Re-Created

Get home from work at 7, make dinner, relax on the couch for 15 minutes. Open up a dating app, swipe through 50 profiles, get a single match. Send her a message, no reply. Realize that if you don't go to bed soon you'll be exhausted for the whole week.

Repeat until you reach Friday without a date. Watch a show until you decide to catch up on the sleep you missed during the week. Get a few errands done before the work week starts up again. Start again at the beginning of the post.

Its no wonder so many people who would like to go on a date just say 'screw it, I'll focus on work for a while then get back to dating'.

Color in general is not a clear signal in the mind. So much of what we see is our brain making assumptions about the lighting and the colors around what we're looking at. This sort of explains "the dress" picture from years ago.

So it's not shocking she could get someone's skin tone wrong just by visuals. Especially when she is looking at things away from their skin to identify them, like hair or clothes.

Hi Jim, Nick, and Whitney! I find a lot of people think their problems are "not big enough for therapy". I was wondering, do you ever find yourself in a situation where you recommend a new patient not continue treatment? Like in a "this probably isn't the best use of your money and our time" kind of way?

100%. A mistake I see in people's analysis (that's even the OP made, imo) is saying that being overworked makes people not want to date. It implies that the desire is what's missing. In my experience, that isn't it. It's the work that has to go into dating that is the barrier.

Most 20 something people would go on a date, but finding someone is legit work, except it doesn't help pay the bills. If your time is limited you essentially have to choose between financial needs and emotional needs. To me once you frame it like that no wonder younger people are unhappy, we can't afford to be.

That's good advice thoughtfully written. Anyone who identified with what I wrote should read your comment afterwards.

For me personally, I'm not in that cycle anymore, and I wasn't for too long. But it stuck with me because it was so easy to fall into. It just felt like I was doing what I needed at the time, even if it didn't mean I'd get out. It's a situation that seems like the modal outcome for someone in that subset of society.

I think if it's an indictment of anything it's of the work culture that demands so much of someone at a point in their life where they have so many other aspects of themselves to nurture.