jo_annev

1) Would you please provide examples of how to "use" or access, etc., intuitive thought?

2) What are examples with experiential selves too?

3) I'm pretty mentally worn out as a caregiver and my situation is not that difficult. I'm not getting paid really, and have everything else to do already. What are things I can do to streamline the process of keeping my mom engaged intuitively and experientially?

Thank you!

I read the last 2 months of your blog entries. I don't have the money for more technology for streaming onto TVs, etc.

My mom is meaner than ever. What I'm trying to say is that it seems like you're asking for people to spend almost all awake time sharing stories, and or technological substitutes, etc., and a good mood. If that's the case, I already know that, but I'd lose my mind, income, boyfriend, etc., if that's all I do.

I already can't leave town to visit my boyfriend, I can't work many hours of the day, and I am just a bit frustrated reading book after book telling me how to do all of these different things that I don't have the resources to do.

Additionally, and this may not have anything to do with what you're presenting, it's difficult to take insults and condescension, ridicule, and a host of other negative behaviors and still always present a smile. I took this job on by choice, and it's not all bad, I'm not trying to say that it is.

What I think would help me more is how to separate her hurtfulness from the job I have to do. I try to show her things that she would enjoy, and it's not good enough and I try this and that and this is wrong and that's wrong. It just seems like it's not all lovely as these techniques are presented, I just need more practical things for real life situations.

If I'm off track, what do you mean?

What are examples?

Thank you!

All I ever feel is inadequate. I thought I was smart and capable, but all I feel is inferiority, frustration, hurt, anger, and of course after all that, guilt. As I said to someone else, this feels like being in a one-color room with no windows or doors. All I ever do is bounce from one thing to the next.

Yes, thank you.

Please write again.

That works only some of the time. "Do you want to see the sale advertisement?" "Yes, please" even if I don't want to. "Ireland was wonderful, it's such a friendly place." "Yes, I've heard that from other people as well"

What about when their situation is negative and agreeing means I'm confirming a bad thought? "They stole all my jewelry." (It actually was a fire.) "Your father had no sympathy for me." And this one in front of the other shoppers at the grocery store when I was following her list and repeatedly accommodated every question she had about the items in the cart: "You're spending all my money." "What did you do with the dishes I paid for? You owe me money." I don't.

EDIT: I don't mean to write in too much, please let me know if I am.

She gets down and angry enough as it is. As much of a jerk as I am by being snippy and frustrated, I haven't told her that she can't live alone, and that we need some help. I wish my sister or brother would just ask how I'm doing or say thank you once in a while. Somehow I think that would provide some balance to the situation.