MickeyMcSticky

Hi, Twister is my girlfriends favorite movie and I'm deathly afraid of tornadoes. I mean really afraid, every time the siren goes off it sends chills up my body and I pack the cats up in a beer box and hide in the bathroom shaking. Can I be in Twister 2?

Hello, I would love to talk anonymously to someone like you. I have come to the conclusion that I have been depressed for many years (a decade or so) and I can't pull myself out of it.

Even though I am fully aware of it some things just don't work like they should with my emotions, for example I don't really feel much sadness when someone dies, I have to force myself to act like I care about people when I know I am supposed to, and I have lost entirely the ability to get angry (I also have to pretend/act when I'm supposed to) or feel concern for people. I don't feel genuine emotions except maybe humor, I love to crack jokes and amuse myself (and others) most of the time when its probably not even appropriate, its just how I deal with everything. I like humor that is just plain wrong, so at least I guess I'm in the right place (reddit) huh?

This does and has hindered me for some time and manifests itself in me having a hard time wanting to go anywhere or do anything. I could contently just live the rest of my life sitting in front of this computer screen if I was able to do so. I have a strong fear of being outside and I dislike people(human nature?), I like being alone.

I've had a girlfriend for 5 years and we don't ever argue, but because I don't ever really show any emotion she says she feels like I don't care about her. She is having a hard time dealing with me because I guess I am kind of distant emotionally, it makes her cry sometimes. I really do care about her and love her, if love is such a thing.

Despite all this I don't have any ill-will towards people and I believe in being a good person and helping people if possible, if only it would make this world a little bit less horrible. I smile to make others feel better when they see me, but I don't really do it for any other reason, in no way am I ever happy to see anyone or happy about anything at all really.

My question is, is there really something THAT wrong with me and what can I do to help me function better with other people and live a normal life? Or does it even matter if I am perfectly content right now?

People tend to become more honest with themselves and others after going through some sort of mental and physical struggle, some people go their entire lives without experiencing any significant hardship. If someone who hasn't is in a relationship with someone who has, their mindsets will be completely different from each other and it is just unlikely to happen. The entire way of thinking is different and other than a physical attraction there wouldn't be any other connection.

Not everything is black and white though, not everyone is the same. People who have similar and/or compatible ideals will naturally get along with one another, but the match won't always be exact. You probably attract and are attracted to these women because they feel comfortable talking to you, because honesty is what you both look for, with yourselves and with each other.

Different strokes for different folks, we just can't sit here and talk about it or else we'll soon be stereotyping people by their ideals. If you get along with a certain type of person its probably because you both commonly value some trait or ideal each other has. Figure out what that is and what you want and there will be your answer.

I am a broken person who doesn't feel anything for the world around me, yet I am still functional. I have no ambition, no desire to do anything I don't have to, but I'm still content and could care less. I don't like people but want the best for them, I'm lazy but work meticulously on things until they are perfect. I attract people who have just gone through some struggle as well, because even with all my flaws I am a very stable and predictable person. People in turmoil desire stability, sometimes they change, sometimes they don't. Maybe you are this same or a similar type of person.

One thing is for sure though, people that are in turmoil aren't the person they will always be. They will eventually develop into another person that may or may not be compatible with you. You can try to understand who that person will become, but you can't change it, if you do they will reject you eventually. People need their freedom and space to become who they will become, if you end up spending the rest of your life with that person happily then fantastic, if you don't then so be it.

Oh yea, incoming wall of text.

Well even if its not me you definitely need that guy in the next one. Perhaps they find him mumbling to himself when a twister rips open his mobile home exposing him in his bathtub with his cats.

I guess I really just want my life to be better, but I don't have any interest in anything so I don't know what to do. I can't really afford a therapist and I don't trust them anyways except here anonymously on the internet. I made a slight mention of thoughts of suicide when I was a teenager and was sent to a "rehabilitation center" for a week, it did nothing for me except made me completely lose trust in "professionals" who are really only out for themselves.

Years ago (when my depression started), I hurt someone I cared about and attempted suicide then hit rock bottom. I was sent to the hospital then jail for a while and went through a bunch of different "centers" that didn't really do anything as well. I lost everything I had and I haven't really gained much in these 10 years since, I lost my wife, my house, was discharged from the military, even lost my damn dog, everything. I feel like the effects of that day are on my back every second of my life and will never go away.

I no longer have any desire to commit suicide, nor did I really at the time, it was just a spur of the moment impulse thing and was stupid. Thought the way I look at it I wouldn't might dying, if I could save someone at the cost of my life I feel like I would have no reservations about doing so. To end my own life though, I know I couldn't do that now even if I wanted to, plus its a silly thing to do anyways.

I have just been sort of floating through life for a long time, I don't feel anything and don't really care about anything. I figured maybe I was depressed because my emotions have become so numb. Every penny I make goes to pay debt and probably will until I'm old, so there is not really any point in making money except to pay someone else for some stupid thing I did or because of their own greed... forever.

It causes some problems with me, like I say things I shouldn't sometimes because of my lack of care. It causes me to lose jobs, friends and I know later that I was stupid, but at the time I feel like nothing matters so why hold back? I get tired of watching people pretend to be nice and put on these fake smiles, care only about themselves or just be dicks. Very few people are actually honest and care about others, its like the weight of everyones dishonesty is crushing my faith in humanity, I hate living in a world like that and I hate the way people are, even myself. I would like to make the world better for people even if I am careless, but what can I do? The people that have the power to do it generally don't. I hate to think about what the world will be like 20, 50 or 100 years from now, I don't know how the hell we are going to survive.

I just can't pull myself out of this hole I've dug for myself and I feel like even trying is pointless because its probably not going to happen. I keep hoping maybe someone will give me a legit helping hand one day and help me to stand up again, but nobody gives a shit, it seems like that only exists in movies. I know its sad and pathetic to listen to me whine on about being so hopeless, but every time I try it seems like I fail or find another reason to quit giving a shit. Nobody really cares about anyone else, because if someone does they will just get taken advantage of and change their mind or won't be able to.

I don't have any drug problems, no anger problems, nothing like that. I just need a hand to pick myself up again and I don't really know where to look. I don't think therapy would help even if I could afford it, I don't know if there is anything that will ever be able to change the way I feel. Its a miserable, cynical but enlightening existence. I am surprisingly good at giving others advice when they need it, but I can't help myself and don't have a clue when it comes to that. I said I was content, but its more like I have just accepted that my situation blows and I drag myself out of bed everyday regardless.

I think the only thing that would really make me feel any better is if I got a bunch of money or something, shallow, but true. I would just live, paying for dumb material things that would make me happy for the moment. I should set goals maybe? What goal? Become an even bigger douchebag, help people that I will never be able to help, change the world? Nothing will ever change, people will always be people, why should I do it? I can't accomplish anything worthwhile at this point. Who am I and why do I matter? I don't matter and neither does anyone else, this is just a pointless and stupid world that will only become worse with a bunch of hairless monkeys running around buttering their own asses and beating others down to make their own miserable faces feel better about themselves. I think I would rather get abducted by aliens and butt probed for the rest of my life than live on this miserable planet.

There is people a lot worse off than me, I wonder how they manage? Maybe they are just a lot stronger than I am. I close my eyes and tell myself that to stop being a pussy, then when I open them everything sucks again. Sigh... I need to get up and work up the willpower to go look for another crap job again, thanks for the reply.