popojo24

Dude, you can finish reading, but the story is never really done. I had to go at it with three different analysis/ structuring websites open to help try and gulp down some of what was happening. Was it worth it? Hell yeah. But also no.

I’m not the OP, but have experience with drug addiction. When it comes down to it, these things exist on a spectrum and can sort of manifest differently for every individual— but ultimately, anyone addicted to any of the things you mentioned would be attempting to fill the same hole.

It’s a hobby until it’s the only thing you can meaningfully engage with in your life. Over time, you get more stressed out and more unhappy because literally everything else — from the simplest day-to-day tasks, to your long term goals — now begin to stop bringing you fulfillment in any way, maybe even making you feel worse. Then when finding the motivation to force yourself to do those things becomes impossible, you return back to what is now your addiction. You hate yourself and feel like a failure, but at least this is something you can do, that you sort of enjoy, and is one of the few things that makes any sense to you anymore. A kernel of reprieve. You know the addiction is ruining everything else for you, but you do it anyway because nothing else matters except making yourself feel better right now.

There’s more nuance to the discussion, for sure, but the gist is addiction is a hobby gone problematic.

It’s always been difficult to make enough money to comfortably live off of as a full-time, touring musician, but it is especially precarious these days it seems. A lot of even the more well renown acts struggle to get by without the individual members having another source of income on the side (or multiple, often times).