Highest Rated Comments


ariiiiigold1306 karma

my penis looks like a stumpy carrot, but it hasn't affected me because the last time a girl saw it was back in 2003 when i pulled it out in my drunken stupor and a girl slapped it away with an umbrella

ariiiiigold823 karma

OPERATION GET DOLL TO CHILD

  1. If you have a doll to send, join this subreddit.

  2. Once reese015 replies with postal details, I will communicate such to all interested parties.

  3. We all send dolls. Not just for this chap, but for all his friends too.

  4. The result? HAPPY CHILDREN. HUNDREDS OF HAPPY CHILDREN.

LET'S DO THIS (said in the voice of Daymon of Daym Drops fame)

Edit:

The people have spoken. Rather than sending cases of dolls, money could also be spent on food, tuition, medicine and other necessities. Some can send dolls, others can donate money.

ariiiiigold534 karma

As a young boy growing up in rural England, I would often wile away the evenings by playing outside. One day, I found a little fat bumblebee quietly buzzing on the ground. I carefully picked it up and brought him inside. I put him inside an empty match box, and named him Harry. My plan was to take him to the hospital the next day, but he sadly passed overnight. I buried him in the garden, where his fat little soul still rests today. Anyway, that was my first experience of death - and it made me want to become a doctor when I was older so that I could care for others in need. I'm older now, but not a doctor - I decided to go into investment banking. Dolla bills, yo. Thanks for all you do and the sacrifices you make.

ariiiiigold511 karma

You doin' it, man. Folding and packing t-shirts. Purchasing envelopes. Affixing postal stamps. Mailing that shit. That's what up, baby. You doin' it, man.

ariiiiigold396 karma

He butchered a family of them in Afghanistan. He even decapitated a group of innocent beakers.