Edit: sorry for the wall of text with no question :p
Hello sir!
I absolutely love everything you've done. Your music hits me in a way very few other artists are able to, a truly deep, emotional impact that at times can be a bit much. I've always been more rational than emotional as a person and therefor tend to bottle up or ignore my more intense emotions outside of happiness/excitement. While this worked for a time, I eventually noticed the toll of not dealing with how things had made me feel, i.e. emotions boiling over when I wouldn't want them to, basically forcing me to feel a strong (usually negative) emotion. Getting too mad at a small slight or panicking overmuch about a minor problem or despairing too greatly over some insignificant issue. After realizing this, and just sort of figuring out/working on myself a little more, I eventually became slightly more able to healthily deal with things, although part of that was just more skillfully bottling things up. I recently have lost some family of varying degrees of closeness, and found that while it was definitely hard and one of the saddest things I've had to deal with, I didn't find I was too affected by it. Then even more recently my dog died, and while I had had another family dog when I was young, she died before I could form any real bond with her. My parents live in NC with the dog and I am in VA, so I hadn't seen her but for trips down there every couple months over the last 3-4 years. I knew she was getting on in age and eventually this would happen, but I intellectualized it to the point of triviality and felt I was prepared. Well I got the call, and with the family deaths still hiding in my more recent memories, I had to sit down. I was speechless. My dad said she was acting funny and they took her to the emergency vet and came to the conclusion she had to be put down. There were some operations that could be done, but they were risky and any additional time they would give would be far too short for any real worth. I was at work at the time but about to get off, so I kept my composure as I prepared to leave, got out of there and started driving home. Worlds Apart had just come out and I had already listened to all 5 songs dozens of times, but as I started driving before I knew it I was starting it from Don't Leave once again. I started tearing up remembering all the good times with my dog, and the sounds coming from my car stereo seemed to gently surround and embrace me in the reassuring way of one person comforting another. And the words stopped being words...the words were hard, but in the most perfectly necessary way. And people can say what they want about electronic music, "it's just noise" "it sounds like Transformers fucking", but nothing in this world could have helped me the way that song did in that moment.
Then Worlds Apart came on.
I have taken this song into me in a way that I have only done with a handful of others. These are songs that I heard at a crucial point, that so perfectly fit into a moment in time that simply hearing the song later can send me right back into that moment. The way the song begins so quietly, and then Kerli starts singing like some kind of wounded angel, and the drums...everything about this song perfectly translated my emotions into language I could understand and in that moment I cried harder than I ever had in my entire life. Like I said I never really dealt with emotions and as I became a teenager I cried less and less until I just sort of stopped. Sure, things would make me sad/mad/etc but crying was just not a response to those kinds of things anymore. In that moment, after the first earth-shattering drop, I let it all out. Years of bottled emotion flowing full force. I could barely see the road and my face was soaked. I finally made it home and had to sit my car for a few minutes to regain my composure before going inside. Ever since that night, whenever I listen to Worlds Apart, a sensation comes over me that I have learned to relish. It is a feeling of true happiness, unencumbered by hidden sadness, that I have only felt in the absolute best moments of my life. All from one song, and the moment in which it helped me to fully embrace the human side of my being.
I don't actually have a question, I just wanted you to know that your music truly, truly does have an effect on people, or even just this person, but an effect so profoundly beneficial and magnificent that it changed me for the better. I mean it when I say I love your music, and simply wish to thank you for what you have done and what you will do. You're doing it right sir!
(also stop by VA/DC/MD area sometime soon! I unfortunately missed you last time around)
merkwthamouth11 karma
Edit: sorry for the wall of text with no question :p
Hello sir!
I absolutely love everything you've done. Your music hits me in a way very few other artists are able to, a truly deep, emotional impact that at times can be a bit much. I've always been more rational than emotional as a person and therefor tend to bottle up or ignore my more intense emotions outside of happiness/excitement. While this worked for a time, I eventually noticed the toll of not dealing with how things had made me feel, i.e. emotions boiling over when I wouldn't want them to, basically forcing me to feel a strong (usually negative) emotion. Getting too mad at a small slight or panicking overmuch about a minor problem or despairing too greatly over some insignificant issue. After realizing this, and just sort of figuring out/working on myself a little more, I eventually became slightly more able to healthily deal with things, although part of that was just more skillfully bottling things up. I recently have lost some family of varying degrees of closeness, and found that while it was definitely hard and one of the saddest things I've had to deal with, I didn't find I was too affected by it. Then even more recently my dog died, and while I had had another family dog when I was young, she died before I could form any real bond with her. My parents live in NC with the dog and I am in VA, so I hadn't seen her but for trips down there every couple months over the last 3-4 years. I knew she was getting on in age and eventually this would happen, but I intellectualized it to the point of triviality and felt I was prepared. Well I got the call, and with the family deaths still hiding in my more recent memories, I had to sit down. I was speechless. My dad said she was acting funny and they took her to the emergency vet and came to the conclusion she had to be put down. There were some operations that could be done, but they were risky and any additional time they would give would be far too short for any real worth. I was at work at the time but about to get off, so I kept my composure as I prepared to leave, got out of there and started driving home. Worlds Apart had just come out and I had already listened to all 5 songs dozens of times, but as I started driving before I knew it I was starting it from Don't Leave once again. I started tearing up remembering all the good times with my dog, and the sounds coming from my car stereo seemed to gently surround and embrace me in the reassuring way of one person comforting another. And the words stopped being words...the words were hard, but in the most perfectly necessary way. And people can say what they want about electronic music, "it's just noise" "it sounds like Transformers fucking", but nothing in this world could have helped me the way that song did in that moment.
Then Worlds Apart came on.
I have taken this song into me in a way that I have only done with a handful of others. These are songs that I heard at a crucial point, that so perfectly fit into a moment in time that simply hearing the song later can send me right back into that moment. The way the song begins so quietly, and then Kerli starts singing like some kind of wounded angel, and the drums...everything about this song perfectly translated my emotions into language I could understand and in that moment I cried harder than I ever had in my entire life. Like I said I never really dealt with emotions and as I became a teenager I cried less and less until I just sort of stopped. Sure, things would make me sad/mad/etc but crying was just not a response to those kinds of things anymore. In that moment, after the first earth-shattering drop, I let it all out. Years of bottled emotion flowing full force. I could barely see the road and my face was soaked. I finally made it home and had to sit my car for a few minutes to regain my composure before going inside. Ever since that night, whenever I listen to Worlds Apart, a sensation comes over me that I have learned to relish. It is a feeling of true happiness, unencumbered by hidden sadness, that I have only felt in the absolute best moments of my life. All from one song, and the moment in which it helped me to fully embrace the human side of my being.
I don't actually have a question, I just wanted you to know that your music truly, truly does have an effect on people, or even just this person, but an effect so profoundly beneficial and magnificent that it changed me for the better. I mean it when I say I love your music, and simply wish to thank you for what you have done and what you will do. You're doing it right sir!
(also stop by VA/DC/MD area sometime soon! I unfortunately missed you last time around)
<3
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