chekhovsdickpic

I would tell you to always be vigilant and listen to your girlfriend.

Screenshotting this and sending to my cabin-dwelling boyfriend WHO REALLY NEEDS TO FIX THE LATCHES ON HIS DOORS AND STOP THROWING CORN OFF HIS DECK INTO THE WOODS.

My coworker took pity on me and was like “Aren’t you gonna say hi to Bear?” after he saw how hard I was struggling to ignore his support dog. So I cuddled the hell out of that good boy.

That good boy then attempted to ditch his owner and follow me to my car. I was horrified, but coworker was amused and just said I obviously must need more emotional support than he does. I know a support animal isn’t trained like a service animal, but I still felt like a dick for temporarily breaking his dog.

Part of me wants this to have much milder side effects than female birth control so that men will be more likely to take them and I can enjoy not being a crazy hormonal mess for once.

But another part of me is like “Yes yes, make them suffer. Make them all sad fat tired trainwrecks with breakthrough bleeding and sore boobs.”

I’ll just blame that part of me on the birth control.

I’m totally using that on him midcoitus.

Bears are ambulatory trash compactors so probably.