Sir_Meowsalot

I hope you followed her up the stairs slowly while caressing the spoon ever so gently. Then as she locked herself in the bathroom you would flick the spoon back and forth under the door telling her how you want to touch her pretty skin.

You should take it to bed with you and lay it next to your pillow whispering sweet nothings to it as your wife slowly edges away from you.

Then without warning get angry at the spoon tell it you will not do what the spoons suggests to do to your wife. As her eyes grow larger in fear...make eye contact and slowly mouth the words, "I love you," then allow a small sinister smile creep up on your face. Extra points if you can muster up some fake tears.

Zoo hazing can be pretty daunting.

Holy shit. That cub just didn't know when you quit. Honestly, if I grabbed a bear cub like that I'd have chucked it at the bear mom like it was a live hand grenade without the pin.

Since no one has yet asked this: What are you're experiences (funny, boring, awe-inspiring, disgusting etc) with Wildlife while treeplanting?