dafragsta

Oh man... I'd love to see that scene play out with Mac from Always Sunny.

Secret Service: OK, Mr... McDonald? It's really important that we go through some procedures before you meet the president. We must always plan for the worst so...

Mac: Oh yeah, I totally get it. You want me to scope out the perimeter and look for all entrances and exits? Don't be afraid to ask.

SS: That won't be necessary. We've got everything under control. We just need you to be aware that we have a security vehicle nearby should there be any incidents and we'll help get you there as safely as...

Mac: Wait, that's it? No forward rolls? I'm well versed in the art of the occular patdown and I'm ready to go Steven Seagal at a moment's notice. Question: when do I get my gun? I was thinking kind of an M-16, but maybe something more compact like an Uzi.

SS: That will not be happening.

Mac: What if someone takes all you guys out and it's just me and the president?

SS: We've got it under control. There are roughly 80 armed personnel in and around the White House. Here comes the president now.

President: OK, I'm here. Hey, uuuuuuh..... so where is he? Where's the guy?

SS: This is Mr. McDonald, Mr. President.

Prez: Wait, I thought you said I was meeting Ronald McDonald.

[car backfires]

Mac: We gotta go!

[cut to title card]

Was it from all the cock pushups?

Everyone wins!

and somehow it's perfectly OK that they raise their children to hate outsiders.