opticalDeluge

I admire you for your openness to what life brings. My wife and I chose to terminate a pregnancy at 23 weeks last year because the baby had a serious birth defect. While we knew the physical defect itself could likely be fully repaired, we knew there was a strongly associated risk of mental/cognitive difficulties and ultimately decided that, if we were honest with ourselves, we simply did not have the resources we would need. But I learned alot in that time. I always felt that having the child would have been, to some degree, the morally right thing to do. But we could not do it. As a result my admiration for those who raise downs kids and others has grown exponentially. If I can ask, did you have an amnio or cvs when you were pregnant?

I'm entirely and totally pro-choice and always will be - in the sense I will never believe it should be the domain of law/state to mediate our own relationships to our bodies Still, that experience changed the way I think about abortion very much. I support it and will defend it but fear that we will eventually lose the real awareness that a unique life is being lost, even if is still the right choice. We wanted that child 100% but knew that we would be risking our own future well-being too much (and, so, our ability to care for her.) As we always said though, had we been a wealthy family with a different kind of employment and more resources, we may have made a very different choice. Please do stay strong and kind - kindness to one another was the one thing that really got us through. Will keep you in my thoughts.