iAmTheRealLange

I remember watching Superbad around Christmas time one year and thinking, "holy shit, Bernard the Elf is doing coke. He really fell off, huh?"

So I just wanted to say, thanks for popping up in random scenes and making my day every time.

Carefully package said drugs in a double-wrapped plastic baggie, seal it up nice and tight and cram that baby up your ass. Might have to move your head out of the way first, though.

Righteous Orange sounds like a shitty De Niro film.

I have a Boston accent and it cracks me up so hard when people type like this

That tweet at McDonald’s about the broken ice cream machine a few weeks ago was my favorite tweet of 2017