byany_othername

There is one older guy who buys a lot of porn from us. He's hilarious and really sweet. always talks about how this one particular mannequin keeps making inappropriate comments towards him and it's making him very uncomfortable. one time someone was creeping on me and he made a hilarious show of putting his arm around me (he's about three times my age) and telling dude that he should back off unless he likes it up the ass from strap-ons in which case he'd be happy to watch. Just a funny pleasant old man with no one else to talk to. His health is poor, so there's no telling how much longer he'll be with us. :(

edited: so as not to identify anyone

Me neither.

the biggest dildo that we carry is the Great American Challenge (the non-vibrating version) but my boss swears we used to have a bigger one. I like "I Wanna Buttfuck your Daughter" because it's the worst line ever to use on anyone, and I also found "Black Thai Affair" to be quite clever. my friend wants to make "Call of Booty: Back Dat Ass Ops"

haha pretty frequently. I usually kick it up a notch--i.e. if they say "Got any butt plugs?" I say "Oh I was hoping someone would ask, because we have a bet going on here to see who can take the biggest one and I was hoping I could get someone to try the Colossus." That usually either gets them to hang up or devolves into hilarity, and no one loses.

JACK?!