churakaagii

I used to be a part of the bondage scene a few years back, but as a Japanese-American, I felt really uncomfortable with the way Japanese language and culture was used. Speaking with a couple of Japanese people who floated through, the general response I got was, "Well, this isn't Japan, so they can say and do what they want, right? I don't mind," but with a strong subtext of "so long as they keep paying me."

I am all for playing with power dynamics between individuals, but when you add in elements of appropriating my own culture, I felt incredibly uncomfortable. Ironically, a strong example can be found on the wikipedia page for "Japanese Rope Bondage." After a pedantic discourse about which Japanese term is more "authentic," you have a picture labeled "French Shibari." It is of a white woman in a cheongsam, which is Chinese. Both the essay and the picture make me really uncomfortable, to put it mildly. And it's pretty emblematic of the attitudes I felt permeate the bondage scene towards Asian culture.

I don't know of a way to ask a question about this that won't sound leading or aggressive, but I am hoping you will respond to this. When I tried to gently bring up these topics in private with people I felt comfortable with, I was met with at best confusion, and at worst outright hostility. To be honest, I expect I'm going to get downvoted to oblivion here.

I don't mind being objectified if it's negotiated with a partner. But with the whole scene doing that sort of thing or ignoring it, I felt like there was no safe place for me without giving tacit permission to erode parts of myself I hold dearly.

However, in Okinawa, they seems to have a word amejo which means women who go out with American GIs.

It's really insulting. If you say it about someone, you are also saying you think she's trashy. You don't use it for anyone just because they are dating a foreigner. But I'm sure there are some feelings towards foreigners mixed up in there.

As someone who is half Japanese, growing up outside Japan and now living there, I really appreciate your thoughts here. I hope you can help spread a more open attitude in Japanese society. :)

/r/leagueoflegends, a heavily trafficked subreddit, went completely without mods for a week a couple of months back, as the mods decided they were sick of people complaining about moderation and show what happens to a sub like that w/o mods. Did you see any of that? You could probably get at least one article out of that debacle alone.