samanthasgramma

I am so sorry that you didn't have this in your life.

I very honestly believe that your parents are very much missing out on the joy of having you in their lives. They have lost so much. I've read your answers and you are smart, kind, have humor, and a courage that I doubt I could rise to myself. If you are a teacher of children, you are sharing yourself in a most wonderful way, much as a good Mom would. If you teach adults, it is helping them become better people, and that is incredibly noble. I think your exes are morons, and that you will, when you least expect it, stumble upon the person who treasures you for you, and you will feel safe.

And I send my very warmest and tightest hugs. As many as you want.

It was always so important to me, as a parent, to encourage my son and daughter to be "you". Just be "you" and that's more than good enough for me. It's the best for me. I want them to always feel good enough, just as they are. And they both are wonderful human beings, warts and all. They're about your age. I still tell them that they are good people and this makes me more proud of them than anything.

I'd be very proud of you.

Do you think that this attitude of parental support for "you" might have made a big difference for you, or did you find that anxiety for what general society might think, was the greatest influence? I'm not expressing myself well ... I think I'm wondering how much supportive parents might have made up for social anxieties.

Thank you for your answer. And I do tend to check subs like "eyebleach" for novel content, while being loyal to subs with specific interest postings

My kids turned me onto Reddit. My son has been on it from the beginning, and preferred the first years because it held far more unique content, with smaller communities, in which users grew to know each other fairly well. As well as you can "know" a username. I, also belonged to a sub which suddenly grew huge, and preferred it smaller for the same reasons. Did you find the same pattern in your research? That smaller groups, with a greater feeling of intimacy, were favoured?

I worked in Law for many years, primarily Family and Child Protection, and am bound by confidentiality, not just professionally, but ethically. My husband and son are computer technicians, so privy to many very secret things, and also ethically bound to confidentiality (although we'd share amongst ourselves). We also live in a small town. We know more actual, true, secrets about other people than anyone has the right to know about anyone else, but came into them professionally. We also keep the secrets carefully, and pretend we don't know them when dealing with the people themselves. If the issue involved something like a minor pedophile, on a computer, we'd gently tell parents. Otherwise we are mum.

Has your research shown any ongoing detrimental effect of carrying around so many people's secrets?