TheRealSweetLou

I have before. Last time though I had to shit and there was sex going on in every stall so I had to go out back and shit in the woods drunker than a one-eyed catfish swimming backwards in a bird bath. It was hard. It all depends on how drunk I am I would say.

1. Yes. Every night. There's always that one dude who is too sketchy to get in. We just tell him no or that the cover is stupid high. He doesn't argue because we're a lot bigger. 2. If somebody says they're going to fight me I wait for them to throw the first punch, by law I have to. Then I fuck with them and yell "You fucked up now Wheat Thins! I'm about to push your shit in!" They try to figure out what that means as I hit them and/or drag them out of the bar. And my fellow bouncers usually come to my aid quickly. 3. Women/liquor/tips. And if I let some waiters I know in for free, they'll usually give me a free meal at their restaurant. 4. We always help the guys who help us. You scratch our backs, and we'll make sure you don't get killed. Thanks dude!

Stabbing hurt a lot more. Mostly because I took a knife...to the knee. I had to have stitches and almost surgery because of the stabbing. Thank goodness that dude was drunk or else it may have been worse. Tazing hurt for about 10 minutes but there was no after effect. Immediate pain goes to the tazer. Long run pain goes to stabbing.

Squatted 680, benched 487, dead lifted 724. It was in kilos, so that's why its weird numbers.

Dude came in went to the middle of the dancefloor shit on the ground and kicked it all over people. Then threw up on my buddy as we were kicking him out. What an asshole