now. Thank you friend.