MonicaRaznahanLPC

I'm sorry to hear that. Grieving is never easy or comfortable, but it's something we go through. The more you can be honest with yourself and allow yourself to be in the moment with your feelings right now, the less you will feel the need to struggle with them later. I say that knowing how hard this is...the feelings can be quite intense, but they will ebb and flow. Give yourself permission to ride the wave, knowing that it won't always be like this. Spend time with your parents and enjoy the time you have with them right now, in this moment. Let them know how you feel about them. Share memories. Your willingness to be there with them will hopefully be a meaningful experience for all.

I wish you all the best in your cancer journey. It's important to keep engaging in activities that are meaningful to you and connecting with the people you care about the most. So often, there's a tendency to isolate and that can definitely do more harm to your mental and physical health. To the extent that you're able, continue to live you life and enjoy the time you have. Also, be kind and patient with yourself. This journey can be an exhausting one, so try not to beat yourself up if your body isn't responding the way it used to. Take things one day at a time and know that there are many support services available to assist you if needed.

Thanks for providing clarification. This is a tough question, because it's really hard to know if there's a right answer. Optimists tend to see the glass half full, and pessimists see the glass half empty. Both are correct, just different perspectives on the world, and it's quite hard to turn a pessimist into an optimist or vice versa. Overall, it's healthy to have a more balanced approach to cancer, if possible. So, not being overly positive and potentially unrealistic about outcome or overly negative and possibly causing yourself more stress and anguish about worst case scenario. I'm not sure if that answers your question, but I hope it's helpful.

Cancer is fucked up. I 100% agree. I can tell how painful this experience with your mom has been for you. You did nothing wrong. None of this is your fault. Your mother wanted to be more comfortable at your wedding, and the doctors provided her with medication that temporarily helped her symptoms. That meant that you had a few wonderful weeks enjoying her company and seeing her happy. That's priceless. While I'm not a physician, I have seen how sometimes after a trial of medications to control symptoms, the cancer appears to come back even stronger. That's a disheartening and confusing thing to witness. I'm glad to hear that therapy has been helpful to you in the past. There is not one right answer to how one can overcome, cope or accept...everyone's experience will be different, but therapy can definitely help.

You are amazing, is what I would say. Please recognize the incredible gift you are offering people just by being there to listen, support, encourage and help. So often, people going through this journey feel isolated, because they no longer can relate to "normal" people around them. It's extremely helpful to have at least one or two people with whom they feel comfortable processing their feelings. It would be great also to refer your friends, loved ones to a support group as well, if they are open to that. The support groups give cancer patients and survivors a place to share with others who are experiencing something similar, so that they don't feel so alone in their experiences. This feeling of community can be very helpful, and it might help them identity other resources or educational things that will benefit them. These wonderful people that you mention, who are acting as therapists for friends and loved ones also need to really stay mindful of their own self care and recognize that they can quickly become depleted if they don't make the time for themselves too.