NULLizm

precisely why he has surrounded himself with smart and competent patriots

Except all the spots he can't fill. And the others that have either quit, been fired, or had a media scandal and forced to step down. Sad

Back in high school i was friends with a group of guys that formed a youth group. It was comprised of about 20 guys from my grade and the grade below. The guys in the lower grade wanted to go have a camping trip with the leaders out at the nearest lake.

So it's roughly 10pm that friday and we are sitting around trying to come up with something to do. Someone mentions pranking the lower grade anf we are all in. Within an hour we are out there at the lake decked in black head to toe with various things like bats and an actual chainless chainsaw. One of my friends even has a ghillie suit.

We park and grab our gear and start walking the mile or so to their campsite. (We know where they are since we all used this campsite). We think "we better not have any lights on or they will see us". Off the lights go and we start walking, slowly. It becomes apparent that this is easier said than done. The little rustlings here and there combined with the near complete darkness was enough to force us to walk with our arms linked. So there we are: 5 dudes walking arm in arm, one in a ghillie suit and one carryinh a chainsaw, in the dark of night. Suddenly one of us stops dead, halting the group.

There is a noise on up ahead, a lot of noise all of a sudden. Directly in front of us we can hear it: kksshhshs kksshshs. We start to basically whimper in a catonic state as the noise starts moving toward us.

Fuck this, i hear my friend say as he tries to scramble for the flashlight. The noises keep coming toward us, disregarding our now feeble attempts at scaring it off. My one friend fumbling with the light, one i can feel is backing up, and another and i -we played soccer growing up- are reassurring ourselves that whatever it is 'if it comes closer is getting kicked either in the head or groin'.

After what feels like eternity, standing in blackness while death-gripping my friend, we finally got the light out to see a huge beast a family of opossums not 1 meter away.

The collective sigh of relief was tangible. The best part of this story comes after this when we get to become the "monster in the woods" ourselves but this is your ama

So you're saying we should all show up to the wedding?

My god, you are truly deranged.

Damn, does that fuck with dolphins or whales?