StarsofSobek

This saying, while common enough, annoys me, too. I grew up Christian, but this has never felt like something my God would do.

As I've become older, the saying is still bothersome, but I've come to reflect on it as being meant to say:

God does things that are bigger than our understanding and you are involved in that plan. While you may not know your place in that plan or the reasons for this horrible, horrible thing to have happened to you, you exist because your life has a great, unseen purpose.

It makes the phrase "God does everything for a reason" so petty and flawed, but I believe that to be the true intention behind it, nonetheless.

Alternatively, it is meant with hope that people say these things.

They hope that you will fight for your life when the time comes, that you will fight to give strength to others, that you will fight so that the fear they face regarding the situation might be overcome by sharing with you their love so that you do not give up.

Sometimes, words meant in love are the only gifts we have to give in trying times.

Sorry, I know that is long and pretty silly to break down, but I have grown up my whole life hearing that phrase. That bothersome, diminishing phrase. Yet those words hold so much more value than most might be inclined believe.

This is strictly my experience with that, and I may be wrong in how Psychiatry helps others, but based off of my experience alone:

Psychiatry was offered to me by a gp who doesn't believe in fibromyalgia. To quote: "That's what they tell people they don't want to deal with." I was then told that fibromyalgia is purely psychosomatic - that I needed to take an SSRI for anxiety and to basically shut up and be medicated. This was after I had been evaluated (at her request) by a rheumatologist specialist and the local MAU. This was after a bout of having serotonin toxicity from a low-dose SSRI that my go had previously prescribed that forced me to go to ER.

My gp's response was completely dismissive and unacceptable.

I think a lot of the problem is that because there are only symptoms but no evidence to cause the pain, there's the idea that fibromyalgia is "fake".

That said, I'm not wasting my time attending appointments and making up pain, and I do NOT want to be written off and live my life medicated. I'm searching for a new gp and hope people in the medical field who disregard fibromyalgia can start treating it as more than something that's "all in your head."

I don't have time for people to tell me that my pain is all in my head and then write me off. Pain - caused by my head or not - is real, and if my brain is misfiring, I need to be taken seriously. I'm absolutely sick of having to crawl up my stairs and be exhausted by doing the simplest tasks. Like anyone with chronic pain, I simply want to live a normal life (and especially enjoy my time with my toddler and loved ones.)

Pushing for me to go to a Psychiatrist isn't going to actively pursue a cure or opportunity to address the issue properly - it was a band-aid offered to shut me up.

It's really horrible sounding, but I had a friend who's doctor recommended she cut back and try to wean her smoking habit while pregnant (but not quit entirely).

I thought it horrible advice. However, I researched and asked my own doctor about it out of concern, and, it's not uncommon advice given to pregnant smokers. The physical stress of quitting can actually cause more harm to the foetus. It can cause the body to abort, in worst cases. Most doctors do recommend weaning down until the mother can quit, but some doctors (sadly) do advise pregnant women not to quit until the child is born.

Follow up: I have encountered a few friends who were going to school to become nurses. They opted to quit because they were required to get vaccinated. They are also some of the most opinion-driven anti-vaxxers I have ever run into - often citing their "training" as a soapbox to attract others. Is there any way to prevent such outright nonsense, both in the field and outside of it? I've seen a lot of folks lose faith in vaccines when their relative/friend is a medical professional (of some degree) who is also anti-vaxx.

What sort of screening process, if any, did you have to go through to qualify as a surrogate? I think it's amazing that you could do this for the new parents, by the way. I'm sure they are over the moon for that baby!