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andreipmbcn94 karma

Ms Pizzey, let me express my greatest thanks for this AMA. I deeply appreciate all the work you have done.

  • Looking at it from a perspective of abuse and neglect, would you say that there is a general attitude of neglect towards men today?

  • Do you believe that services for domestic abuse should be unisex, or should they be gender-segregated? (if this was asked in the last AMA, I apologize and will look there)

  • Did you feel the need for a real attachment figure (i.e. parent figure) in light of your biological parents' abuse, and if so, how and when did you find one?

andreipmbcn86 karma

I'm not dr. Helen Smith, but here's the website for the National Coalition for Men in the US:


andreipmbcn25 karma

Nasty people will always throw false labels at you to detract from the issues, since a clear understanding of the issues will reveal to everyone that the nasty people are actually causing the issues themselves. If you openly advocate for these issues, you will be called a misogynist, but only by those who want to bring men further into ruin; and most if not all of them will be distant strangers who will be unable to impact your life.

If you cave in to it and stop talking, then other solitary voices will briefly rise up on occasion, and they will encounter the same malicious accusations. Perhaps they, too, will succumb to these accusations and become silent. If, however, you continue to talk about the issues and ward off the offense-mongers (by bringing them out of your life and blocking them on the internet), then eventually, as more good people speak up and you befriend each other, there will be enough of you so that your words become enduring: the general public will grow familiar with your stances, with how you see yourselves, with what attitudes you want people to possess and what attitudes you don't, and so as soon as the harpies swoop in to complain in earshot of everyone else, you will not have to say "oh, but you misunderstand, we're not really misogynists"; you will instead be perfectly entitled to say: "Sir/madam, I think everyone knows this is not true."

You don't have to talk about these issues in your workplace or anywhere sensitive at first, but if you bring them up outside of such places, the issues themselves will no longer be sensitive in the end.

andreipmbcn19 karma

http://toysoldier.wordpress.com/stop-the-abuse/ (lists several charities, most of them in the UK)

There was also a really nice website providing support for male victims - I'll see if I can find it.